Ask Ravenpaw and Barley who's on top
Lock Feathertail, Leafpool and Nightcloud in a tiny room together and have them fight over Crowfeather
Tell Darkstripe that Tigerclaw's in love with Fireheart and that's why he keeps rejecting him
Whenever Firestar and Graystripe (or anyone, actually) share tongues, tell them to get a room
Ask Dustpelt if he's ever heard of birth control
Whenever Firestar's quiet, ask him if he's thinking about Spottedleaf
Bonus if Sandstorm's with him
Tell Leafpool her mentor used to have the hots for her dad
Constantly ask Jayfeather how many claws your holding up
10.) While everyone is asleep in the warrior den, push Ashfur on top of Squirrelflight and say loudly, "Ashfur! Not again!"