«Are you sure you wanna do this ?»
His voice was calm almost like a whisper. He knew how hard this decision was for her, how this fight defined her life for so long. He didn't want her to have any regrets even if it was the best present she could ever give him.
She turned around to meet his eyes incapable to react. "Yes" she answered after a brief moment. At the second she spoke he took her hand gently and even in the dark of the archives he could see a single tear running slowly on her cheek. With his other hand he made it disappear as if he was trying so hard to erase her pain. There was no words he could tell her, nothing to change what happened. But he wanted to show her he would always be by her side.
"Kate, I know..." He managed to start talking but she cut him off knowing exactly what he meant.
"No, Castle, It's okay, I have to do this. I have to let go. For my mom. For me. For us .."
Her voice was shy and her words were hesitant. His face drew a smile. "For us" her last words were playing in his mind over and over again. A few days ago she would have run away from everyone to chase that guy, she would have died for this case and now she was here, standing with him and speaking about "them".
"What changed ?" Castle regretted his question the second he asked it but he needed to know. He wanted to know if she wouldn't change her mind. Worried of her reaction he looked at her. She just smiled gently and squeezed his hand tight knowing exactly what he meant.
"I guess I reconsidered my priorities... I don't want anything to happen to you or the guys. And I don't want to waste another minute of my life" She bit her lips at her last sentence. Castle gave her a comprehensive look and let her continue. "I understand now that I won't be able to win this one"
"Are you happy ?"
His question surprised her at first. She never really thought of that. She always thought she would never find peace again. Part of her never wanted to find happiness because she knew more than anyone that it could be gone in a minute. She wouldn't be able to live another tragic loss.
The little bright and innocent Kate Beckett died a long time ago, when she saw that detective in front of her door 13 years ago. But now, everything was changing. Richard Castle, the man she thought was annoying, self-centered, egotistical .. completely changed her plan and now she was re-considering being happy and having a future. Only time would help her now.
"Kate ?" His voice flew in the air and brought her back to life. Since how long was she gone with her thoughts ? He needed an answer. He needed to know she would be here, full and open to start this new chapter of her life with him.
"I'm sure I will be" She said with a small smile on her face. It's was a light of hope, a promised. She couldn't tell him she was happy now. It was too soon and she couldn't lie to him. Not now, after everything that happened this past year. Plus, she knew he wouldn't buy it. Richard Castle knew Kate Beckett more than anyone else and she couldn't help but smile at this idea.
Her eyes left his and went back on the box in front of them. All she had to do was to put the file in it and to close it … for good. Castle took off her hand and stood right behind her. He knew she needed to do this by herself. He had to give her the space she needed to find closure and to move on. But he was here as always to help her stand if she was falling. She took a long deep breath and slowly she placed the box with the others. Her mother's murder was a part of her and will always be but she was ready to move on.
When she was ready she turned around to watch Castle, a nostalgic smile on her face.
"Do you need to spend some time alone ?" Castle whispered.
"No. I... Would you stay with me for the night ? I mean... if you have nowhere else to be" Kate asked shyly.
He laughed gently at her reaction and opened his arm "Come here" She walked closer and they stayed there, in each other arms for a few minutes.
He didn't know that side of Kate Beckett but it made him love her even more. She was a strong and independent woman for sure but after this past 2 days together he had learned so much about her. She let him see her vulnerability and her romantic side. He could only called himself the happiest man in the world for all the things she let him discover.
He kissed her forehead as they leave each other warm.
"What do you wanna do now ?" he asked.
"About what ?"
"About us ? It's still real right ?"
"Of course, Castle, it's real."
They both smiled at her words.
"What are we telling to everyone ?"
She thought about the question for one second. She knew what was going to happen once the guys and Lanie learn they are finally a couple. All the inside jokes, the bets, the "I told you so". All she wanted was to enjoy her intimate time with Castle, and the secret lovers thing could be funny. She looked at him playful.
"What if it stays our little secret for a while?"
He smile at the idea and nodded with enjoyment.
They started to leave the archives when he stopped at the door and asked excited :
"What should we do to be sure they won't find out ? Maybe we can ..."
"Just … act normal. If that's even possible for you"
"Hey ! Detective Beckett, This one hurts" he said as they both started to laugh.
At those words they made their way out and went back to Beckett's desk finally ready to start this new page together.
THE END.