Already Gone
A small smile graced Hinata's lips as her lavender eyes watched the window. She clasped her hands together and patiently waited… even though three hours had already passed.
In the glass' reflection she could see all the activities taking place within the restaurant: waiters taking orders, couples laughing, men singing and herself… sitting… alone... in a white dress accompanied by silver heels and a braid of waist-length dark blue hair.
15,000 ryo. She had spent 15,000 ryo on her appearance. As she looked more carefully at her reflection, she decided it had been well spent— except he wasn't here to see it, and so automatically it was a waste.
The 25 year old woman chuckled lightly as another waitress slowed her step while walking by her. Though Hinata took pleasure in the same indiscrete curious glances people gave her as they passed by, she took more joy when they were bold enough to ask questions.
Earlier in the night, a particularly bold waiter had approached her table for two- which was still occupied by one- and directly asked, "Lady Hokage, you look lovely tonight, but where is your husband?"
"He's standing me up," was her casual reply.
The subsequent confusion/ pity on the waiter's face still humored her.
"Why are you here then if he's standing you up?" he asked.
She had smiled brilliantly at this question and honestly answered, "Because, … I play a heartbreaking game called love. And apparently, he succeeds at crushing me every time."
At his "saddened" expression, she laughed, but to be kind she decided to order.
That's why she now sat before the most expensive dish the restaurant owned on her finely clothed table. Even though she ordered it, she hadn't touched the Sukiyaki. No matter how scrumptious it smelt or how hungry she was, she refused to eat anything without him present.
Now that three hours had passed and only fifteen minutes remained of the fourth anniversary date to be ruined, the food was noticeably cold and the appeal had been long lost.
She gently raised her hand, awaiting her waiter's return. A few seconds later, the man arrived at her side, looking quite sorry for her.
"Check, please," she quietly requested.
The waiter grimaced. She hadn't even touched her food! Hopefully her husband had some grand reason to leave her alone like this.
Hinata smiled, as if she knew the waiter's exact thoughts. She scanned her bill and let out a soft breath.
5,000 ryo for the dinner.
Hinata politely handed the man his well-deserved money with a hefty 1000 ryo tip.
The man eyed the tip guiltily, "Certainly you cannot be leaving such a generous tip as this for such a terrible night?"
She smiled again. "I enjoyed waiting here. The seats were comfortable, the traditional music was divine and the service is exceptional. If anything, I am under-tipping you."
The waiter smiled sadly. "I'm sorry."
She rose from her seat and walked towards the door of the restaurant. "Don't be," she whispered to the waiter as she passed by, heels clicking behind her.
He had 15 minutes left to show up… but even she knew when to give up.
The rain ran through her hair, dripping down her face. Tons of hours putting on makeup had been wasted as she was sure her mascara was running, staining her pink blush-filled cheeks to black. The rain soaked her dress and caused her feet to float in her shoes.
She was only a few feet away from their orange home when the rain had started, and when it had, she laughed boisterously. Her anniversary days were always the worst for her, but, they always managed to make her feel giddy— giddy because that was the only way she could suppress the pain and anger that throbbed in her chest.
She walked by the ANBU guards to her mansion, continuing to soak in the rain. Neither of the guards said a word nor did they provide an umbrella or escort as they each knew what day it was. Talking or taking any action towards the Hokage's wife on this day didn't work. She was always wrapped up in her own little world.
She walked along the smooth, tiled path surrounded by the large, lush and fruitful gardens they had grown over the years. She was about to ascend the few steps to the door when her heel caught the hem of her dress, ripping the fine silk in half and exposing her bare thigh to the cold weather. She tripped up the steps, completely breaking both heels off her shoes.
She paused momentarily, allowing a giggle escape. Her hand reached for the doorknob, but the door opened on its own.
Oh yeah.
They never did lock their doors.
She left her broken shoes on the doorstep and entered the warmth of the living room. She left the door open, knowing that she would be using it later on tonight.
She knew she was making a mess on the beige carpet as she glided across the room but he could clean it up later on.
She staggered up the spiraling steps and down the grand halls until she stood before a large bedroom door. She could already predict what would be waiting for her in there. He would be fast asleep on the bed, his legs and the sheets sprawled in different directions, mewling like a little kitty in his sleep.
She flung the doors open, making sure they slammed against the wall loudly. As she expected, he didn't flinch nor stir. She knew his habits a bit too well.
Through the orange canopy she eyed his sleeping figure. He looked peaceful.
She moved towards him and joined him on the lavender sheets, crossing the large bed in order to be right by his side. There, she lay beside him, her eyes gazing at his closed ones.
Her drenched dress soaked the bed but she didn't care. His unruly blond hair lightly rested upon his tan face, covering bits of the three scars on his visible cheek. She noticed he hadn't stripped down to his boxers as he usually slept. He was still dressed in his Hokage robe.
She lightly sniffed him… He smelt like sake.
She ran her fingers through his hair and smiled. He smiled too.
Only he did this to her. Only he managed to hurt her so much that she couldn't fight against it. She couldn't bring herself to display anything but love towards her husband.
Normally when she was upset, which was rather seldom, she would tell him and they would always work it out. But their anniversary blunders… she could never bring herself to speak about. They always pretended to forget about it, like it didn't happen.
Well he did.
She usually kept the hurt stirred inside, but, as she ran her fingers through his hair one more time, she knew it couldn't be contained much longer. Every night she considered five little words and her response was always no. Tonight… there may be an exception.
"Naruto," she whispered, pulling her hand away from his hair.
As she expected, a wide foxy grin sketched itself upon his face as he snaked his arms around her waist and pulled her closer. She didn't move.
"Naruto," she whispered again.
The blonde's sapphire blue eyes lazily fluttered open then back shut, "Hm, Hina-chan?" His nose crinkled and his eyebrows furrowed, "Are you wet, Hinata?"
Hinata didn't answer. He would understand the situation like he always did in 3, 2, 1…
Naruto removed his hands from her waist and opened his eyes. His grin faded into a line and his face displayed worry. She looked like she'd been hit by a wave of death. "Is something wrong, Hinata?"
Hinata laughed and Naruto stiffened.
Something was definitely wrong. And he could tell he had something to do with it.
"Where were you at 8:00pm today, Naruto?" Hinata asked, her voice giggly.
"I was in the office, finishing up on some paperwork… Why?"
Hinata nodded. An imaginary knife pierced the skin above her heart area. She didn't answer his question. "What happened afterwards?"
Naruto clutched a fistful of the sheets. He did something wrong. Hinata wasn't answering him. "Kakashi-sensei and Yamato-sensei invited me for a drink. Why?"
Hinata nodded and smiled. The knife darted through the skin, only inches away from her heart. "When did your drinking session end?"
Naruto frowned, "About an hour later. Why?"
The knife tipped the outer skin of her heart. "Were you drunk?"
"Yes," he admitted as he nervously scratched the back of his head. "Kakashi-sensei and Yamato-sensei brought me home, I believe. Why?"
The knife plunged into the organ bit by bit. "Oh, just out of curiosity, when is our wedding anniversary date again?"
Naruto grinned, "You forgot? It's November 19th of course!"
Hinata smiled. The knife dug into the center of her heart.
"I didn't forget," Hinata whispered, her voice no longer giggly but serious. She dropped the charade so he could read her face. "What's today's date, Naruto?"
"November the 19- oh shit."
Hinata hung her head down, allowing her bangs to cover her eyes. The knife etched through her heart completely. A single tear rolled down her cheek.
"H-Hinata! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to-"
"Stop, Naruto."
"B-But I did-"
"I said stop it, Naruto!" Hinata yelled, revealing her tear streaked face. She rolled off the bed and stood stiffly. "Just stop it!"
Naruto got off the bed and ran to his wife's side. He was about to place a comforting hand on her shoulder when she swatted it away. "H-Hinata."
"Don't. Touch. Me."
The two stood there for a while, not moving or speaking but staring deeply into each other's eyes.
Hinata drew away first, wiping away her tears. "This is the fourth time Naruto! The fourth time!"
Naruto was about to embrace her but she backed away. "Hina-chan, I'm sure it's not the-"
Hinata laughed bitterly, "Ha! Don't give me that crap! We've been married for four years and you haven't managed to attend one of our wedding anniversaries! It's like you don't even care! The first time, I could excuse you. You had a mission. It wasn't your fault. The second time, I was upset. You blew me off because you lost track of time while training with Sasuke! The third time, hurt me for months. You… forgot about our wedding anniversary! You forgot, Naruto! You did! And now, I am learning that you got drunk with some friends and blew me off?"
"Hinata, I know-"
"No! You don't know!" Hinata cried. "Did you know that I was at the restaurant we agreed to go to just this morning! I actually thought you would show this time! I looked like a fool! I spent so much money and time, trying to make it all perfect for us! But as always, you ruined it! I've been hurting all this time and you just ignore it! You never address it! I can't keep it stored in anymore! Naruto, I just can't!"
Hinata broke into tears.
Naruto tried to touch her but she shoved him off.
"M-My father was right," she sobbed. "My sister was right! Neji was right! You're never going to be able to support me enough! I'm always thinking about you and your needs! For once... just once! I want to be selfish! I want to think about me and my needs! Needs you never fulfil! I-I know you're trying, trying so hard... but is it wrong to want you to try a little harder for one day a year? Huh, Naruto? Apparently, you can't! A-And that's why… N-Naruto… I … I w-want a… divorce." She wiped away her tears and looked him square in the eye, showing no hint of joking.
"You're kidding right!" Naruto yelled, his rage flaring. He gripped her bare shoulders and shook her, "This is a fucking joke! What are you saying?"
More tears streamed down her face. She pushed Naruto away and ran down the hall. She tumbled down the stairs and stumbled to the open door. She was... almost there. So close to freedom...
Naruto grabbed her from behind, unwilling to let her escape. He pushed her onto the couch and crushed her with his own body weight. "H-Hinata please! Tell me you didn't mean what you said!"
Hinata struggled and tried to free herself, but Naruto wouldn't budge. "I want a divorce! I'm not putting up with this anymore!"
A crazed look entered Naruto's blue eyes. "But you can't leave me!" he shouted. "You promised me! You said we'd always be together! You promised that you'll never leave me!"
"Promises are m-meant to be broken, Naruto."
"Hinata, please! I can't live without you! I need you! I might be an idiot! I can be an ass! I may be the dumbest person in the world! But there is one thing that I do know for certain! And that is, that I love you! Hinata, I love you!"
Hinata stopped her struggles and cupped his face with her hands. "And you don't think I love you? It hurts, Naruto, it hurts. It hurts too much."
Naruto's tears released onto hers. "Please, let's just talk about this," he whispered, "We'll work through it… Like we always do."
Hinata shook her head. "I'm sorry Naruto…. But I'm already gone, and I've been gone for a while now… Just... accept it..."
Naruto smiled somberly. "No, Hinata. You're not already gone. I haven't lost you. That's because I love you and I know you love me. We'll make it work. I know we will. I will do whatever it takes to get you back. I will do whatever it takes to earn your trust. Even if it kills me, I'll find a way to do it from my grave. I will."
He crashed his lips onto hers in a strong, needy kiss. She resisted his lips but he pressed on harder until she gave in. She kissed him back just as strong, drawing her arms around his neck. Tears rolled down their cheeks as the kisses were shared. And as their lips were connected, a mutual understanding passed by the both of them. They needed each other. They completed each other. And they loved each other too much to let go. Clothes began to shed and bodies interacted.
No matter how many times she could argue with him, no matter how many times he hurt her, she'd always come back. And he knew that.