Set at the end of book three, but we're pretending that Azula recovered from her insanity. But it explains the Amber Bracelet situation in 'Behind the Lies' a lot broader. But this is a STAND-ALONE-FIC – none of this has anything to do with 'Behind the Lies'; just the original idea came from that story… ok, honestly the most random thing I've come up with! But I was bored, so get over it… and I'm sorry if you think people are out of character. Well, enjoy! R&R
Dedicated to the victims of the Black Saturday fires, still burning in Victoria. Death toll, last time I checked, is 210... ok, it'll probably be more by now, but it's still a big number.
Life Goes On…
Azula looked up as footsteps approached her cell. She half expected to see a guard, but was surprised to see her own brother instead.
"What do you want?" she sighed.
"I'm the one taking you for a walk today," he explained simply.
"I thought you said that I wasn't allowed out of my cell unless I was with a guard," she reminded him reproachfully.
"Well, either a guard or me," he informed her, slightly reproachful himself.
Azula sighed and rolled her eyes as she stood up and Zuko unlocked her cell. He could almost swear that his sister was turning into Mai with the amount of gloominess she had been exposing since she had been imprisoned.
Zuko calmly tied her hands together behind her back with some soft rope. He didn't need to worry about her firebending; she had been drugged so that she couldn't bend.
He led her out of the prison and into the main body of the palace to the foyer at the entrance, where Mai, Ty Lee, Katara, Iroh, Sokka, Aang, Toph and Suki were all standing.
"Alright, here she is," he announced his little sister, who, once again, rolled her eyes.
"Hi," she greeted her new company.
They all mumbled their hesitant, uncertain replies.
"Now, why am I here? Did you all want to see me or something?" she asked, the question directed at her brother.
"Not really. Aang just wanted to see how you were doing; he never really got a chance to see you after you cracked. The others were a bit curious too, but not as much as Aang," the new Fire Lord shrugged.
"Whatever."
"Ok, now that we've all seen her, can she go back to her prison cell now, please?" Sokka asked cautiously.
"No, Sokka, she has to be let out to walk about every now and then or her legs are gonna drop off!" Ty Lee jittered.
The Water Tribe boy sighed, "But we only wanted to see how she was doing."
"Sokka, get over it," Suki almost giggled, causing Ty Lee to slump her shoulders slightly.
"But what if she tries to fry Aang again?!"
"I can't. I've been drugged so that I can't firebend, Dumb-Dumb," Azula spat.
"Hey! Stop giving people that nickname. It's bad enough that you call me Dumb-Dumb! At least I knew it wasn't true. But saying it to someone who it actually applies to is mean," Zuko nudged her.
"Hey!" Sokka cried indignantly.
"Stop your complaining, Sokka," Katara giggled as she poked him in the side of the ribs, causing him to jump and shiver violently.
"Hey, stop –"
"Guys, if we're gonna argue, can we please at least start moving?" Toph asked with Aang nodding approvingly at her side.
"Sounds like a plan!" Iroh smiled.
"Whatever," Mai shrugged.
They all started walking in the same general direction, up a corridor, towards the west wing of the palace.
As Katara and Sokka continued their own argument, Aang came up to Azula's side.
"So… what have you been doing all day when you aren't walking about?" he asked, eager to make some sort of conversation in order to block out the fighting Water siblings.
The Princess shrugged, "Really, I just sleep most of the time because I'm so bored. I make some pretty funny looking shadow puppets on the wall when the sun shines through the window in the afternoons." She quickly silenced herself, shocked on having admitted to such childish doings.
"You do what?" Zuko asked in disbelief.
"Oh, come on! It's not as if you never did stupid things like that," she cringed.
"Uh, not recently. Not since I was a kid," he shot back.
"So, what did you guys use to do around here when you were kids?" Aang asked as Azula glared back at her brother. He didn't want them to fight as well, not right now.
"None of your business, Arrow Head!" she snapped.
"Hey, would you stop with the name calling?!"
"Why should I, Zuzu? It's so fun!" she said psychotically.
Zuko glared at her for a moment. She was about to say something else when Ty Lee cut across her.
"Hey, guys, where exactly are we in the palace right now? This place looks kinda familiar, but I don't remember ever being here…"
Everyone stopped and looked around. Sure enough, Azula, Zuko, Iroh and Mai vaguely recognized the area as well.
"Well, we are in the west wing. Dad barely ever let us up here," Azula thought out loud.
"And for a good reason…" Iroh mumbled, his head slightly bowed.
"Why? I do remember coming here a few times… but I just can't remember what was happening. But I know we had adults with us a fair bit," Mai informed everyone in her usual bored tone.
"Never mind why. Just come on, let's all go," Iroh turned and tried to convince the others to go back with him. But he caught sight of his niece and nephew giving him a seriously, we lived here, we should know where we are sort of look.
"Come on; let's go take a bit of a look around!" Ty Lee decided as she bounded to the front of the group and started leading the way.
The others all shrugged and followed her with a slight hesitation.
At the end of the corridor they were in, there was a single flight of stairs going up into one of the wing rooms. They all had to go in single file up the stairs and they all waited for each other to catch up before going into the only room with access from the area they came out onto.
Ty Lee pushed open the single, heavy, stone door and stepped curiously into the room. Her companions gathered in the doorway, slightly more hesitant. When Ty Lee did not go any further into the room, Azula stepped forward, her brow furrowed.
"This place looks… so familiar…" she thought out loud.
"I'm not surprised; you spent almost three weeks of you childhood in here," Iroh grumbled, eyes downcast.
"Uncle?" Zuko asked, "what is this place?"
Mai gasped and for the smallest of seconds, her face was full of emotion. It quickly changed back to the usual neutral expression as she spoke for Iroh, "Don't you recognize it?"
Zuko cocked an eyebrow as he turned to face back into the room where Azula and Ty Lee were standing, looking more confused than ever.
Azula moved right into the room and started walking around. There were two beds, their sheets crinkled and dusty. Each bed had a battered, old, ripped curtain opened around it and there was a single window at the far end of the room, allowing the sun to spill in and make shadows from the dust and curtains dance all over the stone walls and flagstone floor. It was surely the oldest room in the palace – or at least the least updated – and it looked so very familiar to the firebender woman.
Azula looked at the first bed, closest to the door and was almost sure she could see herself lying there, but not as the person she was now. An image of her six-year-old self in that bed was imprinted on the inside of her eyelids for a moment and she had to blink to get rid of it.
Why did I just see that?
She looked over to the other bed on the far side of the room and, without needing to take a second glance, she could see a pale girl, about nine-years-old, with hair the same black as hers and with a face that looked almost the same as hers, lying, with one skinny arm hanging out of the bed, limply, as three doctors checked her for a pulse or any other sign of life. But there was no life in the body of the girl. The girl was dead.
And with a searing pain of grief flooding her, Azula realized exactly who that girl was. And with that memory, all of the other memories of that room, what it was, when she had been in it before, what had happened in it, came back to her.
Reality caught up to Azula as she tried to blink away the image before her. She screamed as she turned away from the bed and covered her eyes as salty tears stung them and tumbled down her cheeks.
She squeezed her amber eyes shut as tightly as she could, until the image of the girl in the bed left her and she opened them again to face her present companions, who were all looking at her in confusion.
She straightened up, not daring to look back at the bed, and walked out of the room and started heading down the stairs again.
"Azula? Where are you going?! What's wrong?!" Zuko asked, concern edging his voice, mingled with curiosity; he had figured out that she remembered where they were.
"I'm sorry," she whispered as she stopped on the staircase, "I just can't stay in here…"
"Why not?" Ty Lee and Zuko asked at the same time.
"Take a proper look and you'll see," she told them as she bit her bottom lip and sat down on the step she was standing on.
Cocking his eyebrow, Zuko stepped into the room and looked around. He admitted to himself that he had definitely been in here before and his gut told him that the memories of this room were better left forgotten, but Zuko had to know what this room was. He had to know what in the world could make his sister suddenly just fall apart like that.
He looked around the room and in the first bed near the door, he could almost see a younger version of Azula lying there. The six-year-old Azula was so pale he could have mistaken her for a porcelain doll. She lay there, looking at him with wide eyes.
Zuko blinked and the image was gone, just a figure of his imagination. But in the back of his mind, he remembered when his sister had been like that.
He turned to the second bed and with a single flash of a nine-year-old, lying there, looking at him with the same wide eyes that his sister had, he remembered everything. What had happened, who this other girl was, what was wrong with them, what happened to them. He remembered it all only too well. And as he turned away, he knew exactly why Azula couldn't stand being in this room.
And again, but not for the first or last time, he desperately wished that he'd taken his uncle's advice.
He turned away from the beds, not willing his imagination to see what he knew Azula would have seen.
"Uncle…" he sighed, as he tried to blink back the tears, "why couldn't you just have told us?"
"I didn't want to have to recall it myself," the elderly man admitted.
Zuko sighed and was about to walk out of the room when Mai pointed something out.
"I thought those curtains around the back bed are meant to be closed."
Zuko unwillingly turned back to see that Mai was right; the bed that the nine-year-old girl had once lain in should not have been in view. He trudged over to the bed and quickly pulled the curtains around it, hiding it from sight.
Taking a deep breath, Zuko left the room and went to start heading down the stairs. He passed Azula and she stood up and followed him away, "Come on, guys," he gestured without turning back, "let's go."
"Wait… what happened?" Aang asked, looking between the two leaving firebenders, Iroh, Mai and Ty Lee.
Azula and Zuko stopped, "If you want to know, get someone else to tell you, but let us leave first," Azula indicated between herself and Zuko as she informed Aang in a shaky voice.
After a moment Zuko and Azula disappeared from view and the Avatar and his older friends turned to their newer ones in confusion, "What happened here that could make them both so sad so suddenly?" Katara asked.
Iroh bit his lip and bowed his head and Mai and Ty Lee looked between each other.
"This is where Lien died," Mai explained, emotion bordering her voice.
"Who's Lien?" Sokka asked.
"My niece," Iroh explained, "Zuko and Azula's older sister."
Aang, Sokka, Suki, Toph and Katara all gasped.
"They have an older sister?!" Sokka asked in disbelief.
Iroh nodded.
"No," Ty Lee corrected them, "had, past tense. Lien died, as Mai said." The acrobat's voice trembled a lot as she spoke.
"What happened?" Toph asked sympathetically. She could tell this was going to be a heartbreaking tale.
"Iroh…" Ty Lee looked at the man.
"I couldn't say it… one of you do it."
The circus girl looked to Mai.
She sighed, "Well, about ten years ago, maybe a little longer, Azula, Lien and Zuko were all best friends. But… it was just two weeks before Azula's sixth birthday and… she and Lien got really sick with penta-pox fever," Mai explained.
"Penta-pox fever?!" Katara gasped, knowing only too well of the fatal illness.
"Yes," Ty Lee nodded.
"They both got moved in here… that's why there are two beds. They were moved in here because it was so close to where the doctors were, so they could tend to them as soon as they needed them. But, of course, penta-pox fever is not something that is easy to get rid of, even thought it isn't contagious," Mai explained.
"Azula, if I remember right, was in the bed closer to the door," Ty Lee indicated to the first bed, "and Lien was in the other one. Zuko came in here and sat in between them every day for as long as he could, trying to make them feel better and stop them from getting bored."
"Then, one day, the doctors told their parents that both of the girls were going to die, and Zuko overheard it. They said that they expected Azula to die that night. They had both been sick with the penta-pox for about a week by then which meant that it was only a week before Azula's sixth birthday. When Zuko found out, he was devastated for both of them, and that afternoon, Lien told him to go and sit with Azula so that he could enjoy being with her as much as he could before she left them. So he did and… well…"
"Zuko had already gotten Azula her birthday present; an amber bracelet. They're a charm for good health and it's a tradition to exchange them. Azula had been wanting one for a while, because they were really pretty so Zuko had gone and got her one. He was going to give it to her on her sixth birthday… but he gave it to her right there and then because she was about to die."
"He slipped it onto her wrist and… well, Lien told us what happened when we went to see her the next day. In her words, Azula smiled at him and then… there was a light breeze that came in through the window and it kinda took her life as it passed over them. She just let go of her breath and fell limp in her bed, and she was dead. After that, Zuko started crying – of course, Lien did too, but not as hard because of how weak she already was. But the bracelet kinda sparked up for a second and all the beads lit up… just for a moment. Zuko noticed it as well and he stopped crying and then Azula just woke up… just like that. Two days later she was feeling better than ever and was able to leave the room and carry on with her normal life," Mai retold the story.
"Well, normal except for the fact that Lien was still sick," Ty Lee butt in, "they visited her all the time in here and it looked like she was starting to get better, really slowly. And then the doctors said that she was going to pull through. But… one day, a day before Azula's birthday, Ursa –"
"Who?" Suki cut Ty Lee off.
"Ursa, Zuko, Azula and Lien's mother," she explained.
"Ursa told Zuko and Azula to go and play outside for while. It had been really dull outside lately and that afternoon it all suddenly lit up. They had spent all day with Lien and they agreed that they needed to spend some time outside of the building. So, they went outside just as the sun was starting to set and hung out. Lien was fine when they left; she was at the half way mark to a full recovery. But… no one knows why…" Mai trailed off.
"The next thing Azula and Zuko knew, their mother was coming up to them in the garden in tears… and… she told them… no one knew why she died… but she told them Lien was dead…" Ty Lee sobbed as tears poured out of her big eyes.
Ty Lee shook her head to tell them that she could not go on and Mai took over once again.
"They… they didn't want to believe Ursa… no one did… she didn't want to believe herself… Zuko and Azula ran back here; they had to see it for themselves before they could believe it. They didn't want to give up all of their hope," Mai paused for a moment as she tried to calm herself, "she managed to stop Zuko before he could get in here… he was just at the bottom of the stairs…"
Mai couldn't continue and for the first time in what seemed like forever, an emotional Iroh spoke up, "But she did not stop Azula in time. My younger niece ran up here and into the room to see Lien, skin as white as snow with lack of life, eyes shut in an endless sleep, lying perfectly limp, unnaturally still, the doctors quietly trying to find any sign that would tell them that she had not passed on. But they couldn't find any sign of life in Lien's body… and Azula knew it," he began to sob.
There was almost silence except for the sobbing of the old man.
Mai was the one to break the silence, "Azula had nightmares for ages after that… I still remember the way that Zuko could hear her crying from the bottom of the stair, but his mother wouldn't let him up… she didn't want him to see it too. She had to make Ozai and Iroh hold him back while she went to get her. She was hysterical for ages after that. Azula didn't leave her room for three days, and when she did, she refused to talk to Zuko for at least a month."
"Azula blamed Zuko for Lien's death… as well as, sometimes, herself," Ty Lee added, "because she thinks that the bracelet really did have some magic in it… and it saved her and she thinks that if Zuko had given one to Lien as well… she wouldn't have died."
"So, ever since then, Azula hasn't been able to come up here. Ozai made the place off limits to everyone… he even relocated the doctors. And since then, she has forced herself to hate Zuko. And every now and then, he starts believing that it really was his fault and he asks himself, what if? What if I had given Lien a bracelet? What if I had given it to Lien in stead of Azula? What if I hadn't given a bracelet to either of them? What if it really was my fault that Lien died?" Mai cried, "and it really gets him down."
"They haven't reflected on this for years and they've tried their best to forget about it completely… but I guess that that sort of thing is just something that you can never, truly get rid of," Ty Lee chocked back a sob.
"Oh, poor Zuko… poor Azula…" Suki sighed as she understood the situation.
"I feel sorry for Lien; how would you feel to be told that you're going to die and then that you're getting better and then just suddenly die anyways?! But, yea, I guess it would have hurt Zuko and Azula more," Sokka shrugged.
"I feel so sorry for Azula! She actually went up and saw Lien's dead body," Katara gasped, "of course she would have gotten nightmares!"
"And poor Zuko! I mean, it's not his fault his sister died. And I feel sorry for Azula for blaming herself for it as well and then making herself hate him!" Aang almost yelled.
Everyone was silent for a moment. Ty Lee was the first to speak again, "Lien was a good person. I miss her heaps."
"We all do, Ty Lee," Iroh assured her and Mai nodded.
Katara was the next one to break the silence, "I think I'm going to go and check on Zuko. I don't think I've ever seen him that depressed, not even when he was worried about getting you to forgive him, Iroh," she explained.
"Go and talk to him; I'm sure you can make him feel better."
Katara nodded and walked off to find the recently made Fire Lord. She found him sitting near the turtle-duck pond in the gardens, all on his own.
She walked over to him and sat down with him.
"Mai and Ty Lee told us what happened," she spoke.
He shrugged helplessly, "I just don't get it," he whispered, "she was fine when we left the room, but two hours later she was dead."
Tears trickled down his cheeks and Katara whipped them away with her thumb.
"It'll be alright. Zuko, listen," she gently put a hand to one side of his head and made him face her, "everyone dies in the end. No one lives forever. And sometimes, people don't live as long as we think they should because things happen. People get sick and have accidents. But it's not something we can control. People die, Zuko, but life goes on, and we need to move on and forget the past."
He looked into her eyes for a moment and then looked away from her.
"You don't understand; it was my fault. I could have saved her, just like I saved Azula," Zuko whispered.
"That's not true. Zuko, Azula didn't survive by magic, it was mere luck and coincidence. Lien just wasn't as lucky."
Zuko didn't seem convinced about this. He continued to stare out over the pond, tears streaming down his cheeks, slowly.
Katara weaved her arm around one of his and pulled herself up to him.
He felt his heart miss a beat as he turned to face her in confusion.
"Katara, what are you –?"
"Zuko, please stop being all gloomy. Mai is bad enough, please, not you too," he pleaded softly, her lips at his ear.
"Katara…"
The wide eyed Fire Lord looked breathlessly at the waterbender. She always knew how to make him feel better, even in the most random ways and at the darkest of times.
"Zuko, please don't blame yourself for it. It wasn't your fault that Lien died. I can help you make Azula see this too," she promised him as their faces moved closer and closer.
And their lips met in one, long, deep, passionate, gentle, kiss. And all of Zuko's worries flooded out of him and were replaced with comfort and a new light.
They slowly drifted apart and Zuko smiled at her, "What about Aang?" he asked nervously.
Katara sighed, "He's more like a little brother to me than anything else. But what about Mai?"
"I guess it's just not suppose to be… I always knew there was something missing between us… I guess I know what it is now; she doesn't comfort or heal and I guess I just don't really love her as much as I thought I did," he decided.
There was silence for a moment. "Where's Azula?"
"She asked me to take her back to her cell. I think I should go and talk to her," Zuko said.
"Do you want me to come with you?"
Zuko shrugged, "Suit yourself."
He got up and headed to the prison and to his little sister's cell. Katara followed behind him and kept quiet as they entered the corridor her cell was in.
She was sitting against the wall, on her bed, right where the sunlight was pouring in through the window, and she was fingering at something on her wrist; an amber bracelet.
"I guess some people just aren't always as lucky as others," she said, breaking the silence as she looked up to where Zuko and Katara were standing, "what can I say?"
"What do you mean? How long have you been wearing that thing?" Zuko tilted his head to the side in curiosity.
After a long pause, Azula answered, "I never took it off."
Zuko felt his heart sink into his stomach as he realized what that meant; she never really stopped loving him.
"I'm sorry, Zuko. I shouldn't have blamed you… I just… I was just so upset and confused and angry and hurt… I just let my thoughts cloud my judgment… and I made a mistake," she admitted.
A small smile appeared on Zuko's face as he stepped forward to unlock her cell and he slipped inside to join her.
Katara smiled as Azula jumped off the bed and ran to hug her brother tightly, sobbing into his shoulder.
"I was just so lost without her, Zuko… I just didn't know what to do…"
"It's ok, it doesn't matter anymore. I was lost as well and it made me make some pretty bad choices, but that was in the past; we can move on."
"Oh, Zuko, will you ever forgive me?" the former princess cried desperately.
Zuko pulled her back off him and she silenced herself in shock for a moment, thinking that he was rejecting her. But as she looked at his face she realized he was smiling welcomingly.
"Of course I will forgive you, Azula. You're my baby sister, I'd do anything to have you back," he whispered to her.
Katara smiled widely at the scene as she felt tears of happiness come to her eyes.
Azula's watery eyes seemed to smile as much as her lips did as she wrapped her arms tightly around Zuko and the Fire Lord hugged her back.
"Thank you…" she whispered.
Katara slowly and quietly slipped away. She knew that things would work out alright, but now, it was time for them to spend some time alone.
Life goes on and we need to let go of the past.
Lien is Chinese for Lotus. Hey, I didn't use a Japanese name this time :)
Past, present, future. Yesterday is past, it's all history. Tomorrow is the future and it's a mystery. Today is a gift, that's why it's called the present. We live and we die but life goes on and we need to learn to let go and stop lingering on the past. I just thought that would be a good moral story, especially for anyone who has lost someone in the bushfires over in Australia, so I thought I'd share it with you. XD
Ok folks, happy-sappy time is over. I just had to write this to get it outta my system. Now, leave a review and tell me what you thought and then get lost. Lol, kidding! I love you guys… I really do… I love you guys…