Luffy's Harem

Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece, 'nuff said.

A/N: This is a total crack fic that I woke up this morning and couldn't get out of my head. Hope you get a laugh or two out of it, cheers!

-+ Zoro +-

"Hey! You are Zoro right?"

"Yeah? What do you want?"

"I like you! Will you marry me?"

"…WHAT?"

"I want you to be with me!"

"NO! Leave me alone…"

"Na, if I get your swords for you and release you, you will marry me right? Ok, that's a promise, wait for me!"

"Hey I didn't promise you anything!"

-+ Nami + -

"Nami, do you know how to navigate?"

"Of course! Who do you think you are talking to?"

"That's great! So, will you marry me?"

"What the hell are you talking about!"

"Well, if you marry me, we will be together right? Don't worry, I will protect you from Arlong! Guys, let's go defeat the fishmen now!"

"Hey listen to me when I'm talking to you! Idiot!"

-+ Sanji +-

"Wow Sanji , you are a really good cook!"

"Stop chattering and go serve the customers! You need to work off the debt from damaging the Baratie! Oh Nami-swan! You are here again, the goddess of the sea, and love of my heart! Let me serve you with this special dessert I prepared especially for you!"

"I want you to cook for us everyday Sanji, marry me!"

"Idiot, I am only interested in girls, especially pretty ones like Nami."

"Oh, Nami's married to me, so if you marry me, that means you marry her too! Let's be together forever ok?"

"… I can marry Nami?"

"Yeah! And I plan to get more people I like to marry too!"

"You mean you will get more girls to be in this harem?"

"Harem?"

"To marry you… or us, in this case."

"Sure! The more the merrier!"

"… ok I'm in."

- Asking Luffy -

"Luffy, why did you asked us to marry you, when you only wanted us to join your crew?"

"Huh? Doesn't it mean the same? I like marriage better, it sounds more permanent, and Makino told me I should do it with people I like, and I like all of you!"

"What did Makino say to you?"

"Oh, she said that one day, when I grow up, I will meet someone I like, someone I will want to be with forever, and I will protect, trust, and honor that person till death do us part. She also said the person I marry will do the same for me too, isn't that great!"

"I'm almost afraid to ask…but…did anyone explain to you about sex?"

"What's that? Can I eat it?"

"…"