Shall I stay? Would it be a sin? If I can't help falling in love with you…
"Are you sure no one will notice?"
"For once I'm not the guest of honor at a party, I want to take advantage of it."
Asami and Korra were a good distance from the reception now, on the other side of the island where the din of partygoers still reached but the glow of the lights was obscured. The night sky was particularly starlit tonight, despite the brightness of the full moon.
"What's that legend?" Asami said, following after Korra. "About the Water Tribe princess who became the Moon Spirit?"
"It's not a legend, it's true. Princess Yue was my grandfather's cousin and she was Aang's friend."
Asami just smiled up at the moon and she was sure she felt the princess smile back. She felt protected, perhaps it's how the Water Tribe felt under their patron Spirit. Her eyes then fell on the back of Korra's head as she opened the door to the living quarters. And she felt another tumble in her stomach as she remembered how brazen and quick they'd been to get up and decide to leave. Not just the party, but for days, weeks perhaps.
In the Spirit World. With the Avatar.
Alone. With Korra.
She stepped into the hall behind Korra and made for her room while Korra quickly ducked into hers. In her own room, Asami quickly worked at freeing herself from her complicated dress. She recalled the days when she helped dress a version of Korra who couldn't even feel her legs. She wondered now if Korra might return the favor by taking care of the particularly illogically placed zipper that was no doubt designed to be pulled down by another.
Half dressed, she shuffled across the hall and knocked.
"Come in," Korra called.
She was practically bouncing from the walls, packing random clothes and rolling a blanket to shove into a ready to burst bag. She was back in her normal clothes, mostly, boots were still missing and so was her fur pelt. She looked up with a bright smile.
"Do you think you could…" she trailed off and turned her back, pointing.
Asami heard no response from Korra but felt a pair of hands graze her back and she nearly jumped. Korra's hands were shaking as they pulled the zipper down and they were incredibly warm. It's the Firebending, Asami thought. Mako's hands had been warm too. And the sensation she got now was not entirely different from that one.
Asami was not an idiot. She may not want to admit it, but at the end of the day and through all the battles and the pain she knew what her feelings were. She wasn't sure when it happened, yesterday, the day before, 3 years earlier. At some point something snapped—no, not snapped. Something shifted gently like a wave setting down driftwood.
It scared her, that she felt something like this for Korra. She told no one and hiding it was not difficult. What was difficult was keeping away from Korra, she sought her out, sometimes with tea at sunset sometimes with a made up excuse to get her alone. She needed to be near her, just to talk or just to look at her. It was selfish but a part of her liked that too.
Korra was buried under her skin so deep it would be pain unnumbered to remove her.
So she let it happen.
"Thanks," she mumbled, catching the fabric of her dress before it dropped too low.
Korra didn't say anything and Asami didn't feel her move. She turned around and Korra was looking right at her. Her expression was soft but she was not looking at Asami, she was thinking about her, though. Blue eyes traveled the length of her face and back again she felt it heat where her eyes went not unlike Kuvira's Spirit gun.
"What?" Asami said.
Korra seemed to be running an internal dialogue with herself. The topic of which became obvious when her eyes betrayed her, flicking low on her face for just a second but long enough to read her mind.
"You can, if you want to."
It came out faster than Asami had time to stop it. She decided she didn't care, despite the quickened heartbeat. Korra was wide-eyed and reddening.
"What?" Korra said.
"Korra."
Asami sighed and sat down on the bed, still gripping tightly to her loose fabric. They should of definitely had this conversation before she got undressed. Would it be too awkward to ask her to re-zip her?
No. No distractions. They were doing this now. She could handle Korra not feeling the same way, she could stand if only she was allowed to continue to be near her. But she needed to know and needed to hear it.
"Why did you ask me to do this with you?"
"Why did you make up an excuse to make Tenzin leave?"
That, Asami had not expected. Korra was sharper than she gave herself credit for. And she smiled, despite the heaviness in the air, despite the awkwardness, and the tension and despite barely holding her dress up.
"Because," Korra continued. "I—I hoped you did that for the same reason I did."
Asami's smile only grew wider.
"Which is…?"
"Why do I have to be the one to say it?"
Asami actually laughed at that, though Korra looked annoyed and confused. She was a child whenever she wasn't the wisest person Asami ever met. And she loved that in her, a 10,000 year old toddler. And she was the most selfless person she'd ever met, and very much the bravest, except perhaps in this, but it required a different type of courage. Korra was hotheaded and blunt and rarely thought things threw. She was imperfect.
But to Asami she was beautiful.
"If your saying what I think you're saying," Asami said. "Why me?"
Korra's brow furrowed, her annoyance remained but it was directed elsewhere now. She now truly was looking at Asami, right into her eyes. Was it judgment? Was it anger?
"Why are you asking me this?" she said.
"Because Korra," Asami said, looking down. "You're the Avatar. I know what I was to you when we first met Korra, a rich city girl. I don't really have much going for me."
"Asami." There they were again, they warm hands, this time on her own. "You're the most intelligent person I've ever met. And you're a lot of other things and…It's hard I guess. Saying exactly why."
"I think that's how you know it's real," Asami said. "When you don't know why you feel it."
"When what's real?"
"Please stop playing dumb, Korra."
At her side, Korra's head dropped and her eyes went to her bootless feet. Her still bruised hands twiddled in the air beneath her legs while her elbows rested on her knees. Was it fair, Asami wondered, to force Korra to admit something Asami herself couldn't open her mouth to say? They were both playing a game to see who would do it first, Asami had made an opening move in cornering Korra, who in turn invited her to run away with her, if only for a while.
If someone didn't do something they'd be dancing around the truth forever, afraid to touch it because of what it could mean.
"You saw me when I was nothing," Korra whispered. "And you didn't look through me."
Asami was on her knees, resting her hand on Korra's own while one still grasped her dress. She dipped her head until she met Korra's eyes and then lead her gaze up to raise her head.
"You were never nothing," Asami.
"I couldn't even get to the bathro—"
"Not to me."
"Why?"
"Why does anyone feel this way about anyone, Korra?"
Korra was shaking again at the proximity, her face pale instead of red. Her eyes flashed low again but Asami refused to move. She'd come as far as she was willing, Korra had to do the rest. And it seemed the Avatar understood that because her eyes were going between Asami's own and her lips.
And Korra leaned forward. Asami watched the entire time, watched Korra's eyes close and her own didn't follow suit until their lips were firmly flush and then the lids closed slowly in time with her exhale.
It lasted only a few seconds. But it was real.
When Asami's eyes eventually opened Korra was already looking at her, a hair's breath away. She watched her tongue slide out quickly over her lips and back in, unconsciously to clean lipstick away.
"I really wish that hadn't happened while my clothes are about to fall off," Asami said and Korra laughed.
Asami stood and butterflies did dances in her stomach. She mumbled something about wanting to get changed, for real this time, and left. Once in her own room, with the door shut, she leaned back against it and smiled, bright and only for herself.
It hadn't been scary at all. It had been warm and it had been kind and it had been patient and she wanted to do it again as soon as possible. So she finally dropped her dress and changed.
When Korra go bored waiting she sat on Asami's bed and watched her pack.
"What's the weather like in the Spirit World?" Asami said, holding up two jackets. "Is it cold or…?"
"No, it isn't cold or hot," Korra said, absently balancing a marble above her hand with puffs of air. "It just kind of…is."
"Great, I'll bring my just is jacket."
Korra snorted and tossed the marble at her. Asami rolled her eyes and hid her smile in her closet as she reached for another jacket.
"Do we need to bring food?" Asami said.
"No, you won't be hungry there," Korra said. "And besides, there's someone I want you to meet who will give you more tea than you could ever drink."
When they left the house, the sounds of the party had died considerably and they were careful not to be spotted. Asami, for one, was happy not to be staying on the island during Varrick's wedding night. She did not envy everyone their mental scarring and ear aches. Korra left a note in the bison stable and they hurried to the ferry.
The bay was glassy at night, reflecting its namesake above. She watched Korra's fingers dance nonchalantly over the railing and odd ripples appeared in the water below. They danced across the water in time with the ferry like invisible sticks dragged the surface.
Asami grew up with stories of the Avatar, like they all did. She wondered if this was how Katara felt once, shocked at the twist of fate that lead her to the Avatar, surprised at just how far she would go to protect the person beneath the title. She forgot often, what Korra was capable of, forgot her true name that Vaatu shouted, forgot that elements yielded to her and kings bowed. The eternal Spirit of light and peace…
And she was just Korra. Forceful, arrogant, kind, and selfless Korra. Just the Water Tribe girl from the South with an uncanny ability to make a friend out of anyone she met. Perhaps that was the reason Korra chose her, Mako had felt inferior to her powers, Bolin was in awe of them. Asami rarely saw them.
She wanted Korra, just Korra. And if Korra let her, she'd keep her as long as she was able.
She wasn't sure who grabbed whose hand first. But neither one was letting get as they stepped through the light and into some brave new world.