This was a spur of the moment idea that came to mind. I just want to write it down and see where it goes… let me know what you guys think, if you like, etc. it'll get a lot better. This is just the intro chapter. Thanks!

It was the weekend before Christmas, and officially the start of the holiday season. It was Friday, leaving exactly 7 days, one week, until Christmas. I knew almost better than anyone else that meant really only 5 days for everyone to finish shopping. I could feel an electric buzz around. I could sense it in the crowds of people that gathered at my mall. Well, you know, not technically my mall- but my mall. As in the mall I worked at.

It was a nice outdoor shopping center that held mainly upscale shops and catered to the tastes of the wealthier population of the city. I couldn't say I was completely comfortable with everyone that walked through these courtyards, or even at ease at all the stores and boutiques here… but at least it was a nice environment. I at least had to give it to them that it was well kept, proper, polite, and professional. As an employee I had never felt I had any reason to really dislike my job. Snobby customers who came in were easy to ignore. But- not to make hasty generalizations- not everyone was like that. A majority of the people I helped in my store were just as gracious and polite as any.

My store. Shall I tell you what store I work at? Can I tell you first how clumsy I am? How sometimes insecure and shy I can get? That I easily blush? And not to mention, it isn't a rarity that I take a second look at myself and ask why am I even here? The answer is because although I still contain those flaws, those doubts within myself, they are nothing compared to the girl I was in high school. I have grown and matured since then. I am now a fairly content, easy going woman. My insecurities are kept in check. I'm a better, nobler person. I'm a work in progress- and how far that progress has come astounds me. If you had told me, junior year in high school I'd be a sales lady here- of all places- I would've madly blushed and said you were mistaken.

Let's see…. My store.

It contains a woman's name- with 'Secret' attached at the end of the title. You know the one. Don't make me say it.

I sell lingerie for a living. I work in a woman's underwear store- to put it simply. Our store carries bras and panties from everyday wear to… not so everyday wear. We're just what you're looking for if you're in need of something appropriate for an encounter of the intimate kind. We also have plenty of lotions, perfumes, body sprays, make up, signature scents, pajamas, our own line of underwear and sweaters and sweat pants aimed towards teens all in the name of the color 'Pink.'

So after all that, do you know what store I work at?

If not that's okay. Just know it deals with a lot of lacy feminine things geared towards feeling sexy and confident. Not to mention, your husband might like it if you brought a few purchases home to try out.

So currently, here I stood, folding boy shorts style underwear, as customers casually passed by, in and out through the open doors of our store. The glass doors were held open, welcoming shoppers for this holiday season. The girls and I, my co-workers, that is, came in a little earlier to put up new sale signs and put up the special holiday displays. Currently, I was the only one standing out front on the sales floor. The others worked the cashiers or in the fitting room area, one other was a sales greeter by the entrance.

I folded hurriedly, occasionally looking up, gazing through the open doors to look out at the rest of the mall and people passing who weren't coming in. I didn't know why- but I kept looking for a particular customer I had helped the other day. We had spoken on the phone, he was looking for something particular for his girlfriend. He was a funny guy. Lately I had been working a lot which caused work to lose its charm. The fun was wearing thin and with the busy holiday shopping season here work began to feel more like… well, work. But customers like him made it fun again. Unlike other customers we usually helped, they talked to you like a person. Capable of small talk and meaningless banter to pass the time and make the sales exchange at least pleasant since we were all still human. Working in the retail business, I've seen how people forget we're actually people. Do you think we want to be stuck here? For hours for our paycheck? Well no, so let's try to make the best of it. I sound like I'm complaining, and I guess I am, but it's just the mood I've been in lately.

So as I folded, I kept looking for a big burly man- that's how I had pictured the voice anyway. I cursed myself too, because I had already forgotten his first name- I only remembered a last name, because I had forgotten a last name like that even existed. Cullen. He promised he would stop in soon, because lingerie he insisted would be the best gift not only for his girlfriend, but in return, for himself when you think about it…

My view of the cold outside was interrupted by a short, vibrant figure entering my line of sight. My eyes switched focus to what was in front of me. I saw Alice come into view. She was wearing black- as we all were- which made her look trimmer than what she already was. A pencil skirt hugged her hips, forming well, as was the rest of her outfit and coat. she nearly danced over to me in her heels, making her three inches taller than what she was.

"Alice, I thought you said you were going on your lunch break…" I almost growled.

"I did." she defended chirpily.

"Then why are you holding a bag from the Apple Store? Lunch breaks don't usually consist of buying an iPod." I tried to hide the smirk coming onto my face. Although it was humorous, because I knew why she was there at that particular store, I couldn't let her see I wasn't as disappointed as I appeared to be.

"It does when it's a pink cute one and it's on sale- and there's an even cuter Apple guy working there that finally got up the nerve to help me!" she squealed.

I gave in and laughed a little. Alice had been going into the store ever since they had gotten their seasonal employees- which consisted of a very tall, lean, handsome honey blond man. Alice had been putting in at least five minutes of every lunch break there since then in hopes he'd ask if she needed assistance. He never did and she'd always come back thoroughly disappointed.

"Really? So he finally talked to you? Or you talked to him?" Alice was my best friend. It was great working with her. Sometimes we got so swamped though that even though we spent the entire day in the same building, we didn't even see each other.

"Well I thought I was going to have to talk to him," Alice started her story. I continued folding panties to make it look like at least one of us was busy if we were going to be talking. "but, I wasn't sure if he wanted me to. I felt a little doubt. I mean after all that time, it barely dawned on me that he could just think I was some freak who came in there obviously to see him everyday. Or- he could be completely oblivious. Or- he could find me not attractive in the least and I would have wasted all that time… the list was endless of possible scenarios. But- I promised myself I would take action this week. Since the season has started now, it'll be over soon and who knows if he'll loose the job and I'd never see him again!" I listened as she rambled, "so- I decided to go for it- I wanted an ipod anyway," she chuckled, "so I decided to ask him, but… at the very last second, I chickened out. He was right there, across the counter and I couldn't do it. Instead, I turned to another Apple guy- and right as I was about to tap him on the shoulder- the blond one, my Apple guy, practically jumped right over the counter and asked me! He asked me if I needed any help!" I laughed. She was just so excited.

"Yeah, Alice, we're sales people. That's what we do. We ask customers if they need any-"

"No! you should've seen him. You should've heard how he said it… oh, the look in his eyes…" she clutched her bag to her chest dreamily, "it was as if he had been waiting all this time to say it."

"Oh, Alice, that's cute."

"It was."

"What's his name?" I inquired. I stopped folding underwear and started walking towards the back of the store. Alice followed me and eventually we went to where we put our stuff as we worked. Alice stuffed her newly purchased iPod in her purse and I took a drink from my water I had.

"Jasper."

"Ooh, nice. That's uncommon."

"I know, right? You know I have these weird things with names. I like knowing people's names… it's all apart of someone's identity. You know what I mean? like knowing someone's name, just their name, is knowing a small part of them. And with a name like Jasper…" she trailed off, sighing contently. Her eyes seemed to glaze over and I could tell she had already distanced herself from the present and wandered into her own thoughts and fantasies and day dreams. Alice was very whimsical like that. Her mind and being was dominated by intuition, instinct, and gut feelings and destiny and fate. Stuff like that. Me, on the other hand- I was a bit more practical.

Speaking of practical, I left Alice to her day dreams and retreated to the back of our store to the registers. I decided to check in with another co-worker to see if any customers had called the store for me, thinking maybe the Cullen man had made another call inquiring about any purchases or products.

"Hey Mallory," I called as I approached the desk. Lauren lifted her head at the sound of my voice.

"Yeah?"

"I didn't get any phone calls did I? or did anyone call for that matter?" I asked, trying not to let hope slip through in my voice or be too suspicious. Lauren would surely catch on to it. That girl didn't miss a beat of anything remotely gossip related, no matter how small.

"Hmmm…" Lauren paused to ponder. She tapped her foot as she over dramatically wracked her brain for anything pertaining to my question. A few moments later when she still hadn't spoken, I was starting to think that she was purposely keeping me here-just to waste my time.

Right when I was about to say forget it, she spoke. "Yeah, now that I think of it, one man did call. I forgot his name… but he did ask for you. I said you weren't here at the moment. So I helped him with any questions he had over the phone. He said he ordered something online instead and that it should ship here in the next couple of days. I told him I'd call him when it did. That's it."

"Oh…" was all I said. Thanks for stealing my customer, Lauren. I sighed disappointingly and turned to walk away…

I guess that's what I get for leaving air head Lauren at the register.

EPOV

I was sitting in the passenger's seat with my older brother, Emmett. Currently, he was driving a little bit faster than I cared for.

"Emmett, slow down." I warned cautiously, a stern tone to my voice. I kept my eyes locked ahead but I could still see him flustered out of the corner of my eye. He was busy messing with his phone- not a good thing while driving. I don't suggest it. And on top of that, he was flustered over Rosalie. His girlfriend of a little over three years.

"Will you just calm down? You act like you haven't had Christmas with her before."

Emmett finally threw his phone down in a cup holder with a frustrated sigh. His arm was propped out the window as he steered with one hand.

"That's the problem. We've had three Christmases together. Three holiday seasons… three years! This is going on four…"

"And? What's that supposed to mean?"

"And… time is racking up. We're not getting younger. We're gaining history. Rose and I… three years of our relationship already tacked on the belt. one more nearly there too…"

"I don't follow." I turned to look at him now. I had never seen my brother profess such deep thoughts before. I wasn't even aware he had any real worries, to be honest. Seeing him so clearly stressed now made me feel somewhat guilty for that thought. Hate to underestimate him.

"I don't want Rosie to think… to think that I'm not serious about her. I don't ever want her to be one of those girls that complains to their friends how their guy just won't commit when it's been years! I don't want her to feel… like I'm not sure. That she's not good enough. I don't want her to have to reevaluate herself on my account."

"Emmett…" I interrupted, my eyes wide, I wasn't quite sure what he was saying, but it was sort of scaring me. "what are you say-"

"I'm going to ask Rosie to marry me."

"What??….! Are- Emmett- are you sure? While what you just said is nice and all, and as your brother I'm honored you feel comfortable enough to say that around me-"

"I know, me, man of little words, Emmett, jokester, no worries, laugh it up, have a good time, big cuddly bear, Emmett… finally breaking down and taking things seriously…" he shook his head and sighed at himself.

"That's not what I meant- not in a bad way. What I'm trying to say Emmett, those things you said, you should say to Rosie- Rosalie. Maybe she doesn't feel that way. Maybe she's fine with where you guys are at… just because you're getting older doesn't mean you need to rush into getting married. You need to wait until the time is right for you-"

"Edward, I am ready."

"Uh- I-" I just blinked, stuttering. I couldn't think of anything else to say…. "Can we pull over somewhere? I don't think you can focus while driving-"

"Edward…. I'm 26 years old."

"Exactly! You're still young! That's hardly considered over the hill…Rosie will understand…"

"Edward! It's not me who's afraid. I'm not afraid. Not anymore. Meeting Rosie… being with Rosalie. Simply the greatest thing to ever happen to me. And yes, 26 is getting old because I don't want to waste anymore time without her being my wife."

And just then, my brother, my older, more carefree, hardly ever, ever serious brother spoke with such conviction I couldn't argue against him. I wasn't one to argue on this subject anyway… and I groaned as I saw Emmett chose this opportunity to bring up that fact.

"Edward you don't know what it's like…" he pounded his fist on the steering wheel for emphasis. "you haven't met that woman. The right woman for you. You're afraid. But I'm not. You'll see commitment, the word commitment and marriage and husband and wife- you'll see they're all just words that sound scary to us when we're too immature to understand. I understand now. Rosalie has made me understand that none of those are scary words after all…"

I sat back in my seat, eyes wide and glued to the road in front of us. I hardly registered that it was cold outside and we were driving to the mall. I didn't know what for. But right now I fought the urge to be sick. I probably just swallowed a little bit of my own throw up- that's how freaked out I was right now.

Suddenly, Emmett wasn't acting like Emmett. Was it natural for men on the verge of life altering changes to seem so out of character? Do we lose ourselves when we're lost in another? Was I already lost- on my own? All these things frightened me.

But yet, there was a very small, very desolate, lost, tiny particle deep down inside me that was sad. Sad I felt I was losing my brother, sad that I didn't have whatever it was my brother had found. Sad that I was doomed to be alone after all.

And up until this car ride, I didn't feel alone at all.