Sitting in the waiting room was excruciating. Every time the door opened, his head would pop up, looking, hoping it was someone for him. He'd paced the length and breadth of the room. He'd counted ceiling tiles. He didn't dare leave to walk the halls of the hospital. If something happened, if they needed him, he HAD to be there. There was no one else who could speak in his place.
It was so stupid. They should have known better. But they had chased suspects through London a million times before and nothing like this had ever happened. A freak accident, a car turning at just the right moment and a man in the wrong place at the wrong time. It couldn't even be attributed to a case or a suspect. Just chance. And now that man, that beautiful, wonderful man was in critical condition.
Why had he never realized how he felt until now? Was it the adrenaline running through his system? No. It dawned on him that he actually HAD known but had pushed those feelings down. Not his area, not his division, not gay, not a couple. All those thoughts ran through his head. He had known better each time it was said, each time it was heard. But he chose to deny those emotions. He had been afraid. And now, now he may never get the chance to tell the man he loved how he felt.
He would tell that man, that singularly unique man that life was dull before he walked into it. That because of that beautiful man he could see things in a way he'd never considered before. That when that wonderful man spoke, he changed the world. The world was better because he was in it. That life would never be the same because of him. The love of his life HAD to make it, because he needed to tell him all of this.
He sighed as he slumped into one of the chairs and sobbed into his hands. It was his fault. He should have been quicker, he should have seen the car, he should have saved him. It should have been him instead of his love.
It seemed like days, but it was actually only hours, before the door opened. "Family of John Watson?"
"Yes?" came Sherlock's anxious reply.
"He's going to be fine."