Title: Red Hoodie Daniel

Author: Morien Alexander

Rating: G

Pairing: None

Warnings: None

Spoilers: For Children of the Gods... but then, if you haven't seen that, why are you reading SG1 fanfic?

Notes: Little Red Riding Hood- SG1 style. Sadly enough, Sam doesn't make much of an appearance in this one. Sorry, all.


Red Hoodie Daniel

(A Liberal Mutilation of Red Riding Hood)


"Daniel?" Dr. Frasier stuck her head out of the infirmary. "Are you leaving?" She looked tired but happy, and Daniel assumed that she'd been working all day to save someone's life. Or figure out the cure for a disease. Or had really really good-

"Yeah." He already had the strings of his red hooded sweatshirt tied under his chin. Usually he didn't like hoods (or strings), but it had been a gift from Sam and he didn't want to disappoint her. Wearing it was a concession that he would gladly make for his friend. It was all worth it to see her smile. "Going to go back to my apartment and watch the Amazon special on Nova." He yawned impressively. It had been a long day full of rather unproductive translations. He was looking forward to crashing out on the couch with a bowl of popcorn and some cocoa. Or maybe cake. "One of my… old college buddies is on it. Did-did you need something?"

"Yes, actually. I need you to run a gift to Teal'c. He's still recovering from that strange cold you all caught on P2D-X40. It seems Jaffa react differently to it than the rest of you." She gave him an apologetic smile and held out a box of what looked (and smelled) like fresh baked cookies. "Would you mind? Just on your way out? I'm kind of busy in here finishing a report on Major Michaels. He just woke up today." Ah... so it was saving someone's life. Michaels had been in a coma for roughly a week now.

"Sure, Janet." Daniel smiled warmly at her. Despite Jack's whining about a Napoleon complex, she was not above sending her love through baked goods. And she was as good at making cookies, cakes, and pastries as she was at patching up wounded SG teams. He sniffed the box appreciatively. "Oatmeal chocolate chip?"

"None other."

The archaeologist inhaled again and groaned. "Why oh why didn't you bake more of these?"

"Who said I didn't?" She smiled cheekily. "But I saved those for Cassie."

"Make some for me!" Daniel chided before heading down the hall. Janet's oatmeal chocolate chip cookies were famous throughout the base. More than once, she had told him that she considered charging people for them. He had replied that he'd be first in line. Even now, he was tempted to pry the lid off the box and steal one. Teal'c wouldn't miss one

"Whatcha got there, Danny?" Ah, the wolf arrives. Daniel hugged the box closer. If Jack knew what was in that box, he would try all his dirtiest tactics to get some. That was something he'd come to appreciate about the colonel in the field but abhor about him at home.

"Jack."

The grey haired colonel eyed the box. His dark eyes gleamed appreciatively, and Daniel privately thought that he looked rather like a wolf on the prowl. "Looks like homemade cookies. Bake sale?"

"No, these are from Janet. For Teal'c." Daniel pushed his glasses up- expecting a battle. "Because he's been sicker than the rest of us."

Jack leaned in and sniffed, his expression growing more predatory by the minute. "He wouldn't miss one would he?" He wiggled his fingers in a well known gesture of "gimme gimme."

Daniel snatched the box closer to his chest. "Yes, he would! I can't believe you would even consider such a terrible thing!" He neglected to mention that his own mind had traveled along the same path. It wouldn't do for Jack to know that he wasn't quite as moral and good-hearted as he claimed.

"Awww come on… just a liiiiittle bite? A crummy crumb?"

"No! If you want some, you have to ask Teal'c." The archaeologist was firm. If he wasn't going to get any, Jack most certainly wasn't. Of course Teal'c wouldn't share. No one shared Janet's cookies. He doubted that even the Nox would be so kindly if someone tried to take one from them.

Jack heaved a long-suffering sigh. "But you KNOW he won't let me have one. Piggy Jaffa."

"It's not my problem, Jack."

Suddenly, Jack's face dropped the pleading expression. He was all business. Daniel had learned to take this face seriously. Sometimes. "Okay, Daniel. Fine. Don't let me have one. But do me a favor and drop some forms off with Sam. She wanted to request some sort of big blinking doo-hickey for her lab. Hammond gave me the forms, but I'm kind of busy. Can you pass them on before you go to see Teal'c?"

Daniel eyed him distrustfully. "What'll you give me for it?" Doing favors for Jack for free would mean he'd try to get more out of it. Over the years, Daniel had learned to bargain for all he's worth.

The colonel thought for a bit. "Ten extra minutes to study ruins on the next ruinous planet."

"Twenty."

"Fifteen."

"Done."

The papers changed hands and Daniel took off to Sam's lab. She was delighted to see him wearing the red hoodie and promptly said so. He didn't want to linger long; the special was going to start soon and he still needed to drop the cookies off with Teal'c. But Sam felt chatty and he found himself talking to her for at least five minutes before he was able to wriggle away.

His first hint that something was wrong was that Teal'c's door was half open. The Jaffa never left his door open- regardless of security. Daniel pushed into the room and spotted the large lump under the bedspread. He must be really miserable. Not even the Jaffa's head was poking out near the pillows. It looked for all the world like he was hiding under the comforter. That was another warning sign. Teal'c never hid his head under the covers. Walking over, he deposited the cookies on a side table. "Teal'c?"

"Mmf."

"Teal'c, did you know your door was open?"

"Uh… yes." His voice sounded strange.

"Are you feeling okay? Your voice sounds funny." Daniel frowned and reached towards the staff weapon that stood against the near wall. The idea of a foothold situation did not appeal to Daniel. Particularly when there was popcorn and cocoa and Nova specials to be had at home.

"It's from my cold, DanielJackson."

"You're looking… awfully... small today, Teal'c. You sure you're eating all right?" The lump wasn't nearly large enough to be Teal'c. His fingers brushed the staff weapon.

"I shall try to eat more," The lump moved a little and Daniel suddenly noticed the shine of grey hair peeking out the top of the blanket near the pillows.

Suddenly everything clicked, and Daniel rolled his eyes. "Oh Grandmother Jack, what grey hair you have!"

"It's 'cause I've been waiting so long for those cookies!" Jack cried (for indeed it was the colonel), throwing off the cover and rushing towards the box. Fortunately at that moment, Teal'c came out of his bathroom with a bare chest and a towel draped around his neck. He was just in position to keep Jack from reaching the cookies without actually trying to. He looked haggard but not too exhausted to throw a questioning look at his two unexpected visitors.

"Oh god, Jack! You're so childish!" Daniel said without much irritation. He turned to their larger friend. "Teal'c, those cookies are for you. Janet's oatmeal chocolate chip." He moved to the door, tugging on his red hoodie. "I'll leave the punishment for Jack's attempted theft up to you."

The last thing he heard before shutting the door was Jack crying, "Oh come on, T, buddy…"


End