Trevor clenched his fists and just stood there, waiting. He didn't know what he was going to say. He'd gone over it in his head again and again and he still hadn't got it right. It was now or never. Well, no, it was ow or put it off for another day but he'd been putting this off for months; he'd been in town for three days now and had tried coming round once already.

Trevor took a deep breath and knocked on the door. It was seven in the evening, Mike should be home by now. Trevor was surprised to hear voices from inside, too muffled for him to understand. The door opened and Mike just looked at him, his lips parted ever so slightly.

"Trevor? What are you doing here?"

"I- I should never have left without talking to you. I've been trying to get the courage to speak to you ever since," he said. "I phoned you last week, but I kept going to voicemail."

"Sorry, you should have left a message," Mike said.

Trevor noticed that he was standing in the doorway, the door pressed against his side, blocking Trevor's view into the apartment.

"Have I come at a bad time?" he asked.

"No."

"Then why are you hiding the apartment?"

"I-I'm not! I-"

Trevor heard another voice from inside the room, a voice he recognised, asking Mike who was at the door. Oh. Oh. So that was why Mike hadn't called him. He hadn't wanted to. He should have known. It was Harvey who had urged Mike to rethink their relationship. It was Harvey that had convinced Mike to ask for some time alone.

Trevor heard Mike calling after him as he walked away but he didn't turn back. He wanted Mike to come after him, even though he knew he couldn't just leave Harvey alone. He wished that Mike had followed him, to prove that he was more important.

When he got back to the hotel Trevor looked at his phone. Seven missed calls, two text messages:

7.09:

Come back, let me explain.

7.15:

Plz, Trev, it's not what it seems

Trevor turned his phone off and started to wonder what he should do now. Should he just hop back on a bus and go back? He'd made a few friends since he'd been away and his boss at the computing firm had promised to keep his job open for him. He turned his laptop on and checked the bus schedule. He wasn't going to be able to get out of town for two days.

XXXX

Trevor woke up and turned his phone on to find three more text messages from Mike.

11.23:

I'm going to sleep now, I have meetings tomorrow so you can't call me but please text me.

8.32:

Trevor please can we meet for dinner tonight? We need to talk.

10:12

Trevor please don't do this. I still care about you. I don't know where we are right now but Harvey and I are NOT together. I've been trying to bring myself to call you. Meet me at mine at 7 tonight. Please.

Trevor sighed. Mike hadn't lied to him before, not about something this important. Or... he didn't think he had. If he was wrong...

At ten to seven, Trevor was standing outside Mike's door, the door that had been his own door. He knocked quickly and waited. Mike opened the door, dressed but still towelling his hair dry.

"Sorry, I'm early," Trevor said. "Can I come in?"

Mike nodded and stepped aside. The room smelled so familiar and Trevor felt a pang of sadness. What if they couldn't fix this?

"Are you thirsty?" Mike asked.

"No. Mike... can you just explain? Please?"

"Harvey was here for work," Mike said. "That's all it was. I had some files he needed, he came to collect them and he stayed for a drink."

"Then why were you blocking the door?" Trevor asked.

"I didn't want him to see you," Mike said, face falling. "You know he thinks you being around is bad for my work."

"Really?" Trevor could barely believe it. He'd been turning it over and over in his head constantly since last night so the idea that Mike wasn't involved with Harvey was strange.

"Trevor, if it was anything else, why would I lie about it?"

He had a point.

"Mike... I'm really sorry," he said. "For everything. For assuming things, for storming off. For... lying to you before."

Trevor thought back to the fight that had separated them. He'd told Mike that he'd stopped dealing. He'd told him that he'd actually gotten a real job and they Mike no longer had to worry about his safety.

"I know, Trevor, but I just can't-"

"No, Mike, hear me out. I'm going to be honest with you. When I said I'd gotten an actual job, I stuck at it for one whole day before deciding it wasn't for me," he said. "But, I've been working since I left. You can even call my boss about it. I've... I told him about us in case you needed proof."

Mike just stared at him. It had taken Trevor years to come out to their closest friends and he still didn't tell people unless they needed to know.

"You told him? That you were gay?"

"Yes. I needed to. I needed you to know what I'm going to do for you. Mike, I hate working at a normal job, but you were right," he said. "What was it you said? I'm more likely to die dealing that I am on death row?"

"You've had a real job all this time?"

"All this time. I... Mike, I tried to write you a letter the night I left but... well it didn't work out."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that I should have never left before I had a chance to speak to you properly. I should never have left without telling you how much I care about you."

"Go on." Mike's expression seemed to have softened slightly. This was one habit that Trevor was annoyed to have passed on to Mike. He'd milk an apology for all that he could.

"Mike, you're everything to me. The time I've spent without you hasn't seemed worth living," he said. Trevor took a deep breath. "I understand if you need some time, but I just love you so fucking much, man. You're my best friend. You're everything."

Mike's expression hadn't changed. Trevor sighed and turned to leave.

"Come here, I've missed you," Mike said, smiling now. He pulled Trevor into an embrace. "I'll talk to Harvey about it."

"Mike, you know that Harvey's right, don't you?" He couldn't help himself. The thoughts that had been dwelling just under the surface this entire time... he was bad for Mike. He didn't want to hurt him again.

"You just told me that you love me," Mike replied, simply.

"I do, but-"

"No, no buts. I love you, you love me. That's it. If you mean it, just stop, Trevor. I'm here to help you work through anything."

"Mike, I don't want to hurt you again."

"Then don't. I love you. Don't make me sing."

Trevor laughed. "Okay, okay."

"Are you coming to bed? I've really fucking missed you."