"I was hoping you wouldn't be here to see me like this, Cas."

The 'bright light' that I had started to doubt was really there at an early age, when it came and broke apart my family, was over and everywhere around me were white walls and of course he was here, Castiel.

(someone that an be called my guardian angel above all others)

"See you like what, Jo? You look beautiful."

As his hands gripped mine tight, like they've done so many times before, I saw that not a drop of blood was left and my guts were very much in place.

"Wow. Thank god I don't have to spend eternity with an ace bandage holding me together. But why are you here, Castiel? You should have stayed with Dean and the others."

He held onto me even tighter as if he dares to let me go even for a second I'll float away from him.

(and I'll finally be gone, away from him who decided a lowly human like me was special enough to love)

"I had to see you, Jo, I had to. You of all people should understand that."

The light was back but even brighter then before, surrounding me in warmth I had never felt before and the only thing I could feel were his hands on mine.

"It's time."

What little I could see of his eyes, those things that had burned into me right from the start ('this is the all powerful, Castiel, does he ever smile?'), told me that what was happening to me was something both freighting and wonderful at the same time.

"Cas? What's happening to me, Cas?!"

His arms pulled me to him, what last part of me he could grab a hold of as the light filled up every part of me, for the first time letting me in so I could see every part of him as if it was my own.

(I knew more of him then Dean would ever get to see)

"You're finally becoming the angel I saw you as from the moment I laid my eyes on you, Jo, and my god you're going to be so much more then I ever thought you would. But don't worry; I'll be here, your angel, to watch over you."

I was almost gone, slipping into the light that was bathing me in its warmth (making me apart of it), but through it all he was still here even if it was only a voice and a welcoming hand.

"But this time, Cas, I get to be your angel."