DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter
A/N: Hermione Granger and her progressive relationship with Ron.
Unwanted
"Excuse me? Do you think you could help me look for my toad? I've already asked around, but no one's seen him."
A girl with bushy brown hair appeared from behind the book she was reading: Hogwarts: A History. She looked at the round-faced boy, who stood in the door of her compartment, and said, "Of course I'll help you. I'm Hermione Granger, by the way."
"Neville Longbottom. Shall we go together or do you think we should split up?"
Hermione considered this as she put her book back into her trunk. "I rather think we should go together. That way you'll be able to describe your toad to people and you'll recognise him if you see him."
Hermione and Neville set off down the train together, asking in each of the carriages. They were nearing the end of the train when Hermione opened the door to two boys. The first had jet black hair and was wearing glasses, while the second had flaming red hair so that it looked as though his head was on fire. He was also holding out a wand.
"Has anyone seen a toad? Neville's lost one. Oh, are you doing magic? Let's see it, then." Hermione sat down, eager to see someone perform magic. Having grown up in what wizards called the Muggle world she had seriously been deprived all her life of the world to which she really belonged. The red haired boy cleared his throat and chanted,
"Sunshine, daisies, butter mellow,
Turn this stupid, fat rat yellow."
Nothing happened. Suddenly, Hermione couldn't stop the torrent of words that came pouring from her mouth. "… I'm Hermione Granger by the way, who are you?" She sat looking expectantly at the two boys while they considered introducing themselves.
"I'm Ron Weasley," muttered the red-head, as the boy with the glasses said, "Harry Potter."
Hermione went into overdrive. She could hardly believe that he didn't know that he was mentioned in several books. Somehow, the one-sided conversation turned to the school houses. Hermione had already decided on the two houses she thought to be best. She knew of Slytherin's reputation for turning out bad wizards and Hufflepuff just wasn't really, well, her. No, Ravenclaw or Gryffindor were where she should be, hopefully Ravenclaw, of course.
Not long after Hermione left the compartment with Neville, who hadn't said a word throughout their whole discussion, but simply stared at Harry Potter as though he couldn't believe his eyes. She thought that the two boys were ok. Obviously, that Ron Weasley needed to brush up on his manners, but Harry seemed nice enough. Maybe I'll try to make friends with them, she thought.
Just outside the door Hermione had to stoop down to tie up her shoe lace and heard something rather mean. "Whatever house I'm in, I hope she's not in it." And to think she had just considered making friends with them! Oh well, some people are so hard to please.
Despite knowing what Ron thought of her, she couldn't help but go back later in the day when she couldn't stand everyone running about and being immature. But she was rebuffed by them just as quickly, so she decided to scorn them before she left. "You've got dirt on your nose, by the way, did you know?"
It was Hallowe'en and Hermione had settled in almost perfectly at her new school. The only problem was that she didn't seem to have any friends yet, something that she was used to by now after primary school. She was sat in Charms, partnering Ron (much to her distaste, and his too, by the looks of it) and they were finally allowed to practice the spell after weeks of studying the theory of how to make objects fly. She had succeeded in making the feather float about their heads. Professor Flitwick had been ecstatic, but for some reason Ron seemed to be in a bad mood afterwards. She had only been offering help!
As she battled her way through the crowed corridor after lesson she once again heard something that didn't please her. She was following in Ron and Harry's wake, intending to talk to them and offer the hand of friendship when she heard Ron say, "It's no wonder no one can stand her. She's a nightmare, honestly."
Hermione stumbled on her robes, making her fall into Harry as she rushed past. She burst into tears without really knowing why. He was right and she knew it, so why was she crying? Because for once in her life she wanted to be friends with someone who wouldn't take advantage of her brain-skills.
She made it to a girls bathroom and locked herself in one of the cubicles. She collapsed on the toilet and let the tears flow. All she wanted was at least one friend. One measly friend with whom she could be herself, laugh and joke with and share experiences with.
Hermione didn't realise that the bell had sounded, signalling the beginning of her next lesson. For once, lessons were taking a back seat as she just wanted time alone to think about something that wasn't classwork. The bell sounded several more times that day until finally it rang for dinner. She was hungry by now and didn't really want to miss her first Hallowe'en feast at Hogwarts, so when she had her crying under control she dried her face and unlocked the cubicle door.
And there stood a twelve foot-high mountain troll.
Even years later, Hermione still could not believe that she, Harry and Ron had gotten out of that situation alive. But, with Harry shoving his wand up the trolls nose and Ron knocking it out with its own club, they had gotten away with it. She would be forever grateful to them and owed them big time.
"Please, Professor McGonagall - they were looking for me."
Professor McGonagall turned to see Hermione for the first time and gasped, "Miss Granger!"
"I went looking for the troll because I - I thought I could deal with it on my own - you know, because I've read all about them."
Ron dropped his wand. Probably because I'm lying to a teacher, she thought, and she smiled inwardly. From that day on, Harry and Ron became her friends, something that was bound to happen after knocking out a fully grown mountain troll and escaping with their lives.
Hermione sat down opposite Harry and Ron at the Gryffindor house table one morning, intending to eat a hearty breakfast. Harry was vacantly nibbling on some toast, which made Hermione wonder which girl he realised he suddenly fancied. So long as it's not Cho again, she thought. Ginny would go nuts. Ron, on the other hand, was ripping his toast to shreds. Uh oh. Not a good sign.
"Good morning! How are we today, then?" Harry appeared not to hear her, but Ron growled, "Never you mind!"
Hermione's smile faltered as she stared at him. What have I done now, she wondered. She had heard from Ginny what had happened last night in that, ahem, 'deserted' corridor and knew that Ron was still sore from it, but why should he take that tone with her? As far as she knew she had done nothing wrong, but little did she know that it was because she had kissed Viktor Krum back in her fourth year.
All day she tried to engage Ron in polite conversation and to get Harry into any conversation at all. When she could stand it no longer, she stormed up to bed, thinking how stupid boys could be when it came to girls.
Almost a whole week had passed by and Ron was still refusing to treat her with any kind of decency. Harry was still often lost in thought, looking as though he was internally battling with himself. She must be special, then, she thought. He wasn't this bad with Cho - Ooh, I wonder who she is!
Gryffindor had just won the match against Ravenclaw and Hermione hoped that maybe she and Ron would be friends once again in the after-math. How wrong she was. Ron had just left the changing room with his broomstick resting on his shoulder and Harry asked her if they should go back to the common room, but, in all honesty, she just wanted to be alone for a little while.
"You go! I'm sick of Ron at the moment, I don't know what I'm supposed to have done…" She turned on her heel and marched out of the room, leaving a bewildered Harry gaping after her. Instead of taking the short-cuts that would let her skip a corridor or two, she walked the long way, giving herself time to think.
She eventually arrived at the entrance to Gryffindor tower on the seventh floor and, after giving the password, she climbed through the portrait hole. What she saw next made her feel something she had never felt before. Jealousy.
Ron was stood in the corner of the room, wrapped up in the arms of none other than Lavender Brown, engaging in an activity that Hermione thought looked rather like an eating contest! Right at that moment, Hermione knew that she wanted to be a contestant, for Lavender to lose so that it was just her and Ron. But no. Here she was on the sidelines having to watch whilst sick to the stomach with jealousy and something else.
She scrambled back out of the portrait hole and ran down the corridor with the Fat Lady calling after her. "What was the point in giving me the password, if you were going to leave just as empty-handed as you were when you went in?"
Hermione ignored her and entered a classroom at random after unlocking it with her wand. She needed a distraction, something to take her mind off of what she had just seen and felt. She pointed her wand into the air and muttered, "Avis." A small flock of yellow birds appeared above her head. They twittered wildly around her head, each trying to get preferential treatment.
Ron was only my friend. Or he was until he decided to ignore her. She had done nothing wrong this time. She hadn't tried to correct him on his homework or refused to let him look at her Transfiguration notes. She'd only sat down at breakfast and said a cheery greeting! This made her wonder if it had something to do with anything Ginny had said the night before about her. There was only one boy she had ever kissed and that was Viktor. Is Ron jealous? Of Viktor? Hermione laughed out loud.
She sat on a desk, the birds still flapping around her head. Stupid Lavender. She doesn't really like him. It's only because of what we did at the Ministry in the summer.
The classroom door creaked open and Harry's head peered in, followed by the rest of his body when he saw her sitting on the desk.
"Oh, hello, Harry. I was just practicing."
"Yeah… they're - er - really good…" Harry looked at a complete loss as to what to say next so Hermione raised the subject neither of them wanted to discuss, but felt they had to, no matter how unpleasant.
"Ron seems to be enjoying the celebrations."
Harry looked even more uncomfortable. "Er…does he?"
Hermione refrained from rolling her eyes, but with difficulty. "Don't pretend you didn't see him. He wasn't exactly hiding it, was -."
Hermione's heart spluttered as Ron burst into the room, pulling a giggling Lavender by the hand. They stopped at the sight of Harry and Hermione, then Lavender left whilst Ron looked anywhere but at Hermione and said, with an attempt at bravado, "Hi, Harry! Wondered where you'd got to!"
She felt as though she was deflating. Whatever she had expected him to say, it wasn't this. He wouldn't even look at her! Hermione wanted nothing more than to be as far away as possible from Ron Weasley. She slid off the desk and quietly said, "You shouldn't keep Lavender waiting outside. She'll be wondering where you've gone."
Hermione walked as slowly as she dared, heading straight for the door, trying to choose a curse to hit Ron with. The birds were still flying around her head when she made up her mind.
This is for our first year, Ron, when you were rude to me before we even knew each other. For our third year, when you blamed me for what Crookshank's supposedly did. Our fourth year for ruining my evening at the Yule Ball on Christmas day. For this week when I have done absolutely nothing wrong!
"Oppugno!" The birds she had conjured zoomed towards Ron and attacked every bit of skin they could get to.
"Gerremoffme!" he yelled.
She yanked open the door and ran down the corridor once again, paying no attention to where she was going or to Lavender, who was standing outside the classroom, obviously listening to everything that had been said. Or rather what hadn't been said.
"Are you staying, or what?" Ron asked.
"I…" The sound of rain hitting their tent made it difficult for Hermione to think. She was torn between staying with one of her best friends, doing her duty by hunting the Horcruxes, and leaving with her other best friend and the man she loved to escape to safety. "Yes - yes, I'm staying. Ron, we said we'd go with Harry, we said we'd help -"
"I get it. You choose him." Ron said this with bitterness and rejection in every syllable.
Before either he or Harry could say anything more, Ron had left the tent, leaving a mutinous Harry and a tearful Hermione trying to get past her own Shield Charm. When she was finally able to remove it, she followed Ron out into the rain, calling his name as she did so.
"Ron! Ron! Come back! Please! Please, Ron!" The rain beat down on her as she spun on the spot, trying to see where he was. But it was no use: he had already gone someplace where he couldn't hear her. She stood in the doorway of the tent, only dimly aware that Harry was still stood in the same place.
"He's g - g - gone! Disapparated!" She broke down, sobbing into her arms as she curled up in one of the sagging armchairs. She didn't notice Harry covering her with blankets from Ron's bed. Instead, she could only think of how she had once again been hurt by Ron Weasley.
Weeks passed by and Christmas tree's were starting to appear in the windows of homes. Harry and Hermione had finally decided to make a visit to Godric's Hollow and they had spent a whole week planning it. It was the eve of their excursion into Harry's first hometown and Hermione was sat in the doorway of the tent keeping watch, whilst Harry slept in his bunk. She could hear him muttering in his sleep, but for once she paid no attention as she kept reciting their plan in her head, whispering under her breath just to hear a voice. After going over it for the twentieth time her thoughts started to stray, going through every worry that had crossed her mind when it was her turn to where the Horcrux. This time, they dwindled on Ron.
Hermione was only slightly angry with him. She couldn't be entirely angry with him, not when she shared most of Ron's views about what they had hopelessly been trying to do for the past several months. Mostly she was just upset with him because he had left her and his best friend, after promising to help Harry in his defeat of the darkest wizard of all time. Both the wizarding and Muggle worlds depended on the three of them to make their lives safe again, something Ron didn't seem to grasp.
I get it. You choose him.
What did that mean? Did he think that she loved Harry? The idea was laughable! Her feelings towards Harry had always been entirely sisterly and she was sure it was mutual. Ron, on the other hand, was different. And thanks to Lavender Brown, Hermione was now able to see that.
You choose him.
Was he jealous? Could he possibly feel the same way about her as she did him? Why hadn't he said so? They had been sharing a tent for months and living at 12 Grimmauld Place for about a month before that. There had always been plenty of time to talk to each other, and they had talked, but not about what they felt about each other. They only ever spoke about what they were doing with Harry, wondering whether he had proper plan that he hadn't told them about yet. It wasn't as if one of us would be going somewhere without the other, she thought.
"Ha! That's where you're wrong," she whispered to herself. "He left, didn't he? He doesn't care for me, or for Harry. I knew it!"
Hermione vowed to herself, as she watched the snow swirling in the darkness, that, if she lived through this ordeal and ever saw Ron again, she would never let him hurt her again. He had had his chance. Plenty of them. And he had chosen his path, chosen to abandon his friends for the safety and food of his mother. Whereas she had stayed behind, helplessly trying to locate the dark objects that were the only way to defeat Voldemort.
If Ron could leave her behind then he obviously didn't need her anymore. If that was true then she no longer had any need of him. She would do what was asked of her by helping Harry and when they were done and hadn't died on the way, then she would set up a life for herself without Ron in it and try her damnedest to introduce new laws to make the lives of house-elves fair.
She didn't need Ron. Did she?
A/N: Review?
