By Adrienne Valentine
Summary: A lil' story I did for school ages ago, kinda sucks, and kinda sad. I'm re-doing it. With a second part with Cloud's point of view. I re-wrote it because it sucked so bad. I'll put up the original version in a second chapter. It was written before Advent's Children was. So there!
Disclaimer: I own no one, except for the children, some one think of the children!!! ./.
The night was like those Tifa hadn't seen in quite some time, the stars were shining brightly in the sky and everything seemed to be at piece. She couldn't remember the last time it had been like this, then again, she had never took the time to notice ever since... Ever since the incident in Nibelhiem. Now, of course, the threat of Jenova was gone, and she had as much time as she wanted to look at the stars and think. Under normal circumstances she would have enjoyed looking out at the stars, but today wasn't normal. She looked around her on the small balcony: it was still as empty as always. She was supposed to be downstairs tending to her bar, but she had left that to her friend, Yuffie. She needed to be alone right now.
It had been a year since Cloud had left and she wasn't exactly sure what to make of it anymore. He had left right after the battle with Jenova, he hadn't even said goodbye to anyone, he had just up and left. She sighed, she didn't say anything to anyone, but she wished everyday that he would return. He hadn't even called or sent a letter. No one spoke about him, at least not around her, but she knew what they thought. She knew.
Tonight was different though. It had been exactly a year, and no one would ever bother her when she came up here to look at the stars. No one wanted to see the sadness in her eyes. She guessed it was because they all felt guilty. They had all seen how she had cared so much for Cloud and how he hadn't cared and blindly longed for Aerith. She sighed and then froze. Tonight was very different. Tonight someone was coming upstairs. At first she thought that they must be going to one of the other rooms, but she heard the door to her bedroom open and close, quietly.
For a moment she dared to hope it was Cloud. She didn't want to look though. She didn't dare look. It would ruin the illusion, so she just closed her eyes as the intruder walked out and stood next to her. There was a long silence and neither moved. Neither spoke. Tifa was pretending it was Cloud. It was all she could do to keep herself from crying as the other person wrapped their arms around her and gently kissed her. She knew it wasn't Cloud. Cloud would never love her like he had Aerith. She sighed after the kiss, her eyes still closed and leaned her head against the faux Cloud's chest.
It was time to move on. She couldn't become a hypocrite and do to herself exactly what Cloud had done. She couldn't keep dwelling on the past.
It had been four years since Tifa had given up on finding Cloud, she had forced herself that entire time not to think of him. She had always just assumed him dead. Just like everyone else. That way, she didn't have to feel guilty. She didn't have to worry about what he would think or what he would say. The illusion had been ruined, though. It had started as simple rumors. Little rumors of people who hadn't even known Cloud saying they had seen him. She had dismissed them. She doubted those people would have recognized him. The man they saw was undoubtedly some random blonde haired man.
But then she had started hearing it from the others. From her friends. None of them had said it directly to her, they all knew it was still a sore spot for her; but she had heard them none-the-less. First Vincent had said he had seen Cloud in Nibelhiem, visiting her old house. Then Barret saying that he had seen him near North Corral. Soon they all had said that they had seen him. At first that was all it was. They had seen him but they hadn't spoken with him. It was Yuffie who was the first to say she had talked to Cloud, and Tifa would've been an idiot to have missed it.
She soon found out that he had been talking to everyone except for her for a week now. It wasn't that long of a time frame, but it still made her heart ache. She had been glad to some degree that he hadn't yet even tried to talk to her, but it still made her want to cry.
And now, there he was. Standing infront of her. Outside of her house. With flowers. A whole bouquet of roses. Red roses. She felt her heart shatter. She felt the need to reach out to him and embrace him. It had been five years since he had dissappeared and now he was there with her. Now he was saying that he loved her. That he had been a fool to leave five years ago. That he hoped she could find it in her heart to forgive him and take him back. For a moment that's all she wanted to do. She wanted to take him back. To run into his arms and never let go.
But a small child tugging on her skirt pulled her out of her fantasy. A small child with dark brown hair and green eyes. Green eyes, not blue. A child that was asking who the blonde haired man with the flowers was. A child that was calling her mommy. She smiled down at the child and told the little one to wait for her in the kitchen. Then she looked sadly at her old flame and told him. Told him that she was married now. That she had moved on and couldn't take him back. It was too late.
She watched as he nodded sadly, seeing the same resignation she had felt before. Now more than ever she wanted to hold him. To kiss him. To tell him that she still did love him. But it wasn't right and she knew it. He had made his decision five years ago. And four years ago she had made hers. She hadn't asked him to change. Not once. She had hoped. She had prayed, but she'd never asked him. And he couldn't ask her to change her mind either.
He handed her the flowers and walked away. She watched him until he dissappeared. Once he was out of sight she shut the door soundly, fighting back tears. She looked at the bouquet in her hands, wondering what she should do with it when she noticed a small box with a note attached to the top of it. With shaking hands she pulled them both from the flowers, setting the roses down on a small table near the door. She opened the note first and read it.
Dear Tifa,
I love you. I always have. I didn't leave to find Aerith. I left because I was afraid to tell you. It's been five long years and it's killing me not to be with you. I can't promise much, except that I'm going to do what I should have everyday since I met you. And that's tell you I love you.
Cloud
She stifled a sob and carefully opened the small box, knowing without question what would be in it. A ring. An engagement ring. She couldn't hold back her tears anymore as she sunk downto the floor and cried, resting her back against the door. She wished then that she had waited for him. Tried harder to find him. Something. Anything. But she realized as her child came over to her and asked her what was wrong that she couldn't have waited all that time. He had made his choice. He had been afriad to tell her even with her practically screaming it everytime she was around him.
She had made the right choice. She wasn't going to regret it. He had lost his chance because he hadn't done anything. It had been five whole years. He shouldn't have expected her to wait for him. Brushing the tears off of her cheeks harshly she stood back up, smiling at the little child and asking if they wanted cookies. Hungrily, and innocently, the child nodded. She loved her child. She loved her husband. She had promised herself a long time ago that she wasn't going to give up her life for a fantasy. Now, realizing that it had never been a fantasy, she still swore to keep her promise.
Maybe one day she could look at him and think of him without crying. Maybe one day he would understand. It just wasn't today.
Author's Note:
Okay, so this is a re-write of an old story. In the original it was Tifa/Reno. This one leaves it open to the imagination. The only hint to Reno/Tifa is the kid's eye colour. Well, think Reno has green eyes... Some fans say blue. Oh well. Hope you like it!