Disclaimer: GW Ain't mine, Kay? Alright!

Chapter 1: Somber Beginnings

Heero had died, it felt like yesterday, but in fact it was 7 years ago, shortly after the war, he was 17 then. Now, things had changed, Duo Maxwell sat at his desk, he did mostly paperwork now, with 3 children to care for, they didn't want 'daddy' to die. "Tomorrow is Relena's 25th birthday." He said to no one in particular. He thought over all that had happened since the war, Trowa owned several circuses, Quatre ran winner enterprises, Wufei was chief of the Preventors, and he was in a cozy job with three beautiful children, well in fact one was not his, but he loved the child non the less. He often thought of Heero, he had loved him and knew although it would never have been, even if he were alive; that he could never love anyone else.

So, he married the one person who understood him, Relena Peacecraft–Maxwell. She was a good wife and a fair mother, not around much thou, she tended to treat her first child better than the last two, Sammy, (a girl) was Heero's child. So Duo knew that they had been in love; in fact they had even been engaged. However, she didn't know that he had loved Heero, as much as she, if not more but, had no care for it either way, she seemed content. She still called his name at night, wile she slept, whenever she was home. If Heero were alive he would be with her.

"Hey, you can go home now Maxwell, to your wife and kids, it's 2:30, quit'n time." Sally Po, who was now his direct boss, called as she exited the building, / I get to go home to my beautiful children, but they won't be out of school for 30 min. until then I get to go home to my wife/ he thought as he begrudgingly got up and left for the day, only to be stopped by the head boss man.

"Hey Maxwell, how's Relena." Wufei ask. Wufei had not attended the wedding stating that it was injustice to marry Relena because of Heero's memory, but Wufei had come around, or could pretend fairly well.

"You would know more than me." Duo said with a sigh.

"She being distant again Maxwell?" He ask in a snide tone. Duo didn't answer, but shook his head up and down a few times. "She sure has been giving you hell." He sounded somewhat remorseful now. Maybe Wufei felt sorry for him thinking he loved her and she couldn't return his love. Yea, he was sure that's it.

"Wufei, do you think I love her?" Wufei looked confused and furrowed his brow, thinking before answering,

"I 'know' you love her," His voice got slightly angry sounding, "You probably liked her all through the war, and just waited for Yuy to die to get her," His voice sounded almost hurt for a moment, he looked at Duo expecting at least shame or shock but Duo just looked tired, he had looked tired for almost 7 years, when not around his kids or putting up a front, Wufei took it as an omission of guilt. Duo had expected Wufei's answer and started to move when Wufei spoke again. "Your upset she can't return the feelings, it makes you look sad, I pity you Maxwell, it's sad she'll never love you, don't you know that she only loved Yuy; what you did was unjust, and you have to live with it because, Maxwell, not to hurt your feelings but you are cold, and I can't believe you thought she could ever love you, she won't, do you know that?"

A smile rose on the corner of Duo's face as he said, "Yes."

Wufei turned to leave "I pity you Maxwell, I do."

"Wufei have you ever loved someone so deeply that you know even after they are gone you'll never love again, and would do anything absolutely anything for them, for there happiness, to see them smile, and did you love them so much you would gladly die for them?" Duo looked with eyes void of emotion at Wufei.

"Meiran," the name of his dead wife slipped from his mouth, and he smiled, his eyes slightly shown with unshed tears. "You don't know what love is Maxwell."

"I beg to differ."

"No, Maxwell, you can't know, Heero died and you took off without a word for a year and a half, then you came back and purposed to Relena, how could you, the body was barely cold."

"There was no body."

Wufei ignored the comment. "You left only a year to grieve I lost respect for you, your sick Maxwell, if you had waited 3 maybe four years then maybe it would have been acceptable but,"

"She accepted"

"She only did it because you offered to take care of her and, and…"

"I told her she didn't need to love me."

Wufei spun around, until now he had been facing the door. "Why? Was she that much of an importance to you, tell me Maxwell?"

"I have lots of love for my children, and my friends, even my enemies, mostly my children," He let a small sigh escape his lips "because I feel alive around them, but I have no love left in my heart in any romantic way, it's void, and I feel as though I am missing a piece of my soul."

"Serves you right." Wufei said.

"I never wanted to loose the only person I could ever care for in that way, I couldn't stop it, I relived it a million times, if I could have I would have given my life, but I can't," he sounded crestfallen "not now, not then so that part of me is a shell."

"What the hell are you talking about Maxwell, you're acting as if Relena is dead, just because she can't share your feeling?" Wufei looked expectantly at Duo.

"Relena's birthday is tomorrow, please come."

"Why? It makes me sick to be around you, Maxwell."

"Come for Lena, it's hard for her, or I guess it is, she's never said anything about it."

"What's hard?"

Duo looked up, he laughed halfheartedly, "Today is the day Heero died, no one seems to remember." With that Duo started to leave once more, but he turned just at the door. "I loved him too, Wufei, much more than you could know, he was it, that is why I ask Relena to marry me, because I was already as numb as she, better at hiding it but still numb, I loved him with all of my heart." Duo left.

Wufei stood there, before Maxwell had left he had seen a tear streaking down his face, and Duo didn't cry, Wufei felt sick, he felt like he had just disgraced his whole family, he took several minutes to collect himself and then left.