Juz a little Miyu humor, is all, minna. ^_^

Miyuki hummed as she entered the Rikkai clubroom, momentarily unaware of the heavy silence hanging in the air like a giant sponge. A giant, heavy, sponge, sucking every sound within a three mile radius.

She had just begun to comb her hair when she noticed that Something Was Not Quite Right. Turning around slowly in mid-comb, Miyuki regarded her friends with a curiosity one might use when examining the remains of something someone ate and threw up.

She frowned. Sanada was glaring at Niou, who was grinning. Yukimura looked mildly worried. Akaya's eyes were wide. Marui was chewing gum. Jackal was not there. Yagyuu was shaking his head. Renji was taking notes. Kazumi was looking as if she'd rather be in Hawaii surrounded by hunks with great hair and even greater abs. Wouldn't we all.

"Did somebody die?" Miyuki asked, half-expecting them to say that yes, Niou had suddenly gone wild and killed Jackal. Miyuki took two steps towards the door. Just in case.

"No," Niou grinned again. "But I might need a lawyer,"

Miyuki stared at him blankly. She suddenly felt very odd. She had to go and sit down.

****

"You WHAT?!" Miyuki screeched loudly. This could not be happening. But then again, it was Niou. She shouldn't even be the least surprised that the Trickster used crack. Or that he was stupid enough to leave the boxes of crack on the ground to go and flirt with the big busted blonde from across the street. Boxes that had great big strips of masking tape labeled 'Niou Masaharu' no less. Behold, the mentally incompetent.

"So let me get this," Miyuki said slowly. "You bought three boxes of crack, pushed the drug dealer into a river, left the boxes of crack with your name on it on the ground in front of the local police station, went off to flirt with that blonde, who, for your information, was a guy, not a girl, and you still expect me to get you a lawyer?"

Niou nodded. Then he paused. "You mean Mariah was a guy?"

"Yes, Niou. He was a guy. A cock-wielding, sweat-smelling, grapefruit-wearing, long-haired guy. I feel sorry for you." Miyuki paused wrinkled her nose in disgust, then continued. "And about a lawyer. I don't think my Dad will want to work for you. He'll probably sue you then move me to Hawaii." She cut off quite abruptly, considered this, then reconsidered everything. "On second thought, don't move. I'll go call him."

"Your dad is a lawyer?" Niou asked, a small smile forming on his features. Kazumi nodded, wondering why the hell she was here. Then she remembered her cousin and his mentally deranged team. Kazumi was happy to be here.

"Why are you smiling?" Miyuki asked, snapping her phone shut. Stupid lawyers with their stupid hectic schedules.

Niou bent over and whispered in Kazumi's ear. Miyuki's bright brown eyes were slits. Her hand went instinctively to the door knob and the knife she had taken to carrying around the day after she had met Niou Masaharu.

"Be my lawyer,"

Miyuki had the sudden urge to run Niou with that knife then and there.

*****

"I can't believe I'm doing this," Miyuki muttered, glaring balefully at Kazumi, who was busy fussing with her hair.

"Stop moving, Miyu." Kazumi snapped, tying up Miyuki's hair into a tight bun and making the final arrangements on her best friend's face. She stepped back to admire her work.

If Miyuki was young (which she certainly was) then it did not show. She looked to be about in her early twenties. Her eyelids were painted with a slight shading of light pink, matching her reddish cheeks and rose red lipstick. Her nails had been manicured professionally and painted red. Miyuki was wearing a grey jacket with matching short grey skirt over a red turtleneck. If anything, she looked like a young, fresh lawyer. And this young, fresh lawyer looked mad. Really mad.

Niou walked in the room, trailed his eyes up and down Miyuki and gave a long, low whistle.

"She looks great," Niou smirked. "Great enough to be my lawyer,"

Miyuki huffed, wobbling slightly in her six-inch black Gucci heels. She made to stamp off and walk away but instead she wobbled slightly, fell, cursed, then got up, fell down again, cursed, removed the shoes with strong vehemence, threw one to the floor and the other one to Niou, who ducked.

"We need work on the heels," Niou panted running around as Miyuki chased him with a shoe. Kazumi was idly debating on whether to steal the bottles of thirty or so nail polish lining her best friend's bag. She decided against it and stole the whole bag.

*****

"Why do I have to be your lawyer again?" Miyuki asked Niou, who was retying his ponytail. His trial for consumption of illegal drugs, for the pushing of an illegal drug pusher down the river (no complaints there), and for illegally hitting on the police man's daughter while being interrogated, was fixed for directly the day of the crime, afternoon. Niou's stupidity knew no bounds.

"Cause you're living under the roof of a very successful lawyer. Something must have rubbed off on you. Now, do you know what to do?" Niou asked.

"Of course." Miyuki rolled her eyes, practicing what she was going to say in front of the court. Ladies and gentlemen of jury, my client here has been accused of illegal consumption of the drug known as crack. He has also been accused of pushing a drug dealer, identity now known, down the river. His reasons for doing these are one; he recognized the drug dealer, and two; he had nothing better to do. These may not sound like much, ladies and gentlemen, but that's probably because they aren't. Good day to all of you.

Armed with this and a couple of billion in cash, Miyuki thought she stood a fair chance against lawyers who probably knew what they were doing. But with money in her hands, Miyuki was in her element. Get ready lawyers.

Anyway, if Niou got thrown into the slammer, Miyuki could probably bribe him back out with a couple of million and a winning smile.

Or she could just forget all about it and get on with her life.

*****

Miyuki stood in front of the judge, heart beating fast. She now saw the loopholes. She had no license to become a lawyer. She just turned thirteen last month. Her companion was a fifteen year old crack-filled young man who could probably tunnel himself out of jail if his lawyer failed to convince the jury otherwise. Miyuki suddenly wondered why she felt so nervous.

"Your name is?" The judge's voice rang out, clear and true in the now-silent court. Niou sat beside Miyuki, egging her on.

"Yukimi Misuzu, your Honor, attorney-at-law, I specialize in criminal cases," Like every single person attending Rikkaidai Fuzoku Gakuen.

"Hm…new?"

"Yes, your Honor."

"Very well."

Miyuki steeled herself; mentally reminding her worried brain that if she didn't win this case for Niou, he would probably blow up the whole police station and escape anyway. Comforting.

Look Dad, Miyuki thought grimly as she was called up front. I'm following in your footsteps. Only I don't seem to have inherited your lawyer skills.

Miyuki comforted herself with the thought that she was rich. Sometimes being rich made everything better.

Especially when you needed to bribe the…whoa.

*****

"Well?" Niou asked impatiently, staring expectantly at Miyuki, who looked dazed and strangely happy. She and the Judge (who looked way too young to be a judge) had been talking in silent whispers for about half of the trial, and Niou could hardly understand what was going on around him. He just wanted to know if he was going to jail or not. Niou always carried a shovel around, anyway.

"Huh? What?" Miyuki looked at Niou. Niou groaned.

"Am I going to jail or not?"

"Oh. That." Miyuki giggled. "Not after my date with Andrew,"

Andrew?

"Who, exactly," Niou asked, "Is Andrew?"

Miyuki shrugged.

"The judge."

Aw…Isn't that sweet. Miyu's following in her dad's footsteps!

And she got a date with the hot judge.

This was based on my mom asking me if I wanted to be like my dad (he's a lawyer) when I grow up and me wondering what kind of shit would happen if Miyu became one. ^_^

Drop me a review, minna!