*So this is a story I had to get out of my system after seeing the awful5x15. Maura has to stop putting up with all the abuse and this is my"personal vengeance". Please keep in mind that English is my thirdlanguage, so all mistakes are mine. *
*Disclaimer: I don't own Rizzoli & Isles. They are property of TessGerritsen, TNT and everyone involved in the show.*
This was it. I wasn't expecting to go home only to see all my secret closet items displayed like in a flea market only because Angela was angry at me for trying to help her manage her economy. As soon as Jane and I entered the home and saw this, Jane started making jokes about my buying choices, while Angela was talking to me so proud of herself for dedicating me yet another humiliation.
It kept me thinking all day. Why was I putting up with all the abuse the Rizzolis were throwing at me? All the laughs, the mockings, the home invasions, the awkward family dinners... All for what? There was only one nice gesture from Jane and that was after I almost blew her away for jumping off that bridge and giving me the scare of my life. Not before or even after that did I get any other "reward" for being so nice and patient to the entire family. They don't understand that thanks to me they are still a family. I saved Frankie's and Jane's lives during the station shootings. I saved Tommy from jail by solving his case. I gave Angela a house when she didn't have any other place to live. And this is how she repays me? I could feel my blood boil more and more with every passing second and in my case that wasn't good because I was a very patient person, but when I exploded consequences where unpredictable. I just lost control and let my anger act for me. So I took a few very deep breaths and focused myself on the web I was reading when all this train of thought came to haunt me.
Next day didn't come soon enough, and before going to the station, I decided to stay at home alone and do what I had planned. Right after Angela left for work, I entered the guest house and started packing her things. When I was done, I went to work satisfied with myself.
I couldn't help it, but I acted cold around Jane the whole day and she noticed it.
"Maura, are you OK? You're acting weird."
"No, I'm fine." I tried to sound as nonchalant as possible, but that's not my forte so I failed miserably.
"You're not fine. Please tell me what's bugging you."
"Not here, Jane. After work, I'll tell you everything at home."
"OK. But I'll be here if you need me."
How many times had I heard that? How come it didn't mean anything to me now? For a long time Jane had had my back, but it's been a while since she hasn't and today is not different. I just focused on the task at hand and decided to leave all those problems for later.
It was 6:30 when we arrived home and I appreciated that Jane and I took our own cars so we could avoid a very awkward conversation or lack thereof. I knew that Angela was about to arrive home and then the show could begin.
Jane and I were having a beer when we heard the click of the guest house door followed by a cry.
"Mauuuuuraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" Angela came all agitated to the main house, slamming the door on her way. "What the hell is this? All my things are packed up! What's going on?"
Jane had a horrified face after her mother's words.
"This is you moving out of my guest house, Angela." I could feel my anger building up inside me but I tried to remain calm.
"But why? What did I do?"
"Oh, that's hard to answer, because you have done so many things that I actually lost track. But to sum it up, something Jane really loves, yesterday was your last humiliation."
"Wait, yesterday? You are talking about the stupid closet thing? It was just a joke! That's what family does, you get on the other's nerves to have some fun! I don't think that's a big deal, do you, Jane?"
"Of course not! Maura, you're overreacting. Come on, let's help ma unpack her things and have dinner, I'm hungry!"
"NO! Angela, you went through all my things when you didn't have the right and that wasn't the first time that you took the entire arm instead of the hand I offered you. I'm tired of your attitude and I need my space, so I've rented an apartment for you and I even paid the first month. Now that you have money thanks to your new job, I'm sure that you won't have any problem to afford the place. And Jane, there's no dinner today nor tomorrow nor the day after tomorrow. I'm so fed up of your superiority. Of seeing you dismissing my feelings. Of seeing you putting yours and your family needs before mine. Of your constant mockings. For a long time I was happy for having a family. A real family with love and support that I could count on. But that changed into an abusive relationship where I'm always the victim. I didn't even realize how hurtful your actions were until one day I stared myself in the mirror to see a different person. One I didn't want to be. Small, worthless, insignificant. At least before I met you all I was alone but I had my self-confidence. I could face anything because I felt strong. But the Rizzolis have managed to reduce me to nothing. I'm a shadow of who I was and I don't like this current me. I'm gonna change into my self-confident self again and any of you will be there to see it because I don't want you in my life anymore. Close the door on your way out." I stormed out.
Jane and Angela stared at each other with shocked faces and Jane asked:
"What the hell just happened?"
The next day arrived and Maura hadn't said a word to Jane or any other homicide detective, but a murder case arrived and Jane saw it as a chance to talk to her favorite ME. On the elevator ride downstairs her heart was racing so she had to calm herself before facing the music. As the elevator doors opened, she regained her (false) self-confidence and headed towards the crime lab, only to find it empty. She then saw Susie so she asked her where Maura was and the senior criminalist told Jane she would find her in her office. After taking a deep breath, Jane knocked on the office door and waited till she heard "Come in!" said by the beautiful voice of her (until now) best friend. She entered the office but saw a change of demeanor from her friend. She noticed how rigid she went when she saw her walk in but didn't say anything.
"Hey, how have you been?" She tried to act as casual as possible, but the ME didn't take the bait.
"Jane, do not pretend that yesterday didn't happen, because it did and I was serious. Our relationship will remain professional from this day on, no personal interference. So if you have come to talk about the case, you are welcome to stay. If not, you can leave right now or I will." To hear herself say those words was hurting her but it was also liberating.
For a long time, she didn't know how it felt to stand up for herself, and now that she was, she felt better. Jane on the other hand was realizing that the day before the best relationship from her life had come to an end and she was regretting every single moment that she made Maura feel bad. On the verge of tears, she tried to fix things.
"Maura, please, hear me out. Nothing my family and I did in the past was to harm you, at least not on purpose. We love you so much, you are a part of this family too. Please don't leave us."
"That's my point Jane. Maybe it wasn't on purpose but you did it anyway. And everytime I tried to talk about my feelings you dismissed me with a wave of your hand and focused on "more important" things, like your awful relationship with sexist Casey. If you want I can make you a list of all the times I felt abused by you or the others but it would be a long list. I can highlight a few moments though, like the time I donated my kidney to Cailin and afterwards you all thought I was being obnoxious for feeling depressed. But after you got shot at the station you spent three months on the mend complaining and yelling at everybody and nothing happened. What's the difference between you and me? You have more rights than I do? I'm tired of being laughed at. I got used to it when I was young but all those were random people and I didn't care. But now, being a grown-up I don't have to put up with any kind of abuse, much less coming from my "family". And the last straw was yesterday, when your mother felt she had the right to expose all of my secrets why? Because she felt angry that I tried to assess her on her economy? She's stepped onto so many boundaries that I don't want her at my home anymore. Now that she's economically stable she can afford her own home, so goodbye. And about you, I thought once that I couldn't live without you, but all this time has taught me to be stronger and feel good with living on my own again. I have to thank you all for teaching me a lesson, that I'm a better person than you think I am. Now it's time to take care of myself and stop worrying about what you'll think or feel. Now it's my time and it will be without you, Jane. You lost too many chances and now it's too late. And a piece of advice: if you love someone, try not to be a bitch to them. Try to be just a person and things will turn out to be fine. Bye, Jane."
After this rant I wasn't aware I had inside me, I opened the door to my office and exited the morgue, to breathe some fresh air and have a nice cup of tea all by myself. This was the first time in years that I didn't feel depending on anyone. I felt good with myself and capable of facing the world with confidence again.
*If you continue reading this story you will understand why all thecharacters acted the way they did, especially Maura.*