Hi :) This is my second fanfic and i worked really hard on it and i hope you enjoy it

The need was consuming her very being. Her existence. Had she known her feelings all those years ago, upon that fateful meeting with Fox Mulder, in the stuffy FBI basement, she may have been more determined to hide them from him. He completed her. And try as she might, she could not live without his compulsion to protect her or his unwillingness to leave her side. Back then, she hadn't known that her initial infatuation with him was merely the beginning of a blossoming love so strong, that it cannot be unbound by even the strongest forces at hand. Special Agent Dana Scully was in love. There. She said it. The Sceptic,The Scientist, The Rational One was in love. She was in love with the crazy, annoying, infuriating, hysterical man that answers to the name of Mulder. He was her Mulder.

She had dreamed about him touching her in ways that could only be accomplished by true lovers, and had heard him moan her name. But that was only fantasy. How could she know that he loved her as well? They shared the occasional innuendo and flirtatious glance, but that was all it was. Did any of that mean anything to him as much as it meant to her? Was this just part of some game? Some horrible, twisted game to get her to fall in love with him, only to reject her?

After all they had been through, would it be possible for either one of them to deny their true feelings any longer?

And then there was the technicality of 'does he love me?' or 'does she love me?'. Why did their feelings have to be of such pain and fear? If only there was some way of communicating to each other, their darkest, most private longings. They could have embraced their fears and desires, but only to create a connection that was already there.

Love.

A love so deep that it required no sexual intimacy to be complete, for their love was based on friendship, trust and respect. Their relationship was beyond what any lovers' could ever have. Or ever wish for. Mulder loved her. And in the very back of her mind, the part that she locked away, she knew it. But why ruin a great partnership if she was simply misreading the signs? How would she live with herself? Knowing that her only true friend, her protector, was now nothing but a distant memory because of her selfish actions.

Just thinking of this made her loathe herself for letting this man become so emotionally entwined in her life. She knew that she should ignore her feelings about him and continue with her work. God. Sometimes she hated the rational mind that is Dana Scully. Stick to the rules, follow the procedure and listen to protocol.

But how could she listen to the rules, when this had nothing to do with the FBI and everything to do with her personal life? Then again, fraternisation required proper re-assignment procedures. But nothing had happened between them, as much as Dana would have liked it to. She wasn't alone in her wishing that things would go further. Mulder had spent many a night fantasising about her, as had she about him.

But Mulder was old-fashioned. He wouldn't do anything unless he knew that it was what they both wanted.

It would change everything between them. They would go from friends and colleagues, to lovers, over the course of one night. But was that really what she wanted? There were consequences that come with getting involved with someone that you're so close to. In some ways it was what she wanted. She wanted to give every bit of herself completely to him. To trust him not only with her mind and her life, but with her heart.

But in other ways, she hated to be so vulnerable. To have her heart open and exposed to hurt, rejection and break. Dana had this strong mask of uprightness that covered all her 'flaws'. She kept a guard around her personal life and heart, and only let people who she trusted implicitly, enter. She had been scorned and weakened many times by partners that she let linger too close to her precious source of life, and had learned her lesson each time, but Mulder wouldn't do that to her.

Although, how could she be sure? She had thought that all those previous lovers wouldn't hurt her. Yet they had every time when it was too late for her to be in control. That vulnerability made her feel sick to the stomach. Mulder coursed through her veins. He kept her alive. He made her happy. A feeling that showed itself none too often in her lonely life. She longed for someone to make her feel as if she belonged in this world and finally, she had met that someone. It was too complicated though. And they both knew it. Their relationship would come between their work and they had to set their priorities straight.

Although at the moment, they hadn't admitted it to each other, or even themselves for that matter. It wasn't as if it were their feelings were tainted by nostalgia, as much as they were afraid of rejection. Or maybe it was that they were afraid of what others might think. It wasn't usual that Dana cared about what anybody thought, but when it comes to Mulder, she only cared what he thinks.

The feeling of loving him was only fleeting. It was wonderful, until the dark truth set in. The fear, the memories and the possibilities. What did Mulder truly mean to her? Was she only attracted to him because he is the closest male friend that she has? Or were her feelings only because she spent nearly all her days with him, trying to find out the secrets and conspiracies of the shadow government? What was not there with any of her previous partners was there with him. Why? It was the only thing that she could not figure out. Of course she loved him as a friend but-

"-Ully? Scully?"

Mulder snapped his fingers to try to get her attention. As she came back into the realm of reality she realised in horror that she was sitting in her car, outside her apartment. Mulder tapped on the frosty, glass window. what was she thinking? Of course she loved him; as more than a friend. She got out of the car and Mulder followed as they headed into her apartment building, Mulders large hand at the small of her back.

She decided that she was going to show him how much he meant to her and as she suspected, the feelings were mutual.