Slow Dancing In A Burning Room
by: Dastunninglitoanjo
Author Note (pretty important, so please read): Well, it's been a while since I've written anything for ...Anyways, this was suppose to be a one shot, with both Iruka and Kakashi's view points within the story...but somehow, I just couldn't fit Kakashi's POV into this part. So, depending on many things, (if I have time to write, have the motivation, etc,) I may or may not post up a second part (Kakashi's POV) to this story. I really hate leaving things unfinished though, so I may eventually post it up...
But be warned now that sometimes, when I lose the inspiration or motivation to write, it takes me a while to get it back.
Well, for now, you don't have to worry. Because I am still very much inspired to finish this.
If I change my mind, you will see this story as complete...or I will say something about it in my profile.
Sorry for the inconvenience. ^^;; Please read, nevertheless, if you had intended to do that.
Not quite sure how to categorize the genre of this story...yup.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Kakashi or Iruka. I would love to own Kakashi...but sadly, I do not.
It's not a silly little moment,
It's not the storm before the calm.
This is the deep and dying breath of
This love that we've been working on.
Can't seem to hold you like I want to
So I can feel you in my arms.
Nobody's gonna come and save you,
We pulled too many false alarms.
We're going down,
And you can see it too.
We're going down,
And you know that we're doomed.
My dear,
We're slow dancing in a burning room.
I was the one you always dreamed of,
You were the one I tried to draw.
How dare you say it's nothing to me?
Baby, you're the only light I ever saw...
We're going down,
And you can see it too.
We're going down,
And you know that we're doomed.
My dear,
We're slow dancing in a burning room.
They stood, facing each other, as if in a face off between two enemies. The atmosphere was so tense, it could've crackled with lightning. One stood by the door, having just came home from a mission. His silver hair was uncombed and ruffled, as if his hands had gone through it many times. His face, as usual, was covered with a mask, with his hitai-ate, forehead protector, slanted to cover his left eye. His right eye stared at the other man without emotion.
The other man, standing just ten steps away, stared back with a composed face. He was tanner than the other, with brown-mocha color hair, up in a ponytail. A distinguishable feature of him was the scar that ran across the bridge of his nose.
Iruka didn't expect Kakashi to come home early, didn't even expect him to come home at all. It had become a pattern of some sort, where he never came home and then on rare days, he would. Iruka had learned not to expect his presence in the house anymore, thus, he didn't sense Kakashi's presence when he did come home.
'10 steps...that's all it is to walk out of this house,' Iruka thought, trying to bring his legs to move. '5 steps to walk by him, then another 5 steps out the door.' It was easier said than done, of course.
It didn't matter that he came home now. Iruka was leaving Kakashi, at last. What once was bliss and happiness when seeing him, now just filled Iruka with pain. The beginning of their relationship was so wonderful, and somehow, it ended like how it was now.
It started 5 years ago, when Kakashi had asked him out. Iruka had been reluctant and cautious at first, but he slowly opened up to him, and Kakashi had been the same. A year passed and Kakashi asked Iruka to marry him. It was the happiest moment of his life. Another year passed with blissful moments, and, even though they both were busy with their own respective jobs, Kakashi out on dangerous missions, and Iruka at the academy, they always made time for each other.
Everything changed the next year. Iruka didn't know when did the change begin or how or why it did. Maybe Kakashi had gotten bored with him. Maybe Kakashi had changed when he had came back alive, from a mission that had went wrong. For a whole month, Kakashi was gone. Hokage sent search units in vain. Kakashi had turned up later, at the gates, passed out with severe injuries. He was never the same again.
The change was slow, and Iruka didn't notice it until months have passed, when he started to notice a pattern. Kakashi had become moodier over time, and closed off to Iruka. Conversations that used to flow freely between them was now strained and shorten. And then, at times, when it seems like things were going back to what they use to be, Kakashi would freeze up and his face going blank. The hand that was gonna caress Iruka's cheek dropped immediately and they were back to square one.
Then came the rumors. Kakashi was hanging in the red-light district at some other town, when he should be home with his partner. No one wanted to confirm it with Kakashi himself, but it was hard to ignore a silver head in a brothel house. Kakashi was doing this, doing that...doing things that he could've done if he was single, and not married.
With reliable sources, Iruka knew that it was true.
It broke his heart.
At first, Iruka tried to ignore the rumors and act as always. But it seemed that, no matter what Iruka did, Kakashi was never happy, never satisfied, never still. His eye had a cold look, no longer warm. Iruka could no longer read his mind, could no longer understand him. Kakashi was no longer the Kakashi he used to know.
Then the lonely days came. It started out with just being gone one day, where he wouldn't come home, even though Iruka knew he didn't have a mission. Then he would be back the next day as if nothing had happened. But as the year came by, one day became days, and then soon became weeks.
Their friends, all tried and failed, to get to the bottom of Kakashi's extreme new behavior. Even Hokage couldn't force Kakashi to tell her what the hell was he doing. And no one could convince him to be the same person as before.
It was a hopeless case and Iruka had to face it. Kakashi was bored with him and no longer happy with him, meaning, he no longer love Iruka.
But Iruka still love him. And with only that left, he still stayed in their home, hoping that by a miracle, his Kakashi would climb through the window and smiled at him like before.
With love, he endured the pain and smiled as usual. He endured the lonely nights where he slept by himself. And the nights when Kakashi did come into bed, he didn't stay long. He endured the hurt feeling of waking up and not having Kakashi and his warmth by his side. He endured the cold look of Kakashi, when they ever met, by chance. He endured, seeing Kakashi with other women and men.
He endured for another year. Until Naruto, the son he loved as his own, convinced him to leave it all. Naruto had been traveling with Jiraiya for a couple of years, and only just learned of what had been happening.
Naruto showed up, exhausted and panting, with Yamato at his side, who explained that when Naruto heard of what had been happening, he was so angry at Kakashi, he unleashed the Kyubi's cloak. Yamato had stopped him and brought him to Iruka.
With uncontrollable tears running down his face, Naruto sniffed and said in a broken voice, "I love you, Iruka-sensei, and I love Kakashi-sensei too. I love the both of you, because you both were happy with each other. But now, now, I hate Kakashi," His voice cracked here, "I hate what he's done. I don't understand him at all. And no one else can talk some sense into him at all!" More tears down his face. "Iruka-sensei, leave him, please. I can't stand it. If you continue to stay here, I might lose control and kill Kakashi-sensei." More and more tears down his face as he said that.
Iruka knew that Naruto didn't want to kill Kakashi...
One arm raised to cover his crying eyes, "Ugh, I'm so sorry Iruka-sensei. I'm so sorry that I wasn't here when you were going through all this bullshit." More hiccups and gasping. "I'm sorry that I wasn't here when you needed someone the most. I wasn't here to save you."
The sight of Naruto apologizing and crying made Iruka cried as well. Iruka knew full well that Naruto felt like he had let Iruka down. Tears streaming down his face, Iruka started, "Naruto..."
"Please, Iruka-sensei. You can come travel with me and Jiraiya. We are going to leave the village again in two weeks. Please, please, come with us. Forget that asshole." Naruto gave a pained smile. "You deserve so much better, so much better than this."
As Naruto broke down onto his knees, Iruka's hope for his Kakashi to come back broke into pieces. He finally realized it. He couldn't believe that it took his two years to realize that their love, his and Kakashi's once beautiful love, had slowly been dying over the years. And at last, at that moment, it had died completely.
All the flashbacks flew by in his mind instantly and Iruka bit back the pain. It took all his willpower, to stand across the man he loved, and not show any emotion. Seeing Kakashi's face brought back feelings from before, but he knew that it wouldn't last. Soon, Kakashi would just been gone again. This was the first time in 4 months since he'd been back.
Iruka almost wanted to explain where he was going and why did he had his bags next to him. But he didn't. No. He wasn't obliged to tell him anything.
Coldly, Iruka told him, "The papers are on the table. I already signed my part. I'm sure you know what to do after I leave."
Iruka say the one eye shift slightly to look beyond him and at the table. His eyes widen just a bit, just enough that Iruka could tell.
Iruka paused for a moment, then grabbed his bags. 'Just 10 steps...'
9
Tell me
8
Tell me to stay
7
Tell me that you're back to my Kakashi
6
Tell me that you still love me
5
"Goodbye...Kakashi," Iruka's voice choked at saying his name. Even up to the very last moment, he had wanted Kakashi to love him, to tell him that the past 3 years was not a nightmare and that he would make it up to him. He had wanted to hear Kakashi tell him that everything would be okay and they would still be together.
But he hadn't. He didn't even move and try to stop him. He was letting him go.
With barely contained tears, 4, 3, 2, 1, and Iruka was out of the suffocating house. Then, with a quick exhale, he did the hand signs and teleported away, to the gates where Naruto and Jiraiya would be waiting for him.
...We're going down, And you know that we're doomed. My dear, We're slow dancing in a burning room...
How this story started: Well, I started reading fanfics again and was reading Naruto fanfics. & as I like Yaoi couples, my favorite in Naruto is Kakashi & Iruka, so I love Kakashi & Iruka stories. So I thought I would like to try writing something for them. I would've like to write a happy story for them, but, this story was inspired by the song Slow Dancing In A Burning Room by John Mayer. Well, I was listening to Tyler Ward's version of it when I thought of this, but yeah. Thus, this story formed.
Well, if you haven't read my Author's Note above, read it now please.
& let's hope I get the Kakashi's POV up soon.
&& whoops...this turned out shorter than I thought. Egah. Sorry about that...I was typing it on my e-mail...anyways,
Review if you like; if you don't like...well, please be polite if you do review. ^^;; As I said, it's been a while...