Ha… really shouldn't be writing this .-." I can't promise regular updates because I have a billion other fanfictions to be writing for plus school and all my extra stuff that comes with it.

Disclaimer: Would I really be writing this if I owned Vocaloid? Oh, and I don't own the cover photo- got that from the tumblr blog "fuckyeahlen/rin" (go look. Pretty awesome pics).

It always starts with fire, the fire that took my parents lives, the fire my mother started intentionally, falling into the pits of despair after realizing that my father had been cheating on her.

I watch my summer house burn down with my parents inside, and feel the dry heaves that come with it. The tears still refuse to come out, so I'm left feeling the inability to breath.

And then, through the fire, comes a taxi.

My taxi.

As usual, I take the driver's seat. I'm used to this. I know what happens next- also that's not saying that I like it, or have accepted what is to happen. And, no matter how hard I try, I can't wake up until it's all over.

In comes in a man. He doesn't even need to say anything, he just points a gun at my head. I already know where we are headed, so I begin driving as the scene morphs from the beachside to the big city. He says words, but I block them out. I try to not look at his perverted grin in the mirror, try not to notice the lustful glint in his eyes.

I pull up at an empty apartment complex, the only place that I know to be completely empty at all times. I consider fighting when the gun presses against my head again. I know I can't after all.

He get's on top of me.

My screams wake up the rest of the house.

"Rin! Rin, it's okay. It's a dream, all just a dream," Miku says, trying frantically to calm me down as I thrash around in the bed. I force myself to stop and then cover my eyes with my hands as the tears start coming out. I feel bad that I always rob Miku and the children of sleep when I don't have my sleep medication, my screams always waking them up. We all have our nights- the ones where our screams wake up the rest of the house- but mine are the most frequent.

"I got you some water, Rin," Yuki says, handing me the glass. I take it and drink it gratefully as Oliver comes over and pats my arm- his way of cheering me up.

"Thank you. Sorry. I'm sorry," I say, wiping the tears away.

I hate how I'm trapped in the past. I hate how I can't move on.

"It's okay, Rin," Yuki says sweetly, and Oliver nods his head. Neither are my actual children, but I still think of them as my own. We took them in when they were ten, and raised them up from there. Both are sixteen now. Both have pasts as scarred as Miku's and my own, although Yuki's is easily the worst. I remember the first words she said- asked, technically- to me:

"What kind of cell do your parents put you?"

Her words were so innocent, as if she didn't know exactly what she was asking.

It still sends shivers down my back.

"Do you want us to stay until you fall asleep?" Miku asks. Miku's a year younger than me, and struggles to accomplish her dream of becoming a singer. We've been friends since my junior year of high school, her sophomore, although we didn't become that close until she moved in with me.

I shake my head and say, "No. You have a gig tomorrow, and the children have school. Go back to sleep. I'll be fine." Everyone looks unsure, but they all know better than to push me. As soon as they leave the room, I get out of bed and walk over to the balcony. My room is the only one with a balcony, but everyone agreed to let me have it since I'm the one who brings in the most money.

The air is cold and smells sweet- like honeysuckle, probably from the bushes at the front of the house. It's still dark, which leads me to wonder what time it is. Probably around three or four. I sigh again and then sit down, resting my head on the side of the balcony. I stay there until I see the sun rising in the distance.

At the age of twenty-one, most people would suspect that a girl like me would be partying in her college dorm. Instead, I have a total of three part time jobs, all needed to support my makeshift family. Even that isn't enough, though, and Miku has to pitch in some money. She tells me to take as much as I want, but I take as much as I need, no more, no less.

My first job isn't that bad. With it's flexible hours, working in a bakery isn't as bad as one would think it would be. Not only that, the owners, Teto and Ted Kasane, also give me free bread. Most of the time I work the cashier and clean up, although I sometimes do help Teto cook a cake if needed. They're nice people.

My second job is help out at an old family friend's bar. It's not that bad, and I've known Meiko, the owner, since I was born, so she's especially nice to me. Usually I try to get out of there before rush hour, although sometimes I do need to stay to help out. Miku often performs there. She's even made me sing there once, not that I really minded. Once upon a time, my dream was to be a singer, too.

During the day, when I'm out, Miku usually takes care of the kids. When they're at school, she usually sings at an odd location, taking her trusty guitar with her. I try to arrive home before the kids to see them and eat dinner with them, but that doesn't always work.

And finally, after dinner, I have my worst job.

Being a taxi driver.

I used to like the job. It was relaxing, and although I did get my bad clients, it was also fun talking to the nicer people.

And then the incident happened.

"Oy, I'm leaving for now," I say as I put on my fingerless gloves and red scarf, which was a gift from Meiko. I got it after the fire, and have kept it since. "If you go out, make sure to bundle up. It's cold out there."

"When will you be back?" Yuki asks.

"Uh, I'll try to be back before midnight. Don't stay up for me, though, okay? Young children need their sleep."

"Rin! Come on, we're only five years younger than you," Yuki says with a pout, although she knows I'm kidding. Oliver rolls his eyes while I ruff his hair affectionately. He doesn't talk. Yuki said that he used to, but things happened, and he decided to cut that way of communication off with the world.

"Be nice to each other. Better yet, don't be nice. I don't want to hear that we're going to have another child in the house," I say with a meaningful glare. They were practically dating, and with Miku and I gone at night, I could only worry about what they would do. Yuki turned bright red as Oliver rolled his eyes for the second time. "Okay, I'm leaving," I said after securing my jacket.

"Bye Rinny! Come back soon," Yuki says while Oliver waves wildly. I smile at them and then begin walking to the station where my taxi is.

It's a slow night, probably because it's so cold outside. There's a sweet, yet lonely old lady who tells me about her husband, who died in the last war. I drop her off at her destination without making her pay. Then there's a pair of fiance's who are probably eloping. None of my business. Those were the only two before he showed up.

"Taxi!" He screams while trying to wave me down. I sigh when I see them together- a man around my age with a women who's clearly drunk. It's obvious what they plan on doing for the rest of the night. As long as they don't do anything in my cab, I'm fine.

"Where to?" I ask as they get in together. The women giggles at me and then whispers something to the man. He smirks, and then says, "My place." He gives me his address, which is in the nicer part of town, and I begin driving.

The man speaks in a low, seductive voice, while the lady giggles and plays with his blonde ponytail. I try to not notice anything in the mirrors, try to block off the noise coming from them.

It begins snowing.

"Could you turn the heat up a little? It's getting cold," the man says, smirking at me.

"Oh, I c-can warmth youd up," the woman says, her words slurred.

She grabs a "certain area" of his pants and suddenly they're trying to devour each other.

I begin to remember.

Gun to my head.

Slow whisper, telling me to take him to a deserted area.

Hands that don't keep to himself.

"Out," I snap, pulling over.

"What? It's snowing, you can't do that," the man says. "I won't pay."

"I don't give a fuck, just get out of my taxi. Now," I say.

"Why?" He mocks. "Little girl can't handle a little action?" I finally look at him in the mirror.

Surprisingly, we look alike. He's got blonde hair like mine, and we've both got blue eyes.

His eyes… they have that same lustful look.

I'm about to vomit.

"Wait, don't tell me… You still a virgin?" He asks, a devious smirk playing on his lips.

I force my voice to be strong, force myself to not begin trembling. "Technically, no."

"'Technically'? What, didn't like the first guy you did it with? Go home crying to mommy?"

It's like he knows my past and enjoys rubbing it in my face.

"Get away from me," I say, shoving the blondie as far away as I can. "I don't need shit from strangers I don't even know." With that I drive away.

I hate people like that. I hate people who just jump to conclusions. And, I hope I never see him, whoever he is, again.

And of course I don't get what I want.

"Rin!" Meiko says the next day, grabbing me by the shoulders as before I can walk out of her bar. "Please, please, please work overtime! I'll pay you double, plus your usual pay. It's just that both Neru and Lily had to cancel their shifts today, and I can't call anyone else in. Is that okay?" I really don't want to, but Meiko's an old family friend. And, of course, the pay is good.

"I'll do it," I say. "But just this once. I don't like working when the bar is open." Which may sound weird, but it's true. Grinding bodies, alcoholics… I don't like stuff like that. I just help Meiko clean up and get everything ready for the upcoming night, which may not sound like a lot, but things can get pretty crazy here….

"Great! It'll be you, me, Dell, and Miku, taking on the world! Although Miku's just going to be singing, so I guess that just makes you and me and Dell against everyone… We can do it, though! We can persevere!"

"Yay?" I say, stating it more like a question than an actual statement.

"Anyways, all you will have to do is wait tables while I work the bar and Dell does everything else." I nod my head and then pull out my cell phone and call home. It's answered in the first ring.

"Hey!"

"..." All I hear on the other end is breathing. Creepy.

"Oliver, give the phone to Yuki," I say, rolling my eyes. I hear some shuffling and then Yuki says brightly, "Hey, Rinny!"

"Hello, Yuki. I just wanted to let you know that I'm going to be home late today. I need to help Meiko out at her bar." They've all meet Meiko before. "There is some money in the first draw of the counter that you can use to buy yourself something to eat," I say, knowing that Yuki will know exactly what draw I'm talking about.

"It's fine, Rinny. We can just eat leftovers." I feel a little sad for some reason when she says that, but I say, "Okay," anyways. "I'll see you at home," Yuki says.

"Don't stay up! I'll see you tomorrow morning, okay?"

"Maybe." She hangs up before I can say anything. I roll my eyes, knowing that that meant that she would end up staying up with Oliver just to say hi to me.

"Okay, first things first. Rin, you cannot wear that," Meiko says, rolling her eyes.

"I don't have much better," I say, knowing that my faded jeans and gray hoodie must look bad on me. But, they serve their purpose and keep me warm, so that's what matters.

"When was the last time you bought yourself new, pretty clothing?" I shrug. I always let Miku and the kids buy new clothing. I don't have anyone to impress, like the kids, and a rising star can't wear clothing like mine, can she?

"I may have some things that may fit you…." Meiko says.

"No revealing clothing," I say, not wanting any male to get any ideas. And, I love Meiko to death, but wearing a short skirt and a tube top is a bit slutty to me. She says it draws in customers, so I guess it works, but there is no way I'm comfortable wearing something like that.

"Fine, be a bore," she says. I roll my eyes as she passes me a pair of dark jeans, black high-tops, and a black shirt advertising her bar. "You know where the bathrooms are," Meiko says. I change quickly, but I leave my scarf on.

"Okay, since it's only seven, we obviously aren't going to get any customers. Eat dinner until then," Meiko says. I nod my head as she sets a bowl of soup and a cheese sandwich out for me.

"Meiko, I'm here," Miku says as she walks into the bar, guitar on her back. I don't see her enter, since my back is to the door, but I recognize the voice. "Rin! What are you doing here?"

"Working," I say before taking a spoonful into my mouth.

"Will you sing a duet with me?"

"No."

"Please?"

"Nope."

"I'm begging you."

"Nein."

She sighs. "One day, Rin Kagamine. One day."

"I look forward to that day." I take another bite, allowing my insides to warm up. "Dell, everything's delicious."

"Of course it is," Dell says, popping his head out of the kitchen. I laugh as the door opens, letting cold air into the bar.

"Hey, Meiko, Miku," an oddly familiar voice says, greeting my friends. "Who's this blonde chick?"

"That would be-" I say, turning around, but cut myself off immediately when I see who it is.

Blondie. Of course.

"Oh! It's the Bitter Virgin Taxi Driver!"

Meiko drops the glass that she was cleaning while Miku turns to him with wide eyes, her expression a mixture of anger and confusion.

I stare at him blankly, trying to force images back down.

"What? Nothing to say? Come one, girlie. You had such a big mouth last night. Lost all your confidence? Why don't you go to Mommy for that, too."

"SHUT UP!" Miku screams, furious. She grabs the black vest that he's wearing and pins him up against the wall. "Don't speak as if you know what you're talking about. I swear, I will kill you, Len Kagamine- regardless of status. You know I can." The words come out in a hiss.

"Leave him, Miku. He doesn't know what he's talking about," I say, trying to act casual but probably failing. She refuses to let him go, though, so a blue-haired man comes and picks her up, much to her anger.

"Len, don't speak to her like that. Ever," Meiko says, picking up the pieces of glass that came from the glass she dropped.

"Hello, Kaito," Meiko says, looking up from her work for a second.

"Meiko," The blue-haired man, Kaito, says.

"Asshole," Miku says, face straight to Kaito, turning her attention away from Len.

"Diva," He responds. They both nod as if there is some sort of deep, personal message behind those words. Weird.

"What's up with this chick," Len says. "For Miku to get pissed, of all people. I understand Meiko, but Miku…."

"Shota-boy, I'll say this to you now: don't speak as if you know a person's life story," I say. I then slide my plate across the bar, half the sandwich left. "Meiko, I'm done."

"Already?"

"I lost my appetite."

The door opens and the first drinkers of the night enter Meiko's bar. She forces the sides of her lips upwards and then gives them a greeting.

"Listen, girl. Do you know who I am?" Blondie- Len, did Meiko and Miku say?- asks.

"Nope, and quite frankly, I'm not interested."

"Len Kagamine's the name." He says this with a certain amount of swagger I really don't appreciate.

"Am I supposed to be impressed? If you're some sort of celebrity hot-shot, or something, don't expect me to know you. The only relatively famous person I know is Miku." I get off my stool and steach. "Oi, Dell. Have anythin' for me to do?" I call out to him, but he gives a gruff, "No," so I end up sitting back down.

Kagamine is staring at me, a surprised expression on his face. "Well, I recommend you show me some respect. I am, after all, the richest, not to mention youngest and hottest, business tycoon in our big city."

"Well, I recommend you show the average, hard-worker such as myself a little decency instead of walking around as if you own the world."

"I practically do."

"Len, stop pestering her already!" Miku says as she tunes her guitar. She gives it a little strum and then deems it satisfactory.

"Oh, come on, Miku. I'm not pestering her!"

"Oh yes you are. Take a seat at a booth and leave me alone already." Kagamine leaves me in peace just as Meiko calls my name.

The entire night I just think about how much I want to see the kids at home. I don't want to have to deal with drunk flirts, their lustful grins reminding me of his from a time not too long ago.

Kagamine stays for a long while, and every once-in-a-while I catch him watching me, only to have him smirk and then continue on with his conversation with one of his numerous lady friends. There are at least six drunk girls sitting at his booth, and more keep on coming in.

Miku's singing gains many cheers from the audience. She occasionally duets with Kaito, or even Meiko, but she mostly sings by herself, her words laced with depth and meaning.

I suddenly hear my name as the night wears on.

"I would not like to call Rin Kagamine, my bestest friend, up to the stage for a duet!"

She did not just do that.

I duck a little, yell, "Rin Kagamine declines!" and move before the crowd can notice me. Most are drunk, so my getaway goes relatively smoothly.

That is until a certain asshole, who happens to have the same last name as me, grabs my arm. I automatically flinch and pull my arm away from him, not liking the touch of a male on my skin.

"Is this her?" Kagamine asks, words slurred. I glare at him, but it goes unnoticed. However, I do notice the stares of open hatred of the girls who are with him point at me.

"Yup!" The crowd parts a path so I have no choice but to go to the stage.

"I hate you," I mumble to Kagamine before letting out a long stage.

"This is Rin, everyone!" Miku says once I reach the stage. The crowd lets out a cheer, but I just stand there, not waving, not smiling.

"CAN I HAVE YOUR NUMBER?" Comes a shout from the crowd.

"Oh-ho, none of that," Miku says. She sounds cheerful, but the look in her eyes tells the crowd that she's serious. She then turns the mic away and whispers to me. "Please, Rin?"

"Seeing that I'm already up here, I have no choice."

"SWEET! It'll be like when we were in high school!" I smile a little at those words, remembering the days when we grabbed a hair brush, or remote, and sang along to whatever anime opening we were watching, an extravagant- and stupid- dance to go along with it. Then we would flop onto Miku's bed and discuss which celebrity we would want to date first after we became famous. Those were the days.

A melody begins playing- one that I recognize to be the song "Promise," a duet Miku wrote herself. I sigh, but allow myself to be swept up into the music.

It's always nice to be singing. There's only one time when I'm completely okay with myself, and that's when I'm singing. I don't do it much, though, because my voice reminds myself of my mother.

The song ends and I try to smile at the crowds applause, although I don't really feel it. Now I regret coming up here; I feel like I betrayed my secret system of doing nothing to remind myself of my parents, my cowardly mother in particular.

The crowd cheers for an encore, but I give a small smile and walk off stage. Pats on my back and the empty words "nice job" doesn't mean anything to me, so when people tell me that I don't say anything, nor feel any burst of pride like a normal person probably would.

"You're good at singing," a voice slurs into my ear. I let out a little shriek and jump out, almost spilling the drink- cherry juice, surprisingly- I'm taking to booth number nine.

"How many times do I need to say this? Leave me alone, Kagamine," I say before setting the drink onto the table with a fake smile. My hand doesn't leave it entirely.

He leans in close and grabs my scarf, fiddling with it a little, and trying to pull me close. "I think I fell in love with that voice." He grabs my arm. I try to pull it out of his grip, but he's too strong. "Let's get out of here, yeah?"

Lustful eyes.

A sneer, telling me that he obviously believes himself to be superior.

A hand that refuses to let go.

"Let go of me," I shriek, my grip tightening on the cherry juice. Without thinking I dump the contents onto his head.

He instantly sobers up, disbelief written all over his face. "I warned you Kagamine," I say with a trembling voice. I force my hands to stop shaking.

"Are you retarded?!" He screams before realizing he's causing a scene. The conversation and laughter have faded and people openly stare. Miku's even stopped singing. "Follow me." He's walking outside. I don't move, afraid of what he does, so he grabs my hand and forces me to follow him. I strain but don't manage to break free.

"Do you know how much these clothes cost?" Kagamine asks as soon as we're outside. I shrug ever so slightly.

"You could always get the stains out."

"No, I really couldn't. This fabric isn't the kind you can be rough with."

"I'm sure it wasn't that much money."

He raises his hand, I feel like he's going to slap me. Sure enough, he ends up swinging downwards, but stops his hand right in front of my face, holding out all five fingers.

"Five hundred thousand Yen."

No way.

"Are you going to pay me back?"

"I-I don't h-have that kind of money," I say, eyes wide. I can barely manage since all of my money goes into supporting my makeshift family.

"Of course you don't," Kagamine says with a sneer. "So guess what that makes you?"

"What?"

"My personal taxi driver."

Ta-da! End of chapter one. Hope you enjoyed.

And, if you did, make sure to leave a review 'cause I only continue a fanfiction if I get at least one review. Arigatou!