"It was pretty dire."
he said, baiting the conversation casually.
The rhythym of typing
remained unceasing. The baiting hadn't worked.
"Sort of like that
old tv show. Or the movie, the one with Luis Guzman." A different
tactic tried.
Slight pause in the click
of keys.
One bat captured, which
was pretty impressive. All things considered. Tim shrugged not caring
that they had their backs to each other and shifted his history notes
into a more uniform clutter.
"Well, I took a
pretty bad knock to the head. My fault, I know. But when I came to,
Gar was still out to lunch and Cassie and Kon were nowhere to be
found."
A creak in a chair. Two
taps. Control. Save.
"The Weather Wizard
has got a new costume. It's a lot flashier than before." Tim
goes on. The conversational tone is unwavering. It's unlike the chat
held with Superboy after the incident.
"Oh,
as if the green tights are any different?"
"Shut
up or I'll shut you up with Kryptonite you git."
And the inescapable blur of a speedster pointing out the obvious variances in Tim and Dicks' attire.
But Batman is a different
audience. There was something about black pots reserved for mention
if Bruce remarked on the tights.
Silence. Well timed, it
lasted in the air above them long enough for Tim to chop his various
pages and hear the distant chirp of an airborn rodent.
"I immediately
thought about the Guzman series when I noticed that I had my hands
shackled above me. Weather Wiz was watching Gar and myself with his
arms crossed and in that classic pose. The kind you only expect to
see on tv...ten years ago."
The first wave of mental
images were just too much to dismis short of a grin.
"Holy
high kicks Gar! How will we get out of this one?"
The bump on
Gar's head had not been lonely with the oddly purple bruise next to
it.
"Honestly, I had the hardest time keeping a straight face when the Wiz announced that our 'feeble attempts at stopping his take-over had ended'." Tim didn't stop to consider how bad his Weather Wizard impersonation had been. "It sort of ruined the effect when Gar woke long enough to complain about Wiz's incessant racket. Wiz got so mad. It gave me time to unlock my right hand unnoticed."
Distraction.
There had always been a distraction of some sort.
"Oh
Weather Wizard. How did you come up with such an infallible scheme!"
"Boy
Wonder, it was easy..."
And ten
minutes could be devoted to security issues revolving around the bad
guys' self-esteem complex. If that failed, Batman would always show
up in the nick of time...
"He came in real close to shake BB up a little, which I've failed to point out that he was in shackles too and that's a poor move for the obvious reasons. I think Gar was also seeing the same phoney plot devices at work and he was quick to bring them up."
"You'll
never get away with this Weather Wizard!"
Wiz stopped
short and had frowned. Tim, behind the mask, snorted.
"We never did find out what he was up to because that was about when I got my other arm free and Gar changed long enough to slip loose."
"I'll
take care of Weather Wizard."
"I'll
turn off his machine Robin!"
Two
hits before eyes were rolling back.
"POW."
"MINT!"
Something was missing.
"Gee
golly Robin, that was a close one!"
"Well,
the world may never fear badly dressed super villians again shall
they?"
"Not
with Boy Wonder and guest hero Garfield Logan around to stop them!"
The typing had not
resumed.
"You know, I think
Wayne Enterprises did more harm than good in sanctioning the Batman
hour. It's a bad influence on criminals."
If Tim would never hear
the end of it from Kon or Bart, why should Bruce be exempt?
With their backs still
turned, Tim couldn't be sure if Batman had rolled his eyes, looked
back at him stupidly, or merely grinned. Whatever his response, it
did not last long. The clatter of keys began anew and Tim took the
cue to return back to his notes.
He wondered if it was not too late to join media studies.
Authors Notes:
Cool. Fanfiction changed the update layout.
After writing "Theories", a short fun fic, lots of people asked I keep up with short humourous stories. Um...that problem being that I'm not naturally funny. But I gave it another try. This was done on scrap in an hour. Redone in lj. I hope this lives up to "Theories".
I stole some names from the graphic novel JLA: Welcome To The Working Week. It's a good comic. Go read it, yo!
