A special thanks to Jessica and Marcus for being my beta's on this fic. I really appreciate the help.
Disclaimers: I dont own csi or the character and I do not intend to make any money from these writings.
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I watch her from distance as she dance with Warrick. She is so beautiful and her body moves with such a grace that it's heartbreaking. Her dress is long and red and you can see that it hugs just at the right places. Her hair is curled and tied on the top of her head in a very graceful way. She has left a few hairs loose in front and in the back that were just as lovely as everything on her. I wish it was me dancing so close, smelling her perfume and caring my hand on her back.
It's the Police Annual ball and although I hate parties there was no way I could be able to stay out of this one. 'Every CSI has to attend at the ball; no excuses' said in the invitation. While dressing myself for this, I made a promise to try and have fun, even if I just have to watch people have fun, especially Catherine, but it's getting harder and harder to watch. After Warrick it is Grissom's time to conduct Miss. Willows through the dance floor.
I grab my drink and am about to get out of the room when Nick stops me.
"Hey there, having a great time?"
"Of course, who wouldn't enjoy such great music and food?" I say sarcastically.
"Don't forget the drinks" he says with a smile. I nod and look away. "So, find anyone interest here?"
"Yes…" I answer without thinking. "Unfortunately the person is completely out of my hands"
"Why do say that, and who the lucky guy is?" he asks looking to the crew. I look at Nick, not understanding how he can think I like guys when I clearly prefer women.
"You know what Nick, just forget about it. It isn't happening anyway." Excusing myself I go the terrace to get some fresh air. I don't want to talk about her and I sure don't like getting too emotional around so many people.
I take a deep breath and look at the sky. It is clean and full of stars. I even see a shooting star which makes me smile. "Make a wish" says a voice behind me. I close my eyes for a moment. I don't have to turn around to know who it is. I switch my weight from one foot to the other and hold onto the balcony. Why now? Why did she have to come to me now? "I didn't see you dancing" she says, getting closer.
"Probable because I didn't. I don't like dancing"
"You don't like to or you don't know how to do it?"
"Does it matter?"
"It matters to me." Catherine answers; resting her back on the balcony and looking at me. I look into her vivid blue eyes and then away.
"I guess both" I say turning around to leave.
"Would you like me to teach you?" Her voice is so full of caring that it makes my knees weak.
"Cat, I don't think…" but she cuts me off by putting a hand on my back and pulling me closer to her. The other hand grabs mine and she start moving slowly.
"Do you ever wondered why you can call me Cat and no one else can?" I shake my head and look at her eyes. "It sounds beautiful when you say it" I blush furiously and look down, now trying to mesmerize her step. "One to the left, two to the right, and turn. Like this"
"Oops, I'm so sorry"
"It's okay, let's try again and don't look down."
"But I don't wanna step in your foot."
"You won't. Trust me on this. Can you do that?"
"Yes." I say, blushing.
"Close your eyes if it helps you to focus on my moves, and only my moves. Let me be your man, and remember: I'm right here to catch if you fall" I nod and rest my head on her so I can try doing what she told me. I can smell her hair, strawberries I think, and something different, something sweet and fresh and good. Can it be her perfume or just her unique scent.
She caresses my back and I can feel the heat emanating from the place she touched, reaching other parts of my body.
I only realize the music ended when she steps away from me and I miss her body instantly. I put a few hairs behind my ear as I look at her, blushing. "Thank you,"
"You don't dance so bad Sara. I think you just needed to find the right partner to do it" she says with a smile. I can't help but smile back. She kisses my cheek and disappears back to the room. My right hand unconsciously reaches the place her lips touched and I sigh deeply.
I turn to find her again but only to see Nick resting at the door frame with a big smirk on his face.
"Out of your hands, huh? It didn't seem like that to me."
"She was just teaching me how to dance. It was nothing."
"If you like her go find her and say it. I know Catherine, she won't laugh or be uncomfortable, and she may say yes."
"There is no way she will want me when she can have practically anyone," I say going to the balcony again. "And I'm not getting my hopes up just to be dismissed and be hurt again. I can't" Nick step closer and put a hand on mine.
"This was the first time she made the first step and actually chose someone to dance with. And she chose you" I open my mouth to argue but he continues "She danced with the others because they asked her to and she is their friends. Besides, I never saw her blushing the way she did while dancing with you."
"Were you watching us?" Now it was Nick's turn to blush.
"I just wanted to see if you were okay" he confesses. "I have being watching you tonight and well, after the way you spoke it was clear that you weren't having fun"
"Why were you watching me?"
"Honestly? I always wanted to have something more than friendship with you Sara, and until tonight I thought I had a chance because of the 'Grissom thing'"
"I never like him that way Nick. I admire him yes, but never want a relationship with him"
"What about the night you asked him to dinner?"
"You heard about that?" Nick nod a 'yes'. "I was broken. I had a very hard case and I wanted someone to talk to. It was nothing more but that. And I'm sorry if I never realized you had a thing for me. I just…"
"Was focused on someone else?"
"What great friend I am huh? I'm sorry."
"Its okay Sara. It is not like I was explicit, really. Anyway, go find her and tell her the truth"
"I don't know, what if…"
"No 'if's' Sara, I will not let you waste the opportunity of being happy with someone you love and that loves you back. She is just as afraid as you are"
"Catherine is afraid? On come on, she is the 'queen of self-confidence.'"
"No one is when it comes to feelings, especially this one. And Catherine, she is just as human as everyone else in that room" He points it out to make his point. But there was no need, his eyes already show that. I nod with a smile and plant a kiss on his cheek saying 'thanks' before entering. I look around the room but don't find her anywhere.
"I think I saw her going to the ladies room" Brass says.
"Thanks. Excuse me"
Making through the couples and the bar I finally reach the bathroom. I open the door feeling butterflies on my stomach. She is there, correcting her make-up but when she sees me closer she stops. She has been crying and I confess I never thought I would see this day, the day that Catherine Willows would be feeling weak. She is always so strong, so confident, sure of what she is and what she wants. But I would be lying if I said she isn't just as beautiful as any other time. I walk closer to her and after checking if the sink is wet or not, I rest my back looking at her the way she did with me, minutes ago. She doesn't look me in the eyes – like I didn't – instead, she put everything back on her make-up kit. When she tries to leave I stop her.
"Do you know why I always call you Cat?" I ask whispering. She shakes her head. "Because it makes me believe we have intimacy, like I always wanted".
"Intimacy?"
"And then you smile… I don't know if you notice but you do, and you have no idea what your smile does to me Cat" I see her eyes close and she change her feet's. I like to have that kind of affect on her.
I caress her right cheek making her look at me again; I slowly reach for her lips and my touch is simple at first, totally innocent. I step back for a second to be sure she won't run away from me and when she doesn't, I kiss her again, playing with both lips, one at a time, wining a moan in response. I put my tongue inside her mouth and finally am able to taste her, like I have been waiting for so long. Catherine doesn't take long to respond into the kiss as she presses herself even more into my body and our tongues battle for dominance. I push her against the wall behind and Catherine breaks the kiss.
"It's cold" she explains.
"Oh, I'm sorry" I say staring at her eyes.
"I'm not, not really" she says closing her arms behind my neck and with one hand, pulling my head on hers. We kiss, long and passionate and I can't help but let my hands travel her body, pulling the dress up. When my hand finds her soft skin under it, we both moan.
"You know," I say before moving my mouth to her neck kissing it "I couldn't take my eyes off of you all night, even if I wanted to. I was having a very hard time watching everyone else touching you, being with you expected me" I whisper between kisses, and then suck on her ear lobe.
"You were not… the only one having a hard time tonight…" she says as I move my mouth south
"Oh really?" I ask kissing her pulse point before biting gently.
"Oh God" I smile making her know I like that and lick the mark shin.
"Everyone else was touching me, except who I want the most, you" she whisper "And when I saw you alone in the moonlight… wearing this long and beautiful white dress I… I couldn't resist the urge to be with you"
"I'm glad because I don't think I would have the courage to come to you" I move my mouth to her lips before giving the other side of her neck the same treatment. "God Cat, you taste so good and your skin feels so… great" I say, pinching her butt.
"Oh Jesus Sara… You make me want you so much"
At those words I kiss her hard and deep, showing how much I want her too. Catherine pulls one leg around my back, trying to push me closer. I know what she wants and I'm willing to give it to her. I pull her dress up a little bit and put my right leg between hers. My hand instinctively scratches her thigh as Catherine starts rocking herself on my thigh and I have to say, it's the sexiest thing in the world.
A voice in my head says I shouldn't be doing this here, in the middle of the ladies room but in a nice, comfortable bed where I can work on her, show just how precious she is to me. "Please, don't be mad at me" I whisper stepping back.
Catherine blinks, her eyes full of tears. "How can I be mad at you, when you just treat me like a real woman, Sara? Not just a body you can use and throw away in the end?"
"I could never do that to you Cat. Ever. Not when I have been watching you for so long and, falling more for you each day."
"Falling? You mean you are… in love with me?" I don't know if she is happy or not about this so I look away before nodding a 'yes'. I step back but this time she stops me, by grabbing my face with both hands and pulling me for a long kiss. I remain with my eyes close even after we broke apart. "I think we should get out of here, before someone comes looking for us"
"I don't think Nick will let that happen" she looks at me with an eyebrow up and I laugh.
"Long story, but I do want to get out of this building" I held the door open to Catherine and we go take our coats at the entrance. With my hand placed softly at her back, we go to the elevator and then to the street.
"I don't think I'm ready to call the night yet, if it's ok with you"
"No problem, where do you wanna go?" I say grabbing her arm "A walk in the park… a coffee place?"
"The park isn't safe at this hour. And I sure don't want to lose you now"
"Good thinking"
"How about my place, I can make us some coffee?"
"I think I prefer a coffee shop, no offense"
"If I didn't know you better I'd start thinking you are not attracted to me…" she says hugging my arm with both of hers. She has this beautiful smile on the face that makes me re-think the idea for a second. But I will not change my mind.
"We lost too much time fighting instead of talking, Cat. I'd like to know more about you now"
"Ok. What do want to know? Ask me and I'll tell everything"
"Everything?" I frown. Catherine nods with a smile.
"No matter what the subject is, I promise I'll answer with nothing but honesty. But, will you do the same to me?" I open my mouth to answer but close seconds later. When she doesn't say anything, I know I have to speak.
"I can talk about lots of things but there are a few that involve my life, my past, that are a little bit complicated. I'll need some time before actually discussing it"
"I think that's fine" She answers. It was so fast that I have to stop and look at her to be sure I heard correctly. "I'll wait Sara, as long as it takes, I promise"
While we wait for the car, I rest against the wall and pull her closer so she can warm me a little bit.
"I'm glad we finally got to short this out Sara. It was killing me"
"I know the feeling" I say leaning for a kiss. But Catherine has other plans and pulls her head away. I try again and again she left me with nothing. "That's not how it's supposed to go Cat".
"Really? I thought every person was free to tease the ones they love" she answers with a smirk on the face before kissing me. A loud cough is heard, not far from us, and we break apart. I let go of her and walk her to the car.
"Follow me?"
"Wherever you wanna go babe" I laugh at her face and kiss her soft lips once before heading to my car.
Thinking about it now, I'm actually happy that everyone was forced to come to this party. I came here as a single woman and I left with the woman I have been dreaming for a long time. This couldn't be better.
The end