I don't own Naruto. If I did, it would actually make sense or something crazy like that. Maybe the main character might even have his name in the title.

New poll! Once I'm done with either Children of the Cloud or Demon Brothers of Konoha, I'll start on the next fic. You decide! Go to my profile and vote NOW!

Note: Here is yet another oneshot. I seem to be doing quite a few of these lately, can't seem to focus on my long fics.

This chapter basically disregards everything that happens after Chapter 480 or so. Just one possibility at the end of the final fight between Naruto and Sasuke.

In case you haven't read any of my other fics, I'm not exactly the biggest Sasuke fan. I just happen to share certain traits with him such as paranoia, dementia, hair color, and badassness. I also own a possibly-not-legal sword. Cosplay, anyone?

8/8/10

Naruto and Sasuke stood facing each other, both panting. It was to be expected, given that they had been fighting for roughly the last 20 hours. Both were showing signs of exhaustion. With his Eternal Mangekyo Sharingan, Sasuke was able to use Amaterasu and Susanno without limits. He was also able to use Kamui, although he was not very accurate with it, having only recently acquired it. Finally, he was able to completely suppress any trace of the Kyuubi no Kitsune's chakra. All in all, it was a very hard fight for Naruto.

Naruto hadn't made it easy for Sasuke either. He had finally mastered a new version of the Rasengan. Basically, it was a small scale Rasenshuriken that he could throw like ordinarily shuriken, except they only did roughly the same damage as a Odama Rasengan. He was also in Sage Mode for the entire fight, having learned to absorb natural energy at any time, enhancing his speed, strength, and constitution tremendously. Lastly, he had finally mastered his own version of Hiraishin, allowing him to teleport around the battlefield to wherever he placed a seal. Even though Sasuke's enhanced Sharingan gave him near-instant reactions, it was hard to avoid Naruto's attacks when the instant he saw them were nearly the same instant it hit.

As a result, the fight was nearly even.

"Reminds us *pant pant* of the old times, ne, Sasuke?"

"Hn. I…actually didn't think *pant pant* you'd make me work this hard to beat you without the Nine-tails."

"I think…*pant pant* it's time to end this fight. I've mastered all three of the techniques my father created. I guess it's time to show you the last one."

Naruto closed his eyes and focused. He made seals, Snake-Boar-Ram-Rabbit-Dog-Rat-Bird-Horse-Snake, finally, he clapped his hands together. Or he tried to.

The instant Naruto closed his eyes and started making handseals; Sasuke used his Sharingan to his full potential. He copied Naruto's handseals perfectly, and the instant before Naruto finished his handclap, Sasuke summoned snakes that wrapped around Naruto's wrist, stopping him. The last Uchiha finished the jutsu instead.

Naruto opened his eyes, a hint of regret in his blue eyes.

"Your jealously and your arrogance are your downfall, Sasuke."

Sasuke laughed maniacally. "Jealous? Of you? Only in your dreams, Naruto." Sasuke felt the power flowing through him, due to this unnamed jutsu. "And here I thought you were smarter than to use actually ninjutsu against me. Didn't you remember, that with these blessed eyes of mine, that I can copy any technique before you even finish it?"

"Didn't you remember, Sasuke, that I'm known for my tricks?" Naruto countered.

Sasuke's eyes widened as he felt something deep inside him turn cold. Ice cold. If he had to describe it, he would call it…

…As cold as death. "Wh-What? What is th-this?"

Naruto smiled sadly. When making handseals, he had been very careful to not use any chakra whatsoever. Sasuke had, and was probably being affected by the jutsu.

"Sasuke…what was the last technique the Yondaime ever used?"

Last technique…Sasuke thought. He supposedly died killing the Kyuubi no Kitsune, but what really happened was that he sealed it into Naruto. To do that, he used the…NO, IT CAN'T BE! Sasuke looked behind him. Right into the eyes of the Shinigami, the god of death himself. "No…" Sasuke whispered a denial.

"Yes, Sasuke. This is Shiki Fūjin. This is my father's last technique. It will be your last technique."

The Shinigami bared its sharpened teeth, and Sasuke felt fear, fear like he had never known before. Through the jutsu, he could feel the entity's hatred, his desire to consume all living things, his rage at being summoned like some toy. Horror was written over Sasuke's as the Shinigami reached forwards and pierced his soul.

"I knew you've always been jealous of my techniques, Sasuke, however much you might try to deny it. First it was Kage Bushin, which you couldn't perform effectively because your chakra reserves aren't large enough. Then it was Rasengan, which used no handseals, so you couldn't copy it with your Sharingan. And I'm not blind. I've seen how you've been staring at my personal Hiraishin seals and kunai." Naruto smiled. "I'm sorry, Sasuke. We were friends, once, but I can't let you destroy my home. You won't be walking away from this fight."

Naruto's words rung with such conviction that Sasuke knew them to be absolutely true. "I may not be able to destroy Konoha, but I'll make sure to bring you down with me." Sasuke said with determination. He rushed forwards, and Naruto, immobilized by the snakes, couldn't move as Sasuke grabbed him by the shoulders. The death god's presence was fused with Sasuke, and the last Uchiha knew exactly what to do to remove Naruto's soul.

The Shinigami's hand plunged out of Sasuke's stomach and into Naruto's. Sasuke willed the hand to close, and it did.

Naruto eye-smiled at him, completely unconcerned with having his soul stripped from his body. He had made his choices already, at this point; nothing either of them could do would change the outcome of the fight. If this was what he had to do to stop Sasuke, so be it.

Sasuke smiled grimly as he started pulling Naruto's soul out. The Shinigami's ethereal hand retracted, pulling out…

…

…

…

…

…

…absolutely nothing.

"Oh? Demo, I'm just a shadow clone. You didn't think I'd actually come all the way out here to fight your pansy ass, did you? Nah, the real me is actually on my honeymoon."

Sasuke had no last words, no scream of denial or words begging for forgiveness. He simply died, a black spiral appearing on his stomach where the Shinigami stripped his soul from his body, to suffer in the belly of death for all eternity.

Naruto woke with a start as the memories of his shadow clone entered his mind. He gave a small, sad sigh. His only regret was that he couldn't save Sasuke from his inner darkness. You just can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved. Sasuke embraced his darkness. It was his choice.

"A-Ano…is s-something wrong, Naruto-kun?" His wife asked quietly, in that soft, loving tone of hers. She would never even begin to get mad at her husband for waking her up, even if it wasn't an accident.

He saw a bit of pink, and a bit of green out of the corner of his eye. "Actually, yes…Hime…why'd you put this back on?" He asked slyly, trailing his hand against her skin.

His wife shivered in anticipation. "Because N-N-Naruto-kun, I know h-how much y-you like uh-uh-undressing me."

"Damn right I do." Naruto lightly nipped his wife's earlobe, causing her to gasp and blush immensely. "Say my name."

"Na…Na-Naru…Naruto-kun!" She stuttered, barely being able to talk as Naruto's fingers worked magic.

The pink lingerie was tossed to the floor at some point, along with the emerald necklace. Naruto forgot about Sasuke pretty quickly after that.

And here's a little lime for you.

Review, pl0x.

(This seems to be the plot of my usual oneshots. Trouble-solution-mourning-sex-happy ending)