Summary: You still love me even after everything that's happened. You almost died because of me and yet you're still by my side. You aren't even scared for your life, only for mine. You love me as I am. Unlike everyone else, you accept both sides of me. You love me unconditionally and that's more than I deserve.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything!
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I still want to hit myself when I think about it. She used you to get to me and I didn't even realize it. I had no idea what she was and neither did you because she had you under her spell. That was something else that I hated. Lori was the only one that saw it. I wolfed out the second I realized that she was right. Not only was that bitch using you so she could kill me, but your life was in danger. It was only jealousy at first, then it was more than that. Once again your life was in danger because of me and I hated myself for it. It's at times like these that I wished I had never become a werewolf, but if I hadn't I never would have known you, and that would be even worse.
I almost lost you that night. I fought her there on that cliff, not knowing that you were dying at that very moment because she had poisoned you. I didn't care if she was a girl, she was not getting away with what she did to you, and she didn't. When I slashed her across the face she stumbled backwards and she fell off of the cliff to her death. I had actually killed someone, but I was too concerned about you to care. You were safe now, or so I thought. I ran to you, wanting to make sure that you were okay, and that was when I knew you weren't. You could barely breathe and you couldn't get up. That was when Lori showed up from wherever the hell she was. We got you to the hospital, but I couldn't be there with you. The wolf wouldn't receed because I was scared. I was scared that I would lose you, the only person that ever completely accepted me. The one person I loved more than anything.
What would I do without you? I'd be lost, and probably be found out. Then what? I'd probably be killed. Nobody would accept me as the wolf, and the only other person that did, that was the only thing they interested in. I know it sounds crazy, but you're all I have. In spite of everything you've always been there for me. I felt like a failiure because I couldn't protect you. I didn't know what she was. I thought that she was just some slutty girl that liked you and, to my dismay, you liked her. Thanks to me she almost killed you just to get to me. I'll never forgive myself for it.
That night I didn't sleep at all. I didn't even try to. I just stayed in my room, the wolf staying out the whole time. It wouldn't go back in until I knew that you were safe, because that fear wouldn't leave me, not until early the next morning when Lori called and told me that you were alright. Finally the fear left me, because now I knew that you were safe... for now at least. Later that day when you came home from the hospital, I hugged you and apologized. I thought I was about to cry. I came so close to losing you because I was too stupid to not see what she really was, and I could never forgive myself for it. You, however, did forgive me. You apologized to me, and you said that it was your own fault because you were blind to the obvious. It could never be your fault. You were the victim while I was the one that was supposed to protect you, and I failed.
That night we were alone together in the lair. I knew what I had to do. Because of me you almost died, and yet you said that this wouldn't keep you from fighting beside me. I knew that you were in danger. We both were. I had to let you know how I felt. You needed to know that I love you before it was too late. I didn't even think. I turned to you and pulled you close. Then without hesitation I pressed my lips against yours and kissed you. You didn't resist. When we broke apart, I said in barely a whisper, "I love you so much..." and when you didn't pull away or freak out at me and instead hugged me and then kissed me again, I knew you felt the same way.
I tried to convince you to stop helping me so you would be safe, but you wouldn't listen. You told me that no matter what happened to you, you would never let me face this alone. I tried fighting behind your back, but you found out and came just in time. I could have been killed, but you saved me. It made me aware of how much I needed you. How much we needed each other. From then on, I knew that I needed you to make it through my battles, but I knew that I had to protect your life at all costs. To this day I won't let myself forget how you almost left me. To this day you still haven't run away.
You still love me even after everything that's happened. You almost died because of me and yet you're still by my side. You aren't even scared for your life, only for mine. You love me as I am. Unlike everyone else, you accept both sides of me. You love me unconditionally and that's more than I deserve. Even three years later not much has changed. We're still best friends, but we're something else, too. We're lovers. My determination to protect you has not faltered in the least. Whenever we're face to face with an enemy the wolf's desire to protect rules. I will never let you come to harm. My instinct to protect my mate over powers me. I would put my own life at risk to make sure you're out of harm's way. You often tell me I'm crazy, and that's true. I'm crazy about you and I could never imagine my life without you. I wouldn't even be alive right now if it wasn't for you.
I love you, Merton. I always have and I always will. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. As I lay here with you in my arms I hope that we'll always be this way. That we'll have all eternity to be together, because I will love you for all eternity.
