Title: The Lonely Mind
Author: caz251
Fandom: Doctor Who
Rating: G
Character/Pairing: 9th Doctor, mentions of the Time Lords and Rose.
Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who, itbelongs to the BBC, unfortunately.
Summary: The Doctor and the loneliness he feels after the time war.
Spoilers: Doctor Who S1 Ep1, S4 Ep12-13 other general spoilers for both new and old!Who.
AN: Written as a comment_fic
It feels so wrong to him, they aren't there, he's never felt that before. Never before in his life has he been cut off in such a way, even when he was banished to earth, he still had the knowledge that he wasn't alone. Then he had Susan with him, it wasn't just him, and he knew that no matter how long he was banished for that when he went home the others would be there for him. Now he'd even welcome seeing the council as mad as they are, even just for them to dole out another punishment, anything to override the silence.
He would never have expected this, him the only remaining time lord, no others out there for him to reach. He couldn't feel any of them, no matter what time he tried, the Time Lords as a whole where never ones to travel but he'd even tried to go to times when he knew they were around, with no such luck. He was the only one left and it was so lonely in his head, he had no connection to the others at all, something that was all his fault. It was his fault that Gallifrey was gone, he was the only one who could have done it so he did. He was responsible for his own pain, he was the one that had created the Time Lock, sealing the Last Great Time War away, and with it the rest of his species.
The silence in his mind was self-imposed, but that didn't stop the feelings that came with it. Knowing that he had done this to himself made it worse, he'd cut himself off from all others like him, he'd come from a war that he'd been in to save peoples lives only to have condemned all the fighters. The loneliness in his mind was just his punishment, one that filled him with recrimination each time he thought about it. He needed a distraction, someone or something to ease the loneliness for a while, the TARDIS tried, but he needed someone he could show how wonderful the universe was, in the hopes that he'd be able to rediscover it as well. The loneliness he felt was eased a bit by the friendship that began with one word, 'Run'.