Disclaimer: Claire, John, Allison, Andrew, Brian, Vernon and Carl do not belong to me they belong to John Hughes, thank you for letting me use them for a while.

Synopsis: Claire has had a rough time of late but she now has to stand on her own. With the 20 year school reunion around the corner, she felt that everything would be in place for it, good husband, good job but it's all in pieces, what will her old friends and breakfast clubbers alike think of her. Hope you enjoy, please read and review.

Shadows of the Past

Chapter 1

Placing and turning the key in the lock of her new residence, Claire Standish made her way into the bare interior of the lake house she had just purchased. She pushed the sky blue door back on its hinges as far as it would go and planted the box that was in her arms on the floor to keep the door from swinging shut. Quickly, she stood aside as the first of her furniture was brought in by the team of removers she had hired to help her move.

It had already been a long day and it wasn't set to get any better, having to instruct the removers exactly where she wanted each box and item of furniture to avoid lifting them later when she was alone, making everyone coffee and a sandwich each after trying to find the box she had packed all of the required ingredients and utensils in and finally, after saying goodbye to the removers and putting her car away in the garage, it was time for her to finally get ready for bed after finding homes for the items she needed in her bedroom and en-suite bathroom.

She removed the ragged grey cable knit sweater, boots and blue jeans that she had been wearing most of the day. Making her way to the bathroom she caught her figure in the long mirror that she had temporarily lent against the wall and sighed. The face of what seemed to be a 45 year old woman, instead of her actual 35 years, looked back at her telling her that the past few months had taken more than their fare share out of her, she only hoped that this break away from society was the tonic she needed to get back to the old Claire, the happy go lucky Claire, the everybody's friend Claire not the shrinking, sullen, subdued woman that now stood before her. She noticed the dark circles around her eyes and the slowly fading bruises on her legs and peeled away her t-shirt to reveal even more faint battle wounds on her abdomen and around her neck, she had been lucky he hadn't killed her.

She traced her fingers lightly over her blemished skin noticing the bright gold band still on her wedding finger, what was she doing? Trying to hold onto the past with all of the lies, deceit and hurt that had come with it? She was here to forget not relive. The trembling fingers of her right hand reached over to her left, momentarily waiting for her to tell them what to do next, before snatching the 24ct ring from her finger and throwing it onto the top of her dresser. It lay there in view for some time before she found the courage to pick it up and place it in one of the drawers.

She looked back at her now nearly naked form in the mirror, the marriage had now gone after receiving her decree absolute, the ring had now gone or it would once she found the courage to take the ring to a jewellers and sell it, and those marks on her body would soon be gone, except for the cigarette burn at the base of her belly. She knew that that would never go always to be a permanent reminder of the things her husband had done to her once he had had that ring on her finger. She startled herself as she brushed her fingers over the scar, would that be what she could expect if she allowed anyone to ever get that close to her again, she wondered. But then that was why she was here, to get away from men.

Turning on her heel she made her way into the bathroom and filled the bath. She sunk into the bubbles once she was ready to and lay there thinking about how she could have picked such a failure for her husband and how she had spent far too searching for his love. She should have made her move years ago, after all the only thing she had to show from it all was the money she had made from her books and the house she now resided in, not that that was bad, but it wasn't quite fulfilling after 10 years of marriage. She had envisaged starting a family as soon as she had taken her vows but complications on his side meant they couldn't have children and he had used that as his first 'excuse' to hit upon her.

She momentarily closed her eyes, drinking in the warm scent of lavender as the warm water lapped around her body soothing her still further. Relaxing into her bath she smiled to herself, 'John would never have done that to me' she thought as lucid images of the dark floppy haired 17 year old teenager in question entered into her head.

She watched as he sauntered into the room, her diamond stud earring winking at her as he took each step toward her peeling off his clothing as he moved ever forward. "Is there room in there for two" he had asked watching her intently, waiting for her response. She simply nodded biting her lower lip as he dealt with the remaining clothing he had on and positioned himself in the bath behind her. His arms snaked around her body pulling her back to lean against him caressing her arms, her tummy ...

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...

...so that once again the only thing they could do was hold, kiss and caress one another.

"How was that for you?" John asked, searching Claire's face for an answer before she had time to answer.

"That was marvellous, fantastic, I could not have imagined experiencing anything as wonderful as I have just experienced with you, how about you?"

"I can honestly say that that was the best sex I have ever had," he joked, "however, I don't think your parents would like to know what the two of us just got up to!"

Claire giggled as she watched him grin. "Thank you," she said, brushing the hair away from around his left ear.

"What are you thanking me for?"

"For wanting to be with me, after all we've been through; for looking after me when I needed it the most and for loving me. We couldn't have shared anything as perfect as that if you didn't love me."

"Well then, thank you, for all of those things you've just said and more besides, I do love you Claire, I'm sure I always will."

Claire smiled, tears prickling her eyes at John's heartfelt words. "I love you too," she replied. She watched him as he smiled back, stroking back her hair with his left hand and holding her close to him with the other. They fell asleep encircled within each other's arms, John only once breaking the circle to pull the bed cover over their naked forms. They slept soundly only waking when the sun filtered into their room through the open curtains. More love making ensued until they were only hungry for food, eating quickly in order to pleasure each other again afterward.

Claire awoke with a start as the telephone began to ring disturbing her reverie; although it was unwelcome it had come at a poignant time considering she was now sitting in a cold bath. She got out knowing she would never reach the phone in time, got ready for bed and walked back into her bedroom thinking about how wonderful it would be to step back in time nearly 20 years and find John in her bed again. But it wasn't to be, same place different time.

After getting into bed she reached into the drawer of her nightstand and found her precious diary from years back. Upon opening up the back cover a photograph fell out onto her lap, she picked it up, turned it over and stared at the man smiling back at her. She moved her fingers over his hair, "why did I ever let you go, I should never have let you talk me into going away, we were meant to be together forever, John. I love you, I always will." She turned on her side sliding into her bed and placed the picture on top of the nightstand. She kissed her fingers and pressed them against his face, tears beginning to trickle down her own, "I still love you so very much you see." Leaning up to switch off the lamp she stated to no one in particular "I'll see you in my dreams, my love," before turning over and closing her eyes.