In The Eyes of The Beholder
By Starian Princess
Beautiful people belonged together after all.
I. On Apathy
Despite the chaos and the many battles that surround him, Yumichika Ayasegawa finds that he simply could care less. He watches from the confines of his seemingly contented little world as shinigami of all rankings scurry about. They try to locate others, incessantly try to persuade said others to join the search for the notorious ryoka, and still, unsurprisingly, everything remains unorganized (to which he chuckles). The men are still running around in a frenzy, there are still explosions here and there, and there is still maddening disorder—something he detests, something he would rather not have much to do with in fact.
He sighs softly, playing with one of the feathers above his eyelash. There is nothing worth seeing as he blocks the scrapes and bruises and gashes from his vision, there is nothing worth listening to as he shoves the screams and cries and pleas away. There is nothing to be concerned about as long as he is alright, as long as Ikkaku is alright, and as long as Zaraki-taichou is alright. Everything is just… fine.
"So Maki-Maki was helping this ryoka? I thought for sure the strange reiatsu belonged to Ichi," he turns his head, hearing his vice-captain pondering to herself and meets the female drifter's anxious gaze. And in all his life, he has never met anyone so magnificent. Her virtuous stance makes his insides clench, her figure alone throws any man's fantasies out the window (he is no exception), her hair, her hands, her lips… Yumichika frowns for he is overcome with something akin to jealousy for the first time.
"Is that brat, Ichigo, still alive?" Ikkaku, on his left, is not at all fazed though. He believes that his friend stays oblivious to any sort of beauty and this is comforting, somewhat. Still, he cannot help but bite his bottom lip in frustration.
He is afraid that if he blinks, such an image will disappear like it was never there to begin with.
"Actually, I… I don't know," her answer is left hanging, worry evident in her tone and he wonders then why such an ethereal creature would allow the possibility of danger and defeat to mar her perfection. It is confusing, because she is not at all like him (what with her insensible carelessness) yet admittedly similar (with that unearthly elegance) just the same.
He doesn't understand the way she affects him, making him feel insecure about himself and about what he believes in. He looks to her with distrust and apprehension, hoping a flaw will emerge from the visage she puts up, or at least from what he deems is a mask of blind courage. Yumichika knows she is actually shaking inside with fear; fear for her friends, and for herself.
It surprises him though, that because of such deep contemplating he has now been made aware of the pandemonium happening outside his world. Because of his jealously, he sees his fellow shinigami screaming for help. Because of his frustration, he feels the pain and the hunger and the quest for more strength. Because of his confusion, he understands that his life is not complete and that it certainly is not just fine and dandy.
Yumichika hates the female ryoka for stirring so much emotion within him that he hates himself just as much. He believes that for hating such a stunning creature the only penance is to question himself. He questions whether there is more to the wall he has built around himself, to hide from all the impurity and ugliness. He questions whether this wall can be broken down. And he questions whether it was the innocent human girl who shattered it to pieces for him.
II. On Pain
It has been a week since he last saw the drifters. They had returned to where they had come from, back to the world below as he saw it. And for some strange reason, Yumichika has begun to feel empty like a hollow shell inside. He knows that he isn't supposed to care and that he isn't supposed to long, but he does and he does so with a passion—a passion he fights against with all the willpower left in him.
It is true though; the Eleventh Division is now much too quiet for comfort. While his captain's trainings are still an episode to look forward to and perhaps to even delight about, these do nothing for the void he has managed to acquire. There is nothing to amuse himself with, no one to watch Ikkaku spar with, and no one to challenge himself about.
The female ryoka, Orihime Inoue, had thanked them for being gracious and he had merely smiled in turn. There was, after all, nothing else to be done. In one corner of his mind, he had wanted nothing more to do with the girl yet in the other darker corner, he was still curious. He had found himself wondering about her; how she hid such wisdom in those ironically readable eyes of hers, how she bedazzled anyone who came close, how she could smile as if they had been friends for the longest time, and how she could leave (just like that) as if she didn't know how much it bothered him.
Orihime's beauty was indeed different from anyone else's. She was voluptuous like Rangiku but more naive than a child. She was intelligent though, he'd heard, easy to talk to and a light that brightened dreary days. She had been welcomed at the Fourth Division, her healing powers unlike any he'd ever seen. But she was human, flawed, and alive—very much alive.
Yumichika curses beneath his breath, the look on her face forever painted in his line of sight. Frailty like hers isn't supposed to look alluring, not at all. But it does. And it tears at his soul to know that someone has the ability to keep him so preoccupied like this.
Ikkaku, on the other hand, has taken notice of Yumichika's troubles time and time again, but the man never questions his friend about it; he only smiles and whistles off as if he has a secret that Yumichika doesn't know about.
It is another two days later when Yumichika overhears his best friend and Renji Abarai discussing matters in the hallway. Their tones are solemn; a mission, no doubt, is being passed from one to the other. And from the looks of it, Ikkaku has agreed to lend a hand.
"I have no problem with that. I'll get ready to leave right away," his friend turns to him then and a devious sort of grin teases the man's lips. He tells Yumichika that the world below is in trouble, that Aizen Sousuke has started to make his move, that arrancar have been spotted wreaking havoc, and that their human friends need their help.
For a split second, a connection of some sort passes between the long-time companions. And within that connection is a challenge. Though Yumichika does not understand what sort of challenge this is, he knows that Ikkaku is testing him. He knows that Ikkaku has a plan but he doesn't know what the said plan is about. He knows that Ikkaku will trust him to make a decision, but he is unsure of what to do himself.
And then it happens, like a faint breeze whispering in the night.
"Orihime-chan might need you."
Yumichika doubts his own sanity as the words lick against his ear. He doesn't know whether Ikkaku and Renji have heard the same plea, or whether it was one of the two who voiced it out to begin with. He doesn't even know whether he has conjured up the thought himself. What he does know, however, is that a decision has been made.
"I'm definitely going, too!" And like so, his fate has been sealed.
III. On Faith
The walls of Ichigo Kurosaki's room are much too narrow, the room itself very much too small. And he knows then that only one of them will get to stay here. No questions asked. With a knowing smile, he looks to Rukia Kuchiki and hops off his perch, following Ikkaku down the street.
This world is just like the Soul Society, with its endless sky and daring view, but there is evidently more to see and more to learn about. He studies the structures that line the sidewalks as a teasing trail of wind plays with his hair, the gentle pull like a woman's hands and Yumichika cannot help but imagine the hands belonging to one Orihime Inoue.
"She lives just around the corner, y'know," Ikkaku's lips quirk into a small smirk and Yumichika is left to wonder what on earth his friend is thinking. Rangiku and Hitsugaya-taichou had been headed to her house only seconds ago and as he had earlier thought, it would only impose too much on the girl to have too many people stay over.
Yumichika worries though despite himself, for he had heard of her injury prior to their updating Ichigo about the current situation. As noted by their system, the ex-ryoka had broken her arm and was now forced to carry it with the aid of a sling. He almost curses beneath his breath. If they had come sooner, he tells himself, perhaps the incident wouldn't have occurred.
"We can visit her after we find a place to sleep," he turns back to Ikkaku, eyes wide, and finds that his friend has propped both arms against his head, the wooden sword dangling at his hip. And then he smiles in understanding, moving his gaze to the sky again. The thought of being able to see her, to feel her smile directed at him and to have her welcome him, comforts Yumichika even if he can't quite understand why.
He now believes that he must protect the innocent human girl because she is a princess and he has, for lack of better explanation at the moment, become her self-proclaimed prince. He also now believes that no one else is worthy of her admiration and knows, through his own philosophy, that only beautiful people like her stand a chance of surviving within what he deems is an imperfect world—filled with the ugliness and impurity he once tried to hide from. He perseveres to believe though, that Orihime will be able to handle whatever evil comes her way.
Though Yumichika later realizes that he won't be able to see her again anytime soon for she has been abducted by the arrancar and has been taken to Hueco Mundo where Aizen resides, he still finds the strength to believe that because she is such a beautiful person she will be alright. And it is not because of naivety that he believes this. It is because he knows that someone as magnificent as she will find a way to beat the odds, just like the way she'd done so in the Soul Society and just like the way she'd done so with him.
Yumichika now understands more than ever what a beautiful person Orihime Inoue truly is. She is gentle yet brave, innocent yet clever, and she is more than anything he will ever be able to become. However, Yumichika still considers himself quite the beautiful person as well. And he, furthermore, persists to believe that beautiful people belong together—had always belonged together and had to stick together. This is why he knows that Orihime will come back soon and he will, in turn, await her arrival with ready arms.
-OWARI-