Title: Best-Laid Plans
Rating: PG
Length: 1.5k
Pairing(s): Carlos Garcia/Logan Mitchell, Kendall Knight/James Diamond
Summary: Logan shakes his head. "I think we should definitely not get James in on a plan that you've creatively titled Make Kendall Happy by Curing His Loneliness; the James Diamond Make-Out Itinerary. Good word, by the way."
A/N: So, this is my first BTR fic, and it's probably a lot sillier than it would be if I were writing RPS instead of show!verse fic, but I hope you enjoy it regardless! If you'd like to read it on my LJ, I'm at notbrothered on there!
...
If there's one thing Carlos prides himself on, besides his beautiful helmet, it's that he knows his best friends extremely well. He can tell when James has lost his lucky comb (of course, this may be because James will start screaming about the fact that he's lost his lucky comb), he can tell when Logan's worrying too much over an exam, and he can definitely tell when Kendall is feeling gloomy—which is now.
It's not the all-encompassing, shoulders slumped, face-planting into the nearest horizontal surface with a moan of sadness kind of gloomy, but it's there, subtle and quiet in every bite of cereal Kendall takes, and Carlos sees it.
"Hey," he says, leaning over to whisper in Logan's ear. Logan looks up from where he's working on his homework, jerking back a little at Carlos' close proximity. The tiny crease that forms in between his eyebrows says he's annoyed at being interrupted, but Carlos forges onward despite his first instinct being to move to the other, safer side of the room; their friend's happiness is at stake here. "Does Kendall look sad to you?"
Logan takes barely a second to glance at Kendall before he replies sarcastically, "He's totally oozing depression all over his breakfast."
"I knew it," Carlos says, snapping his fingers in triumph. Then he feels a little bad for celebrating Kendall's despair, so he sends mental friendship waves of apology in Kendall's direction and hopes for the best.
It seems to work, because Kendall glances up at him, finishes chewing, and then says, "Dude, what are you looking at? Do I have something on my face?"
Just the shadow of a thousand tears, Carlos thinks to himself dramatically, but what he says is: "No, you're good."
"Then stop staring," Kendall grumps, turning back to his food.
Carlos shrugs and looks back at Logan, who is watching Kendall thoughtfully. A few seconds later, he's pulling Carlos close and muttering into his ear, "You might be right."
If Carlos feels a tiny thrill at the words, it's because Logan's a genius and approval from him is high praise indeed, and totally not because of the way his warm breath huffs over Carlos' neck.
...
Carlos bites his lip, glancing between the poster board covered in diagrams and Logan where he's seated on the couch. "I think we should get James in on this."
Logan shakes his head. "I think we should definitely not get James in on a plan that you've creatively titledMake Kendall Happy by Curing His Loneliness; the James Diamond Make-Out Itinerary. Good word, by the way."
Grinning smugly at the compliment and completely ignoring the rest of what Logan said, Carlos barrels onward, clapping his hands once. "So here's what we do first—we get James in on this."
Logan sighs heavily.
...
"James, you're looking especially handsome today," Carlos greets, smiling his most convincing smile. Logan rolls his eyes next to him.
"What do you want?" James asks flatly, unmoved.
"I need you to woo Kendall."
James looks surprisingly unsurprised. "What do I get?"
"You get to make out with Kendall."
"Deal."
...
"This is more difficult than I thought it would be," James says that evening, slumping onto the couch in between Carlos and Logan. The first part of their plan—simply titled Speedo—hadn't done much except to get them a few strange looks from the other Palm Woods residents. "Why is he playing so hard to get?"
"Because he likes girls?" Logan suggests.
"But James is pretty like a girl!" Carlos says excitedly, not at all discouraged. The glare James shoots him makes him feel properly chastised. "Prettier than a girl, I mean."
Logan scoffs, but James grins blindingly at Carlos and pulls him in for a one-armed hug, patting him on the helmet. "Thanks, buddy. It ain't easy being beautiful."
"Oh, I bet," Carlos says, nodding emphatically, and a second later Logan is saying he's "gonna go see Camille about a thing," and storming out of the apartment.
...
Part two of the plan will be pretty simple for James—it involves swagger with a little bit of manipulation thrown into the mix. Carlos originally suggested calling this stage "S&M," but Logan vetoed that pretty quickly, quirking an affectionate smile at Carlos' confusion.
"Yo, Kendall," James says the next morning, leaning against the kitchen counter just right so that his shirt rides up a little on his hip. "Ken Doll."
Kendall looks up from the book he's holding, eyes wide and rightfully horrified. "Don't ever call me that again."
James falters, looking desperately at where Carlos and Logan are watching from behind the couch, not at all stealthily. Carlos simply waves his arms at James, frantically mouthing, "Go on!"
Clearing his throat and trying to regain his conversational footing, James opts for the thing that always gets 'em—the suggestive tone. He pitches his voice low and coos, "It's just that there's something in my room I need your help with." He walks two fingers across the counter, over Kendall's book, and finally up Kendall's arm and onto his shoulder. Then he boops Kendall's nose.
The whole process takes about ten seconds, and leaves Kendall looking bewildered as he says, "I'm reading. Just get Carlos to do whatever it is."
James hears Logan let out an indignant squawk and calls this part of the plan a bust.
...
The third part of the plan is a secret one, meaning neither of them tells James about it. Logan comes up with it in the middle of the night, rousing Carlos out of his sleep when he turns on the light. "What is the one thing James loves almost as much as he loves himself?"
It takes Carlos a second, but when Logan smirks and holds up what's in his hand, he leans in close enough to kiss, grabbing Logan's face in between both of his hands, and whispers gravely, "You are the smartest friend I'll ever have."
Then he grabs James' comb and hops off of his bed to hide it, leaving Logan gaping after him.
...
Carlos and Logan are playing video games when James finally notices it's missing. His "where is it?" would turn lesser men into a cowering mess, but they only share a grin. Then Logan kills Carlos.
"I wasn't paying attention!" Carlos complains.
Logan pats him on the cheek sympathetically, and resolutely does not read into it at all when Carlos leans into his hand. "You snooze, you lose."
...
It takes about two hours for James to speed-search every corner of the hotel he can get to, and then he's back upstairs, pointing an accusing finger at Carlos and Logan, who still haven't moved from the couch.
"I know one of you has it. I failed your stupid plan, and this is some twisted form of revenge. But what you don't realize is that I'm not actually interested in Kendall, and that I was doing it just to help you guys out, okay? Stealing my stuff is completely and totally uncalled for. Especially—" he cuts himself off, looking like he's on the verge of a nervous breakdown. "Especially my—"
Carlos stands then, looking properly guilty for the first time since Logan had come up with the third stage. "But James, you're so pretty even without the comb," he says, wheedling.
James raises a perfect eyebrow. "Tell me more."
"Yes, do tell him more, Carlos." Logan scowls, finds the next character that looks even the slightest bit like James, and shoots him in the face. Twice.
Carlos is looking warily back and forth between the two of them when Kendall bursts through the door right behind James, panting.
"James!"
"Kendall?"
He holds up a comb. "Did you lose—"
He can't finish his sentence, because James yanks him in and crushes their lips together in what Carlos personally thinks is a very passionate display. Kendall makes a soft sound of surprise and freezes up, but it takes only a few more seconds of shock before his eyes flutter closed and he sighs into the kiss.
James pulls back a second later, says worshipfully, "You found my comb," clearly reevaluating the whole "not interested" shtick, and drags Kendall into the nearest empty room.
Carlos plops himself back down next to Logan, grinning hugely. "We saved Kendall!"
"Pretty sure his life wasn't in danger," Logan retorts, and Carlos' smile slips a little. "You sure you wanna be out here with me instead of joining them?"
Carlos opens his mouth, then shuts it. Then opens it again. Then he punches Logan in the shoulder.
"Ow! What the hell?"
"You're an idiot," Carlos says simply, grabbing Logan's controller and tossing it aside.
"I'm not—what are you—"
Taking Logan's face in his hands the same way he had the night before, Carlos grins and whispers, "You are the prettiest friend I'll ever have."
"I'm ruggedly handsome," Logan scoffs, though his ears turn a little pink at the tips.
"You're adorable," Carlos says with certainty, and can't believe he didn't realize it sooner.
"I'm—I'm manfully good-looking."
Carlos kisses him, and finds that he likes this newfound way of shutting Logan up very, very much.