For all of his 15-mile jogs, and all of the events he ran and swam in for charity, literally nothing had exhausted Chris Traeger more than the last 14 hours. To think it all started when he was finishing his warm up sprint inside City Hall for last night's late night jog, and saw….what he saw in the hallway. And then after Leslie Knope and Ben Wyatt stopped kissing long enough to notice him, the most unpleasant final hour of a work day in Chris's life really got under way.

But as much as he hated being angry, and hated having to suspend the finest parks director he'd ever seen for two weeks…and hated having to fire his closest friend in government, they had made it quite necessary. It was one thing for Leslie to cheat on Tom and actually say that she loved Ben, and quite another for Ben to so quickly forget about that government employee he said he wanted to date weeks ago.

Yet somehow, they both knew about the interoffice dating policy and still decided to break it with other people, knowing full well what it would do to Pawnee's reputation. For the life of him, Chris couldn't get why Leslie had worked so hard to help restore the budget, Pawnee's stability and her department, only to put it all in danger again. And to drag poor Ben into it, and put him in the position of having to fire his friend….the whole thing was enough to only make him run six miles after Leslie and Ben left, and after the other parks employees kept visiting him to complain.

But now that he'd had his early morning run back into the office the next day, Chris felt confident again that this temporary ugliness would pass. He should be done cleaning up Leslie's mess by the time she came back, and by then, she'd be ready to put her happy face back on and work even harder to clean up the rest. Maybe he'd even ask her where Ben was then, so he could hear his apology and they could patch things up too.

Once he finished making those plans in his head, Chris was all smiles once again as he started looking through today's schedule. Leslie's temporary replacement would be here soon, and once he introduced him to the others, he was sure they'd put everything from last night behind them. They might even laugh about it the next time he invited them to one of his cookouts. That would certainly balance out all the calories he would gain when Ron brought his unhealthy, but sadly delicious, burgers there.

"Hello, Chris."

Chris looked up to see the owner of that distinctive voice, Ron Swanson himself.

For a moment, he thought about how he was the only one from the parks department not to visit him last night, or to object to what he had to do. But this was one time when Chris was glad that Ron was too grouchy to care about things- and since enough time had gone by, he could welcome him in like it was any other normal day.

"Ron Swanson! What brings you here so early on this fine morning?" Briefly, it occurred to Chris that Ron had never been by here this early before- or ever before, for that matter. But this wasn't the time for any suspicious, oogie thoughts like that now.

"I just wanted to assure you that I have no plans to give you a headache over yesterday's….personnel changes. I know the others gave you a hard time, but I for one, commend you on taking decisive action, and will leave you alone accordingly. Leslie did most of my job when she was here, and I have no doubt her replacement will do my job just as capably."

If anyone else had admitted to that kind of job performance, it might have made Chris raise an eyebrow. But that management style was what made Ron Ron- and at least ensured that he wouldn't compromise any government integrity. In any case, he was the first one to show him any support and understanding over this, so that bought him a much deserved pat on the back right there.

"Very good, Ron Swanson! You truly are the best director of the best parks department in all of Indiana!" Now that he was suitably relieved, Chris figured he could risk bringing up a troubling subject, since he knew he had support now. "Be sure to tell the others how sorry I am, and that I hope we'll all be friends again before work's over, okay?"

If Chris had studied Ron a little more closely- despite having come close to pat his back seconds earlier- he might have seen a tiny look of determination cross his constantly furrowed brow.

"I would if they were talking to me….or doing anything else, for that matter."

"Ah….I suppose all that yelling from last night, and all that they probably heard from Leslie and Ben, kept them up quite a bit last night. Well, you can go ahead and get them some nice cups of healthy coffee to perk them up, on me!"

"They seem to be awake just fine…in spite of sitting at their desks and doing absolutely nothing. But since they plan on doing nothing the entire day, that'll probably change before long."

At that, Chris felt that increasingly familiar lack of a smile on his face, as Ron went on.

"It's actually quite upsetting, since I thought they'd finally learned the glorious libertarian ways by not doing government work. In fact, there were many other people throughout the building who weren't working either, so that nearly gave me a half-semi. But unfortunately, it just turns out that my employees, and a few dozen other people who've worked with Leslie and Ben at one time or another, are refusing to work until Leslie's reinstated, and Ben's re-hired. Quite a letdown, really."

None of Chris's breathing techniques were coming to his mind right now, although he really could have used them right about now. But once he remembered to breathe, and was about to remember how to speak, Ron kept going.

"And if that wasn't enough, since everyone was doing nothing, I had to call and update the brass from Indianapolis myself! It made me almost as angry as they were by the time I finished. I even thought to myself how you made that dating policy to stop any scandals, but it wound up creating something much, much worse. I might have even said it out loud while I was on the phone, but I can't really remember right now."

Those were literally the worst combination of words that Chris had heard in a run-on sentence in some time. Yet Ron still seemed like he was trying to top it.

"But I calmed down after I hung up….since no one was making any noise outside my office, it was a lot easier. I don't know why it bothered me, since I don't care about any of it." Chris somehow had the strength to notice that Ron was staring right into his eyes as he made his next statement.

"Still, it's easy for me not to care about strikes, protests, outraged bosses, and people from other Pawnee institutions who aren't working either. But it's no sweat off my back to forget about destroying two people, just for finding happiness for once in their incredibly screwed-up lives."

Even at this dire time, Chris started to notice how….subtle Ron's words had become.

"Sadly, I know that isn't a luxury for everyone." Then for some strange reason- although strangeness was becoming the new normal in this office- Ron actually chuckled. "Sometimes I almost pity those pathetic people."

Chris was now starting to put some coherent thoughts together- a few of which were starting to reflect badly on Ron- before his phone started to ring.

"Well, I have a long and quiet day ahead, so I'll get to that now," Ron concluded over the ringing. "Good day, Christopher."

Once Ron walked out, Chris suddenly found himself with another unfamiliar desire- to walk extremely slowly towards his phone.

After Ron heard Chris pick up the phone, and begin the long process of getting chewed out, he finally made his way down the hall. If those who weren't working today had used their new free time to look at him – and if those who didn't work, and didn't know Leslie or Ben had bothered to notice Ron – they might have seen an incredibly small smile behind his mustache. But perhaps they also might have noticed that it was taking more effort than Ron had ever used inside City Hall to keep it from getting wider.

He almost let it get bigger when he realized that once Leslie returned tomorrow, he could probably get her to forget about 50 of the 100 favors he still owed her. In fact, considering all of those phone calls, all of that contact with the others outside of work, and all of those ungodly talks with citizens, this probably earned him at least 75 canceled favors.

In fact, assuming that he could catch Ben away from Leslie's office tomorrow, he could start a tab on favors that he owed Ron as well.

Assuming that catching him out of her office would be possible now.