Note: PLEASE DO NOT FLAME MY WORK!
Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon or the Three Lights - Search For Your Love song!
Special note: Beta-corrected by Yume-no-Ryuusei. Link in my profile!
Enjoy the story!
"Kimi wa itsumo kagayi te ta,
Egao hitotsu chiisana hoshi,
Taisetsu ni shite ta yo (eien no Starlight)...
She smiled sadly as the song played from her iPod. She only listened to the Three Lights' songs, so there wasn't a need or desire for her to listen to anything else.
Some would call that a form of depressed obsession.
"Ano hiboku wa mamore nakute,
Kuyashi namida kora e ta dake,
Itami ga nokoru yo (wasurenai sweetheart)...
The Three Lights were still the most popular band in Japan, and their songs were always on the top hits list. The song she was listening too, in fact, was the number one. It was harder to find their music nowadays, but for those who managed to find their CDs, they found it expensive. People still talk about them on the radio, often wondering how they disappeared without their fans or the paparazzi knowing, and wanting to know where they are now.
"Search for your love, sora no suishou,
Search for your love, nakanai de kure,
Search for your love, hontou wa,
Dakishimetai no sa...
She felt tears build up in her eyes, slowly blurring her vision. She has a different life now, not at all like the one she had... all because of one, life-changing decision.
"Kimi no kaori zutto (sagashiteru),
Boku no koe yo todoke (aishiteru),
Ima doko ni iru no (Moonlight Princess)...
She closed her eyes. She knew that her friends-could she even call them that?-were searching for her, as they have been for the past two years. They were, understandably, worried for her and possibly angry; she hadn't contacted with the women since she left them, and though she missed them, she wouldn't go back to that life.
"Boku no purinsesu (princess),
Kotaete answer for me,
Ima sugu answer for me,
Kotaete answer for me,
Yasashiku answer for me...
She knew her friends wanted her to come back to them; who wouldn't? After all, their predestined future-with her as Queen of Crystal Tokyo, Mamoru's supposed soon-to-be bride, and mother of her future child, Chibiusa-was on the line. However, she realized a future as great as being in charge of Crystal Tokyo could not be ruled by a sovereign who did not desire the position.
To avoid her friends, she had to get a job, move out of her mom's home, into her own apartment, and use her Lunar disguise magic to hide her appearance. She had to avoid her most obvious and favorite hangouts, as well. She attended Tokyo University and studied majority of her free time, so she could become a writer. True, she had never had any dreams of any sort of profession before-she always wanted to be Mamoru's wife-but she knew for a fact that it was never too late for anyone to develop dreams; she was no exception.
She admitted, deep down, she disliked being so alone, disliked leaving her friends behind, but she felt she had no choice, to have this life.
"Tooi yozora kakenuketeku,
Nagareboshi ni negau yo ima,
Aitai to sasayaku (tsutaete yo Starlight),
Toki ga sugite otona ni naru,
Boku wa yatto kizuita no sa,
Tarinai kakera ni (soba ni ite Sweet heart)...
She could not help the few silent, warm tears that fell as she listened to those lyrics. They reminded her of her newest friends and how they made her realize she would never try to live a normal life again, for she knew she couldn't know them as they were without the life she lived as both a senshi and a regular girl.
She wished so badly for them to sing those words to her. To have their eyes on her and have them reflect genuine love and affection to her.
She withheld a bitter laugh. They would never sing those words to her; she knew they did not feel that way toward her.
The last time she had seen them was two years ago. They had often acted impertinent, conceited and down right rude. They were very conscious of their social status and loved to flaunt it... even though they pretended to hate it.
"Search for your love, gin no unabara,
Search for your love, fune wa tadayou,
Search for your love, kuruoshisa ni,
Nagasarete yuku...
When she had first met the Starlights, she had been oblivious to whom they really were; idols or no. But Seiya soon became a good friend to her. True to her nature, though, she very quickly wanted to be friends with all of them.
But then... their identities as sailor senshi were revealed on the plane... and everything went downhill from there.
She had been heartbroken when Star Healer warned her to stay away from Seiya and blamed her for his injury, when he protected her. But in the end, she could not stay away.
During the battle with Chaos, Healer and Maker admitted to being her friends with the kindest, gentlest smiles she had ever seen.
"Kimi no kaori zutto (sagashiteru),
Boku no koe yo todoke (aishiteru),
Ima doko ni iru no (Moonlight Princess),
Boku no purinsesu...
She was surprised with her state of being, after they had left, for she had been left with confusing emotions that conflicted with how she felt already and her way of thinking. She had a lot of time to think it over, as well; two years was long enough for her. When she could not get a particular Starlight off her mind, she had chosen that it was not a passing fancy or a childish crush; it was love. It was the sort of love that made no sense, despite all of the popular phrases that explained what it felt like. It was everything and nothing at the same time; the kind where even the slightest hint of that special person could set off a whirlwind of thoughts and feelings through one's body, but no one other than the person feeling it had anything to do with it.
She looked to the sky, bathing in the bright, tranquil moonlight that normally, during any other time, would give her a sense of peace. She watched the stars glitter and shine, as if excited by the attention she was giving them.
"Kotaete answer for me,
Ima sugu answer for me,
Kotaete answer for me,
Yasashiku answer for me..."
The song slowly came to a stop and she turned off her iPod, just before the next song could begin.
'Stop thinking about them, Usagi,' She scolded herself. 'And no more tears!'She wiped her cheeks clean of the tears, drying them so she didn't feel the extra chill on her face from the wetness.
Usagi stood up and put her hands over her heart, staring up into the sky.
'I can't stop dreaming about him. Even though we never really got to know one another... I know, the one smile he gave me, is enough for me to love him.'
Suddenly, a shooting star passed over her head. Quickly, she closed her eyes and made her wish...
'I know I might never see the Starlights again, but if it were possible that I could, I wish I could see them all, one last time.'
The shooting star disappeared into the darkness of the night without replying to her wish-not that she expected a response, of course.
Reality seemed to sink into her then as she felt a gentle, chilly breeze glide over her body, making her hair billow slightly behind her. Here she was, wishing for the impossible, late in the night in Juuban Park, and knowing she has a science exam to study for tomorrow.
She ran a hand through her bangs. 'What are you doing, Usagi? Wishing on a shooting star won't make it come true.' She closed her eyes, trying to calm her mind...
"I finally found you." A distinctly male voice sounded behind her.
Usagi froze-am I dreaming?-before slowly turning around. Her eyes bulged, as a soft gasp emitted from her throat.
Before her stood a man, about 5'8-5'10, in a pale blue (almost white) tuxedo with a light pink carnation over his left breast, a deep red tie and a dark grey-blue shirt under the tuxedo jacket. He had his long, silver hair tied back in a ponytail that reached to his ankles, and bright jade green eyes that sparkled with too many emotions for her to count.
"Yaten Kou..." She whispered so low she barely heard herself. She stood frozen, not wanting to touch him and find out he was just a figment of her imagination.
"I finally found you," Yaten repeated, slowly walking toward her. His voice had a harsh note in it that made her wince.
"Your star seed... I felt its pain. I felt it pulse with agony every single moment for the past week. We came back today, finally, to see you." He stopped three feet in front of her. A scowl appeared on his face.
"But the girls say they haven't spoken to you in two years. They haven't seen you at all, in fact; all they have to know that you are still alive is the-the disguise magic or whatever you have and cannot hide! What is wrong with you, Usagi? Don't you care about your friends?"
She snapped. "Of course I care!" Usagi screamed at him. She couldn't help it. Two years of withheld feelings of loneliness, sadness, and frustration poured from her heart.
Startled by the tone of her voice, the silver-haired man stepped back. She had never raised her voice at him or any of her friends before.
"I haven't hung out with the girls in two years! I haven't seen Michiru-san, Haruka-san, Setsuna-san or Hotaru-chan since the battle with Galaxia!" Tears gathered in her eyes. "I haven't been to The Crown or the temple in so long..."
Her voice grew quiet. "I have to study so hard nowadays... I have to attend classes and go to my job and pay utility bills..." Her voice trailed off.
Silence forced its way into the night air. Usagi looked down, avoiding those fierce jade eyes. The held disappointment, anger and annoyance. She didn't want those eyes directed at her. She didn't want him to scorn her for what she felt she had to do.
'Well, this is what wishing on shooting stars does for you.'
Oh, she learned her lesson this time. She would never wish on a shooting star again.
The man stalked toward her and grabbed her wrists, yanking her forward. Usagi, clearly startled by this sudden action, stumbled in front of him, a few mere inches from being pressed against him. She looked up at him with wide, shocked eyes.
"Why did you have to leave them in the first place, Usagi? What have they ever done to you?" His eyes glared with piercing anger that the moon princess swore was aimed straight into the very fibers of her soul. "Why have you abandoned them?"
"I never abandoned them!" Tears cascaded freely down her face. "Is it so wrong to want to have my own happiness? Am I not allowed to love who I want to?"
Her eyes bore into his own. "The others... The others want me to love Mamoru, but I don't. They want me to be with him, to become Queen of Crystal Tokyo in the Thirtieth century.." She tried to pull her hands free, but his grip held strong. "But I can't! I don't love him! I love someone else!"
"Who do you love, then?"
Usagi paused. Her tears slowed, but didn't stop falling. She looked down.
Her lips moved but she didn't hear her own voice, too overwhelmed with her own feelings being in question and the shock of Yaten's sudden appearance.
"W-What?" Shock filled his voice and etched his face, and the sudden sound from unexpected silence jolted her to reality for the second time that night.
She broke free from his grasp, turned, and fled from his sight.