Woo! New Fanfiction. Maybe a one-two shot, it all depends on the reviews/favourites and all that. I got this idea off the book, 'Willow' by Julia Hoban ( I think? ) But yes, please enjoy and send me some love at the end :) Thank you so much to my awesome beta-reader. MunroCArmy (twitter), I really appreciate your help :)
OO
Chapter 1.
OO

Hi, I'm Clare Edwards. Some of you may know me by the 'cutter' or the 'girl who killed her parents'. I want to tell you about myself. This is my story, about what actually happened that night. Listen well, I hope while reading this, you will realize how much hurt you gave me. So much I wanted to end my fucking life. I hope you're happy.

I sighed as I leaned over the counter, wishing for my shift at the Dot to end soon. I hated working here; I just see even more of those stuck up bitches every day. They make me feel even more worthless than I already do. They come in here and treat me like shit. It's like I'm a fucking puppy or something.

Why can't they just understand?

I pulled out my iPod and started blasting music. My boss was eyeing me oddly as I lay my head on the counter, closing my eyes gently, letting the music drown out the rest of the world. I heard the bell go off as someone opened the door. Someone sat down in front of me and I looked up with an annoyed expression.

When I saw him, it was like my heart stopped. He had deep green eyes, jet black long hair that swayed over her eyes. His face was a perfect shape, and his lips were perfect as well.

What the fuck, Clare? No... Snap out of it.

He smirked, "May I have a milkshake and some fries please?" He smiled at me and handed me some money. I nodded my head and slowly and got his food. Just as I handed him his things, the three people that I really didn't want to see came in.

"Hey freak, get me a hamburger with a soda."

I shot him, or Dave, a death glare and gave him his food, nearly throwing it at him. "Here you go, bitch." He threw my money down on the table, making it fall. I mumbled things under my breath as that dark haired kid got down and helped me out.

"I... I got it!" I yelled grabbing the money from him and shoving it in the register. He sat back down and finished his meal as the giggling and murmuring continued at the table in the far corner.

I glared at them, and Julia stood up, walking towards me with a milkshake in her hands. She raised her eyebrow deviously as she eyed the boy sitting at the counter. She walked up to me and before I knew it, I was covered in the sticky substance of the milkshake, the liquid pouring down my suddenly flushed cheeks and now damp curls.

Great... just fucking great.

Julia laughed obnoxiously and walked back over to the table with her group of friends. I looked at my boss who was talking to them, asking them to leave. I smirked as they all shot me a glare as they left. I looked back down at my clothes which was now ruined and stained from the drink.

"Fuck!" I yelled as I ran into the bathroom. The guy at the counter tried to say something but I wouldn't turn back around. I needed to clean up, and I finally felt the urge to cut. I needed to. I need to let my anger out.

As I finally finished cleaning up, I locked myself into the stall; the last door on the right. I sat down against the wall and dug through my pocket. I didn't feel anything, but I kept trying. After a few moments of frustration, I finally felt the tiny blade. I touched the top. Perfect. It's a fresh blade. I took it out of my pocket and eyed it carefully before pressing it down on my wrist, wincing at the slight pain that came upon me.

I didn't care, though; I like the pain.

Blood trickled down my arm as I watched it drip down onto the ground. I smiled to myself and got the white towel I always used and pressed it gently onto my wrist, feeling the rough material rub against my freshly made cut. I added more pressure onto the cut as the blood started coming through the top. I let the towel fall, noticing that the cut has finally stopped bleeding.

Hesitantly, I walked out of the stall and cleaned up the small mess that I left in the bathroom. I cleaned my arm carefully and pulled on a jacket to cover up the noticeable mark.

People already notice though, so why hide it?

I walked out of the bathroom, to see no one in sight but the staff cleaning around the area.

"Clare you can leave, go home and clean up." My boss smiled at me and handed me my paycheck. I nodded my head and walked out of the coffee shop and stopped right in my place when a hard body stopped me.

I fell to the ground, only to be picked back up. I looked at the person; it was the same guy who was being strangely nice to me earlier.

No one is ever nice to me. They know too much stuff.

"Are you okay?" He asked. His voice was soft, filled with worry.

"I... um. I'm fine. Why are you talking to me?" I spat. I looked everywhere but at him, trying to avoid his gaze.

"I... I don't know. You just seem like you need a friend."

"I don't need anything." I whispered while walking passed him.

"My name is Eli. Eli Goldsworthy." I didn't stop, I just kept walking further and further away from him. I turned around and he was still standing there, starting at me with that stupid smirk on his face. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.

He can't know about me - the real me. He will only treat me like all the others.

OO

"Okay, everyone, today you will be assigned English partners. You will have to get together after school somehow and work with each other." Ms. Dawes' loud, cheery voice echoed throughout the classroom, making me even more annoyed with her than I already was.

"Clare Edwards and…" Ms. Dawes shot her eyes up to the back of the room when the door opened up. "Nice of you to join us, Mr. Goldsworthy, you will be working with…Clare Edwards."

No… it couldn't be.

The boy- or Eli- sat in the chair in front of me and smiled, "So partner, when do you want to meet up to do this project?" He smiled at me and looked at me, suddenly making me feel uncomfortable. I just glared at him, not giving him and answer. After a few moments he gave a loud sigh and turned in his desk to make me better.

"Okay, you're upset, is it what happened at the Dot?"

"No." I said quickly.

"Then why aren't you talking to me?" He asked again, his lips faintly tugging into that annoying smirk.

"Because, Elijah," He hissed as I said his full name, "I don't want to talk to you. I'm pissed off as it is that you're my partner, I don't need to hate you even more than I do."

"It's Eli, by the way, and I'm sorry if I did anything to hurt you. I didn't mean to. I just want to pass this year and get good grades, make my parents proud so they won't hate me."

I took a deep breath and finally got the nerve to look up at him, "Okay, Eli," I spat. "Can we just get this project done so you can stop talking to me?"

He nodded and looked at me, his expression was unreadable, but he looked upset.

Did I hurt him? Wait… why would I care?

"Can we go to my place after school? I can take you home afterwards." He said, with a small amount of hope in his voice. I rolled my eyes and nodded just as the bell rang for us to leave and go home.

I grabbed my books and held tightly onto them as I followed Eli out to his car – or hearse - . "You drive a hearse?" I asked softly, he turned around and smiled.

"Yeah, his name is Morty." He got inside his hearse and I just stood there, admiring his car.

"Hello, are you coming?" He asked while rolling down the windows. I sighed and got in, staying away from Eli as far as possible.

He pulled up in front of this old, abandoned building out in the middle of nowhere.

"Where are we?" I mumbled under my breath, he turned his head and shrugged his shoulders.

"I usually come here to study, it's a quiet place, and I thought you would be interested in something like this." He smiled and I looked over at him, his sleeve of his shirt raised up a little, and that's when I noticed a blood red cut. It looks fresh, probably made about a week or so ago.

Does he cut too? No, he can't.

He noticed I was staring and he quickly covered his arm and got out of the hearse and walked over to my side and opened the door for me. I eyed him suspiciously and walked behind him as we came upon stairs leading to the top of the roof.

"Ladies first," He said awkwardly. I just stood there and looked at him. "I'm not going to hurt you in anyway, blue eyes, just lets go get this essay done and over with." I had no idea what to say, so I slowly walked in front of him to the top of the roof.

The view on top of the building was beautiful. I could almost see the whole city of Toronto. I smiled inwardly to myself and sat down on a blanket that Eli had laid out.

"Hey, um… we're partners, and I don't even know your name, mind telling me?" He said sitting down uncomfortably close to me. I scooted over some and noticed the hurt look in his eye. There was a long pause.

"Clare." I whispered as I got out my paper and pen to start on my essay. He only nodded and I saw him smile as he started on his paper also.

Of course, as I started reading what we had to write about, I started getting overwhelmed and nervous.

Write about something that happened in your life that really impacted you. Losing a family member, a friend, anything that you think is important.

Of course, I was going to write about my parents, and how I killed them. That impacted my life because ever since the doctor told me that neither of them made it, my whole perspective on life changed. I gave up my beliefs, started turning against my religion, I don't believe any of that shit anymore. I started cutting; people at school got worse towards me.

My parents were the most important people in my life, one second they were yelling at me from the backseat, drunk, telling me what I was a mistake. Next minutes, they're dead. I slid on ice on the express way, hit another car head on, killing both my parents and the other driver, leaving me with only a broken leg and arm. I've always blamed myself for their death, people even tell me that I'm the one who killed them, that I killed three innocent people on purpose.

I'm usually not the one to write about my life and how messed up it is, but I needed to let this out. Ms. Dawes has helped me with past issues, and I actually feel like I can trust her. This may be weird, but she's actually mentioned that I could call her anytime and go to her house if I ever need anything. It was a strange offer to me at first, but the night I actually showed up at her doorstep, I figured I could actually trust her and go to her if I need any help.

As I was going into more and more detail about the crash and how fucked up my life is after that, my heart started pounding in my chest, and my hands started getting shaky.

"Clare?" Eli asked looking up at me. I blocked the sound of his voice and stood up, going through my bag to find the blade I used earlier. I took it out, not even caring if Eli saw.

"Clare? What are you doing?" I backed up and noticed that Eli was directly behind me. I turned around, my cries turning into sobs. Once he saw the blade his eyes widened and he grabbed my shoulder but I pulled away.

"Clare, don't do this." He whispered, I shook my head and began to speak.

"My parents want me to die. They even said that I was a mistake the night I killed them. Haven't you heard, Elijah? I killed my parents that night when I crashed into another car. That whole fucking accident was my fault. My parents want me dead, so that's that they're going to get." I cried and pressed the blade onto my wrist. Eli ran over to me and grabbed the blade from my hand, eyeing the cuts all up and down my arm.

"Don't do that, Clare." Eli whispered while ghosting his fingers over the scars. "Why would you hurt yourself?" I closed my eyes tightly and took a deep breath.

"Because, Eli! I'm ugly; I'm a disgusting human being. No one cares about me, that's why I hurt myself. I cut because everyone hates me for what I did. I cut because I'm worthless in this world and just a waste of space. No one cares, not even you."

He raised his eyebrow and placed his hand on my cheek, caressing it and wiping off the tears that were still falling. "I care about you."

"No you don't, you're lying!" I yelled getting out of his grip. He pulled my back and I landed right into his chest, his arms wrapping around my upper body, pulling me into a comforting hug. "No… you're lying!" I yelled, fighting him to make him let go, but his grip only became tighter around me. I finally gave in and started sobbing in his chest, my arms hanging loosely around his waist. I felt him press a light kiss on my forehead.

"It's okay, Clare. I got you."

OOO

CONTINUE OR….? :) YOU TELL ME!

I KNOW IT SEEMS LIKE THEY'RE GOING TO FAST, BUT NEXT CHAPTER SOMETHING IS GOING TO HAPPEN WITH CLARE… SO YEAH. :)