Anyone who's played or even knows about Final Fantasy VII knows that game is boat loads of awesomeness! X3 Can be a bit confusing, but still worth it. Recently I've been refreshing myself with walkthroughs and such of just about every part of the game series, and eventually led to this little idea in my mind. As much as I wanted to focus on my other story, this would not leave my head! Trust me I've tried. So I figured, "Why not write it out?" I've got nothing to lose :3
I would say this takes place sometime after the events of Advent Children and leads into Dirge of Cerberus, in the point of view of one of my own characters. I know I've done nothing but these, but until I come up with something better, this is it. This character is actually from my work outside of fanfiction, but I've manipulated her story so that it fits better with the storyline from Final Fantasy VII. Be aware, this might be a one time deal. One and done. This is my first time writing for Final Fantasy VII, so it's a little difficult to write something a little realistic. Unless I feel the need or if anyone wants me to extend on it, then I'll see if I can wrap a decent fic around it. Otherwise, it'll just stay a concept. So please leave a review containing your thoughts and comments, and I'll see if this can be turned into a pretty decent fic ^^
I don't own Final Fantasy VII or any games in relation to it.
I listen to the cries of the Planet. I am lulled to sleep and invaded with muddied dreams, clouded with the vague and somewhat familiar by Gaia's screams for mercy. Tis not but sugary sweet music to my ears as I am cradled in its frail embrace and delivered deeper into the expanding nothingness. I do not think of what could be causing such terrible chords; why the Planet was in so much pain, and who would dare to make mother Gaia cry so hard for so long, for I could do nothing but listen as her torment fluctuates from a dim soreness to long intervals of agony that leave me both petrified and then suddenly filled with some sick elation only akin to my own sadism. I do not hate mother Gaia; she is where my life was born and nurtured, and then returned to once my job upon her rich soil was done. It was what was making her scream that brought my sudden bouts of joy, thoughts of fresh slaughter and blood painting the landscape a sinful shade of crimson bringing a grin to my cheeks.
These thoughts, no matter how demonic or inhumane they may be, were not caused by some shadow that holds my heart in its deadly vice grip. They were my own, dreams I wouldn't mind making a reality if not for mother Gaia coaxing me to return. I lived to feel flesh tear, to have my body spattered in the gorgeous red of my enemies and have their tortured pleads pound against my eardrums. I would lap up any wounds that found their way into my skin and continue the spree until nothing is left and the Planet's cries cease for at least a moment. Then I would relish in the brief silence that would follow suit, the wind the only lullaby that could cool the bloodlust within me until Gaia once again screeches for leniency and the thirst for violence plagues me once more.
"What ails you, mother?" I ask, the softness of my voice echoing into the darkness that surrounded me. I was not surprised to hear the bored tone coming back to me, for there were no other receivers. I was the only one subjected to this journey, condemned to float aimlessly into nothing. Mother's cries had softened much in the last couple of years, so it was unnerving to hear her wails escalating in volume. These were not cries of pain however. They did not seem to contain the usual struggle, the torment in her tone was much more of that of an old miser wishing for his youth. Wishing for one last chance, for old wounds to scar and hopefully regain the pubescent glow of their skin instead of watching it grey and turn to dust.
"Are you... worried, mother?" I pondered, my interest peaked, "Perhaps of what is to come? Surely no one would be foolish enough to try a stunt like the one two years ago again. You have only begun to heal." I was not around when said catastrophe occurred for I had already returned to mother Gaia, but she tells me many things as of late; tales of the past and present that slowly start to leak into the future. There was not much I hadn't already knew, as the story of the Cetra was passed down from generation to generation within my family. During my years away from Gaia, however, I knew nothing but suffering. How to suffer and then bring that suffering onto others. There was scarcely a safe haven in my life, and when there was the tiniest bit of salvation, it was immediately snuffed out before I even knew it was there to begin with. And then afterward, I am left with Gaia's pained wails.
Her anxious calls soon became louder and dreadful to the ears. As much as I would like to ignore it, and believe me there were times in which I was very tempted to rip my ears apart so that the cries would stop, this had me intrigued. "Tell me what has you worried, dear mother. Is it another catastrophe? Another war brewing, maybe? I can't help if you don't tell me what has you calling such sorrowful songs."
For several minutes, the Planet's cries softened to whispered groans. I lay there enjoying the quiet, a genuine smile gracing my lips before I am suddenly attacked with the most painful of visions, each more familiar than the last. My 'heart' ceases to beat, unadulterated terror seizing it and my brain is pulled this way and that in order to take in every mental image. A scream caught in my throat and was close to erupting as each picture passed through my mind, Gaia's call growing in urgency.
Behind all the flashing lights and faded memories, most of which I believed to have been buried long ago in the dank recesses of my shattered psyche, one sight stood out the most. A diamond colored a dark scarlet emblazoned in every corner, on every desk and piece of parchment in sight. Ever so slowly the image fades into darkness and a soft voice at last whispered an all too recognizable name, one that inflamed my sleeping temper.
"Shinra...," I growled, a chuckle rumbling from my chest, "A name I have not heard in a long time. Have they not yet paid for their crimes? For draining your life and those that have passed on, I only wish I were the one to deal them the finishing blow," my voice carried a hint of mirth, a dark giggle escaping my throat as the headache subsided into a subtle soreness, "There are many more secrets buried within the ruins of Shinra's empire; untold horrors that have been locked in a dungeon far beneath your earthy skin. I have not only seen, but bear the scars of such horrors, dearest mother, and therefore have a sense of what may possibly have you so troubled. Tell me, Gaia, what must I do? Tell me how I can ease your pain and soften your cries."
As the gentle words slipped easily from my lips, upon my tongue I can already taste the fresh metallic tang of spilled blood and the feel of skin and muscle wrapped around my fingers. I've gone so long in this darkness, this never-ending pit filled with empty promises that my very heart and soul had turned stir crazy. Rejuvenated memories of my time in Shinra did nothing to satisfy my craving for murder, only intensify it as I anticipated the possibility of being released from this prison. Oh, the happiness I would feel when I finally have revenge upon those who dared to cross me. To have their beating heart in my hands would be gift enough for all my suffering under Shinra's unyielding torture.
"Understand, mother Gaia," I elaborated with tender tones, a hypnotic purr caressing the space around me, "My actions are not out of selfishness..., perhaps a tad, but only to quiet your suffering and deal an appropriate punishment onto those who dare to hurt you. My heart, soul, and body is here to serve you. My entire being is at your disposal, mother. Do what you will to ensure survival and use me as your pawn; your knight sworn to serve you to the highest of one's abilities."
Several minutes passed between us as Gaia contemplated the decision. It wasn't the first time I attempted to escape the Planet, using sugary sweet words to worm my way out of this pitiful existence and then shot down when her cries were eased by means of another sort. It calmed me to know there are still decent human beings that cared much about mother Gaia's welfare, but even so it still pissed me off when my chances for refuge were terse and my pleads ignored. A maniacal grin soon appeared on my lips as the ethereal glow of the Lifestream enveloped my husk of a body in its careful arms, the brightness warm and welcoming. Blinded by its radiance, I closed my eyes and let it whisk me away to whatever destination mother has planned for me, its warmth heavenly on my skin.
"Do not worry mother," I whispered soft assurances, a bit of laughter leaking out in between words, "I shall serve you well. Follow your orders down to the very punctuation points."
"That doesn't mean I can't have a little fun while I'm at it."
Immediately I felt the soothing wetness of raindrops cascading down my face, and with a startled breath I shot abruptly into a sitting position. My hand automatically went to my beating heart as the new yet recognizable sensation of air rushing in and out of my lungs had me floored. I didn't care to check where mother Gaia had sent me or if there were any bystanders unfortunate enough to catch me in a state of vulnerability, for their lives would be reduced to nothing in an instant. Drawn only to sound, the wonderful heavenly tune of my heart pulsing underneath the flesh and muscle. A church choir singing harmonious praises to the skies couldn't compare, and after taking a moment to hum and tap to the timeless rhythm, laughter finally found its way passed my gated lips.
"I'm free...," I said happily, lifting my head to further drench myself in Gaia's waters, "I'm finally free!" A cheer had me on my feet in moments and much like a child in a yard sprinkler I danced in the puddles, enjoying the sensations it brought to my hands, feet, and skin. Sweet Gaia was silent through my little rain dance, holding back any lingering pains as to allow me to bask in my newfound freedom. After several minutes of twirling and jumping and catching drops on my tongue, I fell to the bare muddy ground breathless.
"I-I am... tired," I huffed with a chuckle, then rubbed my arms and knees, "my muscles are screaming...And my knees," skin flaked off as blood droplets rose from the cuts, "They're scraped. Damn it! It stings!" Levity was evident on my tone, but I suppressed the laugh planning to break out to further bathe myself in these old vibes. About two or three years had passed since I felt so liberated; to have pain, to have water stimulate my taste buds and to have my body begging to lie still after a brief dance in the rain was so much better than feeling nothing at all. So long as Gaia has me upon her soil, I will relish these senses of mine with gratitude.
"I wonder," I leaned over a small pool of water nearby and waited for the rain to lighten before scrutinizing the young girl staring back at me with a curious look. Large eyes of pure gold pierced passed the mirror with a sharp gaze, her skin a soft cream under the gloomy rainclouds. Her face was marred with ink trails falling from the bottom of her eyes to her jaw line, and raising a thickly trimmed brow, she scrunched up her tiny button nose when a clump of lime green hair fell across her eyes. Looking down and spreading my arms wide, I was surprised to see that I was wearing the same clothes I died in, the fabric of my navy blue sleeveless turtleneck and tight black shorts perfectly mended as though brand new. Numerous thick straps trailed and crossed my legs, slots empty of their weapons. Heavy belts intersected at the waist, each attached to a vacant gun holster. Even my black high tops, leather gloves, right shoulder guard and the metal band around my left biscep looked as if they were freshly polished.
"Looks like Gaia had to reconstruct more than I thought," I said lightly, tracing my hair from the roots to the tips that lay behind me like a train, sinking into the mud. Feeling the black ribbon around my neck, I pulled the long strands into a high ponytail to keep them out of the mud, the messy fringe falling into my eyes. "Hmph. Couldn't do anything about this baby face?" I glared at my reflection, the heat growing more intense when it shot one right back, "Then again, I was a hot mess before I kicked it."
Not wanting to drown in unwelcome thoughts, I stood and decided to scope out the scenery. There wasn't much to be seen as the land had been drained of life and was turned into a wasteland. No vegetation sprouted from the infertile ground, and in the distance I could see the distant ruins of what once was the bustling metropolis of Midgar. From where I stood, the city was reduced to nothing but a landfill, and inside I felt a need to pray for the long departed caught underneath Meteor's weight.
"Hmph, nothing but pests really," I said, disgusted at my own sympathy, "Those below the plates I may consider victims and place flowers on their graves, but that aside, anyone who just stood there and watched as Shinra drained life from dearest mother doesn't deserve sympathy. Not even worth the effort to save. They were more like targets anyway; something to shoot at when I'm bored and need to blow off steam."
On cue, the Planet's voice was carried through the calm winds and into my ears, pulling me away from my long winded rant. I closed my eyes with my head lifted to the roaming clouds above and attentively listened for my first task, waiting for the pictures to be sent into my mind. Unlike before, these were not accompanied by a wave of pain, but a serene sweet smell. The smell of flowers, a rarity in a desolate place such as this and I inwardly blanched at the scent. I never could stand the smell of flowers. My sense of smell is so acute, I could hardly stand the smell of anything, and flowers were just the worst. However, even as Gaia continued to filter unfamiliar faces and places in my mind, I remembered only one building in all of Midgar that grew flowers in abundance, and the thought of revisiting it without so much as a single welcome made the scent more nostalgic.
"Looks like we had the same idea, mother," I said, melancholy laced in my tone, "Very well. I shall find these saviors of yours within the week as requested," I bowed my head and added, "However, I would like to pay my respects to a couple of... friends... if that's alright."
Feeling a sudden warmth caress my cheeks in approval, I made my way down the deep slope and across the wasteland, my brain set to the Sector 5 slums.
The wooden church doors groaned in protest as I slipped inside and was suddenly captured by the overpowering sweet odor of flowers. As tempted as I was to plug my nose to avoid the migraine that would come soon after being exposed to the god awful smell, I kept my hands tight against my sides and stepped further into the decrepit building. I'm not one for being religious, but even so I should still show some kind of respect. Just my being here is a sin.
"Even after being gone for who knows how long, the smell of this place still makes me sick," I said bluntly, emotion barely dripping from my voice as I observed the interior of the church with mild interest. Much of it remained the same from when I last left it, perhaps a little more dusty with the passing years. The pristine white walls and marble columns were layered in dirt and dust, and the light fixtures appear rusted from their perch on the ceiling. Barely any light shown from the window overhead due to the swollen clouds outside, and church pews were littered haphazardly around the room. Though the ground was happily growing grass and flowers without a care, up ahead I rose an inquisitive brow at the newly made pool of water just below the alter.
"Yours and that girl's doing, I assume," I crouched over the edge and dipped my fingers into the lukewarm water, spite leaking from my throat, "The cure for the Geostigma. Hmph, even in death she still finds a way to trump me. She's done so much good, where I had done nothing but cause misery," I stood slowly and my eyes locked on what was stabbed ceremoniously into the alter, a saddened smile curling the ends of my lips, "It's no wonder you chose her, my dearest friend..., Zack."
A large heavy sword, a Buster sword, was impaled into the stone in memory of the long departed SOLDIER, and with a heavy heart I approached it, tears threatening to leave my eyes.
"There was so much I could've done for you," I knelt in front of the blade, head down in shame as pictures of his smiling face and bright blue Mako infused eyes tore away at my chest, "So much I should've told you, for if I did then maybe... maybe your life could've been spared. Just sitting here, breathing and living and brought back through Gaia's influence, it's sinful. You deserve to live more than I do. It was always your dream to become a hero, not me. Heh," a dark chuckle slid through my lips, "There's only one thing I can do, and that's kill."
I crossed my legs and folded my arms in my lap to get more comfortable. "I sensed something in the wind that day. The day you disappeared to the day of your death, I sensed Gaia's voice telling me of tragedy approaching soon. But by the time I acknowledged it, you were well on your way to the Lifestream. Since then I've had this guilt building in my chest and am full of many regrets. Around that time, Shinra had tight leash on me, but even so I regret not slaughtering them when I had the chance. Then I could've stood by your side, not a hero but a 'sidekick' as you so affectionately put it. Maybe then, we could be...," a shudder caused my voice to crack with unshed tears, hesitancy clogging my throat, "W-We could've been..."
The memories came crashing afterward, and carefully I placed a hand to my heart as his image plagued my thoughts. How much I hated him and wanted to put a bullet through his thick skull the first opportunity I got; how he always seemed to be there whenever I returned from testing and then feeling my fists for broken bones after finding copy of my work schedule in his back pocket. I remember quite clearly that I wanted nothing more but to see his blood on my hands for he was nothing but a target then, but eventually that inert feeling to kill turned to playful torture as his reactions were more entertaining than physical violence. I had hoped my actions would drive him away so I could wallow in my thoughts alone, but that only seemed to draw him closer.
He just kept coming. Soon enough I began to feel a light flutter in my chest whenever I saw his childish grin and waited for hours just to hear the exhaustion in his voice after a successful mission. I gave no explanation why I was sleeping in the main lobby, why the walls were covered in random doodles (many of which weren't for the squeamish), or why I grew a fondness for children's books because by then I had only begun to learn to read. If he came back unharmed, I'd give the usual 'bored outta my ass' greeting, and if he sustained injuries, a good knock to the skull so that he would learn to be more careful. He had given me my first name around the time he reached 2nd class and was completely flabbergasted when I told him I had nothing but a code. I remember him being so put off by it, and said I needed something more delicate and pretty. Of course that earned him a couple of goose eggs, but I kept the name nonetheless, enjoying the way it sounded in his voice. I cared for him, that much I knew and was willing to admit, but I didn't realize the extend of my feelings until he began seeing her...
"My friendship with you was all I ever had besides mother, but even so my feelings were... much stronger than that," I admitted after choking back the saliva building in my mouth, "so when you started seeing her I... I grew angry. Almost enraged. It definitely explains why I've avoided you whenever you came back. You may not know it, but I trailed you whenever you came here to see her. By then I was just learning jealousy. She was prettier, softer, and always had this kindness in her voice that sickened me more than the flowers she grew here. Even had a sense of humor. Compared to me, she was an angel. Even now I'm still jealous because she is with you in death," I sighed, "So imagine my surprise when she spots me hanging from the support beams after you leave. I was so damn sure I was going to kill her right then and there, but even when I had the barrel of my gun pointed to her forehead, she offers me something to eat. She was a strange woman, that's for sure. A lot stranger when I felt Gaia's presence within her, and found out she was a Cetra," I laughed a bit, "I have a high respect for the Cetra race, so I couldn't kill her anyway. I was so pissed!"
Angry as I was, I was caught under her spell. During the four years he had gone off radar, I stuck by her hidden within the shadows of the church. Simply watching her go about her daily life and trying to ignore the sickeningly sweet smell of her flowers. I left whenever I was needed at Shinra; I couldn't say 'no' otherwise or risk desertion. And often times I ventured around Midgar and beyond, even opting to search in Wutai for the raven haired SOLDIER, but as soon as I returned, I'd find myself watching the brunette woman with an empty stare.
"During the time I spent with Aerith, I couldn't shake the feeling something bad was going to happen, and apparently she felt the same vibe," I explained with a shrug, "She was worried out of her mind, sent you letters, prayed, the whole nine yards. In my opinion, it was pathetic, but still even I have to admit it was a hell of a lot more than what I was doing. Caring wise. And I guess I realized then that there was no way I could beat her love for you. I knew you felt the same way, it was in your eyes. So decided to protect her as much as I could. Don't get me wrong, if given the opportunity, her blood would be staining the walls by now. But I saw she made you happy, and I guess it was enough for me."
I took a breath to gather my thoughts, my heart sinking into my stomach as the words seemed to flow endless from my lips. "I guess in the end I couldn't protect either one of you. You died before I could reach you, and I was deep-sixed long before I could do anything about Aerith. Makes me think how pathetic my existence has been," I lifted my head and stared into the cold steel of the buster sword with a determined sharpness, "But now, things are different. Gaia has given me this chance to redeem myself, and to make up for all the crap I've done for Shinra over the years. I won't let your kindness go in vain, Zack!" I stood and pressed my fist to my chest in a firm salute, "I don't know anything except suffering and how to put that suffering onto others. I'm a ruthless killer, a sadist who enjoys the taste of blood. I've taken more lives than I ought to have done, and I don't feel a shred of guilt. But for you... and Aerith, and mother Gaia, no innocent blood will be spilled. I may torture and tease as is my nature, but the only blood I will taste are those who stand in the way of the Planet's salvation, and my quest in doing you two the justice you rightfully deserve. I will atone for my mistakes towards you both. I will be your black knight until Gaia has my corpse turned to ash and my soul drifting into the Lifestream. Only then will I be at peace, and hopefully earn your forgiveness."
A solemn vow I planned to keep to the ones who showed me any kindness or respect. Who viewed me as a person rather than a weapon of mass destruction. As the clouds shifted, moonlight washed the church in a haunting white glow above the pool in the center, beckoning me to its welcome embrace. I turned and strolled towards the water's edge, hearing the Planet's soft voice lulling me into a soothing trance that would eventually lead into deep sleep. With soft steps I treaded lightly in the chest deep water and let my feet out from under me, letting myself relax on my back in the pool's tender embrace.
'Tomorrow I begin anew. My search for salvation and forgiveness with only Gaia's cries as my guide. My body will be used as her pawn from dawn to dusk, and I am content in knowing I shall serve without a second thought in mind. Tomorrow... my quest begins, my own journey to heroism.' I closed my eyes, the land of perpetual nightmares drawing me in.
'A savior for the long departed.'