Chapter 1
A Formal Meeting

A meeting; a place where a myriad of people gathered in order to discuss important ideas. A place where people were mature and considered their words carefully before speaking. Or... so it was supposed to be. Meetings involving the nations of the world went a little bit... differently. Needless to say, the meeting wasn't going as well as most of those present had hoped. Of course, you couldn't really expect any less when the topic of food was tread upon in the presence of one very volatile food enthusiast.

"You bastard, I'll kill you!" Romano growled as he reached over the table to strangle England. The multiple other nations present at the meeting the watched on in shock, their mouths hanging open slightly.

"Veee~ Fratello, don't! Are you forgetting who you're trying to attack?" Romano's younger brother, Veneciano, desperately clung to his leg in an attempt to pull back his sibling from his imminent demise.

"I don't fucking care!" Romano wrenched his leg away and jumped for England, "How dare he insult my tomatoes!"

England smirked at him as he side-stepped out of the way, "You twat. Tomatoes are the most disgusting vegetable I've ever had the displeasure of forcing upon my taste-buds."

"TASTE-BUDS? OH I HAVE A FEW THINGS TO SAY ABOUT YOUR TASTE-BUDS!"

As Romano made another lunge toward the grinning nation, his brother grabbed him from behind and attempted to plea to the calmer of the two to break up the growing fight, "Mister England, sir, umm, please stop making my brother angrier. It's getting hard to hold him back. Oh, and tomatoes are a fruit by the way."

England shot him a look, "Oh? So now you're going to go up against me to? Well, that's fine with me. I can take both of you idiots on!"

"Ehh? What, no, I just-"

"Not that it'll be too hard. You two can't do much without running off to get Spain or Germany to help."

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?"

With a surprising show of strength, Romano shoved his brother off and finally grabbed onto his target. Glaring murderously as the blond-haired nation's eyes widened in shock, Romano spat at him, "I don't need that bastard's help to pummel you into dust, asshole."

With that, Romano clenched his right hand into a perfect fist and swung. The loud crack of bone to cartilage rang throughout the room. Someone screamed. Romano was willing to bet that it was his brother. Abundant silence followed. England fell to the ground as Romano let go of his collar, clutching his profusely bleeding nose.

Wincing through the pain, England looked up at Romano and narrowed his eyes, "You'll regret this. I swear by my name that you'll regret this." England's eyes darted to the side where Veneciano was standing by, looking afraid. Getting quickly to his feet, he made a swipe at the defenseless nation only to be stopped by a stoic blond with steely blue eyes.

"That's enough."

England snorted at him, reeling a bit at the pain that shot through his nose as he did so, "Oh, it's "enough" after I get hurt is it? Right. Hmph, are you certain you want to get involved in this Germany?"

The German coldly stared back, refusing to offer another word.

"Fine," England smiled calmly, "It's not like I'll have to wait long for revenge anyways."

The room watched silently as England gathered his things, one hand still placed firmly on his nose, and started to walk toward the door. Opening it with a flourish and beginning to stride out, England threw them one last glance over his shoulder and smiled grimly, "Don't bother locking your doors and windows tonight. No matter what you do, there's no way to escape my vengeance. So, as you Italians say, ciao!"

His laughter echoed in the room even after the door slammed shut behind him and his footsteps had long faded into the distance. Romano wiped his hands on his shirt, purposefully avoiding the accusatory glares many countries were sending his way. Hey, that's what you got for insulting his precious tomatoes! As he glanced to the side, he noticed his brother wiping tears from his eyes, one hand firmly fisted in the front of Germany's shirt. The German awkwardly patted him on the back as he continued to sob. Romano narrowed his eyes in disgust but said nothing.

With a sullen look around the room, Germany sighed, "Well, at this point, it looks like there isn't anything else we can do today. Meeting dismissed."

And in heavy silence, the nations departed.

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YOU DON'T DISS THE TOMATOES! D:

Well, this came out much less than humorous than I intended. (And much, much shorter too!) But perhaps the beginning is better off that way? xD I assure you though, THE SERIOUSNESS IS A LIE! :D The next chapter should clear things up a bit~ ^^ And yes, I'm not using human names for this story. Although I have another story in mind where I think they'll work splendidly~! :D

Reviews make me a happy little tomato! :3

Translations

fratello – brother

ciao – so long/bye (can also mean "hello"; depends on context)