"Muhahaha! I'm gonna conquer the world! FUUUUUCK!" Hidan bursts into the living room, screaming from the top of his lungs. He swings his scythe nearly cutting down Tobi.
"Fuck YEAH! Akatsuki's a bang! Bang, bang, bang, bang YOU'RE DEAD! Muhahaha!" Deidara enters just after Hidan, shooting him with his fingers formed as a gun.
"SENPAI! Please notice me!" Tobi jumps on Deidara's back and begin hugging/strangling him.
*v*
Zetsu's standing in a corner, wringing his hands and white one blushing deeply. In front of him stands a two feet tall, greenish house plant.
"… It… it's just that I haven't had the courage to ask before, but wanna bang? NO! That was NOT what I was going to say, I- muhahaa! She wants me! I-I-I… WAIT FOR ME!" He storms off, with the words: "I replant you tonight!"
*v*
Kisame cubs Tobi's masked face with his hands and stares deep into the hole.
"I suddenly feel like playing basketball… Why do I feel like playing basketball?" He tentatively push Tobi's head toward the floor. When it does not come back, he shrugs and steps over the body.
"There's a bug on the floor…" Tobi happily notice.
*v*
Itachi jumps onto the coffee table holding a big, open banana. He hovers it above his head as a godly artifact and yells: "Praise it, oh praise the Uchihas' new-" Kisame starts drooling. "-Banana…" He falls to his knees staring at brown-spotted fruit.
Itachi looks down at bluish man. He begins to laugh manically and shoves the banana into Kisame's gaping mouth.
"Deep-throat it bitch! Muhahah! Uchiha!"
*v*
Tobi peeps over the sofa's backrest. His senpai's sitting behind it furiously starring at his hands.
"STOP! STOP IT, UN!" Deidara screams. He violently tries to force his palms from each other to end their passionate make-out-scene. "Oh, can Tobi join?" Tobi asks with a pervy chibi-face.
*v*
"Kuzu… Kuzu-chan, I think, I might be pregnant…" Hidan is spinning in front of the big mirror in Konan's room and has been the last twenty minutes. "I… I'm so dizzy! It's symptoms. I-I think I'm gonna throw up! FUCK."
*v*
Suddenly Pein crushes a glass to call everyone attention. He stands on the couch.
"I-I haven't been completely honest with you guys…" A shocked gasp from Tobi, "the reason I want to bring pain to the world, isn't because of peace or war or domination… That's BULLSHIT! Sorry I've been bullshitting you…
The real reason… The real reason, I wanna bring pain to the world… Is… That…
I-I'm a SUPER-MEGA-ULTRA-SADIST! MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Evil lightning flashes behind him as he gives off his very best villain-laugh.
Everyone are starring in dumbstruck silence until Konan finally burst out: "Well… Well, then it's lucky that I am a SUPER-MEGA-ULTRA-MASCOCHIST!" She dramatically rips the origami-rose out of her hair.
**V**
Later, Sasori had to admit, that poisoning the whole Akatsuki with a new, experimental drug, might not have been the best idea…
~ THE END ~
(Literally THE END… Deidara accidently blew up the whole Naruverse when he found out) sorry…