How annoying!

14 years old Harry Potter could NOT believe this.

He's sick in bed and got leave from school from a bad case of flu...

So how did he end up in here, in a big ass hall with loads of kids and adults in robes?

'Oh hell, I think my fever's getting to me...I'm in a Cultist Temple in my dreams.' Harry spoke in a nasally voice from his cold while holding an ice bag to his head and he was in his pajamas. 'A-a-ACHOO!'

'H-Harry Potter?' one of the students asked.

'Er, that's me, why? So who are you cultists? What crazy religion are you in?'

Cue WTH expressions.

'WE'RE NOT CULTISTS!' everyone yelled.

'Mr. Potter, we've been looking for you for years.' said the Merlin-wannabe with literal blue robes with moons and stars on it.

'What, to sacrifice me to your God? Hell no you creepy old man!' Harry retorted, forcing himself to stand up but swayed weakly. 'Even if this is a crazy flu-influenced dream, I'm not...dying by being a fucking human sacrifice by cultists!'

'For the last time we're not cultists!' an exasperated man cried, 'Look, someone entered your name in the Goblet of...'

Harry pointed a shaky finger at him and fired a wide blast of blue energy. 'Rei Gun!'

'EEK!' the female teachers freaked out.

'Protego Maxima!' the teachers cried, putting up a lot of shields.

'Please stop! We're not cultists sacrificing anybody!' a certain bushy-haired girl cried but she was ignored. 'Oh darn it, everyone take off your black robes! He needs to see we're STUDENTS not cultists so he'll stop!' she yelled. 'He needs to see our school uniforms!'

'I agree, these baggy robes really make us look like a cult!' cue frantic take-offs of their outer robes because the assault was getting nasty.

'OK, we're not cultists! Its freaking cold here we had to wear those!' said an older teenager and Harry saw it so he stopped.

'...uniforms?'

'Yes, its so cold here we really have to get covered.' said another student.

'Why not a thick wool coat? Those flimsy baggy blankets with sleeves are impractical.' Harry deadpanned. 'Not much heat-retention there. Man, my dreams are crazy tonight...'

'You're not dreaming!' some teens yelled with exasperation.

'I'm in bed in my apartment with a fever then I wake up here so this is obviously a dream!' Harry snarked. 'I can even fire a big blue beam like in comic books, I couldn't do that in real life!'

'Oh, for crying out loud~!'

'OK Mr. Potter,' a woman dressed like an amish nun(Harry thinks so at least) approached him and touched his forehead. 'My goodness! You're too hot to be off of bed! Your fever's terrible! To the infirmary you go young man!' and she dragged him off.

'...I really should wake up.' Harry sighed in resignation as he punched himself hard, only succeeding in knocking himself out and a black eye.

'Mr. Potter!' the nurse cried in aghast. 'That was uncalled for!' muttering darkly, she took out her wands and floated him away.

'...bloody hell...he still thinks he's dreaming?' a redhead boy from the red table choked out.

'You heard what he said, he was sleeping in his apartment with a fever and found himself here, what's he supposed to think?' snarked a young girl from the same table.

'...do we really look like cultists with a bad religion?' asked a student from the blue table.

'We do.' said his seatmate. 'In the muggle world, there's so many religions, many of which involve human sacrifice due to freaky beliefs wearing black robes like we do, no wonder he freaked out on us. Nobody wants to be sacrificed you know, even in a dream! They say if you die in a nightmare you'll never wake up ever again.'

'This, is bad...' one of the men by the podium choked out. 'Really bad! What do we do Albus? He clearly is not aware of who and what he is, convinced this is all a dream! He has no magical education yet someone put his name in...he'll lose his magic for sure!'

'Lose his magic? Forget that, he can't go past first task alone!' another man cried.

'This...is a problem...' the old man sighed. 'First, there is a way out.'

'THERE IS?!'

'Yes...Harry's name may be picked but as the Goblet picked his paper with his name on it, our culprit is clearly 17 or 18...or an adult.' said the old man grimly. 'And the Goblet of Fire recorded their magic when its flames touched their hands. In short, if our culprit who pretended to be Mr. Potter did not participate...THEY'RE the one losing their magic.'

'Oh, so the real Mr. Potter is safe and can safely recover from his fever then.'

'Yes. He's too young for zis Tournament and uneducated in magic, what a relief.' said a giant woman. 'He was convinced he's dreaming which is why he pulled that stunt of his earlier...they say in dreams, you can do what you normally can't do in real world he went by zat logic in what he believes is a nightmare. But what if he wakes up and still finds himself here and not at home?'

They did not see someone among them be as pale as a ghost from horror.

Especially when the Goblet of Fire flared to life, projected a fiery clawed arm and went for him to the hall's horror...

xxx

'Really now...' the nurse sighed as after forcing Harry to swallow some Potions, she dabbed his face with a Bruise-Removing Paste. 'How will he understand what happened is really no dream at all...?'

She fortified Harry's bed with various wards and protective spells when she heard a scream.

A man's bone-chilling scream as if he'd been Crucio-ed.

Shivering, she shook her head and summoned an elf. 'Tibbly!' a female elf showed up. 'Protect Mr. Potter from harm be it bad magic or bad potions. Stay invisible but let him know you are there for his needs and never leave his side even if I'm around. I need to go back to the feast. Do NOT allow ANYONE in unless its the faculty and unless they're injured or sick.'

'Yes, Madam Nursy!' Tibbly nodded as Madam Pomfrey left.

When she was gone, Harry woke up.

'...its not a dream after all...that weird lady is still here and that crappy medicine tasted TOO real.' Harry shuddered as he got up. 'Its so nasty I woke up.'

'Mr. Potter sir you no get up please! You still have fever yes?' Tibbly cried, hoping he wouldn't get up.

'Well its half gone whatever that foul tasting thing was. And I thought syrups from drugstores are crap.' said Harry with a grimace. 'Nurse lady said you'll do my requests as long as I'm in the clinic, right?'

'Yes!'

'Then go make me some soup in this particular recipe.' Harry smiled. 'Its what I eat when I feel sick since the one written in cookbooks is crappy and bland when the point is to eat to get better. Then bake bread in my specifications too when that nurse-lady gets back. For now, tell me everything I need to know.'

'Tibbly will do her best!'

xxx

'How is Mr. Potter Poppy?' Minerva McGonagall asked Madam Pomfrey as a group of Aurors took away a gray-skinned, withered-looking man whose expression was that of a frozen scream of pain and horror and the whites of his eyes showing. He looked like he was carved out of wood in a painstaking effort to make it extra-wrinkly and nothing but skin and bone now.

'I take it I missed something.' Madam Pomfrey deadpanned. 'I heard that scream all the way to my Infirmary.'

'Yes...Barty Crouch Jr. is alive and posing as Alastor...the Aurors are going to rescue him now while Barty's now a Squib.' said Professor Sinistra. 'So HE'S the one who put in Mr. Potter's name! Good riddance to bad blood I tell you!' she huffed, crossing her arms.

'But still, the students are spooked...they know what will happen to the Champions if they backed out.' said Professor Flitwick as they looked at the worried tables. 'We'll be having specialists study the Goblet soon.'

'I see...as for Mr. Potter, I gave him his first dose of Pepper-Up Potion and healed his bruise...makes me wonder what he'll do when he finds all this is not a dream.' the nurse sighed.

'There's that.' said Madame Maxime. 'But I heard he's missing for years? He's clearly healthy in appearance and unhappy about being kidnapped even in his fever-induced dreamworld.'

'Its a long story...'

"Yes, a long story indeed." Headmaster Dumbledore sighed in a pained expression. When he wakes up, he'd want a long chat.

xxx

Later that night...

The staff came to the Infirmary to see boy-wonder wide-awake and sampling sweets and writing down notes.

'Oh, you're awake, Mr. Potter!' McGonagall cried.

'So, finally believe this is reality now?' Snape snarked at him.

'Unfortunately.' Harry grumbled while writing down notes. 'Try being in a bad chill then kidnapped from your bed. I'm forced to accept this is reality when whatever tasted like crap woke me up real good.'

'Oh, what are you writing dearie?' Professor Sprout asked, interested.

'Notes on the magic popular sweets I had Tibbly get me...some are so sweet I wonder why aren't you lot Diabetic yet?' Harry sighed with an exasperated arm wave. 'Diabetes is an expensive maintenance illness you'll put up with for life and I hear kids here shop these things by the bulk.' he griped, waving an arm at the table of sweets and Cauldron Cakes, but only two per item. 'So I thought I'd try making my own at home when I get home in a 80-20 ratio of flavor and sugar if I could.'

'You're interested in food and health it seems.' Dumbledore smiled.

'With pigs I had the misfortune to call relatives, I'm very motivated to eat healthy.' Harry scowled as their faces fell.

'Yes...your...relatives.' Snape drawled. 'I can see ol' Tuney hasn't changed one bit when we dropped by to see when and why you never came to Hogwarts.'

'You know that horse-faced-bint?'

'Unfortunately. How your mother is related to her I have no idea.'

'Severus!' Dumbledore chided, the two getting along well on their shared dislike of Petunia Dursley. 'Now Mr. Potter, what happened to you all these years?'

'I learned how to use that power that enabled me to shatter Pig#1's fist then ran away...I hid somewhere while still going to school, only this time, I soared my grades since I no longer have to dumb down my grades in fear of a beating anymore if my grades are higher than Dudley's.' that, they already know but that doesn't mean they like to hear about it again! 'To fund my schooling and livelihood, I took to using illusions that I'm paying when I really wasn't. I graduated Elementary as a Valedictorian then moved on to Secondary School in Brighton since I wanted to live near a beach...that's after stealing my files from the Piggy Farm since I got my school files from the school so I can enroll myself. I'm in my Final Year of Key Stage 3 by the way. I can't afford to miss a single day as it is unless I'm REALLY sick since I have to take exams soon so I really need to go back home.'

'As for taking care of myself, I know how no thanks to my childhood but it proved useful. I know how to clean and cook so nobody can say I'm a kid who can't do anything without an adult. I'm proud to be independent.' Harry scoffed. 'I experimented on food since I don't want to be a human balloon with a short lifespan anytime soon and I have my own cookbook since and all my recipes, nothing fried about it. All grilled, steamed, baked and boiled, and nothing too fatty and too sweet. I already can't stomach your sweets as it is after years of eating carefully I wanna puke it away!'

'Looks like Mr. Potter's more into a Cook as his future career than any magic-related career.' said Madam Pomfrey with a smile. 'Did you ask Tibbly anything?'

'Yeah, about why everyone knows me and makes a big deal out of it I ended up learning the truth about my parents.' Harry sighed. 'And whoever said I defeated a Dark Lord as a baby? What drugs are they high on and where can I get some?' he demanded irately. 'Mum did something before dying, not a freaking baby! Whoever spread the story that an infant so-called defeated an ADULT dark wizard is clearly not right in the head! Or is this because of both Muggleborn Prejudice and Gender-Bias bullshit that a Dark Lord was defeated by a Muggleborn Witch who outwitted him with the last laugh? Serves him right!' he sneered.

He had no idea he got on Snape's good side who approved of his opinion. But also worried that if this gets out, he'll have a bigger target on his back for his words...

'Mr. Potter, language, but most people don't feel the same way you do.' said Dumbledore, shaking his head. 'And you just pointed out why. So you can do magic without a wand?'

'For years now, yeah. How else am I going to manage by myself and the Dursleys aren't going to pay for me after my justified self-defense?' Harry scowled. 'Sooo yeah, Illusion Magic it is. My life is safer in illusions. I ended up living in an out-of-the-way neighborhood where nobody asks questions but in return crime rate is high so I used illusions way too much to be safe. If I lived in a nice neighborhood by myself that also means nosy neighbors trying to pretend to mean well just to look good to others while butting in on someone else's life like they're some main character in a story.'

'That's kind of bad...'

'It is, but what can I do?'

'Well, you no longer have to use Illusions to pay when your family left you money, Mr. Potter.' said Dumbledore. 'I am safeguarding the key to your Trust Vault that your parents left behind as a precaution because the Main Family Vault requires an Adult Magic Signature of the family member's touch so you can't access that one yet.' he said, giving him a tiny key. 'Don't lose it. We'll take you to Gringotts tomorrow.'

'Right...in my pajamas?' Harry asked flatly.

'Of course not.' McGonagall sputtered.

'But don't you want to study magic here my boy?'

'Transitioning at such a late stage is a bad idea and it'll make my existence hard to explain as a result in society while the magicals know I exist with complete files.' Harry sighed. 'Home Tutor it is I guess. I'll go home tomorrow since a long exam on Math is coming up and the Math Teacher at school is a Jerk with a flagpole shoved up his ass who won't give make-up exams even if the students who missed are sick with a Medical Certificate justifying the absence and its already time for preparation for A-Level Exams, kinda like your OWLs.'

'Alright, we'll talk about your Magical Education tomorrow.' said Dumbledore as Tibbly is back with a tray containing a bowl of a golden-looking soup and a roll of bread with an unknown drink.

'Tibbly is back with Dinner Harry sir!' Tibbly chimed. 'Harry sir is right, this soup more yummy than sick soup we be doing for years!'

'Well, told ya.' Harry grinned.

'Can we keep recipe?'

'Sure.' said Harry kindly. 'I can even write down better bread recipes too if you like.'

'Yay!'

'Just bring me lots of paper and ink to write down stuff in! I need more practice using these stupid feathers to write on...'

'He's nice to House Elves even if he just saw one tonight.' said Professor Flitwick approvingly.

'He did say he's into healthy eating...' said Professor McGonagall. 'He'll probably criticize our usual menu if he could.'

'He probably would.' Dumbledore chuckled, knowing what they usually eat and what they're usually made of...

xxx

Next morning...the Daily Prophet came in.

FEVERISH KIDNAPPED BOY-WHO-LIVED THINKS
HE'S IN A NIGHTMARE SURROUNDED BY CULTISTS INTO
HUMAN SACRIFICE! WHAT MUGGLES BELIEVE IF THEY
SEE PEOPLE IN BLACK ROBES; HARRY POTTER'S FRANTIC
SELF-DEFENSE ATTEMPT, CHAOTIC!

BARTY JR. PRETENDING TO BE ALASTOR MOODY KILLED,
NOT JUST SQUIBBED BY THE GOBLET OF FIRE! CHAMPIONS
TERRIFIED OF THE PUNISHMENT MECHANISM!

HARRY POTTER FINALLY ACCEPTS REALITY! WHAT TRULY
HAPPENED: HIS OPINIONS KNOWN

MINISTRY OF MAGIC INVESTIGATING AZKABAN'S GRAVEYARD
AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE'S PUNISHMENT MECHANISM

Harry is also well enough to go out, after cringing from his final dose of Pepper-Up Potion after another breakfast of soup, Sunny-Side Up eggs and another bread roll while reading the newspaper.

'Jeez, they sure made a big deal out of this.' Harry sighed, putting the papers down.

'It can't be helped Mr. Potter, you're a known celebrity.' said Madam Pomfrey, also opting to have breakfast in the Infirmary just to watch over him.

'At least these people finally have their eyes open. Its my mum who killed her killer, not me. Its all I care about.' Harry sighed. 'She got her just credits albeit fourteen years late at least she still got it.' he said, satisfied.

'Get ready soon Mr. Potter, you'll be going to Gringotts soon with me. Everyone has their hands full with classes and the recent scandal.'

'OK.'