Every time I looked at the damn calendar, I wanted to punch my stupid brother in the face. Just staring at the flowery words he had written…I clenched my fists, looking away and stuffing my hands in my pockets. Why the hell did that potato bastard get to marry MY brother? Annoyed, I kicked the wall savagely, my teeth gritted as I put the stupid thing in its place.
"Ve~, what are you doing, Lovi?"
I turned around to find my brother staring at me with that brainless grin on his face, looking as idiotic as ever.
"Beating the shit out of the wall," I growled, before pushing past him and, fuming, going back to my room.
It wasn't like I could tell a person as dense as that that he was pissing me off. He would just start crying and whining and apologizing and piss me off even more! Throwing myself down on my bed, I glared at the ceiling accusingly, my eyebrows furrowed. Feli had always gotten everything from everybody his whole fucking life. Despite our parents telling us that they loved us the same, I'd always gotten less presents at Christmas. Nonno had made his preference clear from our birth, bringing Feli all kinds of toys, acting like I didn't even exist.
We were twins, damn it! Damn it…I clutched onto my pillow, throwing it angrily at the wall.
If Feli had all that, why did he get to have love too?
Enraged, I pulled my knees up to my chin and stared out the window at the bright, happy, sunny day feeling my disgust rising. Why was I even sitting here worrying more than the actual damn bride himself? Feli didn't look like he'd felt nervous at all and his wedding was tomorrow! I'd probably been the only one losing sleep over this.
"It's all that damn potato bastard's fault!" I buried my face in my hands miserably. "Who said he could have my fratello, anyway?"
"Fratello~, it's time to wake up!" Feli's voice chimed from the doorway, more annoying than any alarm I could have set.
Grumpily, I sat up and let the covers slide off my naked chest, pooling in my lap. The frigid air hit my bare skin, sending goose bumps across my body. "Damn it, Feli! Why's your damn wedding day so cold?" I yelled to nobody, yanking on my tux and not bothering with my hair.
Stalking out, I sat down at the table, watching my stupid brother flit around the kitchen, happily whistling as he cooked our breakfast. He never seemed to have any fucking worries, no matter what the hell he did. I grimaced at him, sulkily eating the pasta he had set out for me and absentmindedly wondering why he wasn't dressed yet.
He gave me his usual airhead smile and sat down across from me, saying, "Ve~, fratello, you look so nice!"
Embarrassed, I looked up at him angrily. "Why aren't you dressed yet? It's your own damn wedding!"
His mouth slipped into a sad pout. "I tried, but I couldn't figure out where everything went and how to put on some of the things and I didn't want to get the pasta on my clothes and I thought maybe you could help-" his voice slid into a high, hysterical pitch as he continued to babble frantically.
"Shut up and go put your clothes on!" I yelled, silencing him.
With a girly sigh, he told me, "But…I don't know how…"
I gave him a look of annoyed disbelief, crossing my arms across my chest and looking down at my own half-assed attempts to put the suit on right. "Well it's not like I know how to put on a damn suit either! Maybe you just shouldn't get married!"
Feli stared at me, stricken. "But I have to get married! Ve~, I love Wiggie!"
"Well then figure out how to put the tux on by yourself! I never wanted you to get married to that damn bastard anyway, but you don't listen to me, so you can deal with your own damn problems!" Thoroughly pissed, I went to the bathroom, only to hear Feli calling Ludwig up seconds later crying.
Grimacing, I stuck my toothbrush in my mouth. This was going to be a shitty day.
In the end, Ludwig (the bastard) ended up coming over to help Feliciano put his clothes on right. I watched from the doorway as he tied my fratello's tie, putting his big, meaty, fat bastard arms around Feli's shoulders gently, acting as if he were something breakable even while he was tying the thing. I had been sure such a monster wasn't capable of such delicacy and it pissed me off to see him acting all fruity and lovey around my dunce of a sibling. And stupid Feli was all smiles and Ve~s around him, too.
"Hey, you damn potato eater!" I intervened, infuriated by the intimacy. "Get the hell out of my house! I can take care of my fratello by myself!"
The German beast just stared at me, his blue eyes creepy as fuck. Finally, his voice quiet, yet demanding, he grumbled, his voice a deep bass, "That's not what Feliciano told me on the phone."
Unwilling to back down, I put my hands on my hips, giving him an evil smirk. "That's because he's too stupid to ask for my help to begin with!"
"Actually, that was because you were too stupid to learn how to tie a tie," he countered, his voice irritatingly calm as he gave Feli one last checkup.
Before I could argue any more, Feli bounced over with a smile and pecked me on the cheek. "Thank you for helping me with my wedding, Lovi!"
Blushing, I shoved him away, unable to meet his eyes as we piled into Ludwig's car.
The church was already pretty crowded when we arrived, full of the idiots Feli had just had to have at his damn wedding. Most of them were his friends from high school, people who he'd gotten along with effortlessly. A few of them were people he'd met when he went to college. Others were just old farts he'd entertained when he'd gone to some retirement home. It wasn't more than a hundred people, but to me, it felt like all of Italy was watching us.
Swallowing my fear, I went and stood in the proper place beside Feli as his best man.
I could feel my legs shaking as the service began, could feel all the eyes staring at me from the pews. Even the potato bastard's potato bastard brother was staring at me from his spot as the other best man, his red eyes devil-like as he watched me quiver with a smirk. I gave him my fiercest glare, wishing the whole damn thing would end already so I could go home and eat some pizza.
As the man marrying my fratello away from me droned on and on in his crappy monotone voice, I couldn't help but glance out at the audience. Their expressions ranged from teary-eyed, to bored as fuck, to daydreaming…there was even one man in the back texting. However…near the door there was another man, his dark brown hair wild and curly, that seemed to literally be looking straight at me, a wide, white-toothed smile on his face as his eyes followed my nervous movements.
What the hell? Was there something on my face? Distressed, I fidgeted absently, trying to imagine the bastard was just watching the wedding. What the fuck did I care, whether he was staring at me or not? Yeah, I looked like shit in the tux, but it wasn't my fault! He didn't need to look at me with those accusing fucking eyes like I'd done something wrong! He should just be watching the damn wedding like everybody fucking else was!
Anxious, I peered back over at him, unable to shake his gaze away.
Suddenly, I was desperate for the wedding to end, wanting to give this man a piece of my mind. Growing more and more irritated, I found myself curling my hands into fists, staring straight at him, watching his smile grow as he realized I was looking at him, too. His skin was a tan caramel frappuccino color, and even from here I could see the luminescent green of his eyes. Scoffing, I looked away again, only to be met with the cocky smile of the damn albino freak.
Feeling trapped between the creepy ass German and strange, unfamiliar bastard, I decided to just look at the ground, hoping my face wasn't too flushed from the rage and embarrassment.
By the time the wedding finally ended, I was ready to just leave and get some damn pizza from the nearest pizzeria, and possibly stop by a shop and pick up some expensive wine to help me wallow in my own self-pity, but Feli had other plans.
"Ve!~, fratello, let's dance!"
I glared coldly over at him from my spot at a secluded table, clutching my glass of champagne brutally. Couldn't this brainless idiot see I was wallowing? "Leave me the hell alone and go dance with your new potato sucker!" I ordered him, watching with malice as he blindly followed my orders.
Everyone seemed to be smiling and congratulating Feli for having found such a good man to marry, for his obvious success in his life, for the depth of his love…it made me want to puke. Feeling loneliness creep up on me again as I imagined my life without my brother, I poured myself another glass of champagne, hiccupping quietly as I drank.
"If you don't want to dance with him, amigo, I'd be happy to dance with you!"
I turned rigidly, the sound of the voice matching up with the man I'd seen earlier perfectly. Sure enough, the bastard was standing there, smiling like a fucking god in his perfect clothes, shining as brightly as the sun.
Instead of answering, I just looked away and took another sip of my drink, wishing I could just be drunk already.
Sensing that I didn't plan to answer, he took a seat across from me, his eyes cheerful as he assessed what I was trying to accomplish. "Ah, you don't like that your hermano is being taken away by that man? Or is it that you're jealous of his happiness?"
"None of your fucking business!" I spat, too down to be pissed off.
He gave a quiet laugh, a gentle sound that had my heart flying nervously. Grinning, his eyes saddened by my reaction, he told me, "Si, si. It isn't my business. But you look so lonely, Lovino…if it's possible, I'd like to take that loneliness away."
I stared at him in disbelief, my heart soaring even further as he took my hand in his. Shaking my head to clear my thoughts, I yanked away from him quickly, glaring and shouting, "Don't touch me, you bastard! I don't even know you!"
His eyes widened in momentary shock, before he bowed his head slightly, saying, "Of course! I apologize, but I feel like I've…known you for awhile. Feli and I have been friends since high school, and even though you refused to hang out with your brother's friends, I used to see you playing soccer alone after school…You see, I was on the team and often stayed late to help Coach clean jerseys. Every time I stayed, I would look out and there you would be on the field all by yourself, cursing as loud and kicking the ball as hard as you could into the net!" He laughed again, louder this time, like it was some kind of joke.
Surprised, I felt my face burn as I recalled those days when I'd gone to the soccer field to vent, thinking I was alone. "B-Bastard!" I stuttered, refusing to meet his eyes.
"Of course I'm sorry I didn't approach you then…but I just couldn't bear the thought of not getting to watch you play. You really were amazing!" He paused for a moment, and then, seeming to realize something, grinned. "My name is Toni."
It felt stupid not to say anything, but he already knew my name from my brother… "What, you don't have a last name?" I muttered sarcastically.
"Antonio Fernández Carriedo," he said, his eyes alight with amusement. "That's my name. I'm from Spain, but I'm sure you could already tell that!"
Stupidly, I hadn't noticed, but I didn't let him know, instead glaring at the dance floor where Feli seemed to be having the time of his idiotic life with that potato bastard. Spain…the country of passion. He seemed to fit the damn part too well as he gazed at me, his eyes filled to the brim with the same passion that titled his country.
"Do you like to dance? You seem like you'd be good at it from the way you looked playing soccer. Your body moves beautifully," he said, his voice seductive, intentionally or not, I wasn't sure.
Flushing scarlet, I couldn't help but spit, "Why don't you leave me the hell alone and go hit on somebody who gives a shit?"
He sighed, staring out at the dance floor like I had before, his expression cheerful. "Because, Lovino, even if I went out and hit on every person in this room, I would only have one face on my mind the entire evening! And that's yours! You've made such an impact on my heart, I'll never be able to forget you. Which is why, Lovi, I'm going to ask you to please accept my offer to dance."
Fuck. I could feel my face heating even darker with every word he said, every stupid compliment he gave me tightening my chest and making my head swim with confusion. Unless it was just the alcohol. Swallowing nervously, I could do nothing but gripe, "Who the hell said you could call me Lovi?"
With a stunning smile, he stood up from his seat, taking my hand lightly in his and walking over to where Feli was clinging to Ludwig, snuggling against him in a way that would have pissed me off insanely…before Antonio had shown his stupid face. Now all I could focus on was the beating of the Spaniard's excited pulse, the softness of his flawless skin as he forced me to dance with him, his expression filled with more love than even Feliciano's as he watched me.
The hours dwindled hurriedly away, the wedding no longer endless. Before I knew it, we were waving goodbye to my brother as he and his new bastard husband got into their love car and drove away, leaving me to spend a few weeks in an empty house with nothing good to eat.
If Feliciano wasn't the one cooking it, it was shit in my eyes.
My mind finally catching up to me now that the party was over, I collapsed into the nearest seat and buried my head in my arm, trying to stop the sobs from racking my body and drawing the attention of anyone who still happened to be here. My fratello was gone. I was alone. And I wasn't drunk.
"Lovi, what's wrong, tomate?" Antonio asked, his voice soothing.
Damn. I'd forgotten he was still here.
"None of your fucking business!" I shouted through my tears. "And who the hell are you calling a tomato?"
I could feel his hand on my back, rubbing comforting circles as he leaned over to talk to me, his voice very near me. "Tomatoes are my favorite food, little Lovi! And since you're my favorite person and you turn that beautiful shade of red every time I get too close to you, I wanted to give you a nickname that fit your personality!"
Without a retort, I just went back to crying, not even bothering to yell when I felt the Spaniards arms slip around me and pull me into a hug. It felt I had known this bastard, despite the fact that I hadn't recognized him at first. When he'd mentioned the soccer thing, I'd vaguely recalled seeing his face once or twice and thinking "who is this jerk and why the hell is he so shiny?" as he'd watched me vent curiously.
"Shh…shh…" Antonio cooed, holding my head softly, in the same gentle manner Ludwig had tied Feliciano's tie. "I know you'll miss him, Lovi, but Feli is happy with Ludwig! They'll always have each other, but that doesn't mean he'll ever forget you when he needs a helping hand. Which is a lot, knowing him. He loves you, more than you'll ever know."
"Shut up!" I sobbed, clutching the back of his shirt gruffly in my fingers. "I don't miss my fucking brother! He's annoying, just like you!"
Antonio gave a contented sigh, leaning over and kissing my forehead, brushing loose strands of hair from my tear-stained face. "I'll make sure you're never lonely, if you'll just let me be with you. I'll take care of you."
I tried to push away feebly, but his words were too enticing. There was nothing I was more afraid of than being left behind… and he'd picked up on that so easily, the stupid tomato bastard. "You don't even know me, damn it…" I grumbled, sniffling.
"True, I know nothing about you besides the Lovi I saw tonight…and he's the one who stole my heart."
My face heated up and I sputtered, "H-how can you say shit like that, bastard?"
He laughed, petting my head softly, his hand warm through my hair. "Because I love you!"
I shoved his hand away, crossing my arms and glaring out the window, wiping my eyes roughly with my sleeve.
"Lovi…I think it's time for you to go home. I'll be more than happy to escort you there, if you'll let me-"
"I can get home on my own, jerk," I mumbled, standing up and walking to the door.
"But, uh…I'm sorry, but it seems as if they took the car you arrived in, Lovino!"
Shocked, I ran outside to the parking lot, searching frantically for the damn potato bastard's car. It wasn't here…I spun on the Spanish asshole, ready to tell him the hell off for not mentioning this sooner, but he just smiled smugly. Was he making fun of me? Damn tomato bastard…
Holding up his own set of car keys, Antonio motioned to a nearby car and unlocked it. "Unless you'd rather walk home…?"
"St-stupid," I grumbled, averting my eyes and stomping over to the little vehicle.
Inside the car, I crossed my arms and glared out the window, watching the scenery of my everyday life flashing by while Antonio sat next to me, humming like an idiot. Somehow, the bastard had no problem finding my house…and within minutes I was stuck alone with him.
Ignoring the fact that he'd followed me to the door, I slammed the thing open and raged inside, still pissed that I was going to be spending the next few weeks cooking for myself. Speaking of food…my stomach growled ravenously as I imagined the pasta I wouldn't be eating while Feliciano was gone. Ignoring my hunger, I tromped into my bedroom and ripped off the suit, exhausted from the crappy day I'd suffered through.
"Ah, Lovi~! I never imagined you'd strip so easily for me!"
Shocked, I turned around to find Antonio staring at me, his eyes sparkling mischievously. Damn, I'd forgotten he was here…Embarrassment and rage fueling a heated blush, I ran to the door and slammed it in his dumbass face, yelling, "Get the hell out of my house, damn it!"
Groaning in pain, I heard Antonio get up, laughing through his suffering. "Okay, okay…I'm sorry, little Lovi, I just wanted to keep you company! But if you aren't in the mood and would rather be alone, I'll leave you be. Goodnight, mi amor…dream well!"
His footsteps echoing through the empty house, I listened intently until I heard the front door creak shut and his car drive away. When I was sure he was gone, I sat down on my bed, pulling my knees up the same way I had last night, and secretly wished Antonio hadn't given up so easily.
When I woke up the next morning, I was greeted with a severe pain throbbing in the back of my skull. Groaning miserably, I pulled the covers over my head and closed my eyes, ignoring the fact that I was late for work. It wasn't like I fucking cared about being a vender that much anyway…they could fire me if they wanted. It wouldn't make any difference to me.
The silence of the house was startling in comparison to how it had been just the day before. By now, Feli was usually running around the house, cooking breakfast and being the damn idiot he was, singing and cleaning. But today, the place seemed lifeless…lonely. There was nobody there to piss me off, nobody to yell at for doing stupid things. Nobody but myself.
"Damn it…" I groaned, ripping the blanket off myself and pulling on some clothes, sliding sleepily out into the kitchen for some breakfast.
The pounding in my head seemed to get worse with every step I took, causing my vision to flicker darkly. Dizzily, I made my way to the table and sat down, clutching my hair and gritting my teeth as the pain intensified nauseatingly. My stomach clenched furiously and I felt myself break out into a cold sweat. What the hell was going on? Sucking in a shaky breath, I laid my head down on the cold wooden surface in front of me and closed my eyes, my body appreciating the darkness and relaxing. Trembling, I felt my consciousness fade out slowly with the worst of the ravaging pain.
The first thing I noticed when I woke up again was the smell of delicious food. It permeated the air, swirling all around and enticing me just enough to crack open one eye. There at the stove, Feli stood humming an unfamiliar tune, his usual freaky apron look replaced by normal clothing…though it didn't seem like his taste at all. His hair was shorter and darker…and his body was much more masculine than usual…what the hell had happened while I'd been asleep?
"Feli…" I groaned, opening my other eye and rubbing them, exhausted. "When did you turn into a man?"
The man at the stove turned, his perfect hair bouncing gently with the movement. Instead of the innocent, spacey face of my brother, I was met with the smiling, sparkly face of some familiar stranger, his green eyes grinning right along with the rest of him. "Buenos dias, Lovino! I was worried that you were sick!" he announced, relief coloring his tone as he came over, brushing his soft hand across my sweaty forehead.
Sighing and feeling too hungry to protest, I didn't push him away. Last night's memories came flooding back into my mind with the touch of his warm skin; the wedding, how he had been watching me during the ceremony, the after party where he'd forced me to dance, saying goodbye to fratello, crying like a sissy while he'd held me, being followed into the house…Wait, why the hell was he in my house?
"Damn it, you better have a good excuse for being back in my house, bastard!" I snarled, waking up from my migraine stupor.
"Of course, little Lovi~!" he said, his eyes innocent. "Last night I promised you that I'd help teach you how to put on a suit properly!"
I narrowed my eyes at him, trying to remember exactly when the hell I'd agreed to a dumb promise like that. Maybe I'd been thinking it, but I was sure as hell I'd never said anything out loud.
He stroked back my hair again, dodging my thrash of retaliation. "You're too easy to read, tomate! You looked so uncomfortable on the altar, it almost felt as if you were asking me to help you."
Slinking down in my chair, I stared crossly over at the stove. "Well, I didn't, so just get the hell out…" I muttered, embarrassed again. "And who the fuck said you could use my kitchen?"
"I figured you'd be hungry! After all, it was your brother who did the cooking, si?" he murmured, sitting down beside me and gazing over, his hand resting gently on his chin as he studied my reluctance. "I tried my best to make it as well as I could for you!"
I gave him a sour glance before standing up and getting a bowl of whatever the hell it was, sitting back down slowly. "It smells like shit!" I spat, prodding the lumps in it with my spoon a few times. "What the hell is this?"
He shrugged, getting his own bowl and taking a tentative bite, seeming please before digging in happily . "Well, Lovi, you didn't have any ingredients that I knew how to cook with, so I just threw a bunch of things into a bowl…but it's delicious!"
His voice left no room for doubt. Giving him one more disgusted look, I took my own tiny bite of the foreign crap, swallowing slowly. It WAS delicious…Seeing him smiling over at me like that, though, I couldn't let that bastard win. I grimaced, my face reddening as he watched my reaction hopefully. "B-bastard…"I grumbled, shoveling more into my mouth, but only because I was starving, damn it.
"What do you think?" he asked excitedly, watching me as I struggled to contain my expression. "Will you keep me around a little longer, Lovi?"
His question, in spite of his stupid face, was serious…it took me off guard. Sputtering, I couldn't grasp onto an answer in my head besides the obvious one. "G-GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE!" I found myself yelling at him, throwing the first thing my hand could find at him. "I don't even know you, you bastard! How the hell did you get in here, anyway?"
He caught my projectile tomato easily, though his shiny smile had faded into nothing more than a glorified frown. "But you do know me! We spent the latter years of high school at the same lunch table…if I remember right, you were always protecting your brother from "the idiots" that were his friends and flying into cute little rages over the smallest things…" His smile had returned, a distant look to his eyes now as he remembered some shit that probably had never happened.
Now that he mentioned it, though, I did remember sitting with Feliciano a few times during lunch, just so I could fend off that damn potato bastard. I'd never known any of their names…and Antonio had changed since high school. His hair was shorter and he was less…awkward and gangly than he had been. Even his smile seemed to shine brighter, more confidently. I looked pretty much the same as I had then…
"Who're you calling cute?" I grumbled, getting up and throwing my dish into the sink. "Damn it, don't look down on me!"
He seemed surprised. "I'm not looking down on you~! It's such a rare thing for a big grownup adult to be so cute! It's a compliment!" With no shame at all, he wrapped his arms around me where I stood washing the bowl.
The warmth and closeness of his body shocked me silent, the feel of someone else holding me a temporary relief to my relentless migraine. My lip trembling in inexpressible anger, I looked over my shoulder to try and yell, only to see that his cheeks were flushed just like mine, his eyes burning brightly with the same excitement. It was stupid, I told myself, to let my mind go blank in the presence of a tomato bastard like this, to let myself be swept away by some asshole who I'd met yesterday, who I barely even knew. But it didn't stop me from letting it happen, even when he'd spun me around and pulled me into my very first kiss.