1Camping

Fox owns 24 and all its characters. This is just for fun, brought on by unrequited 24-addiction in the wake of the writers' strike.

The following takes place three weeks after Day 6, in the Canadian Lakes. It is nearly sun-down. The sky is clear and the deep chill of night descends on the scene.

Josh Bauer clutched his belly and ran as fast as his shaky legs could carry him into the trees. Jack didn't raise an eye-brow, but breathed deeply the clean air of the pine-forest and continued to watch bubbles form on a cup of water which was perched above a small fire.

It wasn't the start to the trip that Jack had expected. It was just meant to be a chance to spend some time in the outdoors with Josh. Jack, at least, recognised his need to get out of LA. He was eternally grateful to Kim for allowing him to spend time with her. But the constant activity, the noise, the chatter, was difficult to bear. Not to mention sitting down at the dinner table with a son-in-law who happened to be a psychologist specializing in PTSD. Though Jack would never have admitted it, there were times he longed for the quiet solitude of his cell in China. It enough to drive anyone to drink.

Josh, meanwhile, had had his own demons to battle. Marilyn had said the break would do him good and mentioned something about 'male-bonding.'

But after just a day in the canoe, Josh had been overcome by a bad case of diarrhoea and vomiting. Jack had had to 'up paddles' and start digging a latrine. Twenty-four hours later Josh had exhausted their supply of toilet roll. Still, Jack mused, the boy wasn't complaining. If anything, the sickness made Josh quieter than his usual self, which suited Jack. And they were, at least, spending time together.

An ashen-faced Josh emerged from the trees and sat with Jack by the stove. Wordlessly Jack poured water from a Jerry-can over Josh's outstretched hands to allow him to wash. The boy's body shook with the shock of cold water, and he attempted to dry his hands by the flames. Jack handed Josh a cup of soup.

'Uncle,' Josh said shakily, 'I don't think I can.'

'Force yourself. Two sips. It comes up, it comes up, that can't be helped. Trust me, it's your least unpleasant option.' Jack said firmly.

'What's the other option?' Josh asked, his teeth now chattering.

'I put soup powder under your tongue.'

Josh looked shocked.

'Dehydration.' Jack said by way of explanation, 'You need salt. You got a headache yet?'

'I thought if you were dehydrated you needed water. Salt makes you thirsty.'

Jack gave Josh a penetrating stare. 'Next time you're in school, and they do science, pay attention. Now, drink your soup.'

Reluctantly, Josh took a sip. Jack seemed to relax and sipped from his own cup.

'I don't get it.' said Josh. We eat the same food, drink the same water. I get sick, you don't.'

'I already met most bugs. You get immune after a while.' Jack continued with his soup.

'One more mouthful.' And he watched to make sure Josh complied.

'Uncle, can I ask you something? Only, my dad never talked about when you were kids. Did you and dad always fight?' Josh asked.

'That's what brothers do.'

Josh put his cup down.

'No, we didn't always fight. In fact, we were pretty close. I got into more fights protecting him. In our school a kid with glasses – got teased. We had some fun together. Good scrapes.'

'Like what?' Josh asked.

Jack was silent. He gave Josh no indication that he had even heard, although the boy was sitting right next to him. Josh pulled out an extra sweater from the low two-man which was set up nearby, and put it on. Jack stared into the flames. He seemed to register neither Josh's presence nor the increasing cold, but the hairs on his bare arms were erect.

Then after a long time, he spoke. 'So, my friend's brother, one day he crashed his motorbike. Couldn't afford a new one, so he gave us his foot pump. Said he didn't need it. And we thought this was great way to make money. We thought, well, Grae thought, we could check the tyre pressures on all our neighbour's cars and charge them for it. Dime a car. And then I thought, wouldn't it be better if all the tyres were flat, then we could charge more – dime per tyre, that's 40 cents per car. So we thought we could sneak out at night, let the air out all the tyres, then go round Saturday morning and get some cash.'

'And nobody would get suspicious.'

'No.' Jack smiled. 'No one.'

'What happened?'

'Well, we let the air out alright. Didn't get caught at that. Waited till about 2am, then crept out. That was fun.'

'How many cars?'

'About half the cars in the street. It was a small street. We didn't do your grandpa's. We didn't dare do his.'

'And no one would suspect anything?'

'We knew they would know it was vandals, but we didn't think they would work out it was us. So, come morning, we set out, knocked on the first door, ma'am, did you notice your tyres were flat, would you like us to sort that for you, ma'am? And we set to work. Of course, she went straight round to see my Dad. And they worked it out immediately. Then there was trouble.'

'What did Grandpa do?'

'He went and did all the tyres quick as anything. We had to go round, apologise and offer to do chores. And all the neighbours were told not to give us anything to eat, just water. So we mowed lawns, washed dishes, whatever they wanted, we did. All day long.'

'I guess you had that coming.'

'We did,' Jack smiled, 'Then there was the woodshed.'

'What do you mean?'

'So once we were finished all the chores for all these people, we had to go down the woodshed with Dad. We knew the drill. There was a lecture, then it was pants down and he would use his belt. Only for serious stuff, you know. So this time Grae went first. And I felt bad about that coz it was my fault, it was my idea. Then it was my turn. Only problem was, I'd got shot in the butt just a couple of days before, so I…

'Wait, wait. How'd you get shot in the butt?'

'That was Grae. We had this air-pistol and we used to take it down the quarry and shoot cans. Great fun. I was putting the cans out, Grae had the pistol. He said it was an accident… I don't know. Anyhow, we got the pellet out…'

'How'd you get it out?'

'Grae got it out. With a potato peeler. He made a right mess, kinda left a hole in my butt-cheek. Thing is, it had stopped hurting, so I'd really forgotten about it. So anyway I'm leaning over and Dad says to me, Jack, how'd you get that hole in your butt? And, if I'd been smarter or quicker I would have thought up some story. I could have said, I sat on a nail or something. Maybe he'd have believed me. But you know, I was tired and hungry. I was ashamed of what I'd done, and I wasn't looking forward to what was coming. I wasn't at my best. All I could think of to say was, what hole?'

Josh laughed out loud.

'You having your soup?' Jack asked. Josh shook his head.

'I'll take it then.' Jack was not hungry or thirsty, but they had limited supplies and he couldn't bear to see anything going to waste.

'So what did Grandpa say then?' Josh asked.

'Then he poked me, hard, and said, this hole. I gotta tell you, I just about hit the roof. What could I say? So of course he didn't just leave it. He grilled me and he grilled me and he grilled me. And I'm trying not to look at Grae. And Grae's trying not to look like he knows. So then he sends Grae away and tells me it looks like I've been shot.'

'You didn't wanna squeal on my dad.'

'I didn't wanna squeal on Grae, I didn't wanna squeal on myself, and I did not want them to find the pistol and take it away. But I had to tell him something. So in the end I said that it was just an airgun and it was an accident and it wouldn't happen again. That I couldn't tell him who I was with, and can he please just give me whatever I'm due for the tyres thing.'

'And?'

'And he did. And then he handed me over to my mom. She was a great woman, it's a shame you never knew her. Anyway, Mom and Dad had the good cop-bad cop routine down to a fine art. So, first Mom feeds me, then she gives me this line about how worried she is about me.'

'Worried?'

'Hmmm. Worried that older boys have been using me as target practice and maybe making me do other things that I didn't want to do. Inappropriate things. So I told her that wasn't happening. But she just kept on and on and on. And one thing I never learned to do was to lie to my mom. She could always tell. So then she said that I was obviously protecting someone, and she was going to talk to all my friends' moms about it. And then I broke. I just couldn't take it any longer. I told her the truth. So she asked me where the gun was. And I told her, under my mattress, where I kept it. So we went there. But what I hadn't counted on was that Grae knew I would break in the end. He was not stupid. So, while Mom and Dad were distracted with me, he snuck into my room and smuggled it out. So we went there, no pistol.'

'She told Grandpa, right?'

'Right. And then it got real bad. Because not only was I protecting someone, but I was also lying to get Grae into trouble.'

'Did they ask him about it?'

'Of course, he denied everything. He was very good, was your dad…'

'Leaving you in deep shit.'

Jack gave Josh another penetrating stare, but decided to allow the language. Josh was, after all, almost an adult.

'All that mattered was that we got to keep the pistol. They never found out about it. Grae did the right thing.'

'But what happened that night?'

'Well, I realised there was no point sticking to my story. But I couldn't really make anything up either. I mean, I could hardly accuse my friends of doing something they never did. So I just kept quiet. I mean I said nothing. Not even to Grae. Didn't speak until the next day.'

'But he must have punished you again?'

Jack nodded. 'Hmmm. But I think Mom spoke to him. At least he didn't use his belt.'

They both sat in silence.

Jack didn't answer. 'How you feeling now?'

'Headache's a bit better.'

'Here, I left you a bit more soup.' Jack offered Josh his cup back.

'No I don't want it, thanks.'

'Take it anyway,' said Jack.

Josh realized this was not an invitation. He took a sip of cold, salty soup and, with effort, swallowed.

Eventually Josh spoke. 'Dad never said much about when you were kids. He never really talked about you at all.'

Jack nodded.

Josh chuckled. 'I'm not sure I buy that he shot you in the butt and you didn't get him back.'

'I never said I didn't get him back.' Jack growled quietly.

'What did you do?'

Jack didn't reply. Eventually he picked up both cups and said, 'I'm going to turn in. You should try to sleep.'

'Yes uncle.'