Blurb: Because you don't just go back to being normal after saving the world. A girl finds herself unable to cope with the nonviolence of normal life, and a medical student finds himself irrevocably intrigued by her. (M for violence and sexual themes)
ooOoo
"How would you describe yourself?"
The girl very nearly fidgets on the plush leather sofa she is sat upon as she ponders the inane question like one would a particularly difficult riddle. In a way, perhaps, a riddle is exactly what it is, for it surely couldn't be answered quite so simply. Discounting the utter... surrealism of her past (which she knows for a fact she couldn't talk about, to anyone, not really), her own thoughts - ones of herself especially - are always complex, often circumlocutory, and are never quite as simple as A+B=C.
How would you describe yourself?
Is an answer really necessary? Or wanted? She'd come here to be fixed, not to be interrogated. Surely they don't really care about her answer, the question is hardly psychoanalytical in design and execution. In fact, it borders on stupidly sentimental.
(Blood. Rich and thick with a stench reminiscent of rust. It coats her hands like a well-worn glove of wet, irrefutable accusation.)
'You have blood on your hands'
How would you describe yourself?
The answer to the question involves near-unspeakable past acts and choices, a disturbingly frequent dream involving spiders and some stupid rock and congealing blood, and a constant ache deep in her bones to do something. To fight. To struggle. Her answer involves murder and half-remembered multiple attempts at rape of her person and rotting bodies and betrayal and insurmountable odds and-
"I think..."
- and shouldn't she be glad that it's all over now? Shouldn't she be all for moving on with her life - her very normal life - since she'd fought so hard for it? Kagome often wonders-
(Trembling hands wrapped around a dead cat with a broken neck. Harsh panting breaths. Flushed cheeks. Soaked underw-)
- wonders how well she truly knows herself. If she even knows herself at all. And if she can't be sure of the latter, then how could she possibly describe herself? How does one describe the unknown? How can one map uncharted waters?
"I think..."
Perhaps she's just feeling defensive. Fine. Maybe she does know that something's wrong. But she came here, didn't she? Shouldn't that count for something? What right did they have to glean her thoughts, the screams and sighs of her own soul? Who do they think they are?
But... she needs this. To get better. She knows that. She's always been emotional and a bit off her rocker, but she's never been stupid. There's something wrong with her, and-
How would you describe yourself?
"I think, Dr. Ootori, that I'm someone who needs help."
ooOoo