Carrie Underwood – Just a dream
I don't own any characters or shows/movies affiliated with this story.
I've been liking the one shots, and wanted to do something sad. So I picked the saddest song I've heard and the saddest movies I've seen and put them together…depressing, huh!
We were sitting in his pickup, looking up at the stars. I leaned against him more, making me feel safer than I could ever be, and sighed.
"You're thinking about it aren't you?" He said it with a smile but I heard the worry in his voice.
"What are you talking about?" I said thinking it would come out like I honestly didn't but there was really no way of hiding it.
"Evelyn…it's against the rules!" He looks at me with that cute face of his.
"What rules?"
"Tonight, Evelyn…is just for us. We can be together, and we don't have to worry about tomorrow or the rest of our lives. It's you and me right now, and that's all that matters to me," He said sweetly. For the millionth time today I felt the tears rise in my eyes. All that I could think of, was that tomorrow; he was going to be gone. "Hey," He says realizing the way I am feeling and turns my head towards him.
"I'm sorry," I say as I wipe away the tear that had escaped.
"You don't have to be sorry…everything is going to be ok…ok?" He says as his hand slips behind my ear. I shake my head yes and as I close my eyes I feel his lips on mine and he lingers there for a few seconds before pulling away.
"I love you, you know that?" He says to me in his romantic voice and I shake my head yes.
"I love you, too," I whisper to him.
The next day I'm doing my hair, makeup, and putting my dress on. I already know that Rafe loves my hair curled, so it's that way today. I put on natural tones of eye shadow with just the slightest touch of purple, then eyeliner and mascara. I've given myself several pep talks already. I have no bridesmaids since this is such a last minute thing. I carefully pull my dress into the car and closed the door.
It was two weeks after the day she turned 18
All dressed in white, goin' to the church that night
She has his box of letters in the passenger's seat
Six pence in a shoe, somethin' bored, somethin' new
And when the church doors opened up wide
She put her veil down, tryin' to hide the tears
Oh, she just couldn't believe it
She heard the trumpets from the military band
And the flowers fell out of her hands
That was the day that I married the man of my dreams. It was beautiful; dream dress, dream man. We had spent the only time we had left in each other's arms. I surprised myself by not crying until the next day when I woke up. I had a smile on my face as I woke up. My hand wandered over to the empty spot where Rafe had been laying the night before. I looked around the room and saw he was in the shower in the bathroom. My head fell back onto the pillow and that's when I started to cry. I put my face in the pillow and tried to stop but I just couldn't. It was still dark out and with the window open I could hear the crickets chirping. I heard the door to the bathroom open and I quickly tried to wipe away the tears but I just couldn't do it quick enough.
"Oh, Evelyn…" He sets the things in his hands down and walks over to the bed. "Please, don't cry…it's hard enough as it is. I wish I didn't have to go…but I have to, I really do."
"I know…I just don't want to believe it," I told him. He shook his head yes and poked my hip to make me scoot over so I do.
"Everything is going to be just fine…We have so much ahead of us, so much planned and I won't let that go to waste."
"You promise?"
"I promise." He sounded so confident.
"Ok…"
"Now…I have to head out…"
"What!" I jump up to look at the clock. "What time is it? Why didn't you wake me up?" I was freaking out.
"Evelyn…There is nothing that you could've done…I just got up and got ready."
"But I could've been with you…" I said almost crying.
"I know…I know…but I did what I thought and still think is best." His hands were wrapped around my head and I shook my head as if to agree with him.
"I have to go now…" I sat up and got out of bed. I had been dreading this moment for the past month.
You put your two small bags in the trunk of your car; the one that we had spent all those times just sitting and talking, or the first time you took me on a date. You looked at me and for a moment I wasn't sure what to do; should I be strong and just give you a hug, or do I break down like I want to and cry my heart out. Suddenly your strong arms are around me and I just take it all in. I want to be strong but I cry, I cry hard. After a few minutes of that dramatic scene you pull back and look at me for one last time. I look at you for one last time. You kiss me for one last time. One last time, until you come back that is. Or so I think.
Baby why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go?
I was countin' on forever, now I'll never know
I can't even breathe
It's like I'm from a distance, standin' in the background
Everybody's sayin', he's not comin' home now
This can't be happenin' to me
This is just a dream
It was a Sunday, I love Sundays. I had been reading my favorite book when the doorbell rang. Mom was on her way over, but she never rang the doorbell. I opened the door and when I saw the man standing there I knew that something was deathly wrong. He handed me an envelope and it wasn't the kind that you felt good about getting. I quickly opened it and read it.
"Oh, god," I whisper. The tears are already flowing down my cheeks and the Marshal standing in front of me puts his hand on my shoulder.
"I'm very sorry. I understand how you are feeling. My brother died in war." He gave me a sad smile and walked back to the jeep that had gotten him here. You don't know how I feel.
It's just a dream.
The preacher man said, "Let's bow our heads and pray."
Lord, please lift his soul and heal his hurt
Then the congregation all stood up and sang
The saddest song that she ever heard
A week later, I'm driving back to that church, the one that I had gotten married in not that long ago to a man I loved. I still love him. His letters that he had sent me in the short time we were apart are in the passenger's seat and I keep glancing over at them. I'm wearing black, not that I choose to. I walk into the church and it's a sea of black that I hate. I want to run away, I don't want to be here. I am not crying. I'm being strong. I sit in the front of the church as the preacher begins the funeral. I have Rafe's handkerchief in my left hand and a white one that I will actually use.
This can't be happening.
I can feel everyone's eyes on the back of my head, they are all staring at me. The recent bride of Rafe McCawley, is now a widow. The funeral is over and the coffin is now taken to the cemetery. I don't want to go. I want to sit at home and cry, but I drive myself there; I have to be strong for him, for my love.
And then they handed her a folded up flag
And she held on to all she had left of him
Oh, and what could've been
And then the guns rang one last shot
And it felt like a bullet in her heart.
Everyone was gone, and now I was leaning on the casket of my own husband crying, the flag in my hands. The ground was wet but I just sat on my knees, curled up beside him. The makeup that I had so expertly applied this morning was now smeared across my face. My chest felt constricted and I was sucking in air, trying to get enough into my lungs. My sobs were coming out louder and louder. I crawled backwards and looked at the coffin. I feel something welling up inside of me. I let it out.
"You promised me," I yell at him. "You promised me it would all be alright! I trusted you!" I stand there on my knees for a moment and then put my face in my hands. "You promised…" I whisper. I feel a hand on my back. I thought I was alone. I look up and I see Danny. Danny Walker; my late husband's best friend. He had been stronger than any of my family, he was the one that had come over when I called him, he held me when I cried. Now he was here, waiting for me.
"Evelyn." He just looks at me, his handsome face creased from sadness. He just lets out a sigh. "Let me take you home." My chest feels lighter and I feel a little better. I look him in the eyes as he puts a hand out and I look at it and then back to him.
"I'm pregnant."