Chapter One

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"So how have you been coping since our last session, Hermione? Any issues?" Asked Julie Sawyer, eyeing the girl who was currently curled up on the hard sofa in the therapist's office.

Hermione shook her head as she fiddled with a loose thread that she found in the cuff of her jumper. This would be her ninth weekly session with the magical therapist and, while she found it extremely useful to be able to discuss her many issues with the kind, warm woman, her sessions always started out in the same way; hestitant and quiet.

"No issues as such, no." Hermione murmured quietly.

In truth her week had been... Quiet. She had spent some time with Blaise, at his insistence, but other than that her time had been spent attempting, and failing, to bury herself in books in an attempt to escape the monotony and loneliness that had become her reality.

"Is there anything particular you feel the need to discuss today?" Julia asked kindly.

"Nothing that springs to mind." Hermione told her, briefly glancing up to smile shakily at the therapist before immediately returning her attention back to her sleeve.

"Ok," the woman smiled, "In that case, I would very much like to return to the issue of Eloise. If you feel ready, of course."

Hermione froze in her fiddling and closed her eyes. Eloise... Though being the main reason for these sessions, her alter ego had only been mentioned very briefly in her initial appointment. Was she ready to discuss her? Would she ever be able to move forward with her life if she didn't? Sighing heavily, she lifted her eyes to meet the therapist's and nodded curtly.

"Excellent," Julia grinned, turning and picking up a newspaper clipping from the side table before placing it gently on the coffee table in front of her. Hermione looked down at it. "How dyou feel when you look at this?" she asked, gesturing to the clipping.

Hermione leaned forward and picked up the paper, leaning her elbows on her shaking knees as she stared at it. Gazing back at her was a moving image of Eloise Aintree, as familiar to Hermione as her own reflection, smiling sweetly and laughing at something that remained unseen off camera.

"Honestly?" Hermione asked timidly, glancing at the older woman who nodded encouragingly. "Angry."

She watched as Julie nodded and noted something down on her clipboard before turning back to Hermione and waving her hand, indicating that she wished for her to elaborate. Hermione sighed before continuing.

"Angry at myself, I guess, for creating her. Angry at that he could love her so much and yet hate me." She muttered, throwing the clipping back onto the table and relaxing back into the couch.

"'He' being Draco, correct?" The therapist asked.

Hermione winced and nodded. This had been her only reaction to hearing his name throughout the her sessions. She couldn't help the pain that fell over her and clenched her heart at the mere thought of him. His reaction, the look on his face when he had discovered the truth that day in St Mungo's... That image was burned in her memory and try as she might, she found it impossible to forget.

"Do you miss her?" Julia asked and Hermione frowned. "Eloise, I mean?" she clarified.

"No." Hermione said, still frowning. "I don't miss being her or the fractured life she represented... I do miss what she had though."

Julia nodded and made some more notes before turning back to Hermione, waiting for her to continue speaking. When she realised that Hermione was not going to elaborate, she thankfully changed the subject.

"How is your relationship with..." She flicked to her notes from their previous sessions, "Blaise?"

"He has been incredibly supportive." Hermione supplied, smiling gently at the thought of her friend. "We have become very close."

"Is this relationship likely to develop into one that is romantic in nature?" The woman asked.

Hermione snorted. She remained both shocked and amazed that Blaise's blatant homosexuality remained hidden from the wizarding world at large. It had taken her a while to see it, but now that she had, it was blaringly obvious. She shook her head and started laughing at the very thought of a romantic relationship with the man.

"As Blaise would say, I am 'somewhat lacking in his equipment of choice." She laughed and the therapist cocked her eyebrow. "Blaise is gay."

"Ah, I see!" Julie chuckled with sudden understanding, "And how is your relationship with your other friends? Any changes in that respect?"

Hermione sighed, thinking of Harry and the Weasleys. The truth was, once the truth had been exposed, her oldest friends had turned their back on her. They saw her long relationship with Draco as the ultimate betrayal. On top of all of her other secrets and lies... Well, they had not yet found it within themselves to forgive her. Not that she could blame them.

"No change." She muttered, shaking her head tiredly.

The timer on Julia's desk chimed and Hermione looked up in surprise. Had it really been an hour already? Julia stood and silenced the alarm before putting her notes down on her desk and turning back to Hermione.

"How are you getting on with your Anti-Depressant potion?" She asked, eyeing Hermione carefully.

"Alright, I think. I've definitely not been feeling any worse..." Hermione said, frowning, "Though I'm not sure I'm feeling much better, either."

She had been prescribed the potion immediately upon her release from St Mungo's and had been taking it religiously ever since. While she didn't like relying on medications of any sort to help her find happiness, she knew that right now she just needed the potion in order to functiong properly. Without it... She didn't want to know of where she might be.

"I'm going to suggest that you double the dosage, Hermione." Julia advised and Hermione nodded. "I would say that you double your daily intake to two drops, as opposed to just the one. Preferably one in the morning and one in the evening. Is that agreeable?"

"Yes, thank you." Hermione said, smiling tightly.

"Ok, you're booked in for next week, as always. I'll see you then."

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Hermione pulled open the door to the Leaky Cauldron and stepped inside, searching the grimy pub for the familiar face of her only remaining, and rather surprising, friend. Smiling as she found it, she pushed through the gathered patrons and dropped a kiss on Blaise's cheek before sliding into the booth opposite him.

"Hello lovely!" He greeted with a grin, "How was today's session?"

"Same shit." Hermione shrugged as Blaise pushed a tankard of Butterbeer across the table to her. "She's increased my Aunty Dee though." she grimaced.

Blaise let out a loud bark of laughter at her use of their designated nickname for her Anti-Depressant potion and she grinned, taking a sip of her frothy drink. They had started to use the nickname in an attempt to hide the true nature of their conversations in public, hoping to hide some of her woes from the the wizarding world.

"That's good, right? Hopefully it'll help." Blaise said kindly, "What did you talk about?"

"Eloise." Hermione groaned and heard Blaise gasp. Hermione nodded, "How do I feel about her? Do I miss her? All that crap."

"And?" Blaise prompted.

"And I feel angry and I don't miss her." Hermione provided, turning her attention to her drink which was cradled between her hands.

"Angry?" He asked confusedly and she nodded.

"That he can love her and not me, even now he knows the truth." She muttered.

Blaise reached his hand out across the table and Hermione placed hers into it, smiling when she felt him squeeze her's in quiet support.

"'Cause he's the worlds biggest prat, lovely. I've told you this." He said seriously and Hermione couldn't help but chuckle.

She knew that he hadn't seen his best friend at all since the day he had given Draco the letter. He had, it seemed, dropped off the radar. It didn't stop him appearing regularly in the Daily Prophet though, each time pictured in a romantic situation with a different girl. Each photo and article was like a dagger to her heart and she was infinitely glad of her friendship with Blaise, having his support when everybody else she loved had seemingly abandoned her.

The stocky italian had become her rock since the truth had emerged. He was almost always capable of distracting her quite easily and on the rare occasion that he couldn't, he never grumbled or complained about holding her as she shed her tears. He had been completely supportive and wonderful and Hermione made sure to let him know that she was grateful on a daily basis, though he always waved her off as if it was no trouble.

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The unexpected friends ended up returning to his apartment for a movie and junk food binge, as they often did on the days following her therapy appointments. Blaise, she had discovered throughout the course of their friendship, had a particular soft spot for chick flicks and they had just finished watching Mean Girls when Blaise went into the kitchen to get some more snacks. Hermione remained in the living room, looking through his DVD collection when she froze at the sound of an all too familiar, arrogant drawl.

"I swear, mate, these girls don't possess a single brain cell betwe-"

Hermione stood frozen, concentrating her eyes on an unrecognised DVD spine, unable to look at him as he suddenly stopped talking. Presumably had spotted her from the doorway of Blaise's living room. Feeling her emotions threaten to overwhelm her and her heart begin to pound in her chest, Hermione turned abruptly and frantically gathered her belongings before rushing in the direction of Blaise's fireplace, desperate to escape.

"Granger?" Draco spoke, just as she was about to step into the flames.

She turned slowly to look at him and desperately tried to restrain her tears at the cold look in his eyes and the sneer that curled his lips unattractively.

"Might want to invest in a hairbru-"

Draco didn't get to finish his sentence before she threw herself forward and dissappeared, sobbing, away from the apartment. Draco sighed and pulled his hand from his pocket, where he had shoved it at the sight of her in an attempt to hide the fact that he was shaking, and brought it up to cover his eyes. Dragging it roughly down his face, he turned and almost jumped out of his skin when he saw Blaise leaning against the doorframe into the kitchen, glaring at him.

"Was there really any need for that?" Blaise snapped angrily and Draco shrugged.

"What was she doing here?" Draco returned, apparently unaffected.

"We were watching movies." Blaise told him curtly, turning away from his friend and disappearing into the kitchen before shouting back, "Where have you been, Draco?"

Blaise rolled his eyes when he heard Draco snicker as he sauntered into his kitchen. His friend leaned against the wall next to the door and dropped his head back against it, smirking.

"Oh you know. Here and there." He said arrogantly and Blaise turned on him, angry at his nonchalant behaviour.

"Slagging it around, I hear?" He growled, barging past Draco and entering his living room, exhaustedly collapsing onto the sofa.

He heard Draco's footsteps cross the room and sit in one of the armchairs. Turning his gaze on him, he watched as his blonde friend clasped his hands behind his head and grinned. How the hell had Hermione ever fallen for this prick?

"I'm young, free and single, mate." Draco shrugged, as though it could excuse his ignorant attitude. Blaise rolled his eyes.

"You never fail to amaze me, you know that?" He muttered and Draco laughed.

"Well I am pretty damn amazing." The blonde snickered and Blaise felt his heckles rise.

"Your ability to be more of a prick than even I expect you to be is... Incredible." The italian informed his friend who turned to him, scowling.

"I'm just enjoying life, mate." He said simply and Blaise chuckled ruefully.

"You were enjoying life with the woman you wanted to marry just over two months ago, now you suddenly want to spread your seed as far and wide as possible?" Blaise asked incredulously.

"I could never marry... Her." Draco muttered, vaguely indicating the fireplace with a wave of his hand.

Blaise stood up and shook his head at his friend, sighing. Draco seemed to have reverted back to the ignorant arsehole he had been in school, leaving a trail of broken hearts behind him and not even appearing to care. It amazed Blaise that his friend could do such a one-eighty in such a small space of time, especially considering that Hermione was still bereft from the loss of him.

"Word of advice, Draco?" Blaise said, crossing to the floo and Draco cocked his brow. "Get your fucking act together."

With that, Blaise threw some powder into the flames and stepped in. He uttered his destination and span away, noting how the last thing he saw was Draco sitting in his armchair with his head hung. Hopefully, maybe, Draco would realise what he was destroying. Blaise knew that Hermione needed him a damn sight more than Draco did right now, so he was heading, once again, to hold a girl who deserved so much better than the life she had endured.

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AN:

This is the sequel, or main part, carrying on from my other story 'Secrets and Lies'.

That story gave us the back story and this is the road to Hermione's recovery.

Let me know what you think!