~May 1664~
It has been a year since my beloved's passing. I thought over time I would be alright, but whoever speaks his name in my presence, my heart drops. You'd think vampire wouldn't have gotten so lucky as to spend 23 years with her mate. Carlisle, oh Carlisle, oh how I wished I told you my secret when you had left. My undead heart aches for your presence in my un-realistic world now. Woe is me. I should have changed you my mind speaks, my conscience say differently. When I got word of him not returning with the party, my heart broke into millions, no billions of pieces. 'I need I doctor' I thought with my humorist side. When I had heard of the puddle of blood, thought of him dead in an ally or thrown overtop a dumpster. That was it I had to get out of this place. ran off to hunt and grab my ticket to the new world.
~July 20th, 2005~
Overtime I had been able to think of him without sobbing dryly or my heart breaking. I had been with other vampire males, but none had compared to my Carlisle. I was on the move again from Wisconsin to Forks, Washington. I gathered myself before I met Carlisle to feed off of animals, I had heard of a vampire coven who had switched to animals and I knew I wouldn't draw much attention as I did in Wisconsin. I was packing my bags, listening to the radio. 'I need a doctor 'came on, it fit my personality and how I ached.
I'm about to lose my mind
You've been gone for so long
I'm running out of time
I need a doctor
Call me a doctor
I need a doctor, doctor
To bring me back to life
I finished packing and basically ran from the small shack I called my home, I had to feed. How could it a song, bring up so many memories I pushed away? From the song I could tell I needed a doctor, seriously I could only think about how I left England. To mention it was my birthday, my 400th to be exact. I was a bit delusional about the whole mess. I wanted to run and that's what I did, did it matter to anyone that my mate was dead and rotting beneath the ground, no! Did anyone care for me? No! I was away in some fairytale nightmare trying my hardest to remember my love's scent, how he laughed, and how he spoke so caring. It haunted me. I tackled the nearest deer quickly and drained it; I didn't care enough to dispose the body. I stopped and dropped to my knees, sobbing. No one knew of my existence, No one knew how I felt, for the first time in my four-hundred years of existence, I felt alone. I sobbed quietly; I was grateful that I had at least packed and was ready to leave. I quickly jumped to my feet and fed off the nearest deer. I ran toward my home and loaded my car and started off for the airport. I had my ticket and handed to the airport attendant and rushed to my seat, the father I was from this place the better. I watched as we left the runway and finally touched ground in Port Angeles. I loaded my stuff in to a waiting cab and towards my apartment I had already put the lease down for. I unloaded my luggage and climbed the stairs with my stuff to get settled into my new home. In rainy, clouded, Forks, Washington. Woe is me today.