Running Out of Time
Written for the LJ community dogdaysofsummer in 2009, and Knack-verse compliant. Am in the process of uploading all fo my work, since I hosted it all at UR.
ooo
Remus shuffles into the kitchen, rubbing the grit out of his eyes as he hauls himself out of his dreams, letting the restlessness settle over him. Just a cup of tea, he thinks, drawing his robe closer around him against the chill of a summer night. He hesitates, then adds to himself, And maybe a bite of chocolate.
The dirty linoleum makes funny noises as he moves across it, reaching for the cupboard in the dark. But he and the other three have lived here for so long, they know exactly where everything –
"Nggggg…" Remus' slipper-covered foot (everyone else runs around barefoot in this little hellhole, but Remus fears for his own health) encounters something rather large, and warm, and he practically trips, only remembering to grab the counter at the last second. Then, he panics, realizing that he must have found a person on the floor of the Marauders' kitchen.
Remus wishes he had his wand, but he hadn't thought to grab it, seeing as how he'd just been going to the kitchen and all. And James went batshit crazy last month and inserted wards all over the place (the first handful were faulty; Peter came home early one day and tripped four or five, leaving the others to extricate him from a literally sticky situation that was behind bars, no less. Sometimes, James had a creative streak). But James is at Lily's tonight and Peter sleeps like a baby. So, it must be – "Padfoot?" he says cautiously, his hand going towards the cupboard again. "Is that you?"
"H-hi, Moony." The voice is tremulous, and sad, and Remus takes the chocolate and box of tea down from the shelf before he crosses to the other side and flips the light switch, making everything too bright under the harsh glare of the solitary lightbulb. What he sees is enough to make his heart shatter into a million tiny slivers. Sirius, hugging his knees, leaning against the icebox, a world-weary look in his eyes. Never has Remus seen him look so childish and mature all at once, and he thinks to himself that the combination is just very Sirius.
Instinctively, Remus grabs the bar of chocolate and sits down beside his friend, his long legs sprawling in front of him. "How long have you been here?" he asks, his voice low as he peels back the foil on his favorite food and breaks off a piece, offering it to Sirius. The other boy takes it and slowly puts it into his mouth, chewing at a languorous pace.
"I dunno. S'what time is it?" Their hips bump against each other, and Remus is glad of the contact.
"Three, I think," he says, eating a piece of his chocolate and savoring the taste. The tea will have to wait.
Sirius stifles a yawn. "Then it's been two hours or so."
Remus is shocked. Sirius had been away on assignment for a week now, and no one knew when he'd get back. And now he's here, without warning, and Remus is wondering how long he'll be here this time, how long he can stay.
How much time do we have left?
"You've been down here this whole time?" Remus says, giving him another piece of chocolate.
"I didn't want to bother anybody." Sirius buries his head in Remus' shoulder, and Remus lets him. "It's been a long week, Moony."
They sit in silence, listening to the tick of the ancient clock in the living room, until Remus finally says quietly, "Where were you?"
Sirius rubs at his eyes tiredly, and Remus feels concerned. "I can't be specific, but it was this thing in Guatemala." As a Curse-Breaker (Sirius was always one for the dramatics), his work takes him all over the world (though, lately, his work has been less with ancient artifacts and more with Death Eater traps). Remus wonders where else Sirius will be forced to go, and whether he will come back.
How much time do we have?
"Anyway," Sirius is saying, "It was just…a bloody mess." His voice drops to a hoarse whisper. "Vance didn't make it."
"Oh, Pads," Remus breathes, and he knows that not all the chocolate in world can fix this. Justin Vance is – was – his partner since he started. "I'm sorry." The words linger in the kitchen air, looking inadequate and pathetic.
"There – there was a fight," he mumbles. "We tripped an alarm or something, and then there were a dozen Death Eaters and just Vance and me and Bones…" A savage grin suddenly spreads across his angular face, making him look less human. "Took out six on my own, and Bones and Vance handled the rest." The grin suddenly vanishes, and Remus is reminded of Sirius' look on their first night at Hogwarts, after the Sorting.
It's a look of helplessness, and raw grief.
"And then someone –it might have been Bellatrix, but I wasn't sure – shot an Avada Kedavra at me after I fell, and there was no way to dodge it, but Vance decided to be stupidly heroic –" His voice is choked up by the time he falls silent, and Remus can't help but reach out an arm and draw the other boy to him, his fingers drawing soothing circles on tanned skin. Wisely, Remus doesn't say anything; he just lets Sirius burrow into his neck and soak his robe with salty tears. Inside, Remus is glad that it's only Sirius who has an intense job, because it means that Remus can be the one to stay at home and offer comfort. Remus likes being the sensible one, the steady one, the rock for Sirius and James and Peter (though James has Lily and Peter has James).
As Sirius shudders into Remus' side, and he presses comforting kisses into that shaggy black hair, Remus realizes sadly that he will cherish this moment, despite the lingering grief, because, with the war the way it was going, this might be one of the last times it is just Remus Lupin and Sirius Black, curled up on the floor together, lost in one another.
How much time?