Hey guys. Okay. So i'm sure that some of you are wondering what the hell i'm doing writing another fic when i have two others that seem to have gone on permenant hiatus. But if you're still interested, don't worry. I haven't forgotten about those. Besides, this is a One SHot. So you won't have to worry about my horrible up dating habits. Anyways, i know i've said that i wouldn't do a sad Brucas story but lets face it, there's like an omen out there regarding the brucas relationship. :( sad, i know. But what can we do? Anyways, this is kinda sad...just as a warning. It doesn't have any suicides or any of that but its not exactly the happy fun loving brucas stories that we're all used to. So please read, and enjoy it:D oh...and REVIEW!
Knock Knock Knock
Lucas tried to ignore the banging coming from his front door. He and his mother had been getting constant visits from 'friends' to offer their condolences about Keith's passing. All of them coming with fake sympathy, mock devastation, empty apologies. And Lucas hated every single one of them. Most of them hardly even knew Keith. Some were just his customers, some who had been loyal and others who had dumped him as soon as Dan offered them a deal. But nobody really knew him, really cared. Not like Lucas and Karen. So he wasn't exactly willing to go through yet another meaningless half-hearted speech of how much Keith would be missed or have to supply Kleenex and refreshments to the hysterical step-ford wives of men who had looked down on Keith all their lives. Nobody really cared. No one really grieved. To Lucas, they were all a bunch of filthy, lying hypocrites with nothing better to do than to get in on the latest buzz in town.
Truth was Lucas couldn't even stand his friends at the moment. Nathan hardly knew Keith, and wasted no time in putting him down whenever he and Dan would take a detour in their Porsche Carrera GT for the sole purpose of showing him what he couldn't have. Haley loved Keith as if he was her own uncle, and Lucas was expecting her to hurt just as much as he does. But he was disgusted at how easily she had gotten over it all. Barely two months out of his funeral and she was more concerned about her and Nathan's crummy excuse for a marriage. And then there was Peyton. Peyton, who understood what it was like to lose a parent and always knew what to say and when to say it. He thought that was what he needed. He was told that was what he needed. Someone who understood the pain he was going through. But Peyton didn't know Keith. She didn't know the fun, loving man that Lucas had always looked up to as a father. Sure she crossed paths with him on occasion, but she never knew him. Not really. And so Lucas found himself pushing away from her as well.
The only person he really let in was his mother. But she was in such a disheartened state, so broken and fragile, that he found himself afraid to be around her. Afraid he would make her hurt anymore than she was. So, in the end, he was left all alone.
"Lucas honey, would you get that?" his mother's apathetic voice filled the tiny house from the master bedroom. Lucas sighed, bitterness increasing inside him. He was fully intending on ignoring their new "pity guest" until whoever it was grew bored and left. A strong urge to break something suddenly overwhelmed him as he pushed himself off the kitchen table and slugged his way to the door. A bitter greeting was just at the tip of his tong ready to lash out at whoever was behind the door, but he froze when he saw who was on the other side. Brooke. The girl he was positive was the love of his life. The same Brooke who he couldn't stand to be around after Keith's passing. The same Brooke he began pushing away until she finally stopped pushing back. She was standing right there looking just as surprised to see him, holding a baby pink binder tightly to her chest.
"Lucas! I-I thought you'd be at Peyton's." Lucas inwardly flinched at the tiredness in her voice. She didn't sound bitter at all. Nothing like how he was expecting her to feel. In fact she just sounded…off. A little dejected and distant. And it hurt him more than he thought he could handle, knowing that he had caused it.
Flashback
It had been one month. One month and a few days. Maybe it was more than that but it couldn't have been less than a month. Lucas couldn't keep track anymore. He had been sitting in the same position on his bed since the early hours of the morning, just staring ahead of him. He wasn't thinking, didn't seem to even be blinking. His mind was a complete blank; totally numb, like how he felt. He just sat there. Eyes fixed at a picture of himself and Keith on a fishing trip which sat on top of his dresser. Even though he was only 11 at the time, he remembered that trip like it was yesterday.
What started out as a dream come true turned into a potential catastrophe as a rainstorm washed over Tree Hill without warning. A dejected Lucas miserably began turning back to head home when Keith pulled him back and said they'd continue fishing. "It's not like the water will scare the fish." he had said before he hooked another bait and through in the fishing line. Of course, they both stayed home with a horrible cold that week, but nonetheless 11 year old Lucas had loved every minute of it.
That had been one of the greatest memories of Lucas's childhood. If Lucas could feel anything that moment he would have a smile plastered on his face. But he couldn't. He wouldn't. The idea of allowing himself to feel any kind of emotion would mean opening a window where the sorrow could escape, and then there was no turning back. There was no one there who could cheer him up when the rain depressed him, no one who would risk illness just to delight him. That person was gone and in the end, Lucas was stuck outside in the rain, drenched and alone.
Even with the soft knocking, Lucas still didn't budge. It was as if he had completely detached himself from the outside world, and it didn't look like he would come back anytime soon. But even without looking up to see who had entered, he knew it was her. He could always feel her presence, and it always calmed him.
"Hey." Lucas remained motionless. The only movement was the furrowing of his eyebrows when he heard her scratchy, tired voice; a definite sign she was crying.
When he didn't even acknowledge her presence, Brooke cautiously made her way over to his side. She stayed silent for a minute to regain her composure and stop herself from crying over what she was about to do. After what happened that day, Brooke could feel Lucas drift farther and farther away from her and it terrified her. She had tried so desperately to hold on as hard as she could. Tried to be the strong one for the both of them. Tried to use their love to bring Lucas out of the dark whole he was so quickly sinking into. But no matter how much she tried, she couldn't reach him. In fact he made her feel like she was the one holding his head under the darkness, watching him drown. It broke her heart to see him so secluded and she found herself praying at night that he would recover from it all. Because, truth be told, she was having trouble holding on herself.
"Lucas…how are you feeling?" she braced herself for the bitter comments she knew he would make and surely enough, his rough, scathed voice boomed across the room.
"How do you think I'm feeling, Brooke!" he snapped. Brooke thought she would be able to handle this, but the anger in his voice made it hard to contain her own.
"I don't know Lucas! Scared? Angry? Miserable? Guilty? I know you're feeling like shit right now but I can't help you if you won't let me in!" she tried to make him understand. The only thing she really wanted was for him to get passed it all. She wanted the Lucas she fell in love with back. The one that used to cheer her up when she was down, calm her down when she over reacted, stabled her when she went wild. He was her rock, and she needed to lean on him more than ever right now. But she had to get him back first.
Lucas closed his eyes and took a deep breath to calm himself. He wasn't in the mood for this. He knew Brooke was trying to help, and he could appreciate that. But Brooke was known for her wild and carefree nature. And usually, he loved her for that. But she didn't know what it was like to lose someone you love so much. She didn't understand the emotional pain that was eating up at him every moment of the day. He didn't think she was shallow and simple, but it just wasn't in her nature to hurt so deeply. She was Brooke Davis: fun, loving and wild without a care in the world. And Lucas didn't need that right now.
"I don't want to see you right now, Brooke." Her breath caught in her throat and she closed her eyes to stop the tears from falling. When she couldn't do that, she concentrated on pushing down the sobs threatening to escape. That was it. That was all the proof she needed to know what she had to do.
Lucas could feel Brooke struggling to gain control of her shaking body and he immediately felt guilty for causing her pain. But if that's what he had to say to get his time alone, then so be it.
"I know." Her voice was thick with emotion and Lucas could hear her low sniffles as she tried to stop crying. "Which is why…I –I think we need to go on a break." Lucas's head snapped towards her, eyes wide. Did he hear her right? His eyes focused and he took a good look at her. Her hair was frizzy and all over the place rather than her usual silky smooth and perfected styles. She wasn't wearing any make up and he could tell from the redness of her eyes that she had been crying a lot more prior to their conversation. But what Lucas couldn't believe was that she was actually breaking things off. Was she really leaving him? Just like that? Not even a warning?
Brooke waited for a response from him, but all she received was his bewildered expression. "Look...I-I just think that this is what you need right now, Luke. I've had my chance and it's obviously not what you need right now." She couldn't keep the bitterness out of her voice when she said it, but she really believed this was the best thing for him—for the both of them.
Lucas pushed himself to say something, anything. Suddenly, he didn't want her to go anymore. He didn't want to lose her. Before he could sort through his thoughts, Brooke's voice broke in again. "Lucas, I know I'm the last person to be telling you this, but you really need to talk to someone. I know I'm not the person but please tell me you'll try? Please, Luke?" Lucas was dumbfounded. She was actually begging him to let her go? Brooke didn't try to hide her disappointment at his lack of reaction. It was as if he couldn't care less about what she was saying. She bit back tears as her worst fear was confirmed. "You know…you should go talk to Peyton. She's good with this stuff…pain and, loss. She'd—She'd be good for you right now."
"Is this what this is about, Brooke? Peyton's kiss?"
"Lucas, she really would be good for you right now. She could help you get through it. I'm just asking you to let her in, at least." Brooke herself couldn't believe she was doing this. She was devastated when he told her about Peyton's kiss in the library. Memories of the past came flooding back and her insecurities about them reached an all time high. But she never had a chance to deal with it. With everything else going on, her fear had to take a back seat, just as she did.
When Lucas remained unresponsive, Brooke sighed and studied the room around them. So many memories were in that room: loving memories, memories of heart break, of friendship. They all went on in this very room. Her eyes rested on a picture standing on the center of his dresser. It was of them in a photo booth back when they first started dating. As if on auto pilot, Brooke walked over to the picture and picked it up.
At first, Lucas didn't seem to notice her movement. When she got up, he continued staring in the same spot she was in as if she hadn't even moved. He was so lost. His grief for the loss of Keith was eating him up inside, but he never intended—never thought that he would lose Brooke. He loved her so much, and now he was losing her just like he lost Keith. As if just realizing her absence, Lucas turned his head and watched her as she moved towards his cabinet. She picked up a picture of them and studied it. He loved that picture. It reminded him of a time when everything was so simple; when they were just two kids falling in love, and having the time of their lives. Sometimes Lucas would stare at it for hours and wonder how he didn't realize how much he had with Brooke back then. And the memory of all that he put her through continued to haunt him.
A lone tear fell from her face onto the frame as Brooke stared down at their picture. A watery smile formed on her lips at the memory. God, she loved him so much. Taking a deep, shaky breath, she placed it back in its place, face down and turned back to Lucas.
"I should go now." She barely whispered as she gave him a weak smile. Taking hesitant steps towards him, she stared into his sky blue eyes for a few minutes he never looking back. Without really thinking, she flung herself at him and embraced him in a tight hug, tears falling freely. "I love you, Lucas." She whispered and more tears fell when he didn't even move to return the embrace.
Lucas remained motionless, just staring ahead at the top of his dresser. Where he would once look up and see Brooke's glowing smile, was now nothing but the edge of a frame. So this was it then. It was all over. He lost two of the most important people in his life in less than five minutes each. His thought drifted to the cherry blossom aroma coming off of Brooke's soft skin and a sigh escaped his lips when he felt the familiar scent calm him.
Pushing down the pain she felt at his indifference towards her, Brooke plastered on a smile before quickly pulling away from him. As soon as Lucas felt her arms loosen, his entire body tensed. He could feel the warmth of her body slowly disappear as it moved further away from his own, leaving him cold and helpless. In a split second his arms lashed out and grabbed her back to him, tightening a firm hold around her tiny body pressing her against him. And that's when he let the tears fall. Tears of loneliness, of pain and heartache; he finally allowed himself to succumb to the sorrow that was eating him up inside. And he did it all for her. He needed her to understand that he couldn't lose her. No matter what he had to do he wouldn't let her go.
Brooke, shocked by his movements, nevertheless returned his embrace and held him just as tightly. She could feel him heave as he cried into her and she was sure that this was the best thing for him. He was finally beginning to open up. She couldn't go back now, no matter how much it hurt. This was only the first step.
They both stayed in that same position, each crying in the others arm, until Brooke finally pulled away, a watery smile gracing her beautiful features.
"Good bye, Lucas."
For the rest of the day, Lucas sat transfixed as he stared at the red painted door, where she last stood.
End Flashback
That had been two weeks ago. She made a point of avoiding him ever since then. Not once had she returned his calls, answered any of his letters. It was the most time he spent outside his house. He found himself frequently going over to Peyton's in the hope that he could run into her there. But no matter when he showed up, or how long he waited, she would never be there. It had led him to seek out Peyton's comfort. And she knew it.
"What do you want, Brooke?" He immediately felt bad for his use of tone when he saw her visibly flinch. But really, what was she expecting?
"Look Lucas, I know you're mad but—"
"Mad, Brooke? No. I'm not mad. In fact I'm ecstatic. Cuz I finally get to give you the surprise I've been waiting to give you for two weeks. Tell me if it seems familiar."
"Lucas wait!" Brooke pushed at the fast approaching wooden block, her binder falling to the ground in the process. Lucas pulled the door back at the urgency in her voice. He had heard it thicken up and saw tears form in her eyes as she stared up at him.
Seeming to snap back to reality, she turned away and looked around for the folder. Lucas watched her with a heavy heart as she bent down to pick it up. She seemed so stressed, disheveled. His face softened as he watched her. She was actually nervous around him. Brooke Davis, was hardly ever nervous. And when she was, he'd always be the one to calm her down, not cause it. She snapped back up a little too forcefully, dropping a small cube package in turn.
"Here, let me—"
"No, no. I got it—"
"Just let m-muh—"
The two stubborn ex-lovers looked up to find their faces were mere inches apart. The softness of her breath tickling his senses, Lucas lost himself in her deep hazel eyes, subconsciously inching his lips towards hers. The moment was broken just as Brooke snapped back up. Lucas sighed and handed her the package.
"Here." She took it silently, smiling in thanks. And they stood like that for what seemed like hours; each one trying to think of a way out but both too stubborn to start.
"Is Karen home?" Brooke finally asked.
"Uhh…yeah. She's inside." Brooke nodded having regained control of her composure.
"How is she doing?" Lucas almost couldn't believe what he was hearing. She was here for his mother!
"Uhh…she's doing good. Why?"
"Haley told me that she still hasn't been back to the Café yet. She's really worried…" Lucas chuckled, amused.
"An-and you thought you'd come by and try to cheer her up?" as soon as the words left his mouth, he wished he could take them back. Brooke's recently pulled up confident exterior was replaced with a crestfallen expression. Okay, so joking was still not his strong point.
"She's in her room." She nodded before stepping around him and walking to her destination.
"Karen?" the soft, concerned voice filled the master bedroom as Brooke's figure appeared from behind the door. A tattered and old looking Karen was sitting on the bed, hair messy, eyes droopy and red as thought she hadn't slept in weeks.
At first Brooke hesitated before taking a step into the room. She felt a presence loom over her and jumped when she turned to see Lucas right next to her. She cursed herself for acting so jittery in front of them. They already had enough shit to deal with. They didn't need any of her silly qualms to add to it.
'Pull yourself together Brooke!' she chastised herself silently, unconsciously tightening her grip on the binder in her arms.
"Karen?" The tired woman turned to her as though just realizing her presence.
"Oh, hi Brooke. What a nice surprise." Brooke held herself back from recoiling at the monotone voice of the woman who once held so much life and energy.
"I just came by to see how you were doing." Karen smiled.
"I could be better…but it's getting easier you know, with time." Karen watched the shy young girl that stood fidgeting in front of her. She missed her lightening presence around the house. Brooke had been there for her and Luke since day one and always seemed to lighten the dark mood that persistently loomed over their household. She appreciated Brooke for her attempts to help them get through this, and although he would never admit it, she had caught glimpses of Lucas grinning at something Brooke had said when he thought no one was looking. But she hadn't seen her at all for the past couple of weeks and she could tell it had taken a toll on her son, and herself.
"What do you have there?" Brooke seemed startled at the question. She had almost forgotten the purpose of her visit.
"Oh—yeah. I-I came to give you these." She handed her the pink binder and small package.
"What are they…?"
"…Keith and my wedding presents." Karen's head snapped up towards the tense brunette and Lucas who till now had been quietly watching took an unconscious step forward.
Brooke, nervous under the sudden attention, made her way closer to Karen.
"O…kay. Well, when I first found out about Keith and your engagement that night at Tric, you could probably tell I was more than a little excited. So, naturally, I hunted him down and pressed him for details—well actually I annoyed him until he told me—but that's not the point. But OH MY GOSH Karen I cannot believe it was you who purposed! I almost slapped Keith silly for waiting so long that you actually had to be the one to do it! So naturally I was a little disgruntled. You know: no flower peddles on the ground, no getting down on one knee…it was upsetting." Brooke stopped to catch her breath, completely missing the amused yet astonished glances exchanged between mother and son.
"So after much convincing, he agreed. But he was kinda, sorta scared about telling you, so he made me promise to keep it under wraps."
Karen chuckled softly. "Well…that's great Brooke, but what…?"
"Oh! Right, those. Umm…well after that night Keith came over and asked me if I could help him make you something special. He was originally looking for Haley but she was off doing Naley business and I was board so I filled in. Poor guy though, he was a mess. I've never seen him so nervous before. But I guess you can't really blame him considering his last two cracks at the marriage thing didn't exactly have a fairy tale end-"
Brooke gasped and covered her mouth when she realized what she had just said. Karen looked at her, shock evident in her expression.
"He told you about that? About…us?"
"Oh, you mean how you turned him down when he poured his heart out to you after keeping them bottled up for more than 16 years? No." Karen didn't know whether to cry or laugh. On one hand, Brooke had reminded her of all the times she could have had with Keith as his wife. But on the other hand, she said it so…Brooke-ishly.
Lucas would have been laughing as well if he wasn't in such deep thought. He was watching his girlfr—ex. Ex-girlfriend closely ever sine she walked into the room and he noticed a strong shift in her attitude from when she met him outside. She was acting. Her façade had been pulled back on immediately after she entered the room. But this seemed to be her normal face. Cheery, chatty and carefree. And he couldn't help but wonder who she was playing: him or his mom. Or both? Sometimes it astonished him how little he really knew about her.
"I'm sorry Karen. I didn't mean—"
"No. It's okay." Karen reassured her before looking down at the two items in her hands. Brooke took another step and sat next to Karen. She picked up the cube package and handed it to her.
"Here. It took 7 hours of shopping in the same Tiffany's shop with a desperately sweaty Keith but we finally settled on this one." Her breath caught in her throat as she picked out a chain with a white-gold padded pendant hanging off of it. It was of a family. A man and wife, looking down at a newborn held in the mother's arms.
"Keith was a little apprehensive about buying it because he didn't think the baby represented Lucas well but I convinced him that it was still fitting cuz we all know Lukey will always be your baby." She glanced back at him and smiled, trying to ease the tension that was noticeably present. She looked back and watched as Karen stared adoringly at the pendant, but freaked out when she saw she was about to cry.
"Uhh…okay. Enough of this old thing. Look at this. It was my idea." She said as excitedly as she could as Karen set down the pendant. Her attention focused on the pink binder held before her. Of course it was Brooke's idea. Keith hated pink. She chuckled to herself at the thought of Brooke forcing Keith into it. Opening the front cover, tears immediately fell down her tired cheeks when she saw the cover. It was an old picture of their family on a private picnic at the park; just the three of them. No Dan, no job, no disapproved looks from people as they walked down the street. It was just her, her son, and the love of her life sitting under the cool shade of their favorite oak tree, having the time of their lives. At the top large, colorfully, bubbly letters spelled out the words Our Family, and more tears fell as she turned the page.
Brooke watched Karen as she looked through the photo album that she and Keith slaved over for so many late evenings. She smiled at some of the pictures. There were some of all three of them just sitting down and enjoying themselves. Some had Haley in them doing weird poses with Lucas, Karen rolling her eyes playfully on the side. They all looked so happy and genially content. Brooke had secretly envied Lucas and Haley as she was looking through the pictures Keith had given her. She wished she could just have one picture where she could just be normal or playful with her parents. But all of their photo albums consisted of formal poses, photo shoots, phony smiles, false happiness. It was all fake.
"Lucas! Come here, honey." The addressed obeyed the cheerful tone of his mother and made his way around the bed, making a point not to sit right next to Brooke. It was obvious but Karen was too bewildered to notice. "Look at this, sweaty. Do you remember this?" Lucas looked at the familiar picture his mother was pointing at. It was the one of his fishing trip with Lucas. He hadn't looked at that picture since his break up with Brooke.
"Yeah…" he choked and was thankful when Brooke took over.
"That was one of Keith's favorites. He always made a joke about how you weren't gonna like it when he showed you the album."
"He had a good reason to think so. See, these two over here decided it would be "thrilling" to go fishing in pouring rain. Had them sick in bed for a week." Brooke giggled at the image of Lucas drenched in his fishing suite, grinning widely as he held up a pair of dead salmon while an irritated Karen rushed to dry him. "Oh and I remember this!" Brooke's eyes widened when she saw the picture Karen referred to. The glowing faces of her and Keith dressed in Santa outfits smiled out at her. It had been taken last Christmas when Brooke thought it would be fun dressing up as Santa Clauses, Keith in the original, and hers in a low cut, high trimmed red dress with fluff on the ends and a Santa hat.
"I-I didn't even know he still had that!"
"Are you kidding me? Keith saw you as much a part of this family as Haley. I remember he used to say that having you would balance out the odds when Haley and I ganged up against him." Lucas watched Brooke's reaction carefully. In a split second, her joking, excited mask crumbled and in its place came the drained, dispirited and vulnerable girl that Lucas had gotten only glimpses of in the past. No façade, no phony smiles. There it was. And in a blink of an eye, it was gone.
"Alright well, I just thought I should—" Before Brooke could finish excusing herself, Karen had completely broken down.
"Mom!" Lucas rushed to hold her sobbing form, whilst Brooke looked on alert, feeling helpless.
"You know, I remember that night. I had come looking for Lucas and found Keith cooking a meal for you all. He asked me what I was doing for Christmas and when he found out that I was spending it alone, he kind of forced me to stay." Karen's sobs were gradually dwindling as she and Lucas watched a distant looking Brooke recall the events of that evening.
"Anyways, so I agreed to stay and he asked me if I could cook and—"she was cut off by an involuntary chuckle from Lucas, and a genuine smile graced her face for the first time that day. "—exactly. So, of course, he thought he could teach me. And I got stuck with being in charge of the casserole.
"So that's what happened to it. Keith told me that he decided to give it to the neighbors in the spirit of Christmas." Brooke chuckled.
"And you didn't wonder why you never got your pot back?"
"What pot?" Karen frowned. She had all her pot sets in perfect condition. There was no way she was missing anything.
"Actually, mom. I remember Keith coming home with a brand new pot that same week. He said it was a present for you but I guess I know why now." Karen's eyes widened, while Brooke burst out laughing, joined by Lucas. Karen watched as her son glanced at Brooke with adoring eyes. She hadn't seen him laugh like that ever since that horrible day.
"Yeah, so anyways. Keith started freaking out about how you would react because he was convinced you would notice something, so he thought up of a distraction. And thus you came home to us looking like complete idiots in Santa suites." Karen smiled.
"It does sound like something Keith would do."
"Yeah…he was a crazy one." Brooke placed a supportive hand on Karen's shoulder and squeezed it. The distraught woman smiled in thanks before turning back to the album.
"Anyways…I should get going…"
"Brooke?" Brooke turned to Karen's call. "Thank you. Keith really cared about you, you know." Her glowing expression immediately dulled, but she kept on a tight smile and nodded, before turning back.
Lucas watched her as she exited the room and could see her lean against a wall to hold herself up before dashing out of sight. She was close to breaking.
"Listen, mom. I'll be right back." He said before he ran after her, and into the drizzle that was quickly getting heavier.
"Brooke!" without really thinking, she turned back at his call, whipping back when she realized what she was doing. But the damage was done. Even through the pouring rain Lucas could see her read, mascara stained face as tears ran down her cheeks.
"Brooke…" she still wouldn't turn to him. "Are you okay?" he was surprised when she chuckled.
"You know, you're right. That really is annoying." Lucas sighed, he had it coming. He took a cautious step towards her and was surprised when she straightened her posture and turned to him with a calm face.
"Just…tell me how you're feeling." Brooke stood silent, not once breaking eye contact with him. Without warning, not that one was needed—she charged towards him and pulled his head down to hers. And she kissed him. Hard. It took less than a second for him to respond. His arms immediately flew to rest around the familiar curves of her hips. He basked at how right it all felt: to hold her so close. He escalated the kiss as his senses demanded more, his arms tightening protectively around her petite body, begging to have her closer. She moaned with pleasure as he grinded his body against hers, her muffled name escaping the corners of his lips, not willing to break apart. The sound of her name brought Brooke back to her senses and her eyes snapped open.
"Luca—" her plea was silenced as he recaptured her lips; the interlock becoming harsher, more intense.
"Lucas, stop." She said forcefully this time trying to break free, but his grip on her remained firmly in place. She pushed against him with all her might, but Lucas only tightened his hold. He wasn't going to let her go again. Not this time.
"LUCAS!" she screeched before bringing her knee up at full force and a searing pain shot through Lucas from between his legs.
"Dammit!" he yelled half because of the pain, half because he had let her go. It had gotten the effect she was going for and a red lipped Brooke was finally able to pull away. Lucas gritted his teeth and pushed the pain to the back of his mind before looking up at her.
"I'm sorry." He finally said, breaking the silence that had engulfed them.
Brooke looked at him with dull eyes and shook her head. He shouldn't be sorry. She was the one who kissed him.
"Listen, Brooke. I just want to thank you for what you did. Mom hasn't spoken, let alone laughed, like that in the past month unless she was trying to comfort Haley. It-It'll help her." Brooke gave him a week smile.
"I'm glad. And what about you? What would help you get through this?" Lucas's intense gaze bore into her deep hazel eyes.
"You know what I need, Brooke." Her face fell and she shook her head sadly. She was really the last thing he needed right now. She didn't know how much longer she could stay so collected and he didn't need her breakdown to add to his own. Especially now that he's recovered…slightly.
"You know," she started abruptly, "Keith was the only man whose trust I've never doubted. He was always open to me, was always kind and warm even after he found out I made you get that tattoo." They both smiled at the memory. Keith wasn't exactly enthusiastic when he saw the hand sized foreign symbol on his nephew's shoulder. "He was my only real parent figure, Luke. Well, besides Jarry. But lets face it, he isn't exactly a phone call away anymore. But Keith always was. And I'll forever be grateful for that. He was more of a father to me than my own ever was." Lucas felt his knees buckle beneath him at those words. It was the first time anyone had voiced his feelings so precisely. He continued to stare into her eyes, sad and distant, as Brooke finally opened up her true feelings. Lucas stood there, shocked at her revelations. He had no idea Brooke and Keith's relationship was that close. Yeah, they seemed to get along great, and Brooke spent most of her time with Lucas around Keith. But he never thought….
"Brooke, why didn't you—"
"Lucas, have you talked to anyone? I know you've stopped seeing Peyton…are you—"
"Brooke, not this again!"
"You have to let someone in!"
"Why Brooke? Why do I have to sit through pathetic attempts at mock sympathy or listen to people compare Keith's death with the time their dog was run over? Why do I have to put up with listening to them trying to convince me they know how I feel when the worst thing that's ever happened to them was that their daddy cut their allowance? Why do I have to put up with their shit!"
Brooke was taken aback by his sudden outburst, but she was more hurt than anything. She stared at him, sympathy evident in her eyes.
"You aren't the only one that lost him, Luke." Her soft voice was barely audible against the loud crackling of the pouring rain, but Lucas still heard it perfectly. He watched helplessly as she walked away, growing smaller as the distance between them increased.
And she was gone.
Leaving Lucas to once again stand in the storm. Drenched, and alone.