For the one that got away.
You have that warm scent that drew me in the first time I met you. Call it instant attraction, a mere crush, whatever you want. I called it love at first sight.
But love at first sight never seems to last, does it?
You broke the news over a cup of coffee and I hid the devastation in my eyes with the steam on my glasses.
Why of all days did you choose this? That one day of the year that's filled with hearts and flowers and declarations of love.
Yes, you did declare your love, but not for me.
You never realised what you did to me. Never. Not once in the few more years that I stayed by your side. You were so caught up in your newfound social life that you never once noticed how cold and distant I was. You never saw me fade out of the pictures I know you keep tacked to your wall.
You never saw me.
I faded out of your life like the ephemeral snowflake that fades upon a touch. You forgot me.
I remember the day I told you I'd had enough, I was going away; that look of anger and betrayal on your face. You forgot I was never yours to keep anyway.
I hated red, and I still do, even when my world has already faded into shades of grey. Have you ever thought that you might be the reason?
Love is blind. Coldly and cruelly blind. It makes you give your whole heart away and throws it back at your feet after its been trampled. Love is most definitely not your idea of a triumphant victory march. Love breaks you, and it will break you just as it has broken me.
Call me a cynic, but I will never wear my heart on my sleeve the way you wear yours. It isn't worth it to give it away so easily to uncertainty. Do you ever question why I changed?
I always wanted to as you if you loved me. Of course, you would say 'yes' with a grin on your face and I would be happy. Until you added the caveat: as a friend and partner.
I've always found it strange how you're always so quick to accuse me of leaving you. Do you ever consider that it was you who left me first?