Nightmares and Promises
A/N: Gah! I haven't written for TSOM in so long and this is the first time I've published for it, but my love for this gorgeous story has resurfaced and I stumbled across the pro-boards and there was a prompt for making a promise and I had to write this. I think it has two more parts, but we shall see. I hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: Nope. Not mine. None of it.
Chapter 1: Maria
The fireplace crackled and sparked one last time before sputtering out and leaving the once-cozy study in complete darkness. Feeling the chill, Captain von Trapp stirred from sleep and looked around in confusion before smiling softly to himself. He and his bride-to-be had fallen asleep on the couch in front of the fire. Well, he'd fallen asleep on the couch. Maria, who'd been joking only hours earlier about how she was nervous about not being able to sleep next to someone, was resting peacefully half-on top of him. Georg bit back the urge to laugh in fear of waking her and gently stroked her hair. How had he ever gotten this lucky?
His mind filled with images of how they'd ended up in his study in the middle of the night and suddenly he found it hard to go back to sleep.
Five hours earlier…
"They are finally asleep!" Maria exclaimed as she fell back against the door Georg's study. He couldn't help but grin. Once, he would've chastised her for not being able to put his children to bed at a reasonable hour, but that was before she'd barreled into his life – their lives. Now he found his fiancé's frustration rather amusing.
"I think you might be losing your touch, darling." He teased, "Did you want your whistle back?"
"Very funny, Captain." She emphasized his title with a roll of her eyes, but there was no love lost in the gesture. "I think I'm beginning to agree with you about eloping." She trudged across the room and into his open arms. "It seems the closer we get to the wedding, the less sleep your children need."
"Our children." He reminded her.
"Hmmm, no, they're definitely your children when they won't listen to me." She murmured.
"Hah! Only you could accuse me of having too many rules and too few in the same minute."
Georg expected a witty retort in return, but when he didn't get one, he looked down at Maria and frowned. Since their engagement, they still fought over nothing, but now that bantering usually lead to steamy kisses and passionate caresses until one of them pulled away long enough to run for a cold shower. Tonight though, Maria remained oddly silent with her face buried in his smoking jacket, and if he wasn't mistaken, she was shaking ever so slightly.
"Love, is everything okay?" He asked tentatively. He felt her nod against his chest, but he knew her well enough now to know that a quiet Maria was a sad Maria. Gently, he cradled her face and brought her up to meet his eyes. Oh, not sad, he realized, scared. Maybe lost? The only time he'd seen a look close to this one was just before he'd proposed and he never wanted to make her feel like that again.
"Maria, I'm sorry for teasing you. Whatever it is, you know you can talk to me, right?" He urged.
"You'll think I'm foolish." she whispered.
"It's not foolish if it's making you upset, love." He gently brushed her cheek with his thumb, hoping she would take it as a sign of trust and respect. They'd talked long into the night before about countless serious topics; their lives, the current political situation, the horrid rumors circulating about their marriage, and not once had Maria ever shied away. Honestly, it worried him to see her so shy now.
Maria studied him for a few moments before leading him over to the couch. He noticed she didn't snuggle up against him immediately, but she held his hand close.
"When I was putting the little ones to bed," she started, "they wouldn't stop asking questions, and it wasn't strange or anything, but they were so excited and asking me things like 'when are we going to have a little sister?', 'when you and father are married, can we still sing during thunderstorms?', 'will you still climb trees with us?' and between that and the older girls being so excited to go shopping with me today and talking non-stop about how exciting it was that I was going to be a Baroness and how I'd have to tell them all about the balls you'd take me to after we were married, I just realized that…"
"What?" he asked gently. "It's okay, Maria, I know you've been overwhelmed with planning the wedding and dealing with the staff and the children –"
"But that's just it," Maria took a deep breath, "I've been so wrapped up in everything leading up to the wedding and making sure that the children are happy and learning all about taking care of the villa that I never stopped to think about what would happen after we were married."
"Oh. Um, I know we've never talked about it, but darling, if you have questions or concerns about our wedding night…" He trailed off, unsure how comfortable she'd be with this kind of discussion. Much to his surprise, she laughed.
"No, Georg, that's not what I meant." She assured. "I mean, I suppose I am nervous about that as well, but…never mind." Her voice turned somber once more. "I just. I don't know how to be a wife. I mean, I don't know how to, how to be someone's companion, I've never had anyone be so close…there are things you don't know about me."
"And I can't wait to spend the rest of my life finding out what they are." He squeezed her hand tighter, but it didn't seem to stop her worry.
"What if you don't like what you find out?" She asked frantically. "What if I'm impossible to live with?"
"That's never going to happen." Georg tried to reassure her, but she wasn't convinced. "Alright. What's one, specific fear that you have?"
"What?" She asked.
"What's one specific thing you're scared of doing after we're married because you think I might not like it?" He pressed. She looked at him blankly. "You seem to be under the impression that I'm going to run as soon as you do something wrong and I'd like to show you that's not true, so tell me. What's scares you?"
Maria felt like there were a million things running around her mind and a million more she felt afraid of, but she said the first thing that popped into her head.
"I'm afraid of sleeping, I mean actually sleeping, in the same bed as you."
Georg took a moment to process the odd admission; it was certainly not what he'd expected.
"Please say something." She whispered. He'd been thinking too long.
"Well, I could assure you that there's nothing to be afraid of and tell you that it takes time to get used to sharing a bed with anyone your first time, but I think…lie down with me." He moved to lie down on the couch and left his arms outstretched for her.
"Georg?" She questioned.
"Do you trust me?" His eyes bore into hers with the same intensity as the first time he'd told her he loved her and she knew she'd never refuse him as long as he looked at her that way.
Maria moved to lie next to her fiancé and he gathered her into his arms and pressed her against him so her head lay on his shoulder and she could rest her arm against his chest. Almost immediately, her entire body relaxed as she breathed him in. He bit back the smug comment that wanted to tease her and rubbed her back as he hummed softly in her ear. Wanting to forget even more of her stress, Maria angled her head to kiss him, but he stopped her.
"Just rest, love." He insisted. "You're exhausted. Just breathe."
Maria smiled and gave him a chaste kiss before letting her eyes close and enjoying the sensations of Georg's hands on her body and his voice in the air. He waited until he was sure he'd coaxed her to sleep before giving in to his own tiredness.
Five hours later…
On their honeymoon, Georg would have to remember tease her about sleeping with him before the wedding, but for now, he was content to listen to her breathing as he held her in his arms. Only a month ago, he was sure he'd never see her again. Now, she was fast asleep in his study and in two weeks, she'd be vowing to be his for the rest of her days. He'd never have to go another day without seeing her smile, hearing her sing, watching her light up the room, feeling her –
"No."
Georg looked around for the muffled protest for a moment before realizing it must've come from Maria.
"Noo, pleeease."
Now worried, he went to rub her arm to wake her up. Her words were slurred; she was definitely having a nightmare. She began to fidget and he moved to hold her tighter so she wouldn't fall off the couch, but that proved to a huge mistake.
The second he grabbed her waist, she lashed out.
"Get off me! Get away from me! Stop it!" She screamed. It was so dark, he couldn't even be sure if she'd woken up.
"Maria, stop! Please, it's just me!" he tried to calm her down, but all she seemed to feel was him trying to hold her to stop her from getting hurt. Something wet hit his face and he realized she was crying as she continued to fight. It stunned him enough to loosen his grip and she went flying out of his arms and onto the floor.
"I hate you!" she cried as she hit the floor. Georg leapt up to turn a light on and his heart broke at the sight of his love sobbing and still fighting invisible demons on the floor. He rushed over to her and against his better judgment, grabbed her hands and pulled her close to him, resolving to hold her until she came to.
"No, no, no! Let me go!"
"Maria, shhh. Shh, it's okay. I'm here, I'm right here."
"Please, please don't kill me!" She begged.
That did it.
"MARIA!" Georg shouted as loud as he could, not caring if anyone discovered them at this hour. She stopped screaming and he felt her half-formed sleepy fists stop batting at his chest.
Maria slowly took in her surroundings and stared helplessly at Georg. Her nightmare came rushing back to her and she threw herself into his arms, crying into his shoulder.
Georg held her as she sobbed. He immediately understood her fears from earlier in the evening. He wasn't sure what triggered her nightmare, but he had enough experience with fear-riddled nights during the war to recognize her dream for what it was. His own nightmares used to terrify Agathe so badly that whenever he came home on leave, she forced him to talk about what happened before bed. It didn't always work, but at least she knew what was going on. It destroyed him to think someone had hurt Maria badly enough to haunt her dreams this strongly. His demons came to him in the form of bloodied men he'd killed, his own men that he'd lost, and sometimes in the form of his late wife dying over and over again as he failed to save her.
"I'm so sorry." Maria cried.
"No, love, you have nothing to be sorry about." He felt his own tears forming at her guilt.
"I didn't want this. I didn't want you to see. I. I'm broken."
"Maria, listen to me." This time he forced her to look at him. "I'm not going anywhere. Do you understand?"
"Why aren't you angry?" she asked.
"If it was me, would you be angry?" he answered.
"No. No, of course not." she replied. She pulled herself as close to him as possible, needing to reassure herself that he was really there.
"Can you tell me what happened?" he asked after a few moments.
"I don't know." She admitted. "I don't know if I'm ready."
He smiled.
"That's okay, but can I ask you something?"
"Yes, of course."
"These nightmares, when they happen, if they happen before the wedding, will you promise to come to me?" He knew it was a risky question, but he wanted her to truly know that he would always be there for her.
Maria seemed to think about it for a while, but eventually, she pulled back to look at him and answer.
"I promise." she whispered. "I love you, Georg."
"I love you too." he kissed her and let his passion show just how much he meant it. He gently licked at her lips to deepen the kiss, but she pulled back.
"Georg, I do want to tell you. Not right now, but I promise I will. I trust you. You….you stayed."
In the years to come, Georg would remember those words more than her wedding vows.
"I will always stay, Maria." He promised.
"As much as I love kissing you," she blushed, "I'm exhausted. Would you mind?"
"No, of course not," he moved to stand up, "let me walk you to your room, you'll be more comfortable." She grabbed his hand as he went to stand up.
"I'm comfortable here."
Georg beamed as he turned out the light and the two made their way back to the couch.
I have a really soft spot for comfort stories with these two. 3 Hope you liked it!