He could feel pain erupt inside of him with every hit he took. The kicks to his ribs, the punches to his face; they were nothing compared to how hard his delicate heart was breaking. They had mistaken him for his brother again. America must have done something so incredibly stupid to warrant this kind of beating. He had tried to speak up about to, to say that he was 'Canada dammit!' and not America, but all he got were sneers and the beating.
They left him there on the ground, a bloody, bruised mess. Slowly he got up and limped his way home. No one noticed him. They never did. His own family even forgot about him. It wasn't new. He was used to this. Yet, that didn't stop it from hurting. That hurt had somehow, slowly lead him down the path of self-loathing. He hated how he could be so weak. How he could allow himself to be forgotten, unnoticed, and unwanted.
He got to his house, unlocked the door, and dragged himself inside. He trudged languidly up the stairs and straight to the bathroom next to his room. He bent down, reached under the sink and retrieved a small, black box. He opened it and carefully took out a sleek, shiny razor. He rolled up his sleeves and took a deep breath as he lowered the blade to his wrist and gently slid it across. At that exact moment, Prussia burst into the house like a violent whirlwind.
"Yo, Mattie! The awesome Prussia is here to grace you with his presence, 'cause you know, I'm so awesome!"
He looked around and when he didn't hear the shy, timid voice of his friend he went upstairs.
"Hey Mattie, are ya up here? It's so unawesome to just ignore me!"
He paused when he reached the top, sure he had heard a small noise. He heard it again, this time going towards the bathroom. He opened the door slowly, a small hint of fear creeping over him. Something felt completely off.
"Matt? Birdie? Are you…"
He stopped mid-sentence when he saw his precious Birdie on the floor, with a razor poised over his left wrist. His breath turned ragged and his voice raspy.
"Oh Birdie…..mein gott…"
Matthew, for the first time, gave a small whimper, his lower lip trembling as tears poured down his face. At this, Gilbert rushed over to him, took the razor and pulled the battered man onto his lap. Mattie tried so hard to hold back his sobs, to not appear so weak to Gilbert, but it was of no use. Gilbert rocked him back and forth, placing small kisses all over his hair and face, wary of the bruises that formed there. His heart clenched uncomfortably, his anger rising at the sight of all the cuts and bruises that covered his Mattie.
"Shhhh Mattie, mein engel, mein liebe. I'm here. No one is going to dare to hurt you anymore. Bitte weine nicht, mein kleiner vogel."
Gilbert kept speaking sweet, gentle assurances to the smaller man, effectively calming him down. When Matthew's sobs had come to a halt, Gilbert lifted his chin carefull and looked into his soft amnythest eyes.
"Matthew…. I don't know what happened, and I can wait till you're ready to tell me, but please never do that to yourself again. Just come to me. I don't care the time or reason, just come to me. I can't stand to see you hurting. It tears me apart. I love you so much Matthew."
With that he gently brushed his lips against Matthew's in a barely there kiss. Matthew felt his face heat up and a few warm tears leak out. He threw his arms around Gilbert's neck and kissed him passionately, pouring out all of the love he had for the older man. All the love feelings he had kept bottled up for years. They pulled apart, breathless and looked each other in the eyes. Matthew blushed more as he saw Gilbert's shocked expression.
"I-I'm sorry! I j-just thought t-that y-you…"
Gilbert pressed a finger to his lips and smiled softly.
"Hush mein liebe. I was simply surprised is all.
He gave another soft kiss to his birdie and then nuzzled his face into the younger man's soft golden hair.
"I love you mein engel. I always have. Ever since that day at the World meeting 10 years ago when I first saw you. I used to think it was so unawesome feeling like this, but every time I'm with you I feel so light and happy."
He pulled his face away from Matthew's hair and gazed down at him. His eyes were glassy with tears, but he had a small smile playing on his lips.
"Oh Gilbert, you don't how happy that makes me! I was always afraid that I'd be forgotten and alone forever. When I saw you, I knew I loved you but I had convinced myself that you'd never love me like that. But now that you do, I'm so happy."
He leaned up and gave Gilbert one last kiss before he buried his bright red face into his chest. He could feel the light rumbles from Gilbert's chest as he chuckled softly.
"No more tears, alright mein liebe? I'm here now and I'll make sure you're always safe."
Matthew gave a slight nod as Gilbert smiled down at his angel.
"Ich liebe dich, Matthew. Never forget that."
"J'taime aussi, Gilbert, and I won't