This is the second story within this universe. The other one is the other story with Aeternum Bellum in the title. Reading it is not required to read this one. They're entirely separate stories, save for a few references.
It is the 41st Millennium. For more than hundred centuries, the Goddess has sat immobile on the Golden Throne of Earth. She is the Master of Mankind by Her own will, and Master of a Million Worlds by the might of Her magic. She is a rotting carcass writhing invisibly with power from a realm beyond our own.
She is the Carrion Queen of the Imperium, for whom a thousand souls are sacrificed every day, so that She may never truly die.
Yet even in Her deathless state, The Goddess continues Her eternal vigilance. Mighty battlefleets cross the daemon-infested miasma of the Warp, the only route between distant stars, their way guided by the navigators, the brave girls who stare into the realm of daemons. Vast armies give battle in Her name on uncounted worlds. Greatest among Her soldiers are the Adeptus Magica, the Mage Knights, magical girls enhanced with Her power. Their comrades in arms are Legion. The Imperial Guard and countless planetary defence forces, the ever vigilant Inquisition and the Tech-Mages of the Adeptus Mechanicus to name only a few. But for all their multitudes, they are barely enough to hold off the ever-present threat from aliens, heretics, mutants-and worse.
To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold billions. It is to live in the greatest and most bloody regime imaginable. It is to be naught but a bug compared to the titans that are the Goddess's Angels. These are the tales of those times. Forget the power of technology and science, for so much has been forgotten, never to be re-learned. Only magic may light the way now. Forget the promise of progress and hope, for the in the grim dark future there is only despair. There is no hope amongst the stars, only an eternity of despair and hatred, and the laughter of thirsting gods.
Mage Knight: A magical girl who has been recruited into a Chapter, and undergone the necessary training and augmentation. Through this, magical girls are enhanced to become the greatest fighting force at the Imperium's disposal. Without them, mankind would have fallen long ago. Split up under the command of a variety of different chapters, there an estimated two to three point four million mage knights in the galaxy at any one time.
-Excerpt from the Encyclopedia Magica
Mage Knights are what save humanity from the forces that wish to destroy it. If one contracts, then they are sacrificing themselves and whatever they may have done otherwise in the name of Her Holy Majesty. So of course, her family shall be greatly rewarded for the contribution their little girl makes to the rest of the world. Not to mention the honor and prestige that would come with raising an angel who dedicated her life to the Goddess.
-Excerpt from Magical Girl Recruitment Pamphlet, circa M38.
In the dim light of a starry night, ten millennia ago, a shooting star blazed through the skies of a world in the far reaches of the galactic east. For a brief moment, the heavens were light by the fires of the burning projectile. The sound of a thunderous impact never came.
It was prime hunting season, and a great party of nobles had set out from the great capital into the vast wilds of the planet's forests and mountains. Untouched by civilization, save for traces of a people long gone, they were filled with fierce beasts, harsh conditions, and murderous bandits.
But on the first day of this expedition, in the midst of one of the deepest forests, a little girl was discovered. She could not have been older than fifteen years. She had nothing, not even clothing, save for a single golden gem. The girl didn't seem to understand her surroundings, and couldn't say a single word the men could understand. It was as though she was a baby.
The fear of her discoverers was justified. Since as far as their history recorded, civilization had been plagued by strange disappearances, events beyond reasoning occurring. These nobles would have become her murderers were it not for one amongst their number.
Konor, the king of the city, vouched for her, and decided to give her a chance. Whether it was fate or his compassion that bound him to her, it may never be known. The party returned with haste to their home, and Konor adopted the girl as his daughter. She was surely of the age where she needed a father.
Despite her initial condition, the girl learned quickly. Within only a couple weeks, and with little instruction, the girl had mastered the language of the people. But still, all memory escaped her. She was hailed as a genius at all she did, maintaining a calm demeanor always and speaking with the greatest kindness.
But she knew not her own name. So Konor took to calling her 'The Spear', given the strange shape she somehow gave to her blonde hair. Over time, things started to happen. Previously, something, demons in the minds of the people, had come in the night to murder.
Now, it never occurred. All eyes were on the girl. Coaxing out her memories had become something Konor was dedicated to, hoping to find out the secrets of her existence. For she did not age in anyway, but acted as though she had lived for a hundred years.
One night, she was observed returning in strange garb by her adoptive father. When questioned about it, she explained that she could defeat the monsters, calling them something in a different language. She seemed to know them well. So the girl was hailed as the savior of the people, and word of her spread through merchants, hearsay, and rumor across the planet. Her genius spreading to even the field of military affairs, it was decided she should command the armies of the city.
Still, she knew not who she truly was. Occasionally, something would flash in, either happy or sad. Nothing more than that ever came. What did come was victory. A relatively bloodless victory over all those who opposed the rule of her city. Even the ruthless bandits of the mountains were pacified, and the girl set out home, intent to bring the news to her father.
He'd reached an age too great to campaign safely, and she'd preferred that he stay home. Upon her return, rebellion was all she found there. The city in flames, the nobles lashing out in a bid for control. Upon hearing of her father's death, the girl marched straight to the throne room.
The lead conspirators were there. The girl ordered her personal guards away, and sealed the doors shut. When they were finally battered down some time later, gold and crimson ribbons suspended the conspirators from the ceiling, their faces showing the agony with which they had died.
The girl knelt on the floor, clutching her head as she wept. Two words were repeated over and over again as she cried at the loss of the one true friend she had.
"Mami Tomoe."
~Ten Thousand Years Later~
(The following article is narrated by Her Ladyship Vergiana Laurentia. Any discrepancies with personal experience, knowledge, or any sort of record, are to be immediately reported to the nearest Librarium personnel.)
(Note from the Author: I know this is for an official review and all, but I choose to dress this up a bit, make it interesting to read. My memories can be cross-referenced to confirm no embellishments were made. None were. I wouldn't want to run from the truth.)
It would be on my thirteenth birthday when the Incubator would confirm that I had potential to contract. I wanted to deny it, to somehow argue with it, but how could I fight against a manifestation of Her Holy Majesty?
I could never really blame my parents for pushing me to accept the contract. It would only bring good to them. Giving two of their little girls over to the service of the Goddess would be quite the achievement. Perhaps they had my own benefit in mind, anticipating what I would face.
Only days before, my older sister had gone out on full deployment with the Lifewardens. But there I was, entirely unable to make a choice. Both options presented frightful unknowns. Resign myself to a normal, sheltered life, or make the contract and become a magical girl, fighting for humanity.
It was a question that would haunt me for a year.
Light stabbed in through the uncovered window. I wished that it would stop and leave me in peace, but the sunbeams continued to tickle my closed eyelids. I drowsily rolled over, attempting to ignore the sun.
However, the attempt was pointless. I had woken up; it would be rather futile trying to get back to sleep once again. Especially if it was the time that I thought it was.
My eyes checked the time on the clock. Before quickly turning away from the nightstand, I could see that it was eight o'clock. It was time to face my day.
Reluctantly, I shoved the blankets off of myself and sat upwards. I rubbed my eyes and scanned the room, checking to see that everything was in order. It was. I clambered out of bed and over to my sink, which located in front of the window guilty of waking me. It was an oddity I suppose, but such strange luxuries could be afforded given my birthright. My white nightgown swished with my every step.
I approached my destination and paused to survey the city. The grandness of it all always amazed me, despite the fact that I had seen the sight most days of my life. Hundreds of feet below, I could barely see the people bustling about on the streets. I was like a queen looking down upon my subjects. But I was no queen, and I had no subjects. The hundreds of people looked like an army of ants from my height. The apartments I lived in for much of my life were located some eight hundred or so feet off the ground.
I turned my gaze to my immediate surroundings, and looked down at the small sink and cabinets beneath me. I reached down and retrieved my comb from the neatly arranged row of tools I needed in the morning. I began to straighten my hair. Braiding it had never been something I enjoyed, despite the amount of it. I slowly ran my fine comb through the silver-white mess that was my hair in the morning. It reached down to about the middle of my back, and I could see the light shining off the strands as they moved.
I stared out the window as my arms began to work based on muscle memory. I scanned my eyes over the other skyscrapers surrounding the one I was in. Dozens of them stretched out for kilometers around the one I resided in, before the skyline dropped hundreds, sometimes thousands, of meters to the lower rooftops of the manufactorum and economical districts.
A brief glance took me over the manufactorum districts. Truly a blotch on the otherwise pristine gem of a city, I didn't think about them too long or hard. I could care less about those who worked there and lived there lives around such places. It was just the way the cards had fallen.
My train of thought derailed as I realized I'd been idly stroking my hair with the hairbrush for at least a few seconds now. I ceased, putting it down hurriedly. It was a tendency of mine to get wrapped up in the world around me. Hastening to grab my toothbrush before my mind could get started again, I started on my mouth.
I started to clean my teeth, then proceeded to forget about that activity as I gazed out at the starport in the distance. I continued to move the bristles along my rather clean teeth, but my mind was as usual not entirely present. Sometimes I wished I could just split up my mind, make myself focus on different things at the same time. Things would be easier that way.
There was a massive amount of traffic coming in and out of the starport, but there always was. Heraklion was a major city on a major planet. Perhaps the most major planet in the Segmentum. Most of the shipments to the Lifewardens went straight to the Fortress of Hera, far out in the mountains. That meant that most of the traffic coming into Heraklion was destined to deliver goods to the city, or have those goods shipped elsewhere on the planet.
The flow of ships was not a single, continuous stream. Rather, it was a chaotic arrangement of groups of ships leaving and departing. As soon as the airspace was clear, and the cargo bays unloaded, the ship would leave. And as soon as the space on the spaceport was open, a ship would land. It was the center of most cities, and despite the fact that Heraklion was very different from most, it still maintained the fact that the spaceport was the nexus for the entire city.
I thought it to be a truly amazing sight, like seeing the circulatory system of a human in function. However, I had never had the chance to visit it. Even though I was who I was, I had never been offworld. I knew I would eventually, but not for another dozen years, at least. That was only thanks to my father. I was indeed luckier than most. Almost all of the population would never see the wonders of another planet. None of them would have the memory of stepping onto a planet that was, to them, completely alien.
Supposedly, spaceflight had begun millennia ago, before the Heresy, the Great Crusade, Old Night, the Golden Age, back in an era we didn't have a name for. That was what I read in the more speculative texts I was allowed. Not a single record existed from that time, only Her Holy Majesty knew of what occurred then, for she has and always will be.
However, she sat far away in a state where none could speak to her. Though it may have been a foolish hope, I sought to live till the time she walked again, and drove back the darkness forever. My hand froze, as my mind thought about the true possibility of such a day.
What would it be like? I thought, will I wake up one day and hear she has returned? Will it be in our darkest hour? The moment of our greatest victory? A shiver ran through my body. Unknowingly, the toothpaste had dripped from my mouth, and I barely caught it before it hit the ground.
The rest was spat in the sink as I turned my attention back to the spaceport. I wondered what those hundreds of millions thought, about never getting to leave the city where they lived, much less the planet.
It was no fault of our own, that was for certain. I doubt the Goddess, or anyone, would allow such a thing in a better time. But now was not a better time, now was the time of the entire universe trying to kill humanity.
It's not our fault we're superior.
My view panned upwards, revealing a trio of bright points shooting through the early morning sky. They resembled shooting stars, but were a bit slower, and weren't moving quit like them. From their height and distance from the rest, they were headed out into the mountains. So they were of the Lifewardens, headed out to the Fortress of Hera.
Like the shooting stars they resembled, the group shot through the sky quickly. They were already decelerating to make a landing actually feasible. My eyes followed them as far as they would go, before they disappeared from my view.
They reminded me of what my life was to become. At that time, it was not my choice, so it was a rather unpleasant reminder. I stood idly and stared thoughtfully at the horizon for another minute.
I suddenly realized I had long since finished the brushing of my teeth. I quickly placed the brush back on the counter and picked up a glass. I held it to the sink and filled it to the brim with water. I carefully, held the glass to my lips and tipped it forwards, allowing the clear liquid into my mouth. It was cool and tasted fresh, as if it was straight from a mountain spring.
In all honesty, it most likely was. When you're a man like my father, you can certainly afford some luxuries. My eyes went in the direction of the mountains it probably came from, catching one of the more impressive sights in the city.
The fort was located in the hills to the north of the city, with the first lines of walls starting almost a kilometer from the fortress proper. Incrementally, the height of the barriers rose until they came to be about two-hundred fifty feet tall. The part that amazed me the most was the fact that it was all crewed by about ten Knights. Most of the occupants were normal humans.
The wonders of the Imperium never ceased to amaze me. But the sight of the fortress, which I knew to be named Fortrezza Heraklion, only reminded me of the future I did not want. My gaze lingered on it, but I wished I could find a way to tear myself away before the future came surging up to me.
I took a few more sips of water before I felt my usual morning headache come on. I reached down with my left hand and retrieved a bottle of pills. I placed my glass on the counter and opened up the container. I allowed two of the dark greenish cylinders to fall onto my hand.
Headaches in the morning were something I couldn't avoid for whatever reason. Fortunately, with the kind of painkiller we could afford, such a matter was trivial. I placed the two capsules on my tongue and washed them down my throat with a sip of water.
After a minute, the pain was already beginning to recede. I turned about and faced my dresser, on the other side of the room. I reached behind me and put my glass of water down once more. I strode across my spacious room to my equally impressive dresser.
I removed my nightgown and placed it in the drawer specifically for used clothes. I quickly moved to my next destination, as I hated feeling exposed.
I walked into the room to the side of mine, where I had my own shower and bath. I would then proceed to take my morning shower. The details of which I shall refrain from sharing for the sake of importance and my own privacy.
When I finished, I stepped out of the shower and quickly dried myself. When I finished with that task I surveyed the clothes which I had laid out the night before. I judged that I had chosen wisely and began to dress myself.
I threw on a white gown which stretched to my ankles, and over my torso I added a jacket, which happened to be the same shade of white. I kept my hair the way it was, long and straight.
I had already laid out my clothes the night before, so these tasks were trivial. I had even chosen my shoes for the day, but only after much deliberation. Back then, it was one of my biggest challenges. I slipped on the pair of black heels, and was satisfied.
I looked myself over and decided that I was prepared for the day. Except for one thing, I thought. I plucked a white, wide-brimmed hat from its hanger. Placing on my head, I found that I was now satisfied.
I was just walking away when I realized I'd forgotten something else. The expected shouts of my mother already ringing in my ears, I ran quickly to retrieve the bag that sad beside my bed. It contained but a few of the many books I owned thanks to the graces of my family.
They were of different subjects, but all were non-fictional. Topics of science, history, mathematics, and I knew of some books penned by members of the Mage Knights that were in fact true stories. I had a few, sitting amongst the other piles of books. They weren't very hard to obtain, seeing as how they were made on the same planet I stood on.
I sometimes felt during my reading that such things weren't entirely accurate to the truth. Enjoyment was what they had been written for. I didn't desire enjoyment. Learning was what I wanted.
With the bag in hand, I exited my bedroom, walking down the hall to the exit from my 'room' itself.
The word room is rather unfitting to describe my living space. My room and its attachment contain my bed, a personal toilet and bath, several bookshelves, and a large dining table. So more like my personal apartments. That is a fitting term.
I spent the next half a minute slowly walking down the length of my apartments, taking time to gaze out each window as I passed it. I always arranged my curtains so that each window allowed a different amount of sunlight in.
When I'd first arranged them some time ago, it had gotten me thinking. What if I wanted to be some sort of designer or artist? The fashion industry was very profitable amongst the nobles of Macragge and the other rich worlds around it.
But my parents would never allow it. Indeed, I had a chosen path, and it was apparently my duty to stick to it. Even though it was not my choice.
As I admired the curtains, I unfortunately found my gaze drifting to a place I preferred to stray my view away from. For miles and miles, even larger than the fortress I saw from my bedroom window, stretched the largest building I had ever seen in my life. I stopped walking, my heart filling to the brim with emotions I didn't want.
It was the Museo di il Vita Sfera. I had little idea what language the name was in, but the place supposedly stretched all the way back to before the Heresy. I always assumed it was some long-dead language, lost to the inexorable advance of time.
The Museo was beautiful, even from miles and miles away. Reaching five floors high, and with over a dozen massive wings, the place compiled ten thousand years of the Vita Sfera's history. Most of it was focused on the Lifewardens, and what they had done.
I did wonder if other chapters had similar monuments, but I doubted I'd ever get the chance to visit those far off places, even if I was forced into the role I didn't want, but I digress. If the other chapters did have such amazing places, then I would have liked to see them.
Truly, the greatest sin of mine is the sin of curiosity. It's why I adored the place. Time and time again I went there, till the human and magical girl auxiliaries knew me by name, and I knew them by name. Though I tried to go once every couple of weeks, finding a gap to convince my mother to take me in between barrages of tutoring, lessons, and study was usually rather difficult. I had only scratched the surface of what the museum had to offer.
It was a massive project, recording the known history of the Vita Sfera, especially the knight chapter that called it home. Battle after battle of the mage knights was enshrined there, in the form of the artworks, recollections, and trophies of the conflicts. It was a treasure to be preserved.
These days, every time I was there, I wondered if I would ever find myself there. As a statue, I mean but…It…it was hard to think about. I rarely dwelt on it for long, but whenever I did, I had to tear myself away from anything else.
My thoughts continued in this hopeless spiral for some time. Even when I reached the door I simply leaned back against it, deep in thought. Will I be able to convince mother that I don't have to do what she wants. But father wants it to, so I doubt I can make anything work.
Eventually, I snapped myself out and turned around; grabbing the handle of one of the two doors into my chambers. I swung it open with some effort. It looked heavy but was actually not very difficult to move.
I stepped out into the rooms beyond, sighing as I knew that I would have to face many things that I would not particularly want to face. As I opened the door, the air was suddenly filled with the cacophony of sounds from throughout the suites our family lived in. I could hear my mother ordering the servants about, telling them to pack this and that. I picked out of the general shouting an order to find me.
I expected this, as I probably hadn't woken up at the time mother would have liked. But I cared not for her complaints, heading towards the dining room in the middle level. The place was practically its own mansion, just located in a large skyscraper. We lived here for half the year, fall and winter, but springs and summers were always spent in a mansion in the mountains. Tomorrow was the day we were to leave. It was also an important day for me.
I sat down at the table in the large dining hall, a plate already placed there for me. The food was a bit cool, but I didn't mind enough to do anything about it. My mother stormed in a few seconds later. "Vergiana!" she shouted, "Where have you been?! It is eight-thirty!"
She wasn't angry, I could tell that. But she was displeased and would probably be "disappointed" in me. Or something like that. I at least knew she'd insist she wasn't angry at all, instead 'annoyed'. "I know that, mother," I sighed.
I took a seat at the table and placed my plate down in front of me. I put my bag of books on the chair beside me and began to dig into my breakfast.
My mother began to go on some rant about how I should be awake earlier and more prepared and other such things. I proceeded to completely ignore her. However, she did not care for such behavior.
"Vergiana! Pay attention to me when I speak!" she commanded. I moved my eyes up from my food and mockingly threw a salute at her. I took the moment to get a good glance at my mother's chosen attire. Today, she chose to wear a bright purple formal gown. She liked such attire. I had guesses as to why, but it would be a significant digression.
"Vergiana!" My mother was correct in that it was my name. "Vergiana, that was rude and you know it!" Yes, mother, I know my name is Vergiana. Was the first thought that sprung to mind, but I refrained from voicing it.
Instead, I stated "I'm sorry, I'm just a bit tired, that's all." It was true. I was still somewhat drowsy, and I had no time to get acclimated to the day yet.
"Well then, maybe you would be less tired if you didn't stay up all night studying!" my mother declared. I had stayed up, but I had not studied. There was some type of sword I had just found an interesting book on. A strange curved weapon, with a name hailing from yet another dead language.
But of course, I didn't tell this to my mother, I just complained, "I was studying! What's wrong with that?"
"You wouldn't have to study so much if you paid attention to your tutors."
I was forced to agree on that point. So I said, and I apologize for the hyperbole, for the hundredth time, "Alright, I'm sorry that I'm not paying attention, I promise to do so in the future." I did my best to make my voice sound sincere without actually having to feel sincere.
My mother took a long look at me, "I know that you're lying, and you'll as little attention next time as you did the last," she smiled, "but I know that you are driven in other areas, so I'll let it slide." She took a seat across the table from me and leaned back in the chair.
I shrugged. The motion was entirely obvious to my mother's eyes, but that was my intention after all. I sat there with complete and utter disregard for whatever my mother thought plastered onto my face. It was most certainly a challenge.
However, years of this sort of thing from me had taught the woman to never even consider biting at the substantial and incessant bait. I continued eating, glancing at the book beside me as well. My mother just seemed to be thinking, and I didn't both asking what.
It wasn't that I hated the woman. That emotion wasn't something I felt towards anyone. She was my mother, and in the end, hate wouldn't get me anywhere.
"Do you want something from me?" She asked suddenly. I almost jumped at the suddenness of it, having been wrapped up in my own mind. "You're acting like you usually do when you desire something."
I made to shake my head, but stopped halfway through the motion. My head rocked back and forth, as I considered asking the question. "Can we go to the Museo today?" I finally asked.
"Once again?" I swore she sighed, though it masterfully slipped under my observation. I nodded happily. She hadn't straight up refused, which usually meant that she would agree with whatever I asked.
As soon as I confirmed that, she could only stand up, stretching her arms out. "I suppose once before we leave tomorrow." She walked away, mumbling a few things to herself before calling back. "In an hour, alright? Then you need to get back to studying."
I knew that last part was coming, but was still pleased with the fact that we were going. The hour slipped by quickly, and it wasn't soon after that before we were on the short drive there.
I did bring a few of my books, but I found that in recent times it was harder to stay focused on them during a drive. Too often I'd just doze off, looking out the window and thinking. Not that was necessarily a bad thing, but sometimes I felt I'd run out of time to get anything read.
Today, I couldn't help but stare at the city around me. More and more I did that, always finding some new crisis to obsess over. Today my mind wandered onto the stories people like my father brought back with him. A few times, at parties I'd been dragged along too, I'd listened in on conversations with his peers, rather than spend the time with girls my age.
They spoke of worlds beyond the Vita Sfera, within the normal Imperium of Mankind. Sometimes, I regretted staying to listen to those tales. Worlds beyond imagining, with incredible cruelty and tyranny, run by the maddest of dictators. I couldn't understand how such things were possible.
Increasingly, I saw why the Sfera was the Jewel of the East. It was hard to imagine how people lived on those other, distant worlds. They must have been frightening places. Here on Macragge, I felt entirely safe. It was a fact that I could rest safely at night. The world was policed by magical girls. There wasn't any way crime could slip past their vigilance. It was simply shown by the rates, practically nothing happened that I heard of.
There was always the occasional rumor, started by groups and in circles less than trustworthy, that certain crimes were allowed to occur. Perhaps there was some merit to the idea, as the occasional robbery or assault did occur. But not everything could be stopped.
Of course, their ideas were even further discredited by their 'justification' for the theory, that this was all somehow part of some recruitment system for magical girls. I didn't see why one would contract because of a robbery, but that was another story entirely.
I shook my head, the motion slipping under the gaze of my mother. I didn't want to consider this anymore. I didn't want to think about the future. Even as I looked out the window, I felt as if the world was staring back towards me. Like every eye was turned towards me, waiting for that decision.
Crying wasn't an option. The last thing I needed was my mother talking to me. I still turned myself away, looking out the window. That motion along had to be suspicious, but I didn't want to betray weakness. Another set of lectures about bravery, and how I had to be a strong girl, would be inevitably brought forth if my mother had seen.
I stayed that way till the museum, frozen in fear of practically everything. The least I could do was try to cheer myself up. Try to face that which paralyzed with me such utter terror.
It rose a hundred feet into the air, higher than the museum itself. Painted in magnificent colors, supposedly perfectly matching the real hues. It was a work of art to surpass anything else I'd seen. I spent more time than most staring at it, feeling completely blown away by the wonder of the piece.
It was the girl who had made the Vita Sfera. I don't know what about the piece indicated its youth. It was never something I could place. Perhaps it was the face. For all but that one aspect of it could have been that of a woman, without any other statue to judge it by.
But that face said that the girl there was perhaps around fifteen years old. The statue's right arm brandished a musket towards the sky, the fingers on the arm's hand maintaining proper trigger discipline. Its left arm was extended to the other side, gesturing as though she sought applause from an audience.
The emotion in her face was indescribably real. Ice-cold determination and seriousness were what one first saw, combined with an aura of authority and command. Looking beyond that, however, it was easy to see the true visage of the statue. A kind, compassionate girl, who looked as though she could talk a demon out of killing.
A beret sat atop her golden yellow hair, which was curled into drills. Upon that beret was born the gem that signified her status. The white tassel and yellow ribbon that trailed from her hair were little details that everyone knew well.
As much as I worried about my place in the future, I could rest safely knowing I'd never bear as much responsibility as this girl. Mami Tomoe. The Primarch of the Lifewardens. Just thinking roused my heart, before my mind wandered to the fact that I could see her today.
If only I were to contract. She still sat today, between life and death, in the Fortress of Hera. Supposedly in a temple so massive that only Holy Terra's edifices equaled it, yet sealed to all but magical girls. I felt twangs of jealousy I would never admit to feeling, for if I did, it would only be construed as more incentive to accept the contract.
I whispered a quiet prayer to the Goddess, then to the Primarch whose depiction I stood before. She stood atop the front steps of the Museo. Lined up on either side were depictions of the original captains of the Lifewardens Legion. There were enough for the steps to reach very high up.
I always went ahead of my mother. I knew my way around the Museo, and it wasn't like there was any danger in the place with a magical girl around every corner. Half the reason I came here was to find privacy in a way besides cooping myself up in my room.
Privacy at least from my mother. No matter where I went, there was only so much seclusion I had. Perhaps it was merely anxiety on my part. Still, it didn't make the emotion any less real. I continued forwards into the Museo, open to anyone at for most hours of the day. It was constructed out of the massive coffers of the Lifewardens, so there wasn't any need for admission fees. The huge entrance hall was a sight many were stopped to see.
For me, it was an afterthought. There were still entire wings that I had yet to make my way through. From what I heard, materials had been brought from across the Imperium to craft that grand entrance, but I'd seen it enough times. The Primarch's statue was the one object that consistently held my attention.
It might have been that the shouts of my mother were lost amidst the ambience of the hundreds inside, but I doubt she would have worried about me. She knew me well enough.
Within the center of the Museo sat one of the more impressive things about the structure. Miles and miles of statures, and empty spaces for one. The Court of Captains contained a depiction of every single captain in the history of the chapter, even stretching back to the days of the heresy.
It had used to be one of my favorite things to see. These days, I avoided it like a sickness. Unfortunately, passing by it was one of the more efficient ways to reach various other destinations.
Despite the unhappiness this place sometimes brought me, my desire to see all that was within it sat at the same height as the desire to avoid it. And deep down, there was always the hope that coming here would help me overcome the dilemma that I faced.
I was walking alongside the outer edge of the Court. It was a long way to one of the wings I had yet to see, but I was confident that I could make it there without being caught up in my emotions about the place beside me. Though my eyes would sometimes trail to the right, I locked my head in place, stoutly refusing to acknowledge the fear.
Then there was a sound. A sound I couldn't just ignore. I came to a stop. While I regretted it, my head ended up turning to the side. I traced the sound of crying to its source. They were in front of one of the statues, all alone. A boy, a few years older than I. Actually a man, probably in his twenties.
I walked over to him, not saying a word, moving quietly. I knew it was rude, intruding on him like this, but I couldn't help myself. He was in front of a specific statue. I had managed to keep my composure for some time before I caved to this one, so we were about halfway through the Court.
So about the present day. My eyes fell upon the statue of the girl there, and quickly read the name. My eyes recognized that tell-tell phrase beneath it. Mai Solo. I shut my eyes, feeling tears welling in them. Things like this were perhaps the easiest way to bring me to tears.
He noticed me. I stepped back, gasping. "Ah, sorry." I quickly said. Apparently it was done in a way that gave a different picture of me, for his arms went to his side.
A slight bow accompanied his words, "No, milady, it's fine." He addressed me as though as I was a magical girl myself. I shook my head.
"I'm no magical girl." I said, holding up my hands. Of course, the distinctive ring and tattoo were missing.
"Oh, still thinking, then?" I confirmed that. He nodded. "I'm sorry."
There was an awkward silence for a few seconds, before I nodded to the statue. "Who was she to you?" I asked. She had died recently, based on the date.
"I'm her nephew," he said, "Son of her younger brother." He cracked a bit of a smile. "I come here every now and then." He looked rather sad. I knew that he had to know her personally.
"How often did you see her?"
The man shrugged. "Can't say exactly. She always tried to come visit when she could. Once when I was twelve, she spent the entirety of one of her leaves with me." He smiled at the memory, obviously a fond one. "She cared for me like I was a son to her."
"My sister's out there right now." I said softly. "She's…" My voice trailed off. There wasn't anything more to say. So I made to leave. "Well, I apologize for interrupting you. I should be going now."
"Are you going to contract?" He asked me. It might have been considered rude to ask such a question, but I was the one who'd violated his privacy in the first place.
That stopped me in my tracks. "Only She knows." I replied solemnly, hoping the man wasn't tired of hearing that response from foolish girls like me. With those words, I hurried away. It was safe to say that it was entirely my curiosity that brought me to that man.
Otherwise I'd have strayed as far as I could from such contact. I almost ran the rest of the way before I turned into the new wing. I wiped the tears from my eyes, praying that no one would see me crying like this. Yet crying girls weren't new around here. I probably wouldn't have really been noticed.
My mother would catch up to me some time later. I was staring at one of the latest works of art from someone who I had understood to be one of the greatest painters in recent history. Currently a Chaplain last I heard, she was hailed as the greatest artistic mind in the Sfera, if not everywhere else.
Once I'd walked towards another one of her paintings to hear a couple girls, obviously magical girls themselves, comparing her to others. Their tones sounded rather harsh. And come to think of it, they, one with pale features and the other with darker skin, didn't look like they came from the Sfera.
I had to agree with the opinion that she was at least among the greatest, as looking at her pieces never ceased to tear my mind away from my own problems. Unfortunately, it always punched holes in my own artistic aspirations. I wouldn't give up simply because someone was better, but it sometimes hurt.
Just the thought of seeing the magical girls there that one day reminded me of someone. Briefly, I considered the possibility of meeting my sister here. Whenever I came, it was something that popped into my mind. But I knew that she'd almost certainly come straight to me if she was on leave.
Her voice echoed in my head. It had been over a year since I last heard it. Over a year since she finished training, and went on full deployment. The last moments of our time together, she'd left with me with words that had defined my life for the past year.
"Find a reason to contract, and stick to it. It'll be better than you might think. Just think long and hard, and I'm sure you'll find the right wish." Albina had told me all that time ago.
I had found what seemed to be the right wish. That wasn't the problem. Then I heard another problem. "Vergiana." My mother's voice was clear to me this time. I looked towards her, perhaps showing too much disdain on my face. She furrowed her eyebrows, stomping towards me. I expected another lecture.
"I'm fine," I started the conversation ahead of time. "There's no need to worry about me." I insisted to her, walking towards her and hoping to move straight past. She just had to step in my way.
The woman glared down at me. "If you've problems to the point where you storm off like that, don't you think you should just speak about them."
I scoffed. "Like that's ever helped me." She was furious now.
"Don't take your emotions out like that, young lady. Your inability to face yourself doesn't give you right to behave like this." She said, refusing to let me by.
I shrugged, "Then punish me." I suggested. I knew she would. But I also knew she'd hate doing so, as she knew I could ultimately care less. She grabbed my hand, dragging me away. I complied, not wanting to make a big scene for my own sake more than hers.
Eventually she let go of me, and I just followed along. I wasn't sure why I'd been trying to dodge the truth for so long now. There wasn't any point but accept it.
The car was headed back. We were almost there, and I couldn't wait till we were done. Then I could at least say I was going to study, and maybe be ignored. I remembered what tomorrow was, and felt a pang of regret that today had turned out like this.
I'd somehow be reminded of it tomorrow, when I would certainly see my father. Despite his absences, he was always on time for my birthday. I was merely awaiting whatever he would bring me, I wouldn't really mind if he left right after that.
My mother's voice hadn't stopped for a while now, but I'd also been ignoring it for a while now. "-to be honest, I don't think you deserve anything at all tomorrow." There's the bombshell.
I didn't listen to her words. I rarely did anymore. "You're a girl. It's your duty to contract." I heard that one before. "Everyone is expecting the Laurentia family to produce another one, and two in the same generation would be spectacular."
I whipped my head to face her. This was a side of it I'd never heard expressed like this before. I'd heard her vaguely hint to my father that it was more about prestige that me, but never directly. "You…" I gasped, "You don't even care. Does anyone even care about the girl who has to make the contract? Or do you just think about how popular it'll make you?"
The woman reacted as though she'd accidentally let that slip. Perhaps she really had. "You're more than that, Vergiana. It's not just that." She was still my mother, and I wasn't going to just call her a liar with every word out of her mouth. "You're expected to contract, Vergiana. You're a teenage girl, what else are we supposed to see you as?"
My eyes went blank. In that second, I think I lost all sense of the world. We both went silent, the two of us understanding what had just been said, and what it really meant. It was the truth I'd tried to make myself realize.
Girls like myself were expected to contract until it was confirmed they had no potential or went over the age limit. Until then, I was seen as someone who would eventually contract. And since my potential had been confirmed, my hand was even more forced. Like so many things, I couldn't have said that I hated it. Because I didn't. It was my duty. Why try to deny that?
My eyes couldn't tear themselves from the clock. It sat right beside on my nightstand, bright red numbers ticking away as the minutes passed by. If I felt daring enough, I'd flick my gaze away to what sat beside it. Every day, I did my best to avoid looking at it.
It reminded me of the person who I was certain I would somehow fail. Because it was a portrait of that person, her smiling face beside mine. Beautifully painted, but small enough to fit on a small table. Truly something worth calling a masterpiece.
I hate to sound all melodramatic, but it wasn't easy looking at it. I kept it there to try and remind me of the words with which she parted from me. But as much as she knew me, she didn't know me well enough. Only a few days after she left had this all really begun.
Hastily, I had accomplished her wish. I found something I wanted. What had followed was the long painful battle to make a choice. A choice I still hadn't made, even as the clock neared midnight.
Quietly, I slipped down from my bed. Bare feet carried me over to the window. My hands pressed against the glass, eyes staring up at the stars. Brightly they flickered, despite the lights that polluted the sky. I could still make them out. Even if I did contract, I could never see every single one of them.
Even if I did contract, I doubted I could ever have what I wanted. I doubted that my curiosity knew reasonable bounds. It wasn't an expectation of mine to know the origin of the Goddess, nor to know of how the universe came to be. That knowledge belonged to a realm above my own.
But for a girl that wanted to know every secret of the universe save for a few, I didn't think there was anywhere to go. Even then, the thought of actually grasping such knowledge was terrifying. Going out to those stars that I wanted to see scared me.
I wasn't a coward. Cowards are afraid of everything without any distinction. Now was I fool, who just couldn't make a choice. In reality, the intelligence I possessed was more than I should have. It would have been better if I didn't understand that I knew nothing about what the world beyond my own was like.
For all I knew, I'd never get anything I wanted if I were to contract. But I had a desire. And that was all I needed, assuming that my dear sister wasn't lying to me. It wasn't in my heart to assume that about her, so I choose to believe that I was ready to contract.
All I needed to do was make the choice. Either a sheltered life as a normal human, where I'd get only a fraction of what I desired, or a life as a magical girl, where I might be able to obtain what I wanted. That was just a might, and who but the Goddess could say how it would come to an end.
Here, I'd at least have the assurance that it would be quick or painless, but out there, I had no idea how my life might come to an end. It was trees of thought like this that held me back, keeping me endlessly wrapped up in scary thoughts as I struggled to contemplate questions that shouldn't have been forced upon me.
My hands slid down the cold glass as I collapsed to my knees. Downwards turned, my eyes looked down at the streets, now mostly devoid of any travelers. The lids of my eyes were locked open, as I tried to force myself to accept it.
Tomorrow was my birthday. The fourteenth. The first since I was informed a year ago of my potential. That day was when my life had become what it is now. A maze that I had already navigated when it came before me, but with two options for an exit.
Theoretically, I had already 'won' the battle of my adolescence, I understood what my options were. There was a plan in my mind for both. The terror I felt came from the fact that I knew not what either path would lead me to. With what I could gather, staying normal could get me just as much as leaving. Perhaps I was to die in my first battle. And even if I did contract, there wouldn't be any chance to use the knowledge I'd gained.
"Tomorrow." I whispered. Half of me tried to hold back the half that spoke the words. "I will contract. I will find the bravery. I promise you, Albina. I'll find the right wish to make."
My head whipped round to look at my bed over my shoulder. I'd felt something staring at me. If anything had been there, it was gone now. But I knew exactly what had been there.
Shortly afterwards, I would fall into my bed, too tired to stay awake any longer. Wrapped up in the sheets, I'd stare at the clock for a few minutes more. Just a couple minutes before it struck midnight, I'd closed my eyes for good.
(End Chapter 1 of record)
Vita Sfera: The Vita Sfera consists of the eleven worlds under the control of the Lifewardens Chapter of the Adeptus Magica. The name was originally coined by the Primarch of the Lifewardens, Her Ladyship Tomoe. Well-known for the fact that it is administrated almost entirely by magical girls, a unique fact save for the other Chapter Worlds and the few other special worlds controlled by the Adeptus Magica, and quite isolated in terms of immigration from the rest of the Imperium. A veritable fortress island amongst the chaotic eastern reaches of the Galaxy.
-Excerpt from the Encyclopedia Magica
Note: This was probably a terrible opening. I promise it'll pick up in the next few chapters. Things should never actually get this slow again. Unless this wasn't as boring as I feared it might be. I should also note that I won't really rehash the world-building points made in the other story, but since that one's all about the Inquisition, it won't really matter too much till later, as this one's about the Mage Knights.
Update should come sometime in the next few days.