A/N
Just
a one shot a wrote when I had writers block, Review and tell me what
you think?What
would I have been doing this time last Saturday?..
Kelly smiled
to herself, relishing the memories she had thought would be gone
forever... They were gone forever, but the memories? they last a
lifetime.
"I remember, me and Rick went to Julies
barbecue, and then the pub for a few pints afterwards". She
spoke to Space through the diary room microphone. though she
spoke Partly to herself, thinking how everything was so carefree
then, so peaceful, so normal.
It was all about living for the day
then, if something went wrong you could always try again, make
amends, but that seemed so long ago now. There would never be times
like that again, and Kelly knew that.
She had to stiffle a laugh
that rose up in her throat. threatening to burst out from her chest
as she felt Pity for voice being the last one Space would ever
hear.
She looked around her slowly, enjoying the irony of
where she was.
The conformitory room, The oversizedplush
chair The Big Brother house, the ultimate isolation experience,
the imprenatrable fortress.
Where was she but trapped inside
The diary room.
A room used for the housemates to share their
thoughts and feelings. And since she had gotten there, that was all
she had seemed to do.
Think.
And talk to Space of
course.
"Maybe Some other time, hey Kelly?" Space's
voice was forced now, like the way she imagined that someone
carrying something far to heavy for them's voice would sound. it was
strangely soothing, reassuring almost.
Just Almost.
He
reminded her of Rick,it was the same kind of voice and tone he would
use to try to make everything alright.
She missed Rick.
Alot.
She resented the fact that it had taken something like this
to pull them together again, To make her realise just how much she
needed him, and him to her. Why couldn't she have seen it
sooner?
Mostly she felt bitter that she couldn't tell him how she
was feeling. How she had felt.
Her eye's were sparkling now with
emotion, and she didn't care that much for the tears that would
undoutedly fall.
She had been strong.
She had been a rock
through this whole ordeal for everyone else, and now that it was
nearly over, She was allowed to fall apart and cry and grieve her
losses.
God knows she had holded it in long enough.
The
only thing at that moment that made her retract her tears and
put on a smile was Space.
It was just her and Space left now.
"Maybe Space." She said slowly, hearing the light gasping chuckle at the other end of the microphone.
Space. She
admired him, his unwavering courage and his determination had steeled
him through this far, it had steeled them Both through.
Space had
been her "rock" for all of the times Rick wasn't there, and
even now, whilst staring death in the face, he was still looking out
for her, still trying to make her feel happy and stop her from
worrying, even when all else looked bleak.
"I'm not
feeling to well now kel, I think that this is it." He
muttered the words lowly, and Kelly knew exactly what he had meant.
This was it.
It was over.
Her single biggest regret was his definate impeding doom, he didn't deserve, out of everyone it could possibly happen to, He didn't deserve it.
"Im ready now Space, Im ready to go." her voice shook unvoluntarily, nerves seeping into her words.
"This is it, Space. Thankyou for everything." it was a lame goodbye but Kelly had thrown so much into those words, that she knew Space would realise that.
Atleast she hoped.
"You too Kell." His voice was also slightly shaky, Kelly thought that this was down to the virus, His turning.
"Space?" She had to say it, she couldn't let her last chance pass her by again. There would be no repeat of the Rick situation.
"Yeah?"
"I Love You Space-" her voice shook again slightly as she broke off into a little sob. Fate was so cruel.
"I Love You too Kelly." His Voice was a slow mumur now, barely audiable, but Kelly had understood fully what he had said. it had been crystal clear.
She loved him, and she would now be just like him.
She
had to be brave just like Space, she had to walk into death with open
arms, and show everyone she wasn't scared anymore.
She opened the
door of the diary room, not even attempting to fight back against the
horde that was awaiting her.
Her time spent over the last few
days, had made her re-evaluate the life she had lived.
it had
been full of second chances, regrets and lies. She kept telling
herself over and over, if she could go back that she would make sure
she had lived every day like her last.
Her mind didn't
concentrate on the teems of arms dragging her, grabbing her, holding
on tightly.
nor did they concentrate on the teeth brushing her
soft skin, and eventually digging in the all they could muster.
She
was brave now, and Nothing.
Nothing.
Would scare her
anymore.
Nothing could scare her anymore.
She laughed as
heartily as she could.
substituting the pain she felt for
happiness.
Her laugh vibrating off the walls of the house calling
more to the scene of attack.
Then she saw Space,
His vacant look,
His hungry mouth.
Staring into his blood ravaged face, she smiled.
She was spending lifes last minutes with the man she loved.
Even if he wasn't the man she had fallen in love with, God had dealed her a hand and she would take anything she could get.
"Just like you Space."
She was now a master of her own death.
