AN: This is a Klaine story I've wanted to try for a while. It has a splash of my favorite Robin Williams film Dead Poets Society in it too. Happy reading.
Blaine's Point of View
The rain tapping against the windowpane in Kurt's living room didn't bother me or by the look of it, Kurt either. In fact the weather outside seems to have been waiting for this moment before the sunny skies turned stormy grey. Whatever the case, it was a perfect day to watch a movie, especially a movie like Dead Poets Society. I wasn't exactly shocked when Kurt told me he hadn't even seen it, I mean we're talking about my Broadway obsessed boyfriend here. But of course since I was the guest I got to pick the movie so I chose this one in hopes Kurt would grow to love it like I have.
Halfway through the movie a question broke our comfortable silence. "Which one of us, do you think is Neil and which one is Todd in this relationship? Because, I mean, come on everyone in that Prep school knows those two have a thing, or want to." Kurt remarked from his seat beside me on the couch. Biting my lip a little and furrowing my brow, I thought about this sudden, out of the blue question. I mean I always identified with both Todd and Neil equally. I feel like I share Neil's drive and passion for the arts but at other times I feel a bit of Todd's shyness and quiet nature start to creep in. If it's just between Kurt and I, I think he is more of a Neil than I am, thus making me Todd.
A sharp poke in my side drew me out of my reverie and I turned to find Kurt with his questioning face on; one slim, well-plucked eyebrow raised and the thirst for the answer to his question in his Cerulean blue eyes. "I think you are more of Neil most days than I am. You have so much energy and passion about what you do that sometimes I'm afraid you'll run me ragged." I laughed. "Me on the other hand, I'm a Todd, more or less. I have the passion that you do; it's just quieter most of the time." He thoughtful look that crossed his face then made me want to kiss him. So I did. The kiss was unlike others we have shared, it was sweet with a hint of sadness. I don't know if our current conversation caused the feeling of sadness or maybe it was just the genre of movie we were watching.
The kiss ended just in time for us to see the reconvening of the Dead Poets Society scene. I smiled to myself at Kurt's grumble about how dirty the boys were going to get their clothes. Typical Kurt, but I wouldn't change it for anything. The rest of the movie played out as I remembered it but I wasn't watching it. I was watching Kurt and his reactions to each important scene as it played. He laughed at Charlie declaring himself 'Nuwanda', held his breath when Knox leaned down to kiss Chris on the forehead, and cried as Neil's body was discovered. The tears had dried on his cream skin by the time the movie ended but his sniffling hadn't.
"W-Why was it s-s-so sad Blaine? Why did N-Neil have to die like t-that?" he hiccupped. Rubbing a soothing hand up and down his back I sighed. "I don't know Kurt but answer me this, if he had lived would the movie have been as powerful? Would it?" The silence stretched and I could see the wheels in his head turning, contemplating the answer. Finally he turned his gaze to me. "I think if Neil had lived he would have been shipped off to another school and the movie would have ended on the same sad, but less inspiring note. It made me think, though, about how the pressure Neil felt was similar to what I felt before I came out of the closet, or even when I pretended to be straight in order to be the son my dad always wanted. If I hadn't finally been true to myself we would have never met. Or maybe we would but not in the same way, you know?"
I nod. "Yes I get what you're saying and you are right, if we had met any other way it wouldn't have been as good. As for the pressure you felt trying to conform to 'normal' society, well I'm glad you didn't do what Neil did. I'm glad I have you here with me. I love you so much Kurt." I finished my mini speech, planting a kiss on his pink inviting lips. That kiss stood for several things but most of all it was a 'I'm happy you are you and don't ever change' kind of kiss. And to me that is the best kind.