Cartman Joins the JoS!
This is based on a real cult-site called I saw how Cartman and the site share some few things so I came up with this Fic. Please note, I don't own South Park or ANY of it's characters.
Eric Cartman sits at his small computer desk, clicking on to the internet. "Let's see.. w-w-w-. He punched the enter key with his chubby finger. The infamous logo appears before his eyes and he types in another phrase, "jews are evil", and once again presses the enter key. The screen appears with over five-thousand hits, Cartman begins to read. "Anti-semitism in America, fuck that." He scrolled down the site and continued to look until his eyes spotted one site he found interesting. "Joy of satan. We hate jews because they are a hinderment to the armies of Satan and his -" He continued to read the paragraph description and clicked it with fascination. "Awwweesumme."
It's seven A.M, and Stan and Kyle walk toward the bus stop, unaware where Eric may be as he usually beat them there. "Maybe fat ass isn't coming today. That'll be awesume." Kyle said. They both giggled. "Oh damn, here he comes - what the!" Cartman tumbles toward them in along with a new look. Wearing a black t-shirt with leather pants, an inverted pentagram, and a black stocking hat. "Hail Satan, guys." They both look at each other in shock. "Dude. What the fuck!" They both burst out in laughing. "Ayy! I have my own right to.. uh.. free-speech and you guys are just trying to make me one of you jew-loving Xians!"
"Xians? What's an Xian?" Cartman folds his arm in disappointment. "You guys don't need to know the joy of Satan. That's what Maxine told me." They both look puzzled. "Who's Maxine? Another boyfriend of your Mom's?" Kyle joked. But Eric just continued to become more angry as they went on. "No! She's this cool high priestess who told me the joy of Satan!"
"What is this about the joy of Satan?"
"I can't tell you. I can only tell Stan if he joins the cool Yahoo Group and starts dressing like me."
Stan laughs. "No thanks dude, I'd rather not join another cult." He said, remembering back from when he was seen as the incarnation of L. Ron Hubbard. "You sons 'a bitches! It aint a cult! I promise! Just come with me, Stan, and I'll show you the awesume web site! Kyle can't come 'cause she said he's a minor-tity." He mispronounced. "Okay fine, I'll come with you." He turns his head quick to Kyle and whispers, "I'll tell you when I come back." They both giggle as they vanish up the hill, into the small sunlight.
To be continued...
(Sorry the first chapter's not as long as I planned, I just have a small case of writer's block. Next chapter will be up pretty soon!)