Title/ All Tied Up
Authoress/ Shimmer of an Angel
Shimmer of an Angel/ This is going to be really hard to write because I have a really bad case of writers block going on but I think this is going to turn out to be okay. Please leave a review- even if you hated it I want to know, suggestions and critical thinking are welcomed. Oh yah- this is rated M for later on...
Note/
The beginning and end sections are the narrator
Italic is Dark
The middle is Daisuke
Bold is Krad
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There are millions of people in this world, millions of people to hate and love… millions of people to lust and care… it just happens that sometimes people are attracted to one.
Soul mates are something everyone will hope fore, love mates are something everyone will have at least once… what if you were given the choice of who, what if you where given the choice of when… what if you were the one in a million that was lusted by many… and what if you had the choice… the power to choose… could you?
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Flesh against flesh, my lips pressing against this, moan and screams, pleasure and pain… unbelievable lusting… his slim body withering under me, his bear chest rubbing mine… all this consists in dreams, all this consists just once in my time.
400 years of living, 400 years of searching, 400 years of stealing… and I finally found what I want most. He hates me- I know he does, the disgust in his eyes, the hate that rolls off him in waves of misery, his purpose of hunting me resides not in lust or love but in the need to rid himself of pain… of me… or was that the other me?
I know why I crave his touch… and its not why Dai thinks… not because of Krad- I hate Krad… for being me, for touching him, for hurting him… no one but me can touch him- he is mine.
Light and dark attract… positive and negative cannot resist… this is why I crave him, his perfect lips, his milky white skin, his frozen heart… all he needs is a little sun, summer or spring, and my precious light will be fulfilled.
You know what's ironic though? He is dark… and I am light… he hides away, surrounded and swallowed by hate that is inflicted upon his fragile mind… he is like a glass bubble, beautiful and fragile that threatens to pop at the lightest breath.
But maybe we are two of a kind… both dark yearning for the light… both searching for the impossible, both begging for the love we are forbidden… whatever the cause… I love him… I want him… and that is why I will steal him.
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Craving his skin, holing onto his words, clinging to the hope that someday he will see me… hoping someday he will love me… his soft gaze, his kind words, his pitying eyes… they are my sanctuary.
Never before have I felt such longing… I longed for Risa… and I longed for Riku but in the end all I was really trying to do was lie to myself, to convince myself that I wasn't gay… that I didn't lust for his body.
Lust comes in may forms, lusting for people can often be used in may ways… the lust for human contact, the lust for learning… you can lust for may things… and I have lusted for may things but never like this before.
Every time he graces me with a smile, every time he spares me a glance, something inside me tingles… something inside me melts. I will never be able to get enough of him… never enough of his touch… I love him in every way possible… and I need him in every potential way.
I use to hide behind these feelings, hoping they would go away… but when I heard him thinking… felt him lusting… saw him dreaming… the ugly monster inside me reared its head.
Something inside me snapped… and I could no longer hide it… I need the icy prince… and I hate his icy demon.
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I have never care for a host… never lusted for its touch… never begged for its forgiveness- I was there, it was my body to control- mine! I have always believed this, believed there was nothing wrong with wanting.
Always have we wanted co-existence… always have we wanted to live on our own. Every time a new host presents themselves its like a new chance to live, the mistakes from before are still there but the gradually disappear.
I spent 400 years believing that humans were worthless pieces of trash… humans could be thrown away… and for the longest time I craved the Dark Angel I hunt, I craved to feel his touch.
I believed we were equal, that no one else could ever reach the high standards of us… but then he did it… my perfect angel reached over the top. He never really broke, he never really cried, and I respected that… for a while.
Soon I could not hold back, I wanted nothing more then to hear him scream… that's why I did it… that's why he will never forgive me. Lust is something every human contains, something every being is a subject to and I could not escape.
I love him… but I hate him… I want him… but I want to push him away… For years on end I thought about this… waiting for my turn, waiting for my opening when I could finally be let free.
When it happened it all felt wrong… never before had I felt bad about pushing my way out… never before had a host tried to keep me locked away… the pain he felt when I shoved through was easily reflected by me…
That is why I hurt him… because I can not stand the fact… that he can be happy with someone else- he can live without me… I cant stand the thought of losing my precious… I can't stand the fact that one day he will die… I can't stand it…
And so I protect him, I hide him from the rest, I give him an oasis where maybe someday he will be at rest. Until he does rest though I will never be able to stop these feelings… the lust and love I feel for him… the lust and love I need.
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And so they go on… fighting for the upper hand, none have aproched him about it… in the end they must though… in the end there will be no escape… but till then they will wait… until then they will hope… until then they will long for the say when he will tell them the three simple words they long for…
"I love you."
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Shimmer of an Angel/ There- done! This story is going to be dedicated to the first reviewer! Well… if it's a flame then it wont be but if it's a great review it will be! Oh yah- this is rated M for later on...